@ZehraSky 26 April 2022

Hello, I am Zehra Sky I planned to write a similar article like this on my anniversary here on read.cash. However, what would be the difference if I write it now or in the future? I see no big difference at all so I decided to just go ahead and write this article. When I was planning this article, I wanted to write a bit of an overview of my journey here. The story of where I started my self-love journey and where I am currently at is the main theme I had in mind. Right now, I guess I can still do that but I have never once imagined that I would write the things I will write here today. It started with a decision The decision to finally let go of my hesitations and fears of the things that I have little knowledge of. Had I succumbed to the fear, I would have never established a safe haven in this place. This is where I started to finally allow myself to be me, outside of the mask I have created for the world. In this site, I let myself be free. With this newfound freedom, I learned happiness. It is an egg But the happiness I found is an egg that is so easy to break and impossible to repair. I found myself constantly anxious about my hold. I wanted to be at peace but I always had to worry if my happiness will last or if the shell will be broken any minute now. Inevitably, it did When the inevitable finally happened, I was not surprised. Maybe the ones who have been with me since the start of my journey will be able to remember the rollercoaster of my articles. Maybe they would remember a time where I was active until one day, I mostly disappeared. I will pop in once in a while to interact then be gone again. I feel like the clouds Ever changing, never staying in one place. I guess those are good words to describe me. It definitely catches the way my mind would flip as if a switch was suddenly turned off and on. The skies are sometimes clear for some time. The sun shines so bright and the birds sing with delight. In my mind, everything would be so amazing. The trees I have always watched will look so new to me. The path I have taken million of times before would feel so unfamiliar. The world would sing to me, and in response I would live without a bit of worry. All caution thrown into the wind, just happily living my life. The sunshine burns But the sun leaves burns on the skin if left unprotected. The sun end up hurting innocent bystanders. And the sun burns itself just to keep itself warm and to keep its shine. Just as my mind would chase the soark of motivation I have without stopping to see if I could hurt someone. Most times, I end up hurting myself from my actions. When the sun hides or sleeps The clouds loom over everything. It hides the light and things are cast in shadows. The clouds move slowly as if dragged down by their own weight. The sky looks so dark that it was as if no light can penetrate it. I would feel to drained to even move. My body just can not seem to grasp the need to do the necessity to keep my body alive. Too much yet too empty. I am too out of it to even see the people who care for me. Closing word This is a bit more abstract than my other articles but I kinda love it. Well, I might change my mind tomorrow but in my sleepy mind, this work looks great. This is just a shallow dive of what goes on in my head. There are more words in the currents of my mind but I am leaening how to pick out things carefully instead of focusing on everything at once. I am Zehra Sky, and I would not know who I would be without my words. **Thank you for reading this article!** If you want to read some more articles of mine, I have monthly summaries here: **March 2022 Articles Summary** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/march-2022-articles-summary-f8534b65 **February 2022 Article Summary** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/february-2022-article-summary-1ac4a2d8 **January 2022 Articles Summary** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/january-2022-articles-summary-158cfc1f **December 2021 Articles Summary** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/december-2021-articles-summary-900cb111 ****November 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/november-2021-articles-summary-2c68b6ca **October 2021 Articles Summary** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/october-2021-articles-summary-1293a999 ****September 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/september-2021-articles-summary-7febda16 ****August 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/august-2021-articles-summary-cb068f97 ****July 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/july-2021-articles-summary-fc106569 ****June 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/june-2021-articles-summary-baeb334f ****May 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/may-2021-articles-summary-5ba6d0c7