Issues with me.

First of, thanks to all my amiable sponsors, subscribers, my wonderful commentators, readers, tippers and mostly to those who asked after me. Thanks for your lovely show of concern.

I've kinda been absent for over two days now; basically because of weekend stress due to my hectic part-time classes.

After the hours of lecture on Saturday, my brain was too stressed to read with understanding; the articles of my lovely writers, so without understanding what I've read, there's surely no way I'd be able to drop not just a comment, but a reasonable one, talk more of creating my own article. I'm actually a little bit happy that ASUP have decided to put all full-time and part-time students on strike for two weeks. (Partially happy though). Not so happy about that...

Sighs...

Special appreciation to these two lovely writers on read: @VinceCharlie and @FashTioluwa .

Today's blog.

I'm one who is highly anti-social, so completely different from my brother; who is actually free, finds it easy to mingle with people and also the boss when it comes to retaining friendship.

Making friends...

I find it so difficult when it comes to making friends or retaining such friendship. And worst of; I find it strange when a person speaks to me for the first time, talk more; laughs and is just extremely jovial to me at first.

There are these ladies in my church, we are all in the same group, one Is named: "Oyindamola" while the other is named "Boluwatife." The very first day I set my eyes on them, I had imagined and so dreamt of becoming friends with them, I actually fell so in love with their dressing and their charisma.

But...

I can't, like I just can't walk up to them and strike a long-term conversation. Something happened yesterday and it was quite shocking.

During rehearsals, Oyindamola was sharing a particular testimony and Bolu; who sat beside me, laughed and whispered something into my ears, I literally didn't hear her, I only responded with a slight chuckle.

Then this question popped into my mind.

Really?... Did she just talk to me? Oh my goodness!! Is this a sign?.

I honestly wasn't expecting any conversation from either of them and that might be because I might prolly have an issue with lack of self-confidence.

Sighs...

I'm this kind of person that hardly relates with people, and gets so shocked when people, especially pretty ones; come, talking to me.

I stayed in my previous area of residence for 18years, when I was 13years, we had a new neighbor, a family that consisted of their parents and four children, of which, two were girls.

I admired these girls and imagined being friends with them someday, but till my family and i relocated, the only words I ever uttered to these girls were: "goodmorning, goodafternoon, goodevening and goodnight."

I always see myself as one kind of not too good looking lady who can't strike a friendly and long-term conversation with others, and when those "others" come; sticking around, I'll be like... 'Awww, is this really happening?.'

This next one is a question though and also something about me.

• Does this happen to everyone?

In most cases, when we meet a person for the very first time, (s)he tends to act all calm and normal, but after you've finally gotten to know this person so well, you'll surprised at their real interactive nature. (Not something bad, in most cases but something way different from the first day you both met).

I'm this kind of person that behaves normally at first.

For a guy, you might actually think am tripping for you, with the way I'll just be laughing and talking like someone that is picking her words.

For some other guys, I'll be too respectful, literally adding "Sir" to everything I type or say.

And for the ladies, I'll be so humble and calm, slowly observing and looking for ways I can showoff my true nature.

But, when I get really close to you, sighs... you'd be so surprised.

And finally...

• Who else does this?

When you go to an event, and you don't know anyone there, your friends are not really available, it's just you for yourself.

The food is served, it's not takeaway, it's eat and drop the plate.

How do you eat?

One thing about me is that I find it so difficult to eat in public with the exception of having my friends around. If I'm the only one at that event, I usually eat meals in a way that people who sits close to me, assumes I'm forming.

I joined a Redeem Church last year, as stated earlier, I find it hard to make friends, most times, if you don't walk up to me, I might not walk up to you, even if I'm dying to be your friend.

Back to the gist...

I was in this church, just attending services, helping them keep their seats warm and going back home.

One day...

They announced that there would be a youth seminar after service, and oh! I love attending seminars. I stayed behind, after service and assisted them in arranging the tables.

They arranged the tables and chairs exactly the way it is in the picture above, after about an hour later, people started trooping in. We sat on the chairs and the seminar began.

Now...

...since the tables and chairs were arranged in a dining room kind of setting, of course, that means there would be lots of goodies to eat. The ushers started placing groundnuts and sweets on each tables. The problem here was that, they didn't place it like: "one per person," but they just poured lots of sweets into a plate, lots of groundnuts into another plate and they placed both plates on each table.

It was: "eat as you like, just pick sweets or groundnuts and throw it into your mouth."

I was so famished that day, the people sitting beside me, were just picking sweets from the plate and licking, packing groundnuts and munching and I was there practicing how I'll stretch my hand to pick atleast; one sweet.

My dear readers, I couldn't... I just sat there, so hungry, I had to go purchase a sausage roll to eat. People from different tables, came to join us on ours, cause they saw that our sweets were still very much plenty. So they actually came to help us lick the sweets, since we've proven to be so slow at finishing them.

One guy who came to join us collected my number afterwards and guess what he told me?.

He said and I quote: You couldn't lick those sweets, you were forming because of me right?

In my mind, I was like: Guy!!! Really, it takes grace for me to fall for a guy to the extent of forming for him.

But then, I couldn't blame him, it actually seemed like I was forming. It was then I started wishing...

Me: aaah, if I knew just one person in that place ehn, or if I had a friend there, oh gosh!! The way I would have packed sweets and groundnuts ehn, you people would be wondering how many stomachs I actually have.

Thing here is that:

Is this normal? Do I have any reader here, who finds it difficult to eat in public when you don't know anybody there?

Or do I just have to work on myself?

New sponsor: I should have done this quite earlier, especially since I got this notification, three days ago. Thanks alot @NiceAYO for counting me worthy enough to be sponsored, I love and won't take this kindness of yours for granted.

Till we meet again in my next article and in yours.

Thanks for reading.