Lets be practically real here, "what's your deepest worries about a relationship?" I guess we all have different approach to love and to be loved.. but the idealogy of what he pays for he own, something in return for your heart is the currently used method with most start ups.. so if a lady sees love as a man helping with the Bill's and a man sees love as a woman showing love as intimacy then that's the way both speak their love but there is a big clause. It doesn't last too long till you let loose and feel insecure.
If everything ends at being at the dating stage and what was originally the intention is broken the heart is as well. You gotta do what you gotta do at the right spark, you need no validation or test to know that you both need to further this thing... looking at the solidity and consistency of a relationship but it's also going to have to be both ways, neither party shouldn't buy their right to be a husband or a wife.
Dating isn't for a man to see how the lady is good in bed π or the woman to how well the man can provide anything, if that's the case it would just be a relationship with benefits and not feelings. This could also be trusted as one leading to marriage, because you already understand what you are in for so maybe I'm not fully aware of what dating means but I can put you up for a test... "how long have you been out together and how many times have you brought up the word marriage and how many times was the subject changed?" The way you all are dating and your requirements in dating have nothing to do with marriage..
At the end of the day the question needs to be asked "Can I trust this person? Is this person going to be faithful to me? Is this person going to treat me with respect? Paying Bill's and having sex is not a priority in a relationship.. these days where the lady earns even much more than a man does so if a man provides he would have to be the greatest person in the world but if it turns out to be the other way around it still doesn't matter. Marriage should be about love and not an expense paid trip to a fantasy world or dream works so should this be mixed up together.
There are some stories that will should serve as a good example to you and I, reflect on your decisions and do what's right.. but if you are more comfortable just being around him or her that's your choice to make too.. What would you rather do when the money stops coming or when the love suddenly vanishes. It's hard sometimes when we really desire for the relationship to move further than where it is now but you can't only be the determining factor...
I think I have exhausted some points, but your opinion will be much appreciated... The first to fifth dat usually have a name to it, seen a movie about that but can't remember... I hope I have solved some really rough questions.. do not make it a requirement all the time for your partners to be 100% at their game.. if she doesn't do certain things that doesn't give you the chance to see any fault in that and if he doesn't do a particular thing right that should also give the chance to pick faults..
You feel that you can tolerate a lot in dating than in marriage, you all need to get something straight and clear it's time to stop worrying about marriage or its logistics... when you have somebody you can build a bond with don't wait too long because time is running he or she could leave you any minute and what you've lost can be hard to get back...
Thanks for reading, watch out for my Halloween scare on the 29th, then answers to some questions on the 30th... love you all..
A big appreciation to my readers and to my sponsors, it means a lot to me each day you come through... bye for now.
October 2021
Last Sunday I joined a Bible study, then the Pastor asked, "Who are in a relationship here?". 4 or 5 raise their hand, including my bestfriend. Then the Pastor asked her, "Are you sure that he is the one you will marry someday? ". She answered "It depends Pas, sometimes we have these plans which is contradict to God's plans". The Pastor told them that what's the point of having a relationship when you don't have a plan to marry. Just my bestfriend felt bad, because she just point of her side; not to be judge.