National ID Registration
"You need to present a valid id to get a valid id" hmmm sounds ridiculous but it's so so true. Tell me if you disagree with what I just stated.
It was last year that the registration for a National ID started. My two daughters have to wake up as early as 3 am so that they could go to the designated venue and be among those who can be allowed to register becase there is a limited slot. They can only entertain about 300 applicants per day so you have to be early so you can secure your slot. They left at about 4 am and arrived at the venue at 4:15 am, living near the mall where the registration venue is is an advantage to us. They are 19 and 20 in line, and after they got there, more people started to arrive. It's a goos thing they got there ahead of the others.
They opened the venue at 8 am. They were given forms to fill up after they have presented their valid ids, my youngest daughter who's already 19 was also asked to present her psa copy of her birth certificate while my other daughter was asked to present two valid ids. After filling up the forms they waited for their turn to do the biometrics thing but unfortunately two computers had their systems down and it took them more than two hours to get them fixed, it's a good thing they had the system up that same day, if not they have to go back again the next day to continue with the registration. So my daughters finished with their registration at about 2 pm. That was the time that they had their lunch.
I was not able to join them that day because I have no valid to present yet. They said that I need to get a nso/psa copy of my birth certificate and a barangay id because I only have an old photocopy of my birth certificate and my barangay id is already expired and my birth year on my TIN id is not correct so I can't use that.
*That was the scenario last year, November 2021.*
Now, last week, I accompanied my Mom and my youngest son to a nearby mall to get them registered for their national id. By this time there are only a few people who goes to the registration site, no more waiting in long lines. You just have to go straight to the one incharge giving out the forms and present them your valid id and then you can already go inside for biometrics after filling up the form. My Mom presented her UMID card and for my son, I presented his school id and his birth certificate. So while they are waiting for their turn to go inside, there are two persons who were there beforw is, I asked the one who gives out the forms if I could use my birth certificate's photocopy, she said no but I could use my barangay id as long as it has my full name, my birthday and my complete address. That alone is acceptable as a valid id.
So yesterday, I went to a photo study to get my id pictures. Then I go straight to our barangay hall and presented my biodata, 2x2 id picture and our electricity bill as a proof that I am a resident of that barangay. It only took me less than an hour only to get my barangay id. And had it laminated before I went home.
And this morning, along with my Mom, we went back to the registration site. Presented my barangay id, filled out the form and went inside for the biometrics. The young man behind the desk confirms the information before encoding the data on the computer. Then he asked me to do the iris scan, after that I have place my two thumbs on the scanner, then my four right fingers and then the same with the left but I did it 3 times before he finally said it was okay. And lastly he asked me to look into the camera, he noticed that I was smiling slightly ( can't help smiling when there's a camera infront of me hahaha ) also he asked to brush my bangs to the side so my face will be clearly captured by the camera, which I had a hard time doing because my bangs won't cooperate, it keeps on falling back to its place. Finally, after what it feels like eternity of battling with my hair, he had my photo taken. And I'm not happy with how I look in my photo LOL Seems like I'm looking at another person. After reviewing my data on the computer and confirming it, I was given a piece of paper, a proof that I was already registered and I have to present that paper to the one who's going to deliver it.
All in all, I'm happy that I am now done with this national id issue hehe I just have to wait for months before I get my hands on this id. And of course, before going home we had a croissant and iced coffee in Dunkin Donut. And bought some burgers from Burger King for the kids and me also hahaha
**It's a good thing I didn't go with my daughters last year, I didn't have to wait in line for long hours.**
Editor's note:
Lead image from Google
Sleep Paralysis
For about over 3 years now, I have not experienced again this unnerving and scary thing in my life. It's what the doctor's named as sleep paralysis.
"Sleep paralysis is **a feeling of being conscious but unable to move**. It occurs when a person passes between stages of wakefulness and sleep. During these transitions, you may be unable to move or speak for a few seconds up to a few minutes. Some people may also feel pressure or a sense of choking." - as qouted from Google. It's like you think you're still awake but in reality you're already asleep. But mine is not just can't move or speak, it's way more than that. So I refuse to call it "sleep paralysis."
And it's not just me who's experiencing like what I had. There are other people out there who has gone through much worse than what I had experienced.
Mine is not as scary as others claim. I have read somewhere that his started out when he went to bed and in a few seconds after closing his eyes, his place became dead silent. Nothing can be heard as if he's gone deaf. And at the same time he can't move his entire body, only his eyes can move. And as his eyes set upon at the far end of where lay, there stands a figure of a woman he can't clearly see the face. She's just standing there, staring at him with her spooky red eyes. He wanted to scream and get up so he can ran outside the room....but he can't. Then the figure crouched and crawl to his side in a flash. Within a second she was right at his face and horror struck him which made him scream so loud that had his body move and with that he ran as fast as he could away from the scary figure in his bedroom. The scary face of that woman was embedded forever in his mind. And that was not the only time he experienced that so-called "sleep paralysis." It happened again to him months after the first. But this time it was in his mother's house. And a lot more scarier because his Mom also heard the scurrying noises and things being tossed across the house.
This is nothing that science can explain. How come the other person with the one experiencing "sleep paralysis" can hear and see the same things too?
In my case, mine started the instant I lay my head on my pillow. I can hear my family in the living room, just right outside of my bedroom door which I leave ajar. I can also the program they are watching so I know I am still fully awake. But then something strange started to happen. I can sense that I am not alone inside my room. Then I realized I can't move, except for my eyes. I can still hear my family talking about something. I tried to call out my Mom, even tried screaming for help but my voice abandoned me at that time.
I felt that all the hairs on my body stood up and I can sense a heavy force or aura enveloping my whole body. It seems to me like a black aura and I quickly associated it with an evil force. That's when I saw someone on the other end of my bed, it was a shadow in shape of a man. He was just standing there, staring at me but he's got no eyes, he was just a shadow or a blacksmoke-like human form, but somehow I know and I can feel that he was staring at me, motionless.
Frightened out of my wits, I started saying a prayer in my mind because I still can't speak. But as I pray, that shadow thing seemed to get angry. And I can feel the black aura getting thick and heavier and my head felt weird, like it feels like getting bigger but lighter. But scared as hell, I continue praying, I know I am screaming my prayers in my mind, I was fighting with that black shadow. And at the same time, I was also trying to make my body move. I tried shaking my head, moving my fingers and feet. Until I felt that I can move my right foot a little bit. So I focused on my right foot and gathering all the strength I have at that moment, I finally was able to lift my right foot and hit the wall beside my bed twice.
The banging sound I made caught my family's attention and rushed inside my room to see what was happening. By the time they came through the door, the shadow was gone and I can move again. I told them what had happened to me. They said that maybe I just had a nightmare but I told them that I wasn't asleep yet when that transcend. I don't know if they believed me but they said that I should always pray, which I always do.
*I don't know if it could be considered as sleep paralysis. I guess science just have to have a scientific explanation to something really unexplainable. And people who has not experienced it yet will just agree with what the doctors has said about this unnatural situation.*
***All I can say now is that prayer is still the most powerful weapon against the unknown.***
Editor's note:
Original content, story is mine and actually happened to me. Not only once but a few times already ang my eldest son has also experienced this.
Lead image from Unsplash
@Codename_Chikakiku thanks so much for the sponsorship.....again ☺️
My Everyday Thing
It has been quite a day for me today. From the moment that I wake up 'til the moment before I go to sleep. Sometimes I am amazed by myself and proud at the same time and also wondering as to where I get all the energy that I have to get everything done within the day.
MORNING HUSTLE
As soon as I open my eyes in the morning at 3:30 or 4 am, I grab my phone ( or tablet for now coz I have no cellphone yet ) to do some captcha typing, I do that for a couple of hours because that's when the loading of captchas are fast and the bids are the highest during that time. Then at about past 6 am I have to get up and fix myself so I can go out and buy our breakfast and at the same time go to the market to get something for our lunch. That trip to the bakery and market serves as my daily exercise. Imagine walking all the way from our house to the marketplace, which sums up at about 19 to 20 blocks to and fro. And consider the weight I have to carry homebound, my Mom always say that I should take a tricycle going home coz it's an uphill making it even more tiring to walk back home. But I refuse her suggestion telling her that I use that errand for my exercise.
After I got home from the market, comes the preparation of our breakfast. If I just bought hot pandesal and some spread to pair it off with, it would take just about a minute to do, I just have to make some coffee for me and my kids and tea for my Mom. But if we're having friedrice in the morning it usually takes more than half an hour before we can eat. Aside from the friedrice I have to cook eggs, hotdogs or luncheon meat or sometimes dried fish to pair with it.
Cleaning the house is next on my list of chores. I have to sweep the floor from the kitchen up to our living room. And I also have to do some mopping because our shitzhu keeps on peeing on the kitchen floor leaving an unpleasant smell. And then the porch has to be cleaned too because our labrador always has his pee and poop on the floor every morning. That's why I have to clean that place with water, soap and chlorox to eliminate the nasty odor.
Next is the front our house, dried leaves and flowers of the avocado tree in the vacant lot in front of our house litters the ground plus the garbage the stray cats scattered on the street needs a good 15 minutes of sweeping. Which is kinda hurt my back and right arm a little bit of muscle pain.
And after all these things, cooking for lunch. Time and energy I spent with cooking varies from what I have to cook. Frying takes less time and effort and dishes with broth or sauce consumes more time and effort. Table prep and clearing and washing the dishes are my kids' tasks.
AFTERNOON LULL
There's not much to do in the after lunch. This is my time to take a nap which by the way is sometimes difficult to do. I'm at the age of very much wanting to sleep but cannot. Blaming the hot weather or I just can't sleep even if wanted to.
So I face my captcha typing again if my body won't let me sleep. Making this an advantage to earn a little bit more and add some to my savings. I type away til my eyes hurt from staring at the screen for too long. And at 4 pm I'd go out for a little while to buy something for our merienda, another long walk for me. That's why my legs always hurt by night time.
EVENING GRIND
When the dish I cooked in the afternoon is not enough for our dinner I 'll go out again to buy something to add to our meal. Sometimes it's barbeque or grilled chicken or liempo. So I won't have to cook anymore. But sometimes it's eggs and noodles dinner for us, fast and easy to cook too.
After dinner, I'll go back again to my typing while watching tv. But the site is slow so I decided on watering my plants out front and check up on them to see if they needed to be repotted to a bigger pot. And I saw that some pots were infested by ants so I have to uproot my plants and wash their roots and air dry them for a few days before planting them again. The soil that I removed from the pots are placed in an aluminum pan, I heat them over low fire to kill the pests so I can still use them again later.
Chores all done but I can't go to sleep yet. I have to wait for my 2 kids who are both working now. No matter how tired I am from all the day's work, I can't sleep if any of my kids aren't home yet. And I need to wash their uniforms too so it could dry overnight, but I only do this every Wednesday and Friday.
*When I finally finish all of the things that are needed to be done, I could finally have my sleep to wake up again and do the same things over again.*
Editor's note:
Lead image from Unsplash
Ring Ring.....Good Morning
After being abandoned by my husband without a warning and not a single cent to support my five kids who were all very young then and four of them still in school.....I have to land myself a job that could provide us a decent life.
And applying in a bpo company seems to be the most rightful thing to do. A few failed attempts before I got in a company that matched my qualifications and abilities. That was almost 3 months of searching, applying, going through trainings, a few days or weeks of doing call and then quitting....for various reasons.
Going through classroom training for two weeks with the others who passed the final interview was fun and there are lots of things that I learned from our employers. They are hands-on when it comes to training their employees.
I've got nice co-trainees there, eventhough I'm the oldest in our batch, they treat me like I'm just same their age but with respect. We all became friends, we are 16 in our batch then 2 had to quit the training because of some personal reasons. After each training session, we all go out together and walk to the bus terminal, passing through through the mall. Sometimes we all eat out first, fried noodles or in any fastfood store we choose.
At the end of our training period, we celebrated our passing the final stage of our application by having a drink in a nearby convenience store. At that time, drinking were still allowed in that place but as years passed, it was already prohibited. Our boss gives us some money to buy a couple buckets of drinks and some barbeque to enjoy. Some nights they would join us and have a drink or two.
*The start of real work*
When we were still in training and while doing some shadowing beside an agent engaged in a call, seems like the work is just easy. Asking questions and then typing down the answers. But it was not that easy specially when the person on the other side of the line is not so cooperative.
We sometimes encounter people who doesn't want to verify some information, saying that they are not comfortable with giving out their info or data. There are times that we chance upon an irate client, they get mad at us, claiming that they did not apply for anything. Questioning us if how come we have their information. They don't listen to our explanation that the papers or application form were just given to us by the bank to be verified. And if they didn't really want to push through with the application then it's completely alright. Some clients even go as far as getting our names and contact information, threatening to sue us. But not of us really got sued anyway hahaha
Then I often encounter clients, male clients that is, who would ask for my cellphone number. Which I automatically answered with "I'm sorry sir, I can't give out my personal information because this call is being recorded" to which some would insist since I have their number might as well drop them a message myself since I can't give them my number.
Maybe it's because of my voice, my clients thought I'm still young but when I tell them that I'm already 36 they are really surprised, some even thought they were talking to a kid. I can't forget this one client that I've called, our call lasted for 20 minutes which was supposed to be just 3 to 5 minutes at the most. He was so hard to shake off, and it was rude to end our call just like that that's why I can't click on the end button. Same as the others who were trying to get my contact number but he was so persistent im fishing out my personal information in a subtle manner. I just told him that I have already wrote down his office number and told him that I would give him a call after I'm done with my shift. But of course I didn't call him. After our conversation, our QA walked over to my station, laughing because he was listening to my call at that time. And he relayed what happened to everybody on the floor and we all had a good laugh because of that incident.
But there are also some days that we have a batch of applications wherein there are only few numbers we can get through. We all love this kind of days, phones were just either be ringing, busy tone or number not available. It's a day for us to relax and can have a chitchat while doing our work.
*Fun at work and after work*
Before our day start in our office, we do this pre-shift meeting which sometimes last for 30 minutes to an hour. In here, our boss gives us an update of our production, giving announcements and sometimes we play games with cash as prizes. My favorite is the logic game where I'm really good at, my team always win this game, we saved up enough for a team night out. We also have bingo games but I only won here once and I have to share the prize with somebody else.
And sometimes when its a payday, we treat ourselves and have some drink in a nearby resto-bar or hang out in Metrowalk which is only near our office. Or maybe go over to any of our houses and buy some drinks and snacks and food to eat before drinking. We go home early next morning. But there are a few times that I go home at 2 am or 3 am, that's when I missed the place I should get off the jeep and walk back alone in the middle of the street and in the darkness. But I don't feel scared walking like that, maybe because of the alcohol in my body.
Then, there's our team building, my most favorite event. This is where we go to far away places where we can relax. A beach resort or a private pool is always our venue. I love it when we hold it in a beach resort, I love the sea, the smell of the sea water and the fresh air and the sight of mother nature my eyes feast upon. We have a complete meal here all for free, breakfast is already waiting for us when we arrive in the venue, we get to eat after we have settled in our assigned rooms. After eating we can roam around and have a swim and enjoy the sea, the fresh air and the sight of mother nature which I feast my eyes on. After we had lunch we get to have a nap for a few minutes or have a swim again then the games begin. Of course there are cash prizes too so every team did their best to win and get some extra money to take home. This goes on until the sun goes down and the liqours were served. With meat, chicken and hotdogs cooking away in grills. It's alright to get drunk a little bit, it is our time to recharge and this is our employers way of thanking us for our hard work. All these are for free.
***Rewards and incentives***
In our work, our employers gives out rewards and incentives when we reach or exceed our qoutas. There are weekly and monthly incentives, we get cash rewards for this. It is based on our productions.
Top agents are treated to a movie or a lunch out to a nice restaurant or a night out with the bosses. This is their way to motivate us to be more productive in our work. And this certainly works. Sometimes our lunch out is in a buffet where we can eat all we can. And we go back to the office so full and happy.
They also give cash incentives based on our attendance. If you have a perfect attendance you get to receive a thousand pesos in cash. Cash incentives are also given to those with two abscences but with no lates.
These are some of my most memorable moments during my 6 years of working in a bpo company. And I miss working again but my kids won't allow me to go back to work. That's why now I am just here at home and be incharge of the household chores. But they give me money for our needs and some for my personal use.
That's it for now....thanks for taking time to read my new article. I know it's been awhile since my last one, been busy with some things here at home. I will try my best to write another one soon. ☺️🤗
Can I Have Some Rest and Fun?
It's been a busy week. Lots of things to be done. Lots of things needed to be attended upon.
From the moment I open my eyes every morning up to the time before I can get my well deserved rest at night....things are lined up under my nose. Seems like my tasks at home are endless, just thinking about them makes me tired already.
Aside from doing these household chores, I also have my online work that I need to squeeze in between my cooking, cleaning, helping my youngest with his modules and watching our ongoing kdrama, which is "Mr. Queen"....that I have watch with my Mom because she wants me to watch it with her. It's her fave past time now to keep away boredom. So I was like crazy typing captchas while watching coz I need to read the captions for it was not dubbed in English.
Life goes on like this for me every single day. Making it somewhat dull, at least for me. Maybe doing these things over and over again day by day is what makes me become tired easily. Feels like I'm getting sick even though I'm not.
Sometimes or most of the time ( I think ) I feel sad, there are nights that I would like to cry but I can't. Making my heart feel heavy. But there are times while I'm watching tv or videos on Facebook or You Tube, specially when it was a touching scene, I can't help crying. Tears would start to fall, and then I'd r crying my eyes out. Sad scenes, heart-warming scenes, happy scenes always make me cry. Even in my sleep, when I have a dream wherein I was crying, when I wake up tears are still falling from my eyes. But I can't remember why I cried in my dream. Someone said maybe it's because subconciously, I am really sad but can't let go of what I feel deep inside of me. That I am holding back or hiding what I really feel.
Maybe I just need to go out and have some fun and relax for a bit. It's been so long ago since I last got out with my friends. Since the start of the pandemic I just stayed at home and just go out when I have to buy something in the mall then going home again immediately after buying what needs to be bought. I don't stay for long hours like before, after I'm done buying the groceries, I'll just leave the bags in the package counter then I'll go around the mall, window shopping or eat in my favorite restaurant or fastfood stores. Or sometimes my friend would send me a message saying she'll treat me to a movie and then we'll eat out afterwards. And then after eating, we'll walk around the mall, talking about what we've been doing or sharing our love stories. And then we'll have a drink in our favorite drinking spot near the mall. Have a couple of bottles of drink and lots of finger-foods to go with our drinks. Best feeling ever, singing while drinking....these things I really do miss a lot.
*I really really do wish that I can do all these things again. I miss going out and have some fun with my friends. I hope everything will go back to the way they used to be.*
*Editor's note:*
*Lead image taken from Unsplash*
A Tribute to Our Moms
A post in a group I'm in made me write this article. It caught my interest because it is so on point, a very accurate hit. Below is the image that caught my attention.
**This post was made last Mother's Day.....showing how two kids had to hire several people to fill in for their mother's role while she is away for a brief holiday.**
Funny but this is so true. A mother has different roles in our house and in our lives. And not all appreciates their hard work and patience. As shown in the image, kids hired a housemaid, a driver, a chef, a nurse, a teacher, a fortune teller, a clown and a priest. All this people rolled into one is a Mom.
***Housemaid***
A mother always keep the neat and clean. From the inside to the outside. She sweeps the floor of the whole house, bedroom, dining room and living room, making sure no trash is in sight. Dust are wiped off from the appliances, electric fans are regularly cleaned, bathroom is given a daily scrub to make it squeky clean. Dirty clothes are washed twice a week ( not daily to save on water and electricity because I'm using a washer and a dryer. ) She keeps checking if there are enough stock of the groceries in the pantry and make a list so she won't forget when she goes to the supermarket.
***Driver***
A mother also serves as the family's driver. She drops the school to their school in the morning then picks them up again later in the afternoon after their classes to make sure kids are safe and sometimes takes sometime to talk with the kids' teacher to check if they are doing well in school. And then maybe drives the husband to his work if needed. Or drives her kids to anywhere they have to go to make sure they arrive safely.
***Chef***
Who else cooks for the family.....no one does this better than a mom. She always make sure there is food on the table when the kids got home from the school and the husband from his work. She is not only whipping up delicious foods for the family but she also makes sure that what goes in her family's body is nutritious. But of course she lets them have a snack of their choice as a treat. A mom cooks dishes with love that's why it always tastes delicious.
***Nurse***
This role is the one mothers are not very fond of. No mother would be happy to see any of her kids get sick. But of course, kids get sick once in a while. So when this happens, the nurse inside a mom is activated automatically. She has different kinds of medicine in stock in case of emergency. There is some paracetamol for fever, painkillers for headache and toothache, menthol ointment for insect bites or headaches too, medicine for colds and cough. But of course, just like what they always say in television ads....if symptoms persist, consult a doctor, a mom knows when to self medicate and when a real doctor is needed.
***Teacher***
All of us know that our mothers are our first teacher. They are the ones who taught us our first words, helped us to make our very first steps until we learned how to walk and eventually, run. At home, moms taught us the alphabet and the numbers. She taught us how to draw and write our first letters and alphabet and taught us how to read basic words until we are old enough to go to school. And even if we are already in school with real teachers, she still helps us with our homework and other lessons.
***Fortune teller***
Remember how our moms say when we are playing, "Don't run, you'll trip and hurt yourself" and then it just happened? It' like they can see the future hahaha That's why trust your mom's words whenever she warns you of something. Whether be it's about people we're going with or a place we're going to. She also thinks ahead above everyone else, she has everything planned to avoid any trouble.
***Clown***
Our moms sometimes keeps us enteratained, accidentally or on purpose. She sometimes do things unaware that she is being funny or she has no idea that what's doing is causing us to laugh. But most of the time she really clowns around with her kids to share that loving bond between a mom and her kids. And at times when her kids are down, she's always there to make them laugh and of course, give them advice on what to do and how to cope up with what's troubling them.
***Priest***
Yup, moms are like priests too. Giving us sermon on what os right and what is wrong. She always tell us to do good to others and live a righteous life. She taught us how to pray and goes to church with the whole family. And tells us to always give thanks for all the blessings that are given to us and ask or guidance in our everyday lives and pray for forgiveness for all wrongs we have done.
***And that's what a Mom can do and will do for her kids and the whole family. So give all the love and respect to our Moms. She gets tired and stressed out but she never shows it to her kids. She pretends that she's okay but that's the opposite. Working around the clock at home isn't easy, believe me, because I'm a mom too.*** 😉☺️
Just About Anything
*I really don't know what to write about today. I've been staring at this blank space under the "Add a title..." And my mind goes..."I have no topic yet...let alone a title." But anyways...I'll just put down whatever comes to my mind and there are a few random things running through my mind.*
February 15, 2022....marks my father's 6th death anniversary.
It has been six long years but we still miss him a lot. We'll miss the times he sing whenever we would set up our videoke here at home. His favorite songs are "Green, Green Grass of Home", "Delilah", and other songs from the 50's and 60's.
He likes it whenever I cook pork and chicken adobo, specially when it has chicken liver too. He says that it tastes the same as my Great Grandmother's adobo. It's from her that I learned how to cook. Even my Dad's favorite dessert, leche flan and ubeng haleya, these two he always request whenever he got his pension. He gives money to buy the needed ingredients an some extra cash for me, he said "go buy something for yourself too."
Ever since my Dad get operated on his hand and foot, I used to massage them to somewhat ease the after pains. He says my massage is much better that the painkillers the doctor has prescribed for him. So whenever at home and has free time, I always make sure to give him a massage even for just 15 to 30 minutes or until he falls asleep.
February 15, 2022....a day after Valentine's day.
As I was walking through the tiangge this morning to buy something for breakfast and also for our lunch...I heard conversations of some of the vendors there. They were comparing their sale from yesterday since it was Valentine's day. They were teasing the one who sells chocolates and cookies, they were all saying that she has the highest sale yesterday. And the other woman who's selling stuff toys and heart shaped cushions said that she almost sold out everything yesterday, only two pieces were left. I'm glad hearing these things from them, it means that they get to bring home more money than they usually do.
I thought since Valentine's day is over, my newsfeed would be free from posts made by some friends and acquantances about yesterday. But noooooo, I was so so wrong hahaha I have forgotten about post-Valentine posts. So again, just like yesterday, my newsfeed is still full of dates and gifts. I was happy for them and at the same time, I envy them.
I've always wanted to get something special from someone, but I never did. Seems like I don't deserve to be given special things on special days like this one. Yes, I did get some gifts from husband when he was still alive. But I can't feel any sincerity when he gives me gift. It seems like, he buys me gifts for the sake of just to give something to me. We also never go out on dates like other couples do.
Lost in my own thoughts
I just want to be happy but seems like the happiness I really want is so far from happening. I treasure the joy being with my kids and my family. But it is very much different from the joy of being with someone you love and of someone who loves you in return. I can't help thinking if I don't deserve to have that kind of happiness, it's so elusive.
Everytime I feel that I have found my happiness, something happens and then that's the end of it. Tough luck. What I thought would last forever or even for a long time, always end up with goodbyes.
I feel like there is something wrong with me. Am I not worth the love of someone? Am I not worth spending one's time with? Lots of questions run through my head and my heart. Am I not the type of person who can have a stable relationship like everyone I know?
Seems like everyone around me is now happy with their partners. Even my son's Godmother is now having a wonderful life with her husband. They used to fight a lot way back then, I honestly thought their going to get separated. But now, even she has received surprise gifts from her husband yesterday after she went home from their store. But I'm really glad that they are doing okay now, I am happy for them.
And today being the 15th of the month, is the day for paying bills, and I almost forgot about it hahaha It's a good thing my two older kids have work now, they are the one's shouldering the water and electricity bills. And they both give me money for buying our basic neccessities here at home. I can now buy our toiletries such as shampoo, bath soap, deodorant, detergents and other stuff. Because my Mom bought these things for us, back when my kids have no jobs yet.
*So, that will be all for now. I got to go and cash in the amount in my E-wallet so I can pay the bills later on. Hope you guys have a nice day today and I hope you're not bored with what I have shared with you today. Thanks everyone.*
All About Zombies
Zombies.....is a mythological undead corporeal revenant created through the reanimation of a corpse.....as defined by the all knowing Google. In short, a dead person refusing to be dead lol or a living dead in plain language.
We're on our 8th episode of a Korean Netflix series entitled "All of Us Are Dead".....this gave me an idea for my next article. In this series the virus was created by a science professor-scientist for his son who's always getting bullied in his school, same school he is teaching, so he can fight back the bullies. But everything went wrong when the rat he is using for testing bit one of his students and that began the spread of the virus.
*The evolution of zombies*
The first zombies ( in movies, of course 😁 ) move very slow. One can easily escape a zombie attack by just running fast, going around or just by simply dodging their attacks. They can't run fast and they too sleep at night. They are attracted to light and with even the slightest sound or sudden movements. They can't open doors or climb the stairs or anything elevated, so you just have to secure a high safe place and lock yourselves in. Zombies before are just after the brains of a living person, they just go straight for the brains and then hunt again for another person's brain to feast on. These zombies were from the cemetery that was intoxicated by a chemical oozing with radiation thus making them rise again from their grave in search of food....which is the brain.
*I'm okay with this kind of zombie.....slow moving, can't open doors and can't climb either. And it only takes a headshot to kill them and then they stay dead.*
And then after a few movies....some changes took place. They are still slow moving but they are now more intelligent. Yes, these type of zombie can think, they can communicate with each other and can even arm themselves to fight the living. Amazing isn't it.....but scary, imagine a zombie holding a gun right up to your face or swinging an axe to cut through your skull to get your brain.
*Just imagining these makes me shiver and my tummy aches as the scene plays in my imagination.*
The next type of zombie and the scariest one is the one who could run, fast....I mean really fast....and can now climb but still can't open doors. One will panic if you see zombies running towards you so fast, as if they've got boosters that give them the ability to run that fast. And while running, they are still making these eerie sounds like they are gurgling blood and growling at the same time. They can still be killed by a shot in the head or just hit them on the head and they'll be dead again, permanently.
*I think I'll be among the first ones who'd die if this kind of zombies exist. Just seeing them run that fast would make me freeze with panic hahaha*
And in this one movie, which I guess most of us has already seen or maybe familiar with this movie, The Warm Bodies. They have shown two different types of zombies here. The first one is the kind that can still think like a normal living person and the other is called the bonies....which is the bad zombies.
The first one though they attack people and feast on their flesh not only the brain, they are still aware of what's happening and can still think straight. And they are the kind that can be reversed back to being alive again just by being loved and taken care of the living. They can be normal again.
The opposite goes with the bonies. These zombies are hopeless, they can't go back to being alive and normal again. Maybe because they are so bad that their hearts can't be warmed by affection.
*I definitely want this kind of zombie, I mean the ones that can be human again not the hopeless bonies. I'd volunteer to help restore their life again, that would be so wonderful.*
**What to do if there are zombies**
I've been thinking about what to do if there are real zombies when I watch zombie movies.
What steps or preparations should I do?
Well, of course, first I have to have a proper weapon to fight and kill zombies. High powered guns with lots and lots of ammunitions is definitely in my list. Bladed weapons or sharp weapons is also good, as long as it can cut or pierce through flesh or skull.
Next is food and water, of course we all need these two to survive and have the strength to fight off the zombies. You can't fight in an empty stomach. You'd die from hunger and thirst if the zombies doesn't kill you first hahaha
And of course, a safe place to hide. A place no zombie can come close or a place they can penetrate. A house or building with strong and high walls and gates so the zombies can't climb over and eat us all. Or a place that has a rooftop so I can see what's going on around the place. And also kill zombies from an advantage point. Just give them a headshot until rescuers arrive, if there are rescuers hahaha
Oh my gosh hahaha watching zombie movies has gotten my imagination again. That's all for now guys. I just want to get off these things from my mind that's why I made this article. I hope you have fun reading this one. Thank you everyone and keep safe.....you'll never know if there are real zombies. 😉
Gifts from the Heart and Pockets
Yey!!! Valentine's day is just around the corner.....have you think about what you'll give to your love ones? Well, here are some ideas that might help you 😉
My social media account's newsfeed is now flooded with Valentine's day post. Memes, shot and long love messages posts by the people who are so much inlove and bitter but funny posts from people who are not so happy with the idea of that special day hahaha
And of course, dominating my newsfeed are posts advertising and promoting different gift ideas. From the cheapest but practical and with the same thoughts to the most expensive gifts a person can buy.
***Let's start off first with the most expensive down to the cheapest gifts.***
A bouquet of money in bills
I'd certainly be jumping for joy and crying my heart out if I get to receive this kind of gift. But that is sooooo far from reality hahaha no one will spend this much on me.
Beautyfully arranged in a bouquet are blue bills (thousand peso bills) carefully rolled up to look like a rose. Some bouquet have real flowers and/or chocolates mixed with the blue bills making it much more expensive. Then wrapped with special decorative gift wraps and tied with lovely ribbons and of course a special hand-written love letter.
Just imagining how this one looks like makes me want to receive this kind of gift....but I know I'm not the only one. Who wouldn't want this one? 😁
A set of jewelries
Another expensive gift for a beloved. Some man buys their wives or girlfriends a ring or a necklace as a gift. Many stores, be it an online or a physical store, offers a wide varieties of jewelries to choose from. They've got gold and silver plated to 24 karat piece. Some are sold in sets.....ring, necklace, bracelet and earrings. But of course, one can also choose any one of these. With different designs....with gems or stones to just a simple band.
For the young ones, they have these customized jewelries, like you can engrave a name or pictures in a locket, or zodiac signs and even birth stones. Some gents buy couple rings or bracelets or necklaces, with a lock and key designs or two halves of a heart with their names on each half. Kinda sweet 🥰
Wrist watches are also available, with gem studded face and bracelet or just plain and simple leather or silver or gold bracelet. You can even request for a name or a small note to be engraved at the back of the watch.
Stuffed toys and chocolates
Some girls are very fond of stuffed toys and chocolates. There are different sizes and different kinds of stuffed toys, from the most loved teddy bear to the different characters one can imagine, like a cat, puppy, bunny or even a pig haha and of course there are these Disney Characters like Mickey and Minnie Mouse. There are different sizes too, to the life-sized down to the cute-sized teddies.
These can be matched with some chocolates too, it may be a chocolate bar or chocolates in a box which are way more expensive ( and much more delicious too 😍😋 ). I know I'd be very happy to have a teddy and a chocolate ( both big in size hahaha ) And by the way these two can also be arranged in a bouquet style too.
A special date in a very special place
But of course, you can still make a love one feel very special and happy on this day by just taking her or him ( yes, him....because we ladies also love to give gifts to our man 😉 ) to a special place and have a special dinner. Or just stay at home and prepare or cook something special or order from an online food delivery service.
Maybe watch a movie you both like to see and have lots of snacks and drinks to enjoy while watching and just enjoy being with each other company.....for the whole day ( and even the night ).
Or maybe go to the mall and eat at any restaurant or your favorite fastfood store. And then just have a walk inside the mall or you can even go the theater or play games in the amusement center.....hmm that is sure fun to do.
And those were some of the gift ideas for a loved one that will surely make her/him special and cherished. I hope my article has somewhat helped you guys in a way. 😉☺️
Writer's note: photos are not mine....just saw them on a social media and lead image is from unsplash
Half A Decade of Existence
**Every night as I lay on my bed.....I always think and assess myself if I have been living my life the way I should or the way I wanted it to be.**
Last January, I have celebrated my 50th year in this world. And in those 50 years of breathing, living, interacting, learning and co-existing with other people I have met along the road I travelled on, I have created many memories and had some good and bad experiences as well.
Growing up as a kid, I made some friends in our neighborhood. Including my bestfriend up until today, whom I met the 2nd day we moved in to our new home. I saw her from across the street, she just stared at me and then stuck out her tounge at me hahaha I was surprised at that gesture of her but I just smiled back at her and she turned around and went inside their house. But as days go by, we get a little bit closer with each other, with me always doing the first move. I often approached her and coach her into some little talks, until we became the best of buddies. My efforts were not wasted hehe we were inseparable. Yes, we played with the other kids but we don't play without the other, like we're a package deal, we should be both playing with the neighborhood kids.
When it was time for my family to move out of our rented apartment, I cried everynight because I'll be leaving the place and people I grew up with. I feel like a tree having to be uprooted from its place. I'll be leaving my comfort zone and my friends behind. Me and my bestfriend cried when I made my final goodbye because we both know that we'll not gonna see each other for a very very long time. And yes, we have not seen her only after 20 years of being apart. We both have our own families but it feels like we've just parted a few weeks only. Nothing has changed, we only look much older but still kids at heart. Proving that bestfriends will remain bestfriends even if you're a thousand miles away.
***During my school days, I have lots of memories and experiences to look back to.***
Meeting new faces and building up new friendships with people who saw through my snobbish appearance hahaha Most of my schoolmates saw me as the snob and quite and studious type. Little did they know that I am friendly but shy type of a person. So those who has successfully broken the barrier became my best buddies. They were surprised that I can talk more than 2 sentences and that I can joke around too. But for me, being around the right people makes me feel comfortable that I can open up and be myself.
Highschool days are most fun because I get to go at parties and dance my heart out. I really love to attend parties be it at the school or at a relatives place when there is a town fiesta and girls from Manila were treated special. It's in a party that I met my first boyfriend hehe he was introduced by a cousin of mine. And after that night, he started courting me by sending love letters through mail. Yes, mail because there is no cellphones yet way back then. So we just write letters and dropped them in the mailbox and wait for about a week or 2 before it reaches its destination.
Joining school field trips are fun too. I get to go to far away places with just my classmates and teachers, no parents tagging along. Taking pictures and having fun with my peers. With this, I am very gratefull to my parents, eventhough they're earning just enough for the family, they still provided my fee for the field trip and my foods, snacks and drinks and of course, film for the camera so I could take pictures with my classmates.
***Having a family of my at a very young age was very challenging and full of trials and hardships.***
I got married at 18.....very young I know. Maybe I thought it was love or maybe it was, not so sure. To be honest, as I think and look back now, I can only recall a very very few happy moments during our marriage, it feels like 90% of it can be best described as living in hell. I suffered a lot in this relationship. I've been a prisoner of a misconception about family. Growing up in a Catholic family, my idea of a family is having a father and a mother with their kids under one roof, keeping the family whole no matter what happens.
I have learned too late that it is okay not to have a father within the family. And I also learned that I can stand on my own and support my kids even without my husband. It was very wrong to keep saving the marriage if the other half keeps on hurting the other half, mentally, emotionally and eventually....physically.
But also.....something good has come out of that marriage. I have my kids, who fortunately doesn't take after their father's attitude and personality. All of them grew up to be good children, looking after one another, supporting each other and loving one another. They are my treasure and I don't want to leave them to soon in this life. They still need me for guidance and support. I can't imagine leaving them, just thinking about it breaks my heart.
So that was it.....I know it's not much but I just want to share with you my past experiences in life. And I really do hope that you have learned something from what I have written here. Thanks so much for reading.....til my next article.....bye for now and keep safe always 🤗☺️🥰
A Little Bit of Reminiscing
Eight days before Valentine's day. Does everybody already has plans for this special day, either with a special someone or with the family? And as always, during this season I am remided of a person who has been a special part of my life.
Well, it's not only on the 14th of February we can celebrate Valentine's day. We can make it everyday or whenever we want. This is what someone special once told me before. And yup, he was right. Everytime we were together, it always seems Valentine's day for us.
We met through a common friend ( well, not really a friend of mine...much more of somone I know because he lives not very far from my grandma's house), way back on our highschool days. We're both on our 3rd year, I was on the higher section and he was on the lower section. My neighbor said his friend saw me pass by while they were together and insisted the he introduce him to me.
So one day, as I was about to enter our school's gate, I heard my name called out loudly making the other students stop and turn and look around trying to find out who was being called in such a loud voice. So embarassing hahaha well anyways.....introductions were made. And he started courting me, after 3 months we became a couple. But it was a short-lived relationship, with me discovering that he's cheating on me, with some hints from his friends. The last day that we had a short talk was on our graduation day....and that was also the last day that we saw each other.
Another shot at love or shall I say "love is sweeter the second time around.
Days, weeks, months and years passed by....I got married to man I thought I loved which didn't go quite well which ended to us parting our ways and finally leaving me a widow....but that was another story which I will also share with you in the future.
So a year after my husband died, Dennis (not his real name) started chatting with me and dropping hints about us being together again. We're friends on facebook so I also know what's going on in his life too like he does with mine. He and his wife has been separated for more than 2 years already.
To make the story short, we decided to give our love another chance. We agreed to go out on a date on my birthday. First time to see each other again after 30 years. And yes, my heart skipped a beat and then started beating faster as I saw him waiting for me. And I know he felt that way too. I saw it in his eyes, the way he stared at me as I approach him and him whispering "you still look beautiful."
It felt like my heart will explode with happiness while we were walking holding hands while looking for a nice place to eat lunch. After our lunch, we went to see a movie, but we just did some more catching up with what happened to our lives, our what ifs. And before going home, he bought me a cake to bring home to the kids and celebrate my birthday.
Since then, we go out every week. Eating out or watching a movie. With him giving me small kisses or hugging me even with other people around, like when we are waiting for our orders or while waiting in line in the cinema, or even while on the escalator hahaha he's really such a sweet man. I can't take off the smile on my lips all the time that we're together. And that he noticed and asked me why I always have that smile. I answered him...."my lips do that automatically when I'm with you because that's my heart's way of showing that she's happy."
Not all good things last....a sad truth.
Unfortunately, everything has to end, slowly. There came a time that he didn't come to see me. He just called me up and said he has something important to do. And after 2 weeks of stalling he finally confessed that he lost his job but he's gonna apply for a new one. He said that I should wait for him and I said of course I would. At first he still call me everyday just like he used to do. And then it became days before he would call again, then weeks, until he stopped calling. I wasn't surprised that that happened, I think I've been expecting it the whole time after loosing his job.
But every now and then he still drops me a message. Christmas and new year greetings. He also sent me a birthday greetings through messenger. We get to chat for awhile, and that's when I learned that he is sick. He's got tuberculosis and he's on his 4th month of medication which will end on March. He said his kids are taking care of him, he also said that he got thinner because of this. And he need to get some fattening up to get back to his old built. And he still calls me with our usual endearment. Still made my heart flutter ☺️🥰
Well, anyway.....I hope and pray that he would get better and be completely cured. After all, I loved him with all my heart and I still carry with me all the sweet and happy moments we've shared together. I can't remember having any dull time with him.
Thank you @Codename_Chikakiku for being my sponsor again ☺️ I will try my very best to come up with a worthwhile reading article regularly. Been busy these past few days that's why I wasn't active in here for quite sometime. So again....thank you so much 🥰
My Internet Love
I have already shared with you my infamous love story in one of my previous article which is entitled "Finding Love on the Internet." Here's the link in case you have not read it yet 👇👇👇
https://read.cash/@SimplyMe/finding-love-on-the-internet-041cf0da
So here's the story now.
On the 10th of March.....we're gonna be celebrating our 2nd year in this "relationship." And surprise surprise.....we still have not yet seen each other in personal.
May I ask you all.....is that normal? Like, yes we're in a LDR kind of a relationship. BUT again.....he's just lives in a nearby city.....like it was just take a few rides to get here. I really can't believe that we've come this far without seeing each other face to face.
Different reasons kept coming up every time we set a date to finally meet and be together even for just a day. First.....the lockdown, this reason I can understand because even I can't get anywhere then. He can't go to work so he has used up his savings and we have no enough money to spend.
Second try.....his mother got hospitalized. He is the only one living with his mother so the caring for her falls on his shoulders. I perfectly understand this, had this happened to me I'd set aside everything to take care of my Mom.
Third.....his brother needs to go under swab testing because one of his colleauges was tested positive with covid 19. He sent some money to his brother to support his family's basic need because he needs to be quarantined for 14 days thus failing to report for work.
Fourth attempt.....he bought a new cellphone. It's because it keeps on shutting down while he was using it. He can't have a decent conversation with me because of this, making him frustrated and irritable. That's how he is when he can't chat with me or can't call me.
Having so many failed attempts to have a simple date made me somewhat tired of expecting when will the time come for us.
After these, I just let everything slide. I don't expect anymore....really or was I just convincing myself that it's alright of we still have not seen each other. After all we always chat or do video calls regularly, thinking these are enough for now.
But he does not bring up the subject of us pushing through our meet up plans. And when I do, he always say that he still has not enough money and he still needs to save up for our "special day." I already told him before that we don't need spend too much money, just a simple date with him is more than enough for me. Seeing him, touching him and hugging him is what I really needed.....to assure myself, to confirm to myself that what we have is real and not just a thing on the net. I hope you guys understand what I am trying to say. Is it just me or I have all the to right to feel this way?
Sometimes I feel like I am not that important or I think that he does not love me that much to not exert effort to find a way to come and see me. These thoughts make my heart ache, I feel like it was tearing up inside of me. Making me want to cry at night or at any time that I think about it.
Actually he has made a promise to me last year.....he said that we will meet before Christmas or before my birthday. But Christmas has passed and so is my birthday.....I think he has forgotten all about it. I didn't mention or remind him of his promises, his alibis will just hurt me even more.
Earlier this afternoon, I asked him how to get to his place. He said by bus, jeep and tricycle. And then I asked again.....where would I take the bus, the jeep and the tricycle. He just laughed at me and said that HE will come to me and not the other way around. And then he jokingly asked that am I being desperate? I wanna yell YES to his face but I can't. Hell, I just wanna be with him for a day, that's all I'm asking for.
*But even if the day for us is not yet in the near future, I am still willing to wait. I hope my heart will never get tired of waiting. I hope he also feels the same way like I do.*
Missing Him
12 more days....it's going to be 6 years since the first ever man who truly loved me unconditionally passed away. And I miss him every minute of every single day.
I can still remember the day that he took me and my younger brother out to watch a movie. It was my first time to enter a cinema, we bought popcorns and soda so we can something to munch on while enjoying the movie. We were watching Superman at that time. And then before going home, we stopped by at Savory to buy chicken for Mom.
He was the one who made me watch Sesame Street everyday, so I can learn how to speak and understand English.....which I think really paid off because I can speak the English language even before they have enrolled me in kindergarden. And he always insists that I watch English movies and shows, read books and magazines with English context too, to further enhance my knowledge about the language.
While growing up, I used to wait for him at night when he comes home from work. I was the one who opens the door for him and then make him his coffee while he eats his dinner with Mom. And every now and then, he has something for me....my most favorite is this hotdog sandwich with lots of mayo and cheese which I joyfully eats before I sleep. Or save it for the morning if I'm too sleepy to eat it.
He has this disease....a very rare disease. In fact we didn't even know it exists until he was diagnosed to be infected with it. It is called "Buerger's disease".....according to google this is also known as **thromboangiitis obliterans** and it affects blood vessels in the body, most commonly in the arms and legs. Blood vessels swell, which can prevent blood flow, causing clots to form. This can lead to pain, tissue damage, and even gangrene (the death or decay of body tissues. This is caused by smoking cigarettes or any tobacco products.
He was a smoker, he smokes a lot and sometimes that's what causes the small fights between him and Mom. They noticed that the tips of his fingers and toes were slowly turning black. So they went to a doctor to have it checked. And that was the doctor's findings. He was adviced to stop smoking and prescribed him some medicines to prevent the disease from spreading. But eventually, he's got operated on, they cut off three of his fingers and two of his toes. After his operation, I always tenderly massage his hand and feet to ease the pain from the disease and operation.
And not long after that operation.....he was again rushed to the hospital by his colleauges. He had a stroke.
I was shocked and almost fainted when I got a call from my sister that our Dad was in the hospital unconcious. It was my daughter's graduation day (kindergarden)....so right after the ceremony, we took a cab and went to our grandma's house where they were staying at that time. We almost lost him that night, his blood pressure dropped to zero and so is his heartbeat. But thanks God, the doctors were able to revive him. And after more than a month, we were able to bring him home. But the doctor said that he needs an operation, one of his veins is clogged and needed to be treated and we need to raise about 100,000+ pesos for the operation. But he can't guarantee that it would be successful. And also said that we just need to prepare ourselves to whatever happens if worse comes to worst.....meaning we can loose him in a matter of a couple of years.
He became irritable and hard headed at times but it's quite alright. He still takes the kids out and buys them what they want. They eat out a lot, and go to different places they have never been to before.
He always plans for a family outing, one time we went to Batangas and Tagaytay for an overnight stay in a beach resort. We had so much fun there, with all the food that we have with us and the beautiful beach....it was the best overnight ever.
At home, he always want to watch movies and have some pizza for everybody. And sometimes he asks me to cook spaghetti or carbonara from out of the blue.....saying he missed my cooking. And whenever I go out or anyone of us is going to the mall, he always say to buy him a pizza before we come home. It was his favorite pasalubong from us. So whenever I got my pay from work, I stop by at a pizza parlor so I can buy some for him and the family too.
The morning after Valentine's day, my daughter woke me up saying that she got a message from her sister who's staying with Mom and Dad at that time together with his two brothers.
I didn't know what to do when my daughter said these words...."Mama....si Daddy....."I felt my heart stopped beating and then started to beat so fast that I felt it would explode at that moment. We hurriedly fixed ourselves so we can go over the house as fast as we could. The tricycle has barely stopped before I jumped off and ran towards our house. When I reached the gates, I asked them what happened to Dad, they just pointed towards the room, when I got there I saw my Dad. My youngest brother still by his side and crying. He just looked at me and said that...."Daddy is gone....he left us."
I rushed to my Daddy's side, gave him a shake so he would wake up, calling out to him so he can hear me and open his eyes. I know I was crying hysterically at that time, I am refusing the fact that he's truly gone. But when I tried to listen to his heartbeat, thinking that maybe he is still alive and he just went into a coma, I can't feel nor hear anything, not even a faint beat. The doctor who came just a few minutes after we have arrived confirmed his passing.
Years has passed but the pain still remains in my heart. The pain and regret that I didn't even get the chance to talk with him before he was gone. We didn't get the chance to hug him one last time before he left us. But I know he's already happy wherever he is now. No more pain....only happiness.
I MISS YOU DADDY.....
New Year's Resolution.....What?
I think some of us still have this New Year's Resolution thing whenever we welcome the incoming year.
Some might include in their list that starting the new year, they would definitely go on a diet and have a regular workout. But not me, because I really find it hard to control myself from eating specially when what's served in front of me is something that I have been craving for for a very long time. I wouldn't have second thoughts on having 2nd helpings of that food. For me, diet is not a method of depriving yourself of not eating what you want. It's more on eating what you like in moderation, everything is good as long as you don't too much of everything.
As for the regular work out thing, I don't go to gyms to have a planned excercises that they offer. Or do execises using cellphone apps like my daughters do. I get my daily dose of exercise whenever I walk every morning on my way to the marketplace, which is about more than 8 blocks away from our house. I think that is more than 3 kilometers of brisk walking, and another 3 kilometers going home but with some weights this time because of the things that I bought, I guess it's about 4 kilos on the average.
Others said they will start saving up money. Well, I might try this one, because I need to save some so I can buy somethings for my kids. I have my "alkansya" or piggy bank already but it's still empty as of this time. But I will start depositing when my kids who are now working give me some spending money for our basic needs. Actually, I already have some savings, but not in cash, I have them in my ewallets like my Gcash, Coins.ph and Paypal. Not much but I have some to start up with.
Forgive and forget. Hmm forgiving I can definitely do but forgetting will be I bit difficult. Because I'm that type of person who don't easily forgets. I may forgive a person for what he or she has done to me but I will surely never forget what has been done to me. At least I grant forgiveness.
New year new me?
This one is my main goal, thought I would focus on myself this year. Lately I've been doing things for the whole family. Been attending to their needs and doing chores around the house. I don't get to go out and have some time for myself. I buy things my kids needs and barely getting anything for myself. So this time around, I want to splurge a little to reward myself for all the work I have been doing for others.
Maybe buy a couple of dress or shoes or sandals that I already have in my cart in shopee or lazada. Indulge in foods that I have been craving for for a long time now, like mango graham cake or cakes from famous bakeshops like Contis and Mary Grace. And maybe get some baking tools so I can start my journey in baking like I've always wanted. Got to use an improvised oven for now because I still have to save some to buy an oven.
And maybe go out and travel to places I haven't been yet. There are so many places in my travel list but I never get to go to anywhere ever since the pandemic started. And I hope I can visit all these places one day.
How about you guys? Do have your new year's resolution?
Not A Good Start
In my bed.....down with fever, cough and cold. In short.....I got the flu.
That is how I welcomed 2022. I have a slight fever 2 days before the year ends. And when I woke up the next morning, I felt a bit better so I proceeded to continue with my usual duties. Got up and got dressed as early as 5 am to buy what is needed in preparing for the New Year's Eve celebration.
I bought two kilos of prime beef which costs about $10 per kilo, which my mom cooked as "mechado". Where the beef is cut into medium sized cubes then mixed in with sautèd garlic, onions and tomates. She added some soy sauce and water, and cooked until the beef is tender.
I also bought a whole pork hind leg, and let the butcher chop it for me. This is for the "kare-kare". Cooked with some vegetables like "puso ng saging", eggplant and stringbeans. To give it the unique flavor, finely ground peanut is added to the broth. And as for the dip, which makes this dish complete, mom has cooked "bagoong alamang" or shrimp paste.
For dessert, I prepared a day ahead my specialty......leche flan and some fruit salad. Which I put in a cooler with lots of ice so it will be more delicious when served.
I thought I was already done with my fever.....but no, it just gave me a little bit of time to help mom with some part of the prep.
After having bought all what is needed, me and my daughter decided to ride a tricycle so we don't have to carry all these things walking. We each carry 3 big plastic bags of groceries. Upon arriving home, I immediately prepared everything so mom will just have to cook them.
Done with all the prep, I decided to lay down to rest. That's when I started to feel my fever rising up again. Then I started feeling cold and my throat begins to get itchy. I feel asleep, and by the time I woke up, I am sooooo hot. My kids bought me some medicines and pineapple juices in can. They made me drink my meds so I can be better by the time we have to welcome the new year.
But, I still didn't get better. I stayed in bed because I really can't get up. My daughter just brought to me my "media noche".....2 slices of bread, hotdogs, cheese, fruit salad and a cup of hot choco.
January 1, 2022.....morning of the first day of the new year.....I still am in bed. My other siblings arrived for our celebration, each have bought different dishes and dessertas. Which I didn't get to enjoy because I can't eat and foods taste so bland. The only thing I enjoyed was the fruit salad and leche flan. I didn't get to eat the kare-kare, the mechado and the other dishes my brother and sister brought. I was really really sad that day, this is the worst New Year ever for me. Aside from not getting to enjoy the foods, I also didn't get to go outside and celebrate with the neighbors and watch the fireworks.
And finally, after 3 days of being sick, I am now feeling much much better. No more fever, taste buds active again but unfortumately......no more new year foods. Well anyway, I still have my birthday to look forward to, and that's on the 10th of this month. Just a few more days and we got another event to celebrate. I may not have started the new year right but hopefully the rest of the year will be alright, anyways we're just starting the first month and we still have a long long way to go.
Can I Mark Myself Safe on 12.12?
Hey.....I'm very proud to say I survived the 11.11 madness. **BUT.....now that it's only a few days til 12.12.....I really don't know if I can ignore this one. Specially when I checked what's in my cart today in shopee hehe**
I don't always open my shopee app, that way I can avoid the temptation to add more items in my cart. I just open it when I have to buy something I or my kids need. And when I think it's time to reward myself.
This morning, my Mom asked me to check if I the chrochet thread that she needs is already available. But it's still out of stock. So, I sneak a peek of the items in my cart for a while.
The first item are pots. As a plantita, I definitely need these pots because some of my babies are still in their seedling bags, waiting to be placed in a decent looking pot. I already bought some soil mix, pumice, vermicast, crh ( carbonized rice hull ) and pebbles for decor. And I have choosen white pots because they look more elegant than the other colors. I will change all my pots to white in the future so its more pleasing to look at. At first I was thinking of replacing them with clay pots but after checking out how much they cost....I changed my mind and added these plastic pots to my cart. They are much cheaper and yet elegant looking too. Here is the link of the shop where I buy my pots in case you might want to buy some.
https://shopee.ph/hqcollections14?smtt=0.0.9
Second item.....bedsheets and pillowcases. As I recall, the last time I bought bedsheets was last year. So I guess I really need this one. I added two sets of these bedsheet/pillowcases in single bed size. One has Hello Kitty design in red color, I've always wanted to buy this but my kids asked me to buy something else for them. But this time I'll make sure to have this one. And the other one I picked is light blue in color and have some cactus design on it. It look so cute that I immediately added it to cart without any hesitation. I just hope they still have this design available by the time I place order. You can check out the other designs here.
https://shopee.ph/ybyuyu?smtt=0.0.9
The third item.....my undies (seamless panties of course ). Whenever I shop, this will never be excluded in my list. But I just buy two pieces every time, this goes under the "rewards for myself category" hehe. I buy my undies from only one shop, the cloth is so soft and comfortable to wear, and the size fits me like a T. I feel like adding up a bra but I remembered that I still have one bra that I have not yet used, still in its packaging. I intend to use it on a special occassion hahaha I'm still searching for a dress to match it.
https://shopee.ph/rhianchua?smtt=0.0.9
Fourth item in the cart....a mini-desk organizer. This one will be my gift for my youngest daughter. She has a study table and she always make herself a DIY organizer from boxes and cartons. Covers it with colored papers or gift wrappers with pretty designs. This one that I choose is made of wood, so it would last for a very very long time. Unlike the ones that she makes, sometimes it gets so easily damaged or broken because it was only made of cartons. She was asking me to buy her this kind of organizer a long time ago, and I think this is the right time to buy her this one. If you're planning to buy an organizer too, check out their store.
https://shopee.ph/thebest.inph?smtt=0.0.9
Next is a 3-layered storage rack for our bathroom. The one we are using now is broken and I can't remove it just yet because I have no other place to put our toiletries. I still need to buy a mirror along with this rack, the one that we have inside has a mirror. But I really love the design this one have so I wanted to buy it even if it does not have a mirror. And maybe I'll buy of this so the mirror that will be placed in between these two racks. They have other products too, just visit their store.
https://shopee.ph/cjxshope?smtt=0.0.9
And I also have in my cart these Kitchen water-proof and oil-proof wall sticker. I've always wanted to buy this one. I've been intending to change how my cook-place looks like. The stove rack will get a thorough cleaning first, i'll discard all unneccessary things from the rack, bottles, pots and pans that we're not using anymore. I'll remove the old piece of leather cloth placed there by my brother, then I'll clean the wall behind the rack and maybe repaint it before I place these wall stickers. It will definitely give my cooking area a beautiful make-over. I'm gonna be more inspired while I cook for the family. They also have different designs for wall papers.
https://shopee.ph/dmhappy218?smtt=0.0.9
And last on the list is a LED growlight. It's for my cns (cactus and succulents ) babies. But I'm still thinking if I'm going to really buy this one now or save it for later because I might not use it yet. I have to buy a plant rack and set it up first before I can place this LED growlight. And my plants are outside enjoying full sunlight because the sunshine's direction is perfectly shining down on them. Maybe I'll buy this when the rainy season is near, I'll arrange my cns babies here inside so they won't get drowned from rainwater if it rains continuously for days. By the way, it's a one stop lighting store, so if you are looking for some lights you can visit their store.
https://shopee.ph/hunta.ph?smtt=0.0.9
And that's all what I have in my cart, waiting to be placed on order. BUT I really am still thinking if I am going to buy them all on 12.12. Maybe I will and maybe I won't. ☺️ How about you guys, are you going to mark yourself safe on that date?
Beginning to Feel the Christmas Season
It's a Saturday and it's a day for chilling for some of us. And we only have 35 more days to go before Christmas.....yey my most favorite time of the year.
Since Christmas is just around the corner, people have put up their lights, decors and trees. Some houses hang Christmas lanterns outside their houses, which symbolizes the star that guided the Three Kings to the newly born Jesus Christ. Whom they found in a manger, with Mary and Joseph by his side and surrounded by different farm animals.
Christmas lights are placed inside and outside the houses, some lights are star-shaped some are tree-shaped and some have elaborate designs and some lights dance to the beat of Christmas songs playing. Some lights seems like flowing water, some are twinkling fast and then slowing down before it blinks fast again. It's so wonderful watching them at night.
Here in the Philippines, we celebrate Christmas as early as the 16th of December. We always start off our celebration with our "simbang gabi", a holy mass at 4 a.m. on the 16th of December and ending on the 24th which is the Christmas Eve. It is believed that if completed your "simbang gabi" from the very beginning to the very last, your wish will come true. That's why churches are always full of mass goers.
And of course, after the mass, vendors are lined up outside the church selling "puto bumbong" and "bibingka".....the two most famous Christmas food here in our country. The season is not complete without these foods. "Puto bumbong" which is steamed grounded "pirurutong" rice is served with margarine, grated coconut and sugar on top. And "bibingka" a rice cake, has salted eggs, cheese and grated coconut on top.
On the 16th of December, children and adults too can start going around the neighborhood to go on carolling. They go from house to another house singing Christmas carols. Then the house ower gives them money as gift for them. Some do this for a cause, what they have collected from their carolling, they give to a charity which they have choosen as their beneficiary. Some buy gifts for the children in orphanages or foods for the street dwellers.
Some people do their kris kringle or exchange gifts or monita monita. Starting again on the 16th of December, they agree on what kind of gift and how much would it be. It may be something long, something soft, something sweet or anything that they could think of, setting a certain price to be fair to everyone participating, like it could be 20 to 50 pesos. And on the final day, the amount is larger of course, it could be 200 to 500 pesos. It's fun having this kind of activity, in the office or at home, with your family or friends.
Gifts are placed under the Christmas tree and ang paos are also placed hanging on the tree. You get to open yours on Christmas morning, guessing what's inside and praying that that's what you're wishing for. And hoping too that you get to pick the ang pao which has the highest amount of money.
Then there's our Noche Buena, special dishes are laid on the table, which the whole family feast upon when the clock hits 12 midnight on the 25th, signalling that it's Christmas already. Different dishes are in the table, like pasta, cake and other sweet desserts, fruits and hot choco drinks.
And on Christmas morning, the whole family now goes to church to attend the Holy Mass. And after mass, kids are brought by their parents to their godparents' houses to greet them and in return they give gifts to their grandchildren. Some give money while some give gifts and others give money and gifts.
Families go out and have a stroll in a park, spending the rest of the day just enjoying their time. Some go to the mall and eat in restaurants or fast food chains. Kids are allowed to play in amusement centers.
And that's how we celebrate our Christmas. ☺️❤️
What to do, what to do?
**It has been over a week since my phone gave up on me. So I can't do much with my online things. Life seems so slow these past few days. I can't work on my online captcha typing regularly, like I can just have an hour or two to work, even less coz I just borrow my Mom's cellphone.**
And since I can't do online work, I divert my attention to my mini-garden. Actually, I just called it "mini" because of the little space my plants occupy in front of our house. But I think I have almost a hundred variety of plants now. Ornamental plants and cns ( cactus and succulents ) combined. And there maybe a few more additionals in the next few days.
I borrowed Mom's phone for a while so I can join the first half hour of my favorite seller turned friend, that way I can see the good stuff that she flexes first during the live, and then I exit the live after I get what I like from her cns and after that she sends me pictures of the other plants through messenger so I can choose again and have them delivered the next day.
But it's much more fun when we're on live, I get to interact with the other buyers, who are now my friends too. We joke around and tease each other, along with the seller. We always have a good time while on live, creating a good vibes with the other buyers who are watching with us.
And since we've turned to friends now, we sometimes give way to one another, like when one of us really likes a certain plant that one of us mined first, that first one usually gives the plant to the one who wishes to have it. But there is one of us always gives us a surprise by sending a set of plants along with the ones we originally purchased. That's how my cns collection blow up in numbers! Imagine purchasing 8 variety of cns.....but what you receive is a big box full of cns.....with 20 cns! The additional 12 came from our "mayora", that's how we call her since she loves to giveaway cns during the live selling. The picture below shows what she sent to me last week.
And since Chistmas is just around the corner.....me and my daughters have started putting up our Christmas decors. The Christmas tree goes first, decorated it with some silver and gold balls, poinsettias and of course, Christmas lights. The garland goes next, my daughter put it on the shelves right above our TV. Added some silver and gold balls and poinsettias too, and a dancing LED lights beneath the garland. We're not yet done with decorating because we're still waiting for another set of Christmas decors, including lights and some other stuff to place on the tree. And then maybe some DIY Christmas decors would be fun to do too. And this is how the living room looked like after setting up the tree and the garland.
So, that's it for now, I have to give the tablet back to my son. This is what he uses for his online class. The school where he goes, let the students who don't have cellphones. This is such a big help to students eventhough the load for internet connection is shouldered by the students.
Thanks again for reading my new article and I really hope I could write regularly. Keep safe everyone.
Dream Dream Dreams
*These past few days.....I always have weird dreams that I remember when I woke up, and even days after. Unlike my other dreams that I forget when I awake or a few minutes after.*
**In one of them, I am with some family members who are already in the afterlife.....my Grandmother, my Daddy and my husband. In that particular dream, my husband is in a room inside a familiar house, it looks like the one and my family moved into when we left Manila. He is asking me if I wanted to come and live with him in another house that he is currently renting. Also telling me to convince my kids to live with us too. Then my Grandmother called me and told me to eat what she has cooked for me, and I saw the table full of dishes that she used to cook for us. And then my Dad asked me to buy something, I forgot what it is, from the nearby store. When I came back, again my husband said that I should come and live with him. This time I cried, I said I can't and I don't want to be with him again ever. When I woke up, I was still crying.**
*Another dream of mine is somewhat scary. I was being chased by an evil creature. His eyes fiery red, skin glowing red as if on fire, long pointed horns black as the darkest night and he's got black aura glowing around him and he has a very deep scary voice that seems to be coming from the graves. I was running, I know I was but I seem to be not moving from where I am, as if my feet are glued to the ground. And when I finally get to move, me feet feel so heavy and when I looked down, the ground is melting making it hard for me to run fast. And then the ground turned solid again but I still can't run fast. I have to grab on to something and pull myself forward to be able to move away from the evil creature. When I looked back, he's just a few feet behind me. And just as he is about to grab a hold of me, I woke up, thank goodness for that. I was really scared at that moment, so I prayed again before going back to sleep.*
**This is one is a dream from way back 1991 as I clearly remember because this is the year when I gave birth to my eldest son. It was September 1991 when my great grandmother died because of asthma and other complications. A week after she was buried, I dreamt about her. In my dream, me and my brother decided to visit our cousins living in our grandmother's house. When we got there, there are so many people inside and outside the house as if there's a grand occassion or feast of some kind. As we entered the house.....we we're greeted by a table full of foods, but I can't recognized any of them. Suddenly, my great grandmother is already standing beside me. Holding out something she got from the table, telling me to try eating what she's giving to me. I did have a bite of that and it tastes weird, like I was chewing a carton or a paper. When I woke, I told my parents about what I had dreamt about last night. My Dad said that I should not eat anything my great grandmother hands over to me. I didn't tell them that I did eat something.**
And of course, there's also a funny dream. In my dream, I was already in bed and ready to sleep. But before I sleep I checked the tablet first if it needs to be recharged. Seeing that it's on 45%, I decided to charge it before I fall asleep. After a few minutes, I checked if the tablet is still charging. But upon checking, it has stopped charging. And I saw that the extension was unplugged. So I told my daughter to have it plugged again. My daughter stared at me as if I've gone crazy. And then she told me that it is still plugged in. And that's I realized I was in dream then woke up thinking I'm still dreaming but in reality I am already awake lol
The first two are my recurring dreams.....meaning I have repeatedly dreamed about the same scene over the past years, specially the second one. Different places but the same scenario.
Thanks again guys for reading my article....til next time. Keep safe everyone ☺️🤗
Are You Ready?
***A simple question, yet some of us finds it difficult to answer. And some of us can readily answer yes. Depending on what is in question.....ready for what?***
*Are you ready ( for school ) ?*
As a kindergarden kid.....I'm not ready. I don't want my mom to leave me inside the classroom. I ran after her whenever she leaves. And I still remember, there are days that I would just sleep in class and I only wake up when it's time for recess. And also I remember an instance that I ran out and followed my mom outside the school, I can'r recall how I got out but I did hahaha It went on like that for at least 2 weeks before I got used to the idea of going to school. And it really wasn't that bad after all, my thoughts then as a 5 year-old kindergarden kid.
*Are you ready ( for love )?*
As a teenager, I used to wonder if I'm not pretty enough to be noticed by the opposite sex. When I was in highschool, my pretty classmates always gets gifts whenever Valentine's day come. Some other boys from different sections, sometimes even from our section, have roses and chocolates with lovenotes delivered to our classroom, while I have none. I was thinking, maybe it's not yet for me, although I have secret crushes back then.
And then finally somebody noticed me. He was introduced by someone I know, he courted me for more than a month before I accepted him. We we're happy at first, he walks we home after class. We help each other with our homeworks, go out on movie dates with our friends. I thought he's the one for me.....not until I caught him unexpectedly, holding hands with another girl, inside the campus, imagine my surprise at that time. I really didn't think that he could cheat on me like that. I stopped talking to him, I wouldn't want to hear his lies. And that was my very first heartbreak.
Are you ready ( for married life ) ?
I thought I was ready, but I was wrong. Should've finished my studies first before I got myself into a marriage which turned out bad.
You see, I was only 18 when I eloped with my late husband. I don't know why I did that, maybe because I was young and naive at that time. I turned a blind eye on things or signs that warned me that I am getting myself into trouble. I should've listened to what people arround me are saying about what kind of life I'd be living if I marry him. But I didn't and got married anyway.
Yes, they were right all along. 24 years of marriage but I can count on my fingers the times I felt happy during those years. It was a marriage full of lies, on his part. He cheated on me so many times. Even got hooked on illegal drugs, there was a time I he even tried to kill me, if not for our youngest son, he would've strangled me to death. I never said anything to anyone, I don't want my family to know what I am going through.
The only thing that came out good of our narriage are my kids. They didn't take on after their father, and I thank God for that. They cheer me up when their father left us for another woman, much younger than me. They say it's ok, let him be, they won't leave me no matter what. They even said that I ought to find someone else too. That's how much my kids love me, because they are witnesses to what their father has done to me.
Are you ready ( to join our Creator )?
I find this question a bit difficult to answer. Maybe I am maybe I'm not. Ready because that is where we all are going, the afterlife. We have to be ready because we don't really know when our time will come. That's why I always pray, I pray to thank Him for a new day He has given to me....and I pray to ask for forgiveness for all the wrong that I have done.
And not ready, because my kids are still young to not have a mother by their side to guide them and to take care of them. I can't imagine not being with them, not being able to touch them, kiss them, hug them or talk with them. I always say that if I die, I'd stay here with them so I can always be with them. I would refuse going up to Heaven, I will stay here in the world of the living.
And that's it for now, my phone is going to shutdown again 😅 Got to save so I can buy a new one.
A Day Without My Cellphone
Yeeessss.....I finally have my phone working again. My gosh, I really thought I'm gonna loose my phone. It has happened before so I thought maybe this time, it would be the last.
It was early in the afternoon of Sunday that I noticed, my phone's battery charging is going backwards. From 50% it went down to 47%, I thought it's because of the charger I am using. So I borrowed my mom's. At first it was going well, it went up to 60%. But after a few minutes, when I checked on it again, it went down again to 50%.
***It went on like that until night, I fell asleep then woke up and poof.....my phone has shutdown. So I just let it charge, maybe it was drained, it won't turn on. After a few minutes, my daughter said she saw the battery display came out, which means it has finally started charging. And a few more minutes, my daughter tried turning it on, and it did but it was at only 4%. So i just let it charge and look for something else to do.***
So, without having my phone to work on. I started cleaning whatever I see that needs to be cleaned. I saw our electric fan in the living room which I last cleaned, I think two weeks ago. It barely gives out wind because of dust built up on the propeller and the protective grills. So thick that wind barely passes through them. And after I'm finished with the standfan, it's the deskfan's turn to be cleaned.
When my mom and kids saw me cleaning the 2nd electric fan, they started making fun of me. They began teasing me that maybe somebody is coming over to visit me, maybe my boyfriend is finally going to show up. My goodness, what a bunch of brats hahaha
After cleaning up the fans, I cleared the cieling from cobwebs and dust. My kids said, why did I remove the cobwebs, I should've not removed the webs because Halloween is already near. I told them to stop teasing me or I'll sew their lips shut and have their pictures taken and have them as a Halloween decor hahahahaha
I'm done inside the house and I don't want to hear more banters from my kids and mom. I went out and checked on my mini-garded. As I stepped outside our gate, my neighbor is outside to tending his mini garden too. That's all what we can have here in our place, a mini garden, we have to make do with what little space we have. It's a good thing I went out, he gave me another plant. A mother dwarf snake plant which I immediately placed in a white pot that I have. I'm going to give him an aglaonema in return when I get to separate the offsets from the mother plant, I told him to get a pot ready. We spent quite a long time outside, just having a chat and joking around, which was actually fun. Because we seldom have a time to have a talk because he goes to work and comes home late at night. I like talking to him, we both are plant lovers, he always gives me plants. Sometimes I suspect that he has a secret crush on me hahaha or maybe I only misinterpret the way he looks at me or smile at me whenever he sees me. Sometimes he'd pinch me in my arm when nobody is looking. Well anyway, maybe I'm just imagining things hahaha
Anyway, after the chit-chat.....I just did some quick sweeping the front of our house, checked on my succulents if they already need watering or if there are any mealybugs infesting them. Thank goodness there are no mealybugs except my trumpets, so I picked some oregano leaves, crushed them and mixed them with water and poured the mixture into a spraybottle. This is what I use as a pesticide and it really works.
After lunch, at around 2 pm, I told my daughters that we ought to watch the last 2 episodes of "Hometown Chachacha" a korean drama series. These were the most dramatic episodes of this series. I can't hold back my tears and keep on wiping my eyes til it hurts. My throat hurts too from stopping myself from crying. Chief Hong's secret past truly made me cry, the hurt he has been keeping to himself for 5 years. Not letting anyone know what he has been through before he went back to Gong-jin. That was really hard and so painful, hurting inside all by yourself. It's a good thing he's Ms. Dentist and the people of his town, who all love him so dearly. And he shouldn't blame his self for what had happened to his friends, it was really not his fault, no one is to blame actually.
Done watching the kdrama series, I started cooking so we can have dinner at 7 pm. By the way, while watching the kdrama we're having some chips and coke for snacks.
After having dinner, I checked on my phone again before going to sleep, and yes it's already 40%. My phone charges really slow when it shuts down. Maybe because the battery was drained. I can't afford to loose my phone, this is what I use for my online captcha encoding, what I earn from these sites is what I save for my kids' tablet, this is for their online class. And they also use this phone whenever they have a same time same day schedule of class. So no one would miss their classes.
And this morning when I woke up, it's on 100% fully charged. Thank you Lord, I can do my work again. I hope and pray that my phone would hold out much longer. I can't afford to loose my phone yet, I can't buy even a 2nd hand phone at this time.
One can do lots of things even without a cellphone, I came from an era where we can only communicate with someone from a distant place through telephone and snail mail. Spend our free time playing outside with friends, going out for a walk while feasting on street foods. Watching movies in movie houses and eating in a nearby fastfood resto afterwards. But now we can send a message in just one click, take pictures, listen to music and watch movies in our cellphones.
Well anyway.....that's how I spent my day without my cellphone. How about you guys, what are you going to do for a day without your cellphone?
Writer's note:
lead image from Unsplash
garden photo is mine 😊
Sleepless Nights
***Hi everybody! I hope all is doing good today, unlike me.***
I'm really not feeling so well. Not because I am sick, it's because these past few days, or shall I say nights, I just have a 2 to 3 hours of sleep to none. Yes, sleep is so elusive from me this week.
No matter how I try to fall asleep, I can't. My eyes and body are tired and sleepy but my mind is wide awake. I tossed and turned in my bed, our bed that is, because I'm sharing bed with one of my daughters. And she's already complaining about my tossing and turning thing.
A friend once said to me that maybe I have an insomnia. Defined by Merriam-Webster as a **prolonged and usually abnormal inability to get enough sleep especially due to trouble falling asleep or staying asleep.**
Well, upon reading that definition of insomnia, I came into the conclusion that I do have insomnia. But I think I should consider having a visit to a doctor before I diagnose myself as an insomniac.
**Based on what I've read, there are 2 types of insomnia, acute and chronic. It is said to be acute or short term insomnia wherein it could last for days or weeks as a result of stress or trauma. While the chronic or long term insomnia which could last for a month or even more than a month, which may be associated with a person's medical conditions and/or medications.**
I fall in the first type, the acute or short term type. Because my sleeping condition returns to normal after 2 to 3 days. But still, it saps out energy from my body which is what I badly needed to get through the day and function normally. Not like this, I mean feeling so sleepy all day long, less appetite which I truly hate when delicious food is in front of me but I can't eat properly. I can't focus on my captcha encoding, I always make an error so I have to stop working before my account gets banned because of making so much mistakes in typing. And I don't feel like doing anything but just to sit and stare outside, wishing I fall asleep right then and there.
I looked up on the internet on what to do to prevent insomnia from taking over my nights. I have read that I need to avoid taking naps, limit my intake of caffeine, which really made me sad because I'm a coffee lover. Avoid eating or drinking too much before bed is also advised. I think I can do that. A warm bath, reading or listening to relaxing music could help too. I would try all of these to fight off insomnia and I hope that I would win the battle hahaha
***And of course, as they always say at the end of an ad for a medicine, if symptoms persist, consult a doctor.***
That's all for today guys, wish I could sleep well tonight. Thanks for having the time to read this one. Keep safe everyone.
Finding Love on the Internet
The rain is pouring, the wind is blowing and my thoughts wandering. I'm just sitting here staring outside at the rain, thinking of someone. Wondering what he is doing right now, is he also thinking about me or not. Yes, he is my special someone. We have been a couple for 1 year and 7 months already.....how time goes by so fast. It seems like we've just only met yesterday.
We met in a social media group for single moms and dads. I only joined the group because a friend invited me there so I can meet new people and have fun to relieve me from the stress, she's an admin there and she introduced me to her friends there. So they said to me, ***start posting anything, a quote or a meme or my photo, to let people I'm there and that I exist hahaha***.
And that's what i did, I posted some qoutes or memes that I think worthwhile to share. Some are funny qoutes and some are romantic qoutes. And yes, I did meet new people, fresh faces, interacting with them on the comments section. Some of them even became my friends up until now.
That's how my routine in the group, I post they react and comment. Until one day, there is this guy who is always giving heart reacts to my posts. I only noticed him when he finally commented a sticker, the one that is showing a sad boy. This aroused my curiousty because my post is not at all something to be sad about. So I replied, ***why are you sad?*** To which he replied....***because I still haven't seen you.***
I was surprised by what he said and I asked him why do you want to see me? He just said never mind, just let it slip. So that's what I did, but he didn't stop reacting and leaving comments on my posts. He'd sometimes say hi to me or leave a sticker comments. Until one day he said that I'm a snob which is very not true. I asked him why he said that, and he told me that he has sent me a private messenge on my messenger. So I quickly opened my messenger and yes, he has a message request hahaha
When I opened his message, this is what I saw. He's asking how old am I. So I told him my age and he said his age too. And found out that I am 12 years ahead of him. He said it doesn't matter because he believes that age is just a number. From then on we became chatmates, then he started calling me on messenger. Talking until midnight or until I fall asleep. Never a day or night will pass by that I won't receive a call from him. And in those times that we talk, I know that he's been holding back from saying something to me, unti one day while we're having our usual chat.
He finally let it out hahaha I didn't believe at first thinking he was just joking around. But as days pass by, he finally convinced me that he's serious about what he said. It doesn't matter if we have a 12 year gap between us. And I decided to give it a try, because I have fallen inlove with him too. After 2 weeks of being officially in a relationship, we agreed to go out on a date, our very first date and first time to see each other in person. But sadly, it the planned date didn't go through. Spoiled by the lockdown because of covid19. So we have no choice but to postpone the date until everything is alright.
Now that we're on a more linient situation where we can go out again but we still haven't seen each other in person. Always something comes up whenever we set up our date. I told maybe it's not yet the right time for us to be together. We'll just have to wait for the right time. We have come so far, going through some ups and downs, having fights like other couples do. But our fights don't last long, we both can't stay angry to each other for a long period of time. He always assure me and makes me feel secure about his love for me. And I really hope that soon, we'll meet and spend sometime together.
What do you think guys? Does our relationship has a future? I really hope so, because I only feel this way with him.
Writer's note: photos are mine, those are our conversations 😁
Songs, Memories, Feelings and People
*It's funny how some of us, if not all, can relate to a particular song. Sometimes just hearing the opening notes of the song brings back flashes of memories from way way back.*
Sometimes when I hear a familiar music being played on the radio, it brings back some memories. Some are happy moments.....some are sad moments and some are kilig moments hahaha
I was born in the 70's so I grew up with the music of the 80's. It was the era of new wave and beautiful and meaningful lovesongs. With Madonna and Cyndi Lauper dominating the airwaves. The Cure, Tears for Fears, Spandau Ballet and Duran Duran were the famous boybands at that time.
Hearing and playing their songs takes me back to my highschool days, days where we always have parties during the weekends held at the school.
The song Somebody by Depeche Mode was played in a dance party held in our school for Valentine's day. I remember being asked for a dance by my crush, I was so happy and nervous at that moment, I can't think of anything to say and I can't look at him straight into his eyes though I know he was staring at me. He was from another section but same year as mine. When the music stopped all I remember was that he said thanks and I said you're welcome. I thought that that was the end, but nooooo.....the following school day, I was surprised to see him at the school gates as if waiting for someone. I thought he was waiting for his friend but as I got near him, he broke into a dazzling smile so I smiled back nervously thinking was it really me to whom he smiled at.
And yes, it was me hahaha so that was the start of our short-lived lovestory. Because after two weeks of being a couple, I caught him with another girl. So from then, I just focused on ny studies thinking I could meet someone better than him.
The song "You are the Reason" by Calum Scott is one memorable song. Sent to me through messenger by my current love ❤️ He said that I'me the reason why he is happy and contented now ( and I wonder how long he would stay this way hahaha ). I was surprised when I opened his message and saw the mv that he sent, I really didn't expect that he would do that. That was a first time in our 1 year and 7 months of being bf/gf. And now, he always send me music videos when he misses me or when he just suddenly thought about me when he hears a song the sends me a video of that song.
And in return, I sent to him this song by Christina Perri. I secretly laughed when he said what he felt while watching the video. He said that he didn't know that he will feel that way, his heart beating fast and he feels like crying at the same time. I couldn't believe it either but I know he's telling the truth. He said if he could only make a marriage proposal right then and there, he would. But we both know that it's not yet the right time, so we'll just both enjoy and cherish the moments of us being in love.
Now this song always brings tears to my eyes. It always reminds me of my Dad. As the song says....I'd play a song that would never end to dance with my father again. I didn't even had the chance to speak with him before he left us. He was already gone when I reached home. He was lying lifeless on the bed, looking so peaceful, and I know he felt no pain when he had his last breath. All I could do at that moment was to cry and give him my last hug and kiss and whispered to his ear how much I love him, and said my last goodbye.
And of course.....since we are now in the Ber months, meaning Christmas is just around the corner. Just hearing this song from Jose Mari Chan lets us feel the special feeling during this season. It makes us want to unbox all our Christmas decors and put up our Christmas trees. And set up the Crhristmas lights outside our houses and inside too, giving our home a festive mood. It also reminds us to think of something special to give to our love ones, no matter how much it costs, because always remember, it's the thought that counts.
These are my thoughts for today. How about you fellas, what songs brings back memories to you?
Writer's note: all photos are mine and edited using picsart.....lyrics I copied from google ( of course wherelse 😁 )
I hope you enjoyed reading. Til my next article, keep safe everyone.
A Day of Boredom
*Have you experienced a time when you can't get yourself do something worthwhile? Like you don't know what to do or where to* *go. A feeling of listlessness.*
Today, i swear is the most boring day of my life. Not that my life is always on jolly side, it's always been on the boring side, but today is the worst.
My day started just the way it always do. I get up my bed ( which I share with my daughter ), change my clothes, go out and buy something for breakfast and lunch too so I won't have to go out again later in the afternoon.
Walking on my way to the market.....which is several blocks away from our house, I passed by the same houses, plants, dogs, cats and people. Nothing new to see, all the same, I passed by the church and said a little prayer of thanks and continued walking again. Greeting people I know as I pass by them, glancing at the meat, fish and vegetables while thinking of what to buy for our lunch. I stopped at the meat shop, bought a kilo of chicken. Then I bought some barbeque marinade mix, calamansi and charcoal. I'm gonna grill the chicken later on. For breakfast, I bought some hot pandesal and eggs.
When I got home I cooked the eggs, scrambled and sunny side up. After we had our breakfast it's time to clean the house. My daughters took charge of doing the insides of the house while I do the outside. I swept the dried leaves and other rubbishes on the street out front. Then I watered my plants in my mini-garden. Checked them if some insects are doing damage to my helpless babies. After that I'm back again inside to do the dishes. And then that's it.....time to take a rest for a little bit while.
That's when boredom hits me. I don't know what to do next, not that I don't have anything more to do. There are lot's of things to do around here. But my mind and my body won't cooperate.....won't budge a bit eventhough I know I have something to do.
I don't know.....but I really don't feel like doing anything. It feels like, my energy was all used up,drained. Another factor is the heat. Like it's draining the energy out from my body and my brain too, I think. I really can't get my body to move to do something,and when I do.....I cannot finish what I started doing.
At one time, I got my agalaonema plant to separate the babies coming out from the mother plant. But I just stared at it for a long time and ended up putting it back to its place, as I am saying to myself in my mind that I'll do that tomorrow (hopefully )
Then I opened my account on my online captcha typing work, started working on my captchas but after a few minutes I stopped. Suddenly I lost my interest in what I'm doing so I just stopped coz I'm making mistakes in typing and those mistakes can result on my account being banned from the site and that's what I don't want to happen.
Not wanting to do anything more, I headed for my bed, lied down hoping that I could fall asleep. But failed.....too hot to go to sleep. I felt very uncomfortable while lying, don't know how or where to position my body. I keep on tossing and turning, so irritating. The tv is on but I have no interest with what they are watching.
I went out, stared at my mini-garden, pluck dried leaves here and there. Then I went inside again, played with our dogs for awhile. Made myself some coffee, ate what's left from our breakfast. Checked what's new in my fb and noise.cash. Checked my balances in my gcash, coins.ph and coinbase. Checked my messenger. Still, nothing interests me.
And now.....finally, it's night time once again. It's raining, so the it's much cooler now. Time to sleep, feeling very tired even if I have not done anything. I am hoping and praying that tomorrow will be different than today.
That's all for now everyone. Have a goodnight. Keep safe.
Journey to the World of Cryptocurrency
It's a hot sunnyn afternoon again. After raining so hard for about 15 to 20 minutes, I guess....the rain suddenly stopped and the sun showered us with her heat rays once again. The weather nowadays has become so unstable, shining so bright then raining so hard in a matter of seconds of minutes.....can't help myself to compare it to crypto values hahaha at first you feel so happy coz the value of your crypto is so high then the next minute or next day you'll feel pain ( yes, pain coz it hurts to see your crypto price so low LOL )
*Crypto what???*
I didn't know anything about cryptocurrencies before. Didn't even know they exist hahaha Since I was not allowed by my late husband to go out and get myself a job.....I started searching for ways to earn some money online.
Tried signing up in some sites that they say I could earn some cash. I tried answering surveys that pays you after you have completed a series of questions. But haven't got paid in any of these. Then I saw someone posted a ptc earning site, so I signed up hoping to get something there, but failed.
And then I found 2captcha.....this is where I really earned some cash. I created a coins.ph account to receive my withdrawals. That's where I saw BTC or bitcoin. Out of curiousity, I researched what BTC is, and according to Google bitcoin is the world’s first cryptocurrency, a decentralized cryptocurrency originally described in a 2008 whitepaper by a person, or group of people, using the alias Satoshi.
And I found some sites that let's you earn btc by watching ads or just by claiming satoshis within a time frame, and withdraw the claimed satoshis directly to your btc wallet address. But after some time these sites has stopped giving out payouts. So I have to search where to earn more btc, I saw in a fb group post about a game where you can earn and withdraw btc thru coinbase. And again I started earning btc again, I saved up a good amount with these sites and games.
Then there came etherium, xrp and bch. I found games too from which I could also earn these other cryptos. Some are still paying while others are gone.
*From BTC to BCH*
After a few months of loving btc, I was introduced to bch or bitcoin cash, it was very much easier to earn than btc and has a much much lower transaction fee than any other crypto. So this made me focus on bch earning sites now.
When I withdraw my Kolotibablo earnings, I always select bch as my mop ( mode of payment ), first to my cryptoswapp account then I transfer it to my coins.ph bch wallet.
And for my 2captcha withdrawal, it is directly sent to my coins.ph bch wallet address also. Half I convert to peso and the other half stays in my bch wallet. When the value goes up, and I see that the trend will go for a dip, I convert it to peso. And then I wait for the value to go at its lowest then I'll buy some bch again.
Even in telegram, I found a bot that you'll just have to view an ad, join chatrooms or message bots to earn bch. And it really pays, I made several withdrawals from there and it still a very legit bot.
BCH in noise.cash and read.cash
I discovered noise.cash when someone posted something about earning bch multiple times a day. She said that all you have to do is post and comment and you'll earn some bch. So I decided to give it a try, thinking maybe this time, this noise.cash is not like the first app I have tried that they say will let you earn just by posting, reacting to a post blah blah blah but at the end, it's so damn hard to earn points and eventually reach the required minimum amount to payout.
So I signed up in noise.cash.....started posting some content that I thought might interest the other members. And interacted in the comments section. And viola....I started receiving bch in my account. I also joined some giveaway games to add more bch to my wallet. Thinking of something worthwhile to post in noise.cash became a habit. Taking pictures of my breakfast, lunch or snacks, my plants or what I watch and posting them with a sensible caption.....or sometimes just sharing my thoughts or feelings.
There came a time when I was not able to receive any tips or I can't give tips to other members. It lasted for almost a month, I wanted to quit noise.cash then but some said just keep on posting and interacting and soon everything will be back to normal. And it did, same day that I have decided to quit noise.cash, when I opened my notifications, it was there.....I was given a $0.01 free tip to give to others. And when I posted, I got tips again. I really was loosing hope then, I guess the timing was very accurate hahaha So until now, I'm still in noise.cash earning bch.
And then a read in noise.cash about read.cash.....somebody posted about telling people that she has already submitted her 2nd article in read.cash. Again.....out of curiousity, I asked what is read.cash all about. She said it's much like noise.cash but a bit different. Because in read.cash you have to write an article, not just a simple post. At first I was hesitant when I learned that I have to compose an article. Just like writing an essay hahaha and I'm not really good at that. I actually hate essay making when I was still a student.
But those who are already in read.cash encouraged me to start writing. They say it maybe difficult at first but you'll get the hang of it. I didn't make an action immediately, it took me at least a month or so to finally make an account here at read.cash and start constructing an article. And yes, it is somewhat difficult....sometimes I can't think of anything to write about.
And now, read.cash is now an addition where I earn bch and I hope to keep on earning while enjoying reading and learning from other articles.
So that's a bit of my experience with cryptocurrencies and I really hope that I could also learn how to trade....that is one more thing I really really wish I could do.
And that's all for now guys.....I think I'll go and have a bath first because it's kinda hot and i feel that my skin is now sticky hahaha Thanks for taking your time to read through my article today. Keep safe everyone.....stay at home, don't go out unless necessary and always wear your facemask.
*all photos are mine 😊😊😊*
Factory Resetting Failure
*My phone is so lag and apps keeps on crashing and very slow to load. So i've decided to reset or reformat it.*
I am always irritated when i'm using my phone. When I am working on my kolotibablo bot app, it always crashes. So i have to log in again and start all over again. When I open apps, it took so long for them to get me to the home page. When I play my online games, it's okay in the first few minutes. But as the game progress, it begins to lag until it comes to a point that I can't play the game properly.
And so, I went to my phone settings, looked where to reset/reformat my phone. When I found it, I clicked on factory reset. It says, it will erase everythingI have on this phone. Clicked on okay, and waited until it's done.
*And yes, everything was deleted, oh my gosh!*
I thought everything is alright, not until I can't turn on wifi because it still has to go under some verifications and setting up. I wanted to open my messenger so I can copy the wifi password and download my previous apps but I need to update messenger to its new version before I can use it. So I tried logging in to my facebook account through the browser, using free facebook. But the verification code took so long to receive in my smart number.
The only solution is to connect to a hotspot to download the messenger's update. I's a good thing my daughter has load for hotspot sharing. But the download got stuck in pending status for at least 3 minutes so I decided to turn on my phone's data connection, luckily it still has enough mb to finish updating google play services and messenger.
The funny thing is, that after all the time that I am panicking about my wifi connection, I didn't notice that my phone is already connected to the wifi ( my neighbor's wifi LOL )
*Downloading my important apps and trying to remember my passwords, username, gmail accounts and seed phrases.*
I began downloading again the important apps like my e-wallets, earning apps and games. I didn't have problems with some but I had a hardtime with my 2nd gmail account. I can't recall my password. I have tried every password I can remember that I think I used. But I really can't remember.
I know I have written my password for that gmail account somewhere. So, i started searching through my notes. I flipped through my notebooks to check if I have written my password there. And I found it on my blue notebook, together with my other accounts'password. Felt relieved because if I didn't find it, I can't open my gmail and I can't use my coins.ph for cash out transactions.
But here is where I failed, I can't find my seed phrase here in read.cash 😭 I lost my balance in my wallet. It's almost $3.00 as I can remember 😞 My wallet here is now back to zero, so sad and unfortunate for me. I should've written them down on my notebook.
Anyway, I hope I can earn that amount again. Lesson learned, write down all the important things, email addresses, phone numbers, recovery words, seed phrases and passwords, before reformating your phone.
That's all for now, I just want to share with you my experience in my phone reformating adventure LOL Thank you guys for reading. I'm gonna try and open my noise.cash next 😁
Writer's note : Photo used from Unsplash
Give me a Break
Hello everyone 😊 it's been awhile since I published my last article. With all the things I have to do around the house, I barely have the chance to sit and take a hold of my cellphone. And whenever I hold my cp, it's either just to check my messenger for updates on my youngest son's online class schedule. They still have no modules and books yet. And we're still waiting if they are going to be given free tablets because last year, they gave the grade 9 students free tablets.
And these past days, we watch the Squid Game in the afternoon before I start again with my chore here at home. A very very entertaining k series, specially when they start the games. It makes you wanna go in there and help the lead characters win. Because when the players loose the game, they are eliminated, meaning they are killed, shot by the men who wore customes like they came out from the game AMONG US hahaha we are now on the 6th episode, but we'll watch it when we are all complete here at home, so we can watch the show together, it's not fun watching when one of us is missing.
I don't even get to catch some sleep in the afternoon. Because I do some online encoding to bring in some extra money in my coins.ph. Additional budget and I want to save up some money so I can buy a new cellphone. Because my phone has a cracked lcd on the upper part and sometimes I can't use it properly coz the touch screen goes crazy, they said it's called ghost touch. I already canvassed how much it would cost to get this fixed. And my gosh, just a little bit more and I can buy a new phone with it. So i have decided to just save up and buy a new one than to get this fixed.
And because I don't get to nap in the afternoon, whenever I try to start writing an article at night, I can't, my mind and body is too tired to come up with a sensible content. I end up playing my games in Cash Alarm, gaining some points to redeem and add some cash in my Paypal account. And then I fall asleep unconsciously hahaha I'm still holding my phone when I wake up in the middle of my sleep.
And re-potting my newly acquired succulents takes up a part of my time. But it's quite alright, this is my reward for myself. This is my comfort zone, my stress reliever. I feel so happy whenever I look at them and see them growing healthy under my care. I think I have broken the curse hahaha they used to say I don't have a future with plants, I only end up killing them. But not anymore, the proofs are out there. I'm gonna show you in my next article the improvements or evolution of my mini-garden and I am really so proud of myself 😁
That's all for now guys, have to get up and continue with my chores. Time to cook some sotanghon for our lunch.
Keep safe everyone. 🤗🤗🤗
@SimplyMe
