You are not broken
Society has a way of singling out people who are not fit to its expectations. For some, it starts in childhood where even their own family makes them feel they do not belong.
For others, they never had insecurities when they were at home and only developed mountains of things to be insecure about when they started meeting other people outside their family. Like in school, where kids are mean to others who look a bit different.
May it be in physical terms or just in actions, there are an abundant of people who would pick on these singled out individuals.
As we celebrate Pride Month, I want to take this opportunity to highlight that everyone is unique and brings their own colors in the world. The differences we may have- in sexuality or other things - are not reasons to think that you are broken.
My psychologist told me in one of our psychotherapy session, "You are not broken. You are a person who needs help."
This statement comes after my admission about wanting to find out what is wrong with me. I wanted to know the reason why I am not like the people I am surrounded with. I wanted to understand why I can not process my moods and emotions as well as others.
Basically, I was sharing this internalization I have of society's expectations. Specifically the expectation to always be on top of everything, especially emotions.
I thought I was broken, and that I was beyond help.
I heard stories
Growing up, I soaked up the same judgement that my family has on other people. I listened to their prejudiced warnings and followed them without a second thought.
I discriminated against people too because I thought that was how the world work. I am on one side and then there is the other side. And the other side is all the bad things combined.
One judgement I had when growing up was that I was supposed to stay away from people who are into people of the same sex.
I grew out of it when I was in high school, and started to meet all kinds of people. And I was also surrounded with oen minded people so I lived in this bubble of thinking that we are past the time when we would judge people based on who they love.
However, the is this one relevant moment when my parents found out that I was friends with a lesbian coworker. They were thinking malicious thoughts with no basis whatsoever.
For the background, I volunteered to help this coworker look for a place to rent at since they were from a far place and was workin in the city.
I knew a place where another friend's parent is the caretaker. So I told them that I will accompany them so they can ask about the bedspace for rent.
Unfortunately, when we got there we were denied immediately after learning that my friend is a lesbian. The reason that was said was that they did not want to make the girls uncomfortable.
I felt angry on behalf of my friend but I can tell that they were used to it. Still I apologized repeatedly because I did not expect that kind of treatment.
When I got home, I told my parents what happened. And they were in shock, not because of the treatment my friend received, but because I was friends with a lesbian.
I told them that they should not judge people just based on that and they just told me that I was young and I would understand their concerns when I grew older.
I am not older and I still never understood why. The best people I meet are people I would not have otherwise talked to had I listen to my parents.
You do not need a treatment
There are multiple instances when I felt offended because of other people's words.
One such instance is hearing people who claimed that religion made them straight again. These people act as if they did sinful things for being their own selves, and have found great salvation now that they believe themselves to be straight again.
I will not judge them for that is their belief but I hope they stop acting as if the other members of the LGBTQ+ community are just confused or are sinful because they did not turn out like them who "healed" themselves of homosexuality.
Other judgements I heard was that being part of the LGBTQ+ community is a manifestation of mental illness. They argue that it is against human nature.
Some even went as far as to say that homosexuality did not exist in the past and is only a trend for modern people. Yet there are various people from the past who had lovers of the same sex.
The point is
Society may tell you that you are broken and needs some fixing. But you are not broken for being you. There is nothin wrong with being honest with who you are.
I only hope that there will come a day when everyone can happily be their true selves without feeling the need to hide from society.
Thank you for reading this article!
If you want to read some more articles of mine, I have monthly summaries here:
December 2021 Articles Summary
November 2021 Articles Summary
Thank you for standing up for your friend. I am part of this community and I am not brave to come out to anyone. I really appreciate if someone I know also take part on standing firm against stigma. Thank you so much ❣️