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We Didn't Say Goodbye

I have this workmate who's very sweet and so considerate to others. He's kind of cute and I'm starting to feel something for him. But he's not all that, he's kind, he's cute, he's a good person I think and he's just different to the other guy I have met before. This guy, he's the kind of guy that you want to keep for good. As in you will have that strong urge to you know, just hold him and never let go. That's what I'm feeling for him right now. And seeing him walking closer to me, I wish he's mine and I can run to him to greet him and talk to him comfortably. He's getting closer to where I am and he's sipping his coffee when he finally notice me. And when he notice me, he stop and greeted me Good Morning and ask me if I also want coffee and he will treat me. I said yes immediately, that's my chance and I don't want to miss that opportunity. This is actually not the first time that he did this to me. Actually, I am not the only one who's treating me like this but also our other colleagues. But I don't know, I'm really feeling something different and I feel like he also like me. I know, maybe I'm just assuming things but there's nothing wrong in hoping it. But I still know where to stand. Until he doesn't show anything that will give me a hint that he also like me then I won't say anything. I will just enjoy this little time that I get to spend time with him. I'm thinking too, that I should stop this feelings that is growing day by day but how can I? If I can see him everyday, talk to him and get to spend time with him. Even though it's purely a work related, still I feel like the heaven is giving me this chance to be with him. How lucky I can get right. That treating a coffee continue until now and it is not just me who's noticing it but also our colleagues. And when they teasing us like that I can't help myself but to feel happy. He's not saying anything about it, he's not reacting and just smiling to everyone. I feel like it is a sign already. But I still stop myself, I don't want to assume things and get hurt in the end. I feel like I'm special to him but I also feel that I'm not. I think he's just kind but I can't still help myself but to hope. It's been 3 months already and he's still treating me for a coffee. But nothing more and only for a coffee. He doesn't even ask me to eat with him over lunch. It's like I'm just a friend or colleagues and that I am really the only who's giving a color into his treatment to me. But I am stubborn that's why I decided to just confess my feelings to him on Valentine's Day. I decided to do it while having a coffee, so if he treat me again this morning then I will say it to him. And he did again, he did treat me again for a coffee. But before that I also saw him treating our other colleagues who has a night shift. Those people who work at night. And base on what I'm seeing he's also doing it to them, maybe not everyday but only if they had the chance they also do it. And then I think again. Maybe I am just really assuming things. I learn to like him coz his treatment to me. Maybe he's really just a kind guy who love to treat his friends and work mates. But as I've said, I am stubborn woman that's why I confess. "I like you." It is when he's handing the coffee he bought when I said that 3 words. He looks surprise and puzzled. I think he doesn't know how to react. He is just looking at me like I said the biggest joke on earth. I am waiting for his reply but it's been 2 minute already but he's still not saying anything. "I said, I Like You." "Yes. I heard it. But why?" "What why? I Like You and that's that." "No way, there should be a reason why." "I Like You because it's you." "But why? How? Is it because I am treating you for a coffee? I mean, it doesn't mean anything you know. I'm just a work mate who love to treat my work mates for a coffee. Because I know we will have a long day again and it will be a long battle of work papers." "So, it doesn't mean anything? Really?" "Yes. I'm sorry, but I don't really think about relationship right now as I have a goals and dreams to achieve. I'm sorry." "It's okay, I just want to really let you know my feelings to you so I can finally move on if I hear your answer. Thank You for the coffee again. Hehe. Bye." And just like that. My story with Him ended. I still want to be with him really. But he already stop asking me after I confess to him. Maybe he knows that I can only move on if he stop doing it. I am sad, I am hurt but that's what I get for being assuming. I can still see him off course we work in the same company. I only smile to him and he's doing the same thing. But as much as possible I am also avoiding him. I want to move on and get over with this feeling I have for him it's still here and I am not sure if when I can finally move on. But I hope soon. Liking someone is really hard specially if the one you like doesn't feel the same way as you. I enjoy our coffee time but it will be just a memory now. Those short talk that we had, I will miss him. 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