Farting in presence of your spouse.
Fart, according to Wikipedia is also referred to as flatulence and it's the intestinal wind that's passed from the anus.
Just today, I reminisced on a conversation I had with a person I take as a sister. The conversation left me in a state of wonder. I kept wondering if I should just try to adapt and start learning, honestly speaking; I don't just know why I'm so different.
It's not like I'm trying to form, or I'm probably just acting like a fine girl, but the truth is that: It irritates me whenever I hear a person talking so freely about farting or pooing, everyone poops, it's natural. But the truth is that, I just hate talking about it.
I could recall an experience I had in school, that day I badly wanted to poop, like..., I really wanted to, the school toilets aren't that good so I opted for a toilet within the boundaries of the school but not owned by the school.
To use this toilet, you have to pay for it.
To wee: 50naira.
To poop: 100naira.
When I got there, I met a queue of people, some wanted to do the same as I, while the others just wanted to relieve their bladders. The owner started questioning; asking each of us what we actually wanted to do. You should have seen me that day, the way I said the "I want to poo" I tried pronouncing it in a coded way but the owner of the place spoke pidgin and people heard: "oh you wan sheet?"
Arrgg, must you be this difficult? I rhetorically asked myself. Truth is I was quite embarrassed and when I finally went in, I was so scared and hoping it doesn't smell the way it usually smell.
The conversation I had.
In her words, she said: she wonders how people who can't fart in presence of their spouses cope, she recalled to me; something she read on one of her social media accounts. A question was asked; a question about farting in presence of your spouse, in one of the reader's comment. The woman had said; "she can't fart in her husband's presence, that if she feels the urge to fart, she'll go to the toilet to fart and if her husband feels the urge, he also does the same."
In my sister's words: How boring?!.
When she told me that, I just affirmed with a slight chuckle. I didn't know what to say, but the truth is, I actually picture having such kind of play with my spouse, you know, being so close to him to the extent of farting in his presence and laughing at eachother's fart.
But can I really do it?
I had to do some research today about this topic.
According to science, when you fart in presence of your wife/husband.
The couples might be happier and healthier.
Farting might seem uncouth and gross, infact it's a kind of rude or crude behavior. But I read that couples shouldn't shy away from; or feel ashamed of passing gas in presence of each other.
Also, today I learnt that; holding in farts can cause bad breath. Trapped intestinal gas can be reabsorbed into the bloodstream only to reemerge as bad breath.
Farts is a means of telling your spouse that you're healthy.
Farting is actually good for you, it may not be part of good manners but it's a symptom of healthy diet. If one doesn't fart and doesn't also hold it in (doesn't fart at all) it just shows they aren't eating healthy and they are just eating refined sugars.
Farts are funny: yeah, truly it is, as for me, we have various kinds of farts. The silent one, the loud one..., People do say the silent one has the worse kind of smell, but the loud ones rarely smells. Imagine you, giving your spouse different odour from your farts, with both of you laughing over it. (Isn't that funny?).
Farts is a way of telling your spouse "I love you."
Farting has different causes; which most of you all know, the intake of too much eggs, beans and so much more, but that's not my reason for this topic.
Is it okay to be disgusted when you hear someone talking so freely about passing gas, pooing and the likes?.
You know, sometimes I imagine being able to fart in presence of my spouse, and then the big question comes up: How Can I be that free with him?
I can't even fart in presence of any of my brothers, neither can they fart in my presence. Let me share a funny experience with y'all.
I was alone in the room one day, I had the urge to pass gas, since no one was within sight, I quickly allowed nature take its course. After awhile, I heard my brother's footstep, I was so scared (not like he would beat me, but I was just scared) the smell hadn't cleared off yet. I had to stop him, so to do that; I immediately stepped out to meet him and started asking him irrelevant questions, he had to stand back to reply me. After sometime when there was no question left to ask, he entered the room with me following behind while sniffing to see If the odour had cleared off. Oh! Yes it had!
I was satisfied!.
The only person I feel so confident; farting in her presence is my mum.
I could recall a period of time, when I went to stay for a week in my employer's house, based on some reasons I'd rather not discuss. But I went. Oh! That period was far from being funny.
I badly wanted to poo, but I didn't know how to go ahead with it. The stench that comes from my poo is not in this world. So I was scared of doing it and scared of them, perceiving it.
Guys... I kept it in, till I left their place a week later. Oh!, How relieved I was to finally be in the comfort of my own WC.
With the way I am, I wonder if I'll be so free with my spouse.
I would love to know your take on this.
Do you feel it's normal to fart in presence of your spouse?
And for those who just might not like it, do you feel they should try and change or do you perhaps feel it's okay for them to remain that way?
Kindly air your views on this; readers. I'm anticipating your wonderful answers.
This would be all for today, till we meet again in my next article and in yours.
Thanks for reading.
As i was reading this, I started laughing. The "oh you wan sheet?" said my the Man really made me laughed. 😂 You're funny. Silent Fart smells a lot, i could remember while we were traveling sometimes back, we were all in a bus, and an unknown person among us released a silent Fart, omo, come and bad smell, smelling like a decayed rat. The driver had to stop, we all came down so that the fart can go.
I can fart at my spouse's presence if the fart comes suddenly and there's no other way i could excuse myself.