@ZehraSky 13 May 2022

To believe in love (over and over) Since childhood, my perception of love is not really as magical as one might imagine. All around me, I see adults cry and suffer, then tell that it is because of love. Love for family, for children, for the time together. I never could figure that one out. I brought this pessimistic view of love. Or maybe, I brought this perception so sure that it was the only true love. The concept of being in love and happy was not something that I could understand. I thought that in time, all those in love will get tired of each other and hurt each other but never leave. Then call it love. I never imagined I will find a true love The first love that I found is in my friends. A love so strong that even during our darkest days, we were there for each other. A love so pure that even the part we did not share to the world is accepted instead of being hidden. A love so true that when we fall into lies and deceit, we call each other out on it instead of staying silent to keep the peace. In my friends, I found strength to stand for myself and for my beliefs. In them, I learned that it is okay to just be non-apologetically me instead of trying to hide parts of myself just so I could fit in. In them, I learned how to be honest with my beliefs. I used to hold my tongue and never say a word when someone says something wrong to keep the peace. But now, I know that I can correct them and instead of getting offended, they will appreciate the discussion. Of course, when I called them first love, it is because it look me a bit of time for me to realize that familial love exists. Not because my family were unloving but because I was not appreciative as a child. In my family, I learned that love comes in different forms. In them, I found that love could exist in actions when words fail us. In my family, I found unconditional love. No matter the differences in opinion or beliefs, the love is stronger. I may not agree with some of their beliefs, but I trust them to always have my back. Then I found a magical love This is a love that I never thought I would find in my lifetime. It is a love that keeps me up at night with bright hopes for the future. The love I feel for my partner is something I never felt before. It is silent yet supportive. It is calm and understanding. It is the haven instead of being part of the chaos. A story I wanted to share tonight is how my partner always make sure to be there for me even when we are physically apart. Remember that back in May 7, I had a rollercoaster of emotions due to my psychiatric appointment? Well, I kept most of my emotions back then to myself. But on Sunday, I finally broke down and told my partner about it. I told him about my doubts, and my decision to stop taking the medication. I told him a lot of things that I can not share here. All I needed from him was to be there and to listen to me. Yet he always exceeds my expectations. He invited me on a virtual date. He let me chose the movie, and I chose another animated movie. It was a Studio Ghibli film that I always wanted to watch but never found the time to do so. We watched Spirited Away. Not only that, but he also sent food to me, my sisters, and Moshi. I was embarrassed that he included Moshi but I was also grateful and touched. He knows how much I value Moshi, and that we always include her when we order food. So when he ordered food for us, he also did not forget about Moshi. The truth is I used to love looking at sunflowers because they reminded me of the sun. And in the past, I needed a sun to help me get out of the dark place I was in. In the past, I loved painting sunflowers in hopes that the will shed some shine on my life. But now, I do not find myself needing it anymore. My partner is now the sun in my life. But that is not all, he also made me realize that I carry my own shine too, and that I am a sun in my life as well. The love I learn from my partner is a love that makes me better. It is a love full of acceptance, and challenge. Not challenges that break our relationship, but challenges that build us and our individual character outside of the relationship. Closing words I have so many things I want to share about the types of love that I found. I actually did not mention the love I found in the kindness of humanity. But that may be a story for another time. For now, I hope that I managed to convey that love exists in many places. If you feel unloved, then do not be afraid to look for the love within. **Thank you for reading this article!** If you want to read some more articles of mine, I have monthly summaries here: **April 2022 Articles Summary** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/april-2022-articles-summary-42ae9c6e **March 2022 Articles Summary** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/march-2022-articles-summary-f8534b65 **February 2022 Article Summary** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/february-2022-article-summary-1ac4a2d8 **January 2022 Articles Summary** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/january-2022-articles-summary-158cfc1f **December 2021 Articles Summary** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/december-2021-articles-summary-900cb111 ****November 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/november-2021-articles-summary-2c68b6ca **October 2021 Articles Summary** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/october-2021-articles-summary-1293a999 ****September 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/september-2021-articles-summary-7febda16 ****August 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/august-2021-articles-summary-cb068f97 ****July 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/july-2021-articles-summary-fc106569 ****June 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/june-2021-articles-summary-baeb334f ****May 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/may-2021-articles-summary-5ba6d0c7