@ZehraSky
A true friend Friendship is definitely a powerful bond to have. Many seek this amazing companionship even to the point of changing themselves just to fit in. This is especially true for young adults where friendship circles are made based on your hierarchy in the social ladder at your respective schools. Or well, that is how the social circles formed at our school. Anyway, sometimes friendships made in highschool are for a lifetime. These friends will be with you through multiple ups and downs. Most times though, friendships in highschool fades away as everyone starts taking different courses on college. Additionally, friendships formed at an age where peer pressure is prominent are most of the times shallow in nature. The circles are for your go-to persons to have fun or to go on a new experience with. Rarely do friendships with deeper connections exist in high school. Today, I want to share about how I learned to recognize a true friend from someone who is just a friend in name only. Since graduating from high school, I drifted away from my circle of friends. These were the people who trusted me eith their deepest secret yet could not be bothered to reach out after they found new people to talk to. These were the people that I thought who will be my solid support system. Anyway, enough about my by-gone friendships. Let me share what qualities I look for to see if someone is a true friend or not. **They respect me** This one is easy enough. I usually notice of someone respects me by the passing comments they say when they think I cannot hear them. I define respect as an act of acknowledging my worth and what I could contribute. **They know when to listen** For me, a true friend is someone who knows when to stop trying to fix things and just listen. Sometimes, pronlems require no solution. I might just need someone to lend me an ear. **They share their vulnerabilities** This is something that I look for a true friend as I do not want surface-level friendships only. A true friend, for me, is someone who I can trust and someone who trusts me as well. This means sharing some vulnerable parts of one's self. **They are dependable** A true friend is not a leech who just takes and takes. A true friend is someone who will be there for me when I need help just as I would be there for them when they need help. I imagine that someone who shared their vulnerabilities with me will be willing to ask for help should they need instead of breaking down by themselves. This is actually on of the reason why I ended up stopping my communication with most of friends in high school. Back then, I was their secret keeper. Every little thing that bothered them was shared with me and I helped them as best as I can even when I am struggling too. But when I was the one who asked for help, they turned away and pretended they did not know I was struggling. **They genuinely celebrate my success** This last one is a recent addition to my list. It is so easy to share pleasant congratulatory messages without meaning a word of it. Just recently, I learned to notice which of my friend will only celebrate my achievement if it is *below* theirs. Some friends will only be happy for you as long as you are not *ahead* of them. It is actually a disturbing experience to finally realize that it is happening though. Especially for people who I have loved and respected for a huge part of my life. Imagine realizing that someone can not be bothered to acknowledge what I achieved. Someone who I have cheered on time and time again but can not celebrate my success with me as they are not better than me this time. Closing words This tiny bit of reflection really put things into perspective about how maybe I need more friends haha. So if you need more friends, message me on Telegram (1/2 joking). Although it has been a long time since I talked with new people so my social skills are rusty. https://t.me/zehrasky What do guys look for a true friend? **Thank you for reading this article!** If you want to read some more articles of mine, I have monthly summaries here: **December 2021 Articles Summary** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/december-2021-articles-summary-900cb111 ****November 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/november-2021-articles-summary-2c68b6ca ****September 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/september-2021-articles-summary-7febda16 ****August 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/august-2021-articles-summary-cb068f97 ****July 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/july-2021-articles-summary-fc106569 ****June 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/june-2021-articles-summary-baeb334f ****May 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/may-2021-articles-summary-5ba6d0c7 To show my appreciation for the support that I have been receiving, please accept a small gift I prepared for the first reader. https://branch.wallet.bitcoin.com/PSQx6gyAMmb
10 comments
Well I am the first reader but I dont have bitcoin wallet app.At last I installed and create an account then I recieved the gift. I would be lucky to make a friendship with you.
I love friends who celebrate your success and I can genuinely determined who's who are truly happy for my success and those who are pretending.
A true friend is a gem. It reflects our care and love. They are necessary.
Nowdays finding a true friend is like finding a rare gem. I do not have a long list but I want those kind of person as my friend who will always remain loyal with me, who will respect me, who will love me with their whole heart, these are enough for me.
Those are certainly great traits to have as a friend. I agree that trust (willing to share their vulnerabilities) is one of the most important things to consider when deciding whether someone is close enough as a friend or not. Good one, Zehra!
You hit the point with the qualities you mentioned. People call each other friends, but lack certain attributes that qualifies as friendship
One of the things I realized in life is that it doesn't matter to have a small circle of friends. The smaller you have, the truest they can be. Some friends are only there when you are in the best times but nowhere to be found in your worst times. Those who stayed both in good and bad are the genuine ones. They are the ones who deserve to be kept. I have 5 of them. I met them at college and I feel lucky to have them in my life.
Sometimes I wish the people around me I call friends could have all of this but I know a true friend should and that’s works the other way around too… do we know what the true meaning of the word means, it’s so unbearable when I see friendships end we must choose wisely and I agree with that
Agreed when they are happy on your success and they offer celebration with their own. That's the lifetime friends I adore. I also that kind of friend, I am happy for everything they had, no jealousy or anything because time will come, next is our time hehe
*These were the people who trusted me eith their deepest secret yet could not be bothered to reach out after they found new people to talk to.* That's ouch. I do not know what to say but with my circle of friends both high school and college, yes we do have shared some secrets but we don't always have to be constantly in communication. We all would reach out to each other if when we needed each other's company or we needed some advice. We respect it if they would have new set of friends to talk with because we know that in our hearts, we still are friends even if we don't see or talk to each other especially now that we are experiencing a pandemic crisis. If not for this pandemic, I a mpretty sure that we would still be having our monthly gatherings and it would be the time that all of ua would catch up in everyone's lives.