Pause, Take A Rest, and Reflect
I don’t really know how to start this. But I guess being honest about what you feel will help you to figure out how to start it. What?
I am still figuring out how to effectively write my thoughts. This is what I am working out for years and until now I am still struggling. Every time someone asks what’s the problem, I can’t explain it. Maybe I am too overwhelmed by my emotions that words can’t express them.
I took some time yesterday to reflect. I noticed that I am skippings some steps just to reach my goals faster. With every skip, I constantly find myself trying to be consistent with it. As a result, I went outside of my limitations, leaving me drained and exhausted.
It's like running, as a child you will leap or hop just to outrun your playmates. Doing these consecutively will make your legs tired and sore.
I hope you get my point. That’s me, and I’ve been doing that since I was a child. I was too impatient so I always find shortcuts. When I find something hard, I will find a way to reach the reward without experiencing hardships. When I failed, I will get disappointed and will blame myself for not doing better.
But I am aware that life is not like that. Like what I have read in the book ‘The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck’ by Mark Manson, pain and challenges are part of human experiences, and it's pretty normal. I just can’t stop myself from doing those shortcut shits. I want instant gratification and validation from others. Getting something that I want and being praised is usually my main goal.
So, yesterday some of you may notice that I was inactive in both readcash and noisecash. As I mentioned earlier, I took some time to reflect. I step back and tried to figure out things. I am thankful that I was able to get back on track immediately.
In writing here, I was getting insecure. I feel that in almost two years of staying here I haven’t achieved anything significant. I am still found myself struggling, asking for validations from other people.
I am sorry to those writers if ever I told you that you’re my inspiration. To be honest, I am not quite sure if I am just envious, and I am trying to do the same and reach your level. I don’t know. Maybe I am just wrong here in this paragraph since I still don’t understand what’s forcing me to continue, is it I am just envious or I am just inspired. Reading your stories amazes me and it urges me to be a better person, to improve myself, to do better.
The only problem I see with me being envious or inspired by other people is the constant desire to find a shortcut and see some instant results in my efforts. When things didn't fall into place, I will see myself as a failure and it will take me time to be motivated again. Doing these things consistently makes me exhausted over time.
Right now, I will try again to take it slowly. And if ever found myself in trouble again, I will pause, take a rest, and reflect.
Final remarks....
I also want to use this opportunity to say thanks to all of my readers. I've been saying this a lot of times but without you, I am nothing. A writer is nothing without their readers.
Expect the continued program for the next few days. Better and well-written articles are coming up!
Road to another 1 BCH!
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Okay lang yan mare, in fact I can relate to you, I feel you mare. I always look for shortcuts and easiest way to achieve what I desired to achieve but turns out it only leads me to disappoinment . :< But it's okay, go lang nang go, that doesn't stop us from achieving our goals.