I'm Happy when I'm Sad

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Written by
2 years ago

There are really times that I long for that "sad" feelings and and want to cry to my heart content. I don't know why I find the joy in feeling that sadness. Is it just me or you too? Or can you understand what I'm saying? I mean, I find happiness in my sadness and I sometimes miss it that is why I sometimes create a sad scenario or stories in my head where I am the leading lady and I will hurt myself freely. I will make it to the point that I will cry later because of it. I don't know what's with that, is it normal?

But you know, it's a great help to me too coz after hurting myself and making myself cry, I will go back again to my old self like nothing happened. I can breath again with happiness, I can laugh again and communicating with my virtual friends will never be boring again. I sound abnormal here and I feel like I'm the only one here who do that kind of things. I mean, who find happiness in sadness right? Or who find peace in his own misery right? Or are you too?

My abnormality sometimes is a top notch and I don't know if one can ever compete me to this, charowtttt ahahaha. But really making myself cry by doing that can lift up my mood from cry baby to a crazy woman later. I can again throw some jokes and all. But there are also times that doing that is just making my feelings get worse. And if that happens that's where a my the ever companion will make it's entry, my smartphone. Good songs, cool lyrics and my headphone. It's perfect!

And you know what's my favorite scenario that I love to create in my head? A love story, lol. I can make it a tragic one or a one sided love story. There's a cheating also and there's also a love that you will bring in your death bed and you will die alone because the love of your life doesn't love you. Ahh, that kind of plot that's my most favorite and can be very effective one to make myself cry. I cry because of the plot or what. That's the only reason and nothing more.

It's just my way of making myself cry. And I feel like I am always happy that is why I need a change of mood. You can all see naman how hyper I am that even me will be annoyed sometimes because if I'm in that state my confidence will go up into 69% and I can make a decision that I will surely regret later, talk about impulsiveness righty! Or did I really just need a change of mood or I'm just stress out? I don't know the answer myself.

There are really times that I just want to sulk in one corner of my bed. You know, if only I have eyeliner here I will put some on my eyes and I will listen to My Chemical Romance playlist all day and let my tears fall into my cheeks, chorrr lol. And, crying is the best when I want to remove this feelings I have inside my heart. We can't really help it sometimes right, feeling blue and not green huehue. Good thing is it's effective to me.

But what if not? I'll be like others who can't handle their self, their emotions. Who will just let negativity eat their whole system. I'll be the one who'll be more affected if I didn't do that and I'll be the one who'll suffer. And because I can handle it why not do something that can ease it right. It's just how we handle our own emotions. And that's how I do things. By making myself sad, so yeah in my sadness, I feel a little happiness.

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How about you guys? How weird can you get sometimes? Or is this normal? Am I no the only one who do this kind of things? Do you also feel happiness to your own sadness? Ciao.


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November 15, 2021

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2 years ago

Comments

I understand you. Sadness is my inspiration. Sometimes I listen to the sad songs with intention to cry because when I am crying I feel relief...

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2 years ago

Maybe because you really want to release emotions but you need this sadness to be triggered

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2 years ago

Yes yes Chachan, nadale mo nga

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2 years ago

We forget what it means to be sad when things are going smooth for us, thats why some people have the urge for the feeling to be sad.. They will be like, how does it feel to be sad, why some people don't know what happiness is about cause of the place or situation they find themselves. Some people find it funny when others are crying.. Though it can be funny 😌😌

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2 years ago

You are still you sis, no matter what you do hehe. I can be happy when I am sad too, because some stories are created, lol!

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2 years ago

Yiehhh, yeah it's still me kahit weird haha

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2 years ago

Weird is okay sis, weird din ako, lol

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2 years ago

a little weird pero you make the best crazy stories madam so go lang ng go

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2 years ago

Hahaha yiehhh, syanga madams ,🤭🤭

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2 years ago

We are prone to suffer, but not everything is bad from the bad we bring out the good form our character, we know that life will be a constant struggle but from experience I know that it is better to let everything flow naturally in orden to better determine our emotions or simply the day of our life

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2 years ago

For me, it's normal to find ways to let your emotions to get out of your system,,it's normal to cry if you're in pain internally without thinking of many reasons. we are all vulnerable in our own ways. it's not weird for me coz I do the same too

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2 years ago

Hirap din minsam Noona gusto mo umiyak ayaw naman pumatal ng luha if di kapa mag iisip ng kwentong mapanakit di talaga ako mapapaiyak huehue

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2 years ago

The sadder I get, the happier I will be. Teehee

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2 years ago

Hahaha ganyan ka din UwU

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2 years ago

ganyan daw kapag magaganda ate BWAHAHSHAH

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2 years ago

Feeling sad and crying sometimes do help people to relief tension and take that load off their chest but I don't do that, I have other ways of relieving tension 😉 some people even find happiness in pain

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2 years ago

Yeah very true, and it's better if we will release all of that tension by crying your heart out. It's a great help that's already proven hehe

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2 years ago

Alot of people are like this. Sometimes you just have to cry it out and move on.

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2 years ago

Yeah, cry and cry and make yourself happt yes.

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2 years ago

Ako sanay na sa pabago bagong mood. Tulad kanina iyak ako ng iyak tapos ngayon okay na Naman ako. Hahaha.

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User's avatar Yen
2 years ago

Luhh, bat ka naman nag iiyak jan madam? Okie na talaga?

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2 years ago

Anxiety madam hahahaha.

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User's avatar Yen
2 years ago

This is really funny but the truth.. I do feel same way sometimes but even in that same sadness something still drives me to happiness because why hurt when you can keep hoping… at least you still make yourself happy and that’s all that matters, take care dear

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2 years ago

Yes true that, if it's what's making our heart happy right hehe

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2 years ago

When I was young I went through similar situations. I loved to play the martyr to suffer like the good girls in the soap operas. Hahaha but then I changed, never sad anymore. Only the ones according to the moment and then calm again.

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2 years ago

Haha those soap operas haha. So you don't feel that sad anymore, that's good then 😁

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2 years ago

No, my dear friend. I'm over the soap opera stage hahahaha. Now I enjoy my days. I don't know when it's my turn to leave.

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2 years ago

This reminds me of my niece, ung nadengue.. papasok yan sa CR magdadrama na gagayahin mga telenobela, akala mo my kausap ksi tagalog din ang gagamitin nya, iiyak din ng tunay jajaja.. pro d na nya ginagawa ngaun nung 9year old cguro xa

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2 years ago

Haha baka way nya lang din talaga yun para makaiyak sya haha ang cute nya lamg. Peri sana gumaling na sya.

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2 years ago

Hirap sumaya ngayun, lalo na pag maraming pagsubok. Pera talaga kadalasan problema namin. Kaya sikap nalang

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2 years ago

Sa totoo lang, magsikap nalang tayo yon ang maganda at wise na gawin

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2 years ago

My sadness comes in many ways and it goes also in many ways. Most times, I'm happy when I'm sad while some times, I'm sad when I'm happy hahahaha..this weird isn't it?

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2 years ago

Infact my dear froend, i feel so sad everyday cos of not being able to meet with my targets in life but in all, just know it that we are all in this together

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2 years ago

I feel sad about that too xoz i feel like my life is not moving at all but with the every small step we make soon we will finally get there.

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2 years ago

You are not the only one. From time to time, the same thing happens to many of us. The world is coming your way, but the beauty is that we can choose to get up and move on

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2 years ago

Yesss that's just it. We have choices so it's really up to us.

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2 years ago

Sometimes I feel a tiny bit of happiness during my dark times. It is when I feel like I am alive because I still feel pain.

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2 years ago

I cam only imagine, you're a strong woman kasi Jheapottttttt.

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2 years ago

I am happy when Im lonely. ..ang weird natin madam haha

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2 years ago

Sa totoo lang madam ano, bat kasi ganon hahaha

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2 years ago

My sadness makes me strong enough to let the emotion. If nasa happiness kasi ako I cannot acknowledge the wrong but if sadness doon ko na evaluate yung kulang. Yes , I makes me happy in my sadness.

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2 years ago

Oh yes, it can also make us strong. Sa iba di nila kaya ee. Papalunod at papalunod pa rin sila sa feelings nila hanggang sa...

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2 years ago

You know that you are talking like a philosopher? Your sadness make you happy. Deep words and I can feel an unspoken shout drowned deep inside your heart.

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2 years ago

I think what you said here is much deeper that what wrote 🙈

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2 years ago

I can feel you. ❤️

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2 years ago

Ako pala iyak talaga ako sis. Mas na eexpress ko talaga yung emotions ko.

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2 years ago

Buti madali sau ano, ako para mapaiyak need oa gumawa ng kwento sa isip ko aguuu

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2 years ago

You know what??? i don't know what the heck is wrong with me but i can't cry as well.. I do not cry easily.. I cry like once a year or so.. So, I perfectly undersatnd what you are saying here, next time we cannot cry, let's punch each other and cry abut it 🤣🤣

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2 years ago

Crying sometimes is just hard right hahaha. Like to mw I need to watch a sad movie just to cry, or create a sad story in my head just to cry I mean 🤦 hahaha yeah come on let's just punch each other. Hahaha

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2 years ago

hahahaa, well I do not cry in movies too.. something is fundamentally wrong with me lol

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2 years ago

Sometimes I felt sad then after that I realize what's going on. A lot of questions in my mind. What will be the reasons? What are the causes of everything?

Then after that I analyze it carefully then I find the answers and it makes me happy because of the sadness I felt I came to the point I will be in a center of thinking for all the things happened. I think that's the scenario I found the happiness from my sadness sis.

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2 years ago

Hmmm, di lang talaga sya maiwasan minsan na ano 🥺

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2 years ago

Oo sis.. Minsan bigla-bigla nalang talaga...

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2 years ago

Hmmm ... sadness ... a real issue in our modern grey world

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2 years ago

Yes, can't help it sometimes 🙈

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2 years ago

When I'm stressed out even though it's not enough for me to cry, I try and cry and pour my tears out

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2 years ago

That's a big help actually, I do that too.

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2 years ago

I'm also a crybaby, everytime I watched sad short clips on Facebook it's easy for my tears to fall dunno why, even an anime can make me cry easily when there's a sad part. Maybe it's my way to release my pain, it's really painful that the pain sticks in your system but there's no one yoy can talk to share your pain cause they knew that your a happy person.

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2 years ago

Even me oi, wagas magpaiyak ang anime kalamo huehuw. Ang ganda din kasi ee.

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2 years ago

It's much weirder if we were always sad and happy LOL. Sometimes we could just say we're happy and then we become one. Me too I do feel the same scheme. My inner self is sad yet I am happy, and do sometimes my outside persona is sad but deeply I am happy hahaha. An evil smile on the edge LOL.

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2 years ago

Hahahaha relate sa evil smile oi, mapapagkamalan na psychopath hahaha

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2 years ago