First Day Without My Leg

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Avatar for bmjc98
Written by
1 year ago
Topics: Personal

When I was younger, I used to have weird dreams about myself in an unknown place without my crutches. In those dreams, I had no one to help me and my only option to go back home was either to hop or crawl.

It's really odd to see me in that situation, knowing that people were constantly staring at me. Good thing those were not real, though. But today, I kind of experienced the same thing, except that I am not alone this time.

I'm not sure if I had mentioned this one on one of my previous noise posts but let me give you a quick overview. So most of you know that I used a prosthetic leg as I was born with 1 leg. Then recently, I noticed that walking was a bit no longer the same as before. The reason behind it is that there is a big crack in the socket. I mean the part where I put on my knee.

The leg, by the way, is probably 5-6 years old and already started showing signs for a replacement. We even had to put duct tape around it so it won't do further damage. Before this crack, it had already gone through its repair that it needed to be added an aluminum thingy just to secure the crack. It worked pretty well until just recently.

Poor one

The recent crack is much bigger than before. I couldn't walk properly coz I was so scared that the crack might split the socket into 2. Good thing my sister's boyfriend was needed to go back to Cebu so I took the opportunity to ask him to bring the leg with him.

So yesterday, he and my nephew left and after that, I had to use a monobloc chair just so I can at least go out in my room. It was not easy coz the chair is quite heavy and hard to walk with that, especially when going to the bathroom. Later that afternoon, I told mom to buy me crutches so I can easily do my thing at ease.

Luckily for us, there was 1 last stock left, which is worth $18. When I saw it, I got excited but, at the same time, worried that I might be having a hard time adjusting myself to this. I had not used crutches for more than a decade now so I know it would feel like torture to me, and yes, it does!

The crutches were too high for me so we had to maneuver. Still a little high, however, I can manage this time. My only problem now is that it hurts my armpit big time. Every step feels like torture to me. I'd rather use something else than this but what can I do, I've got no other options for now.

The first day without my leg was not good but hopefully, I can do better today. It's my second day, by the way.

Closing thoughts

This will be my new normal for a week I guess since making a new leg takes a bit of time. I just hope it won't take too long though. I also hope the new one will be good and won't hurt my knee that much for my first few weeks of try.

Entry 7: February 12, 2022


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Avatar for bmjc98
Written by
1 year ago
Topics: Personal

Comments

GOD be with you!

$ 0.00
1 year ago

sa cebu ra d ay na pwede mapaayo ? i hope it will return soon...

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Wala man na diria sa leyte. Mao anha ko sa Cebu puhon kay di mahimuan ug bag o ug walay bag ong sukod naku.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Seriously I never knew about this before, but my heart is in pain to hear the troubles you face, but I am proud of you at the same time because you are strong girl, I pray you more success in future. Always be the same, you are beautiful inside out. I hope soon your new leg would be ready to use.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

HEHE. It's something I used to avoid opening up but I'm good now. Sharing this is something that will inspire people not to give up in life no matter how hard the situation is. And as for the new leg, I will have to visit the city just to get it done. They can't make a new one without an accurate measurement of my knee.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

I know you are working so hard and you are strong person. I have seen/met many stronger girls/women, one which is you, who work and stronger than men. I know it's hard and sad having not a leg, but it is not that should come between you and your work. This having no artificial leg time will also pass. Be strong as you are always and work hard.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Yes, I have to be strong if I want to survive life. They will fix my leg soon and sis' boyfie will come back on the 20th. So for now, I need to wait patiently.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Take it easy and stay strong, this hard time will pass

$ 0.00
1 year ago

I did not have any idea about this, what a warrior you are.. So proud of you, people like you are living examples of not to give up in any circumstances. Hope you get a new one soon

$ 0.03
1 year ago

HEHE. Thank you. I guess I'm one of the living proofs that there's always hope in everything for as long as you won't quit life. And yes, I hope to get my new one soon. :)

$ 0.00
1 year ago

I literally like Love you.. more power to you

$ 0.00
1 year ago

I never knew you only have one leg. Anyway, things are always difficult in the beginning. Anyway, it will just be a temporary, you will soon have your prosthetic leg again soon.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Soon. Tiis tiis lang muna. :)

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Humihingi na yata ng kapalit si artificial leg mo, Ate. Anyways, matatagalan ba 'yung pag-repair n'yan? Well, sana hindi naman. Pero i guess, masasanay ka din na gamitin si crutches mo. Tyagain mo lang muna habang wala pa artificial leg mo. U can do it, Ate! :*

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Yung luma ko mapapaayos pa naman. Sa weekend matatapos din yun pero yung bago need ko pumunta ng Cebu para magpasukat ulit. Tas baka sa June pa talaga siya mapapagawa dahil ang daming pending na leg na di nila natrabaho dahil sa covid at bagyo.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Nakuha mo na 'yung pina-repair mo, Ate? Ay grabe, ang tagal din pala talagang ginagawa mga artificial legs hano?

$ 0.00
1 year ago

You can rock it sis. Take care.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Thank you sis. :)

$ 0.00
1 year ago

I hope you'll get used in using your new crutches so you can move around with ease. And I hope you can get new prosthetic legs soon. You're such a strong lady ☺️

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Soon I will. For now, all I can do is wait and use the crutches as carefully as I can. And thank you.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

No words can comfort you, but keep safe always.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Thank you and I will. :)

$ 0.00
1 year ago

A strong woman not only with her inner self but also physically... Ure one big inspiration to all of us here... Pagtyagaan mo muna magsaklay sis. Fighting

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Salamat, sis. Oo, fighting lang talaga. Kunting tiis na lang, mapapaayos ko din yung luma ko.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

I didn't know about this ate after being here for how many months. It's my first time hearing this things about you. I can't find a word to comfort you because I know you already know what you need to do more than I do. Just keep fighting!!

$ 0.03
1 year ago

You being here is enough. And yes, fighting lang talaga. Walang sukuan. :)

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Really? I am just hearing this for the first time and I couldn´t imagine what you will be going through. Sorry about that Bmj and I hope the crutches would be at ease later for you. You just need to be careful also.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Yes. I'm very slow to be sure I won't hurt myself. Don't want to cause more damage while waiting for my leg.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Honestly sis I just knew na you are born with one leg. Agoi. Kalisud jud diay ug wala Naka maanad ug gamit ug crutches. Hopefully maokay nato imong artificial leg Para Mas easier na Para nimo maglihok2x

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Mao lagi sis but need jud naku muarag cebu. Di baya jud ko ganahan mag anha anha pero importante man so no choice.

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1 year ago

Agoi. Saon needed man. Aw basta stay safe Lang always sis. Samot na covid is still everywhere

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1 year ago

This article has changed my mood😣, I knew knew about this not until today... Am really sorry about this, well for me I will strangely advice you do something about it coz I know how it feel, my dad has been disabled for over 7years now and he has not being able to walk without any aid.. Though we are happy he is still alive coz the damage was much... He got the injuries from a car accident

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Aw. :( I feel sad for your dad. I know it's harder for someone to lose his leg due to an accident than for someone who was born without it. Sakin naman, masakit lang sa kili kili pero kaya naman tiisin.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Kaya pala sabi mo sa discord nung nakaraan nagmomove ka lang gamit Yung chair.

$ 0.03
User's avatar Yen
1 year ago

Oo, dahil at that time, wala pa akong crutches. HEHE.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Siguro po gamit ka ng cloth or fabric para di masyadong masakit po sa kili kili. I hope you're doing well. :))

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Oo, yan gamit ko pero masakit pa rin kaya ang ginagawa ko dahan dahan lang movement ko para di ganun kasakit.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

You will be fine and will be used to it mj. Such a strong woman you are. God bless. I hope and pray your pros will arrived sooner.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Soon, sis. BAka sa weekend okay na. Hoping and waiting.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

I am seriously in tears now . My heart beat for you . I don't really know what to say than to say God should grant you back your full strength . Please mam use your meditation to be okay I will be praying for you from here

$ 0.03
1 year ago

I am fine. Don't worry but thank you for your concern. I really appreciate it. :)

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Keep yourself strong and adapt to everything. Never feel alone, you have a talent inside you that will make your future brighter. Just keep calm and have fun. God bless you always.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Thank you. I will try to stay strong no matter what and won't give up just for this.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Been looking up at you sis. And knowing about you this one makes me admire you more. The talented at masipag na tao na nakilala ko :) ALways fight for life. Hoping na muabot na ang new leg nimu sis. Just hang a little longer and mawala lang din ang sakit sa may ilok dapit, nabag-uhan lang ka usob kay taud taud na ka wala nag gamit.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Lagi sis. Nabag ohan jud ko kay more than 1 decade na way gamit. Mao wa sad jud koy gawas gawas sa balay kay limited edition ra akong mga bikang sa kasakit. Pero hopefully, maabot na to akong gipaayo. Puhon anha kog cebu para magpagama ug bag o kay di pwede ang daan ang sukdon.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Ahyy mao pud. Maajo bitaw jud ng maadto jud nimu pud personal sis.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

It is well with you. This challenge will not be permanent.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Thankfully, it isn't. :)

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Sis, fighter kaayo ka ay. Nakaka inspite kaayo jud ka. Fighting lang!

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Salamat, sis. Oo, fight fight lang jud ta ani. Ana jud ning life.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Karon ra jud ko nakabalo sa imo situation sis, paita bitaw ng naa na jud kay naandan gamiton unya mawala sa imo sistema, hinay2 lang anang imo crutches sis unta madali ng ayo tung imong isa ka tiil. Amping sis. 😉

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Thank you, sis. Oo, ila na gipaayo pero ang bag-o kay wala pa kay need ko muadto para magpasukod utro. Sige lang ana jud ng life.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Maanad ra ka sis. Nabag-uhan lang guru ka. I'm sure tabangan pud kas imong family diha. Antus sa lang gamay sis. Maayu unta dili tu madugay ug abot imong new leg.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Oo, agwanta lang jud ko bisan sakit. Hinay hinay lang ang lakaw naku para di sad ko ma slide.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Always be strong and safe po. I hope you can bear a little bit of using crutches while the new leg isn't arriving yet. I hope it can arrive as soon as it was done.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

No new leg unless I will personally go to Cebu. I will soon but for now, I'm just waiting for my current one to be fixed that will arrive this weekend.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Praying for your health and safety. All is well. Magiging okay din po kayo. At sana maging okay na yung leg nyo. 🙏

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Sana talaga. Nakakamiss maglakad ng hindi nahihirapan. :)

$ 0.00
1 year ago

This reminds me of my father who used to have crutches with him all the time after an awful accident. I know how painful it is, ate Mj. I am praying for your fast recovery.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Aw. Oo, fighting lang ako. Buti lang talaga andito lang ako sa bahay. Nganga talaga if andun ako sa cebu.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Praying for your fast recovery po. Get well soonest and stay healthy. Ang hirap ng sitwasyon mo po naway maging okay na yang paa mo. Godbless po ☺️

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Thank you. Magiging okay din ang lahat. :)

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Hndi adjustable yung crutches? Sana maging okay na art. leg mo. .

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Adjustable sana kaso naka locked. Di ko alam ang tawag dun. Kinut nga namin e kaso mataas pa rin.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

You're very very strong. Hope you get the new prosthetic legs soon, I can't begin to imagine how hard it's going to be for you.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

I have to be strong for myself. I can't just always on to others. I also need to stand on my own. :)

$ 0.01
1 year ago

Unta ate madali na ug buhat kay giimagine palang nakp lisud najud kaayo.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Lisod na siya kay wa na ko naanad but sauna, isa ra akong gamit kaya ra kaayo naku. Karon lahi naman jud.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Kaya mo Yan sis, Ikaw pa. Patulong ka lang, I know you have a loving family, kawawa Yung may iniinda at Walang nakakasamang pamilya na umalalay, ipag pray natin mabilis maayos Yung paa mo.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Oo, na experienced ko to before sis nung nasa cebu ako. Mahirap siya kaya it's so amazing to think na ang dami ko na palang struggles na na survived. Pasalamat talaga na kahit minsan mahirap ang situation pero God never failed to protect me against any harm.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Nafeel ko un tortue sis even though na hindi ako ganyan. Ilan days ba bago dumating un prosthetic leg mo?sana naman di gaano matagal.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Pinapaayos pa sis tas sa 20 pa balik ng boyfie ng ate ko. About sa new prosthetic, need ko talaga pumunta ng Cebu just for this. So no choice. Kelangan.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Disability can't broke us if we have strong will to fight. Really a impressive soul you are , I comes to know it now only . May Almighty God ease your problem and bless you best reward.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Thank you, my friend.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

I can see how braver you are sis!😊 I'm so proud of you by having yourself able to provide the necessities even the incompleteness. 😊🤗 Strong woman indeed♥

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Aww, thank you, sis. :) Trying to be strong.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Haay maka feel ko sa torture. Lisod gyud kaayo. Unta makuha na dayon imong new leg.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Need pa ko muadto cebu if magpagama kog bag.o so no choice jud ko bisan di ko ganahan muadto. HEHE.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

I didnt know about your condition before sis, not until i have read it on someone's article when I was still a one month user here. I admire and salute you for being strong and independent despite what you are. God bless you always sis

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Thank you so much, sis. Kaya nga minsan sinasabi ko, if I can, there's no way others can't. :) Tyaga tyaga lang talaga sa buhay. Kaya yan!

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Tama ka dyan sis, kaya fighting lang... Nakaka inspired ang buhay mo sis

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1 year ago

I didn't know this until now. I know ate na you are strong and brave woman.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Not brave but I think I'm kinda strong emotionally. Kaya fighting lang ako.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Dear, you are strong girl with hard mentality and soft heart inside. I know it’s a sad part. But everyone knows that when life puts MJ down, she bounces back.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Aww. I am touched by your words. Thank you. Indeed, I will bounce back. Slowly but surely. Thank you again.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

I didn't know you had an incapacity welcome to the club, I was also born with a condition, but in my case, it is my eyes, I can see but not well enough, and by that what I mean is that I can never drive a vehicle, nor know what the starts look like at night, the only thing I can see at night is the moon, that for some reason always follows me, just kidding.

I use big glasses for everything around my life, and if those glasses break, my life is over at that moment, but I don't complain. Having a disability has taught me to use my brain just a little bit more than average to get things done.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Wow. I didn't know that. So you're like partially blind without your glasses. And true, having a disability also taught me to use my brain a lot. Like for instance, if I want to do something, I analyze everything so I can do things without stressing myself. HEHE.

$ 0.01
1 year ago

I must say that I am close to being legally blind, and that glasses don't correct the issue whatsoever it makes it manageable. But I was born that way. But I would say God does things because they must be that way, and we have no other choice but keep on walking forward because that's our job as humans regardless of conditions or situation

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1 year ago

Don't worry sis kaya mo yan. Strong tayo palagi sis. Napaka brave mo kaya sis. Pa assist ka sis sa mom pag gusto mo tumayo o lumakad para hindi ka mahirapan sis. Sana dumating na yung replacement sis. Mag ingat ka palagi sis. Pag andyan lang kami tutulungan ka namin sis.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Thank you, sis. Oo, nag iingat lang ako dito at kahit papano, dahan dahan lang ako maglakad bahala na kung mabagal. Masakit din kasi sa underarm. Di na sanay kasi.

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1 year ago

Oo sis bahala na kung mabagal sis basta secure ka. Sana dumating na yung replacement sis.

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1 year ago

I just read in your post before and you mentioned your a pwd but I only know it now why. I admire you for being so strong MJ, and hoping your leg will okay soon and delivered t back to you. I hope there someone with you now to help you.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Thank you. Mejo matatagalan pa si leg at by the end of the month, papagawa kami but I need to travel to Cebu naman for that.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

Hope you got crutches like before. It's a good thing you got one though it's not like the old one. Let's hope for the better. May god hear your prayers.

$ 0.02
1 year ago

Yes, the least I can do is hope for the better. :) Thank you btw.

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1 year ago
$ 0.00
1 year ago

You can do it ate! Kaya mo po iyan. It's hard pero gaya ng buhay natin palagi, kakayanin natin kahit nahihirapan na. Sana andyan po ako para tulungan ka po sa paglalakad. I can be your another leg. 😊 though, I am worried po sana po meron na po replacement. Para dina po kayo mahirapan.

$ 0.03
1 year ago

Bukas sana me gagawa at matatapos lang sana kahit 3 days. And thank you. Hugs.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

A new day will be better. Just hoping time passes by quickly for the new leg to arrive. All the best. Chin up. 🌟

$ 0.02
1 year ago

Thank you, ems. Will be totally once secured some of my VIS to USD. hehe

$ 0.00
1 year ago

If I hadn't asked you on TG earlier, I would have been surprised right now.

I wish you better tomorrow! Cheer up!

$ 0.02
1 year ago

Thank you, David.

$ 0.00
1 year ago