Listen, just listen... It isn't that difficult, is it?
I was scrolling through YouTube shorts when I came across a video explaining how a young dude from South Korea got rich doing literally.... nothing. Despite this he was still very sort after. His services ? Nothing really difficult, he just walks people who need around, like those kind of people who would need just a walk with someone else down the road or down the lake or something like that. You can also go moon gazing with him and stuff but he doesn't really say a word. People who are going through difficult times could hire him to just listen to their rants without him having to say anything, if at all he has to say something, then it's Yes, No and Okay... nothing more..and guess what? This people end up feeling much better.
I realized something from the video, everyone wants to be the hero that gets someone out of a difficult situation but very little people actually take their time to listen. The moment you open up to someone they go into rescue mode and start telling you what you should and what you should not do. They start dishing out life advices you never asked for and probably will neve need, at least at that moment. This is one of the reasons why people going through depression prefer not seek help because people end up rationalizing their struggles and then open up their traps to spew stupid advice no one asked them for or even worse, proceed to sound judgemental because they don't have the complete picture of what's going on with that person, you hear them talk about how that person needs to "get closer to God" or how what they are facing is "happening to everyone else" and crap like that. If only some of us understand, people with these sort of difficulties always know what to do and you don't have to tell them anything, they aren't stupid. What they haven't mustered yet is courage and unconditional support. You know what they say about support right? It's about being there for someone. Sometimes being there for them should be taken literally, just be there. You don't have to say or do anything just listen to them and you might have no idea how much you have helped by just listening. Only talk when there's a serious and necessary need to do so.
Why do you think people keep books or little diaries inside their drawer in which they could write anything? You think if books shoot of their mouths whenever they're written on anyone would bother keeping them again? Although the book has no ability of listening, it gives a feeling of venting because you've just transferred everything going on inside your head to the book, now imagine how better it would feel if that it is a person listening without speaking while making the talker aware that you're really listening and only talking when there's a need to. No unsolicited advice, no preaching, no judgment, no going on hero mode. If every single person on earth is like this, don't you think we'd be a lot less shitty? Knowing that, as someone going through hard times, you have people whom you could just open up to without having to regret it, wouldn't that be amazing?
The good news is that listening is an art and can be honed. For me, listening skills is as important if not more important than speaking skills. Being able to make people feel at ease without talking can be learned, and you should learn it. You could literally save a life.
Sometimes all we need is someone to listen...
Thank you for reading.
Surprise! Your background now determines your future.
With the way things are going around the world and especially my country, it seems there's very little hope for those who come from a non-privileged background when it comes to obtaining governmental posts and other political appointments. Nepotism and favoritism is running rampant. People only care about their kind and view the poor as either incapable or a threat to them.
When you go to look for a job, the first thing they ask you is not "what are your qualifications" but "who sent you?". In many cases you have to know someone to get a job. If you insist that you know no one but have the required qualifications, they go through them as if they are interested but give you some other reason which is completely trivial or unreasonable as to why you can't be accepted. This has made the systems or various institutions fall below par since all those who hold the important leadership positions or otherwise got there nit by qualifications but by "knowing someone". This is why the system is deteriorating at an alarming rate. Most of the people who are put in this position know little or nothing about how it functions so they can't really do anything. This can be seen in our political systems where the outgoing governor or president recommends or even find a way to manipulate votes for the person he wants to take his seat because he is his relative or because he knows him. Other political leaders put their relatives as their subordinates or in positions next to their own so that they will have a greater chance of taking his seat when he vacates. This "favorites" of his can be found as ministers or commissioners without knowing Jack about what they are "ministering" or "commissioning", leading to further deterioration of the system.
In institutions like the education Institution which is among the most important sectors for the development of a country, it seems to be rampant there too. People who know nothing or care very less about education are put in this position. Just look at the situation we are in now, the ongoing strike and all, I really don't think that those in charge care about you education as they claim to.
What saddens me the most is not that the people put their favorites in this positions. It is completely fine to be a little selfish sometimes, what pains me that I most is that this is done at the expense of others. You put a person who knows nothing about what he's managing because you know him, while putting others in a detrimental state because of the incompetence exhibited by those in the leadership positions while those who are fit for the position are left out simply because of their background. ..when it isn't your place to put whoever you want because it isn't your personal business. Why do business moguls leave things to their children? That's because they own it. It is theirs and they are free to do whatever they wish to do with it.
The trend now is that poor people are giving it all up now, looking for alternatives elsewhere. Those whose patience has worn out thin are resorting to fraudulent ways to make it in life, many of them are degree or masters holders and then they're caught by the law and tagged criminals.... All these can be described in only one word.... Sad.
The purpose of human relationships.
In life, the people we meet are all for a purpose, those as close to us as our siblings or as distant to us as our mere acquaintances, whether we realize it or not. Our relationships, whether toxic or otherwise, is an avenue for us to learn more about ourselves and others as we progress and it doesn't really matter whether those relationships work out or not, once the purpose of the relationship is fulfilled, it ends either through death, separation or mutual acceptance of what happened. Strangers whom we have very little chance of meeting again leave us with impressions we may or may not realize unless we act them out.
I remember an incident where two people who are destined to meet met and once the purpose had been fulfilled, one of them died. This is something I think a lot of you can relate with. You meet a person and just when you start thinking that the person had come to stay because of how they make us feel loved, wanted, appreciated and push us to become the best versions of ourselves, just when it all starts making sense, just when we start to let go of all the past hurt and traumas and start appreciating what we have right here in front of us, just when everything starts getting into perspective, things take a turn we never expect. We either lose these people to the cold clutches of death, or they leave abruptly without a final word, or we find out they have just been pretending they care to suit their own selfish desires. They leave or become worse, leaving us feeling cursed, or not deserving the good things in life.
The people we meet, whether those we perceive as good people or bad people all serve a very important purpose in the journey of life, and they are all to be appreciated for the scars or love they left us with. There's no interaction between two souls that ends without at least one party learning something from the other, unless it is all fake. In fact even fake relationships have something to learn from if we care to pay attention.
Always aspiring to deliver the best in every relationship we find ourselves in is something that's good, we deliver our best not because our main aim is to get the best out of it, although that's will be appreciated a great deal. We deliver our best because we are ready to learn and love and even if the relationship is no more as it is always bound to happen no matter how long it takes, we are left with little regrets or sorrows. Always strive to deliver your best in every relationship you find yourself in, this not only make you more open hearted, but is also a means of self purification since your intentions are pure.
Thanks for reading.
Ulquiorra,
👻👻👻
Love and Sacrifice.
As we walk through life, we experience or take part in things with varying levels of importance. Important things naturally require more of our attention, time and effort while unimportant may also require that, but most of the time are less worth it. Sacrificing some things for others as we scale through away day is important in the sense that we learn to recognize our priorities better.
Life is all about sacrifice, without sacrifice there would be no love, without sacrifice success can only be imagined in the head but never materialized, without sacrifice the real value of things become blind to us. Sacrifice is what makes life worth living, as we know better what we live or and would probably die for, and a life without nothing to live or die for is not worth living at all. In sacrifice, we learn to suppress our baseless instincts and selfish desires for a higher cause, this goes a long way in helping us build a high level of self control and self mastery.
The spirit of sacrifice not only benefits us but those around us, it isn't all about comparing to things and then opting for the one with more benefits in the long run rather than the one which provides instant gratification. Sacrifice builds selflessness in us in that we give up things that otherwise will be beneficial to us just to make others happy. Sacrifice roots for placing others before one's self because of the love we have for them and how much we care about them, even if we don't care about them much, we still sacrifice just so they are happy, from this we can deduce that through sacrifice the purest human feelings are expressed. Love, the essence of our existence on earth, is based upon sacrifice, that's how divine the spirit of sacrifice is. It is intertwined with love. When you sacrifice small pleasures for greater things, it is called self-love. When you sacrifice your personal interests for other's well-being, it is called selflessness. All are related to relationships based on love, one with ourselves, the other with others.
So what's life without connections based on love? I can't imagine a life like that, but I for sure know that it wouldn't be worth living at all. I'd rather die than live such a life. Still, all those do not come without sacrifice. You don't expect ordinary relationships to become extraordinary without sacrificing for one another, people like to feel loved, people love Love, and that's one way to ensure that you maintain the connection, while waxing it stronger. You don't expect to be the best version of yourself is you are not willing to sacrifice your comfort zones for real growth, in my opinion that's one of the greatest sacrifice a human being can ever make, a sacrifice that feels excruciatingly painful at the beginning but in the long run, you'd be thankful you made that sacrifice.
The only things we should never sacrifice is the core values upon which we live our lives. The need for sacrifice necessitates us to examine those values closely, if they are worth having we retain them, otherwise we shed them away. The need for sacrifice can also serve as a means for proper self examination.
Thanks for reading.
Ulquiorra,
👻👻👻
Lead Image from Unsplash.com
My journey into silence : Shh! Dear mind.
Outer silence, inner turmoil.
Have you imagined a seemingly still water body with crashing waves just beneath the stillness? That was the next stage I encountered. The more I grew silent, the more I made more noise within. I started over thinking and as we all know, overthinking leads to depression. As I sank deeper into this state on a fateful day reality suddenly dawned, I didn't think it through, I didn't contemplate it, it just happened out of the blue like some sort of inspiration. It dawned on me that that's been my inner state all along: the always chattering, always thinking, always talking voice. All my outward noisiness were an attempt to ignore the work that needed to be done within. It had been all an attempt to quieten all the thoughts, but now that I no longer talk much, I decided to embark on the journey.
We get so absorbed in the outside walk that we sometimes forget the mess we've creating or are still creating on the inside. Things happen that we blame on others without considering that we might be the cause of the problem from day one.
Silence is peace:
It's no surprise that many people who seem to be happy are the saddest people on earth. You see a man gisting with friends, laughing with them, throwing parties and getting everyone drunk, a man who always has that charming killer smile a few days back, is suddenly reported to have committed suicide the next day and you just can wrap your head around why a "happy" man like that killed himself. You might even think that it is a lie and it's all staged murder to make it look like suicide.
Peace. He had no peace. His heart is always racing even with that smile, his thoughts are killing him and the reason he gets drunk is to bury those thoughts to prevent them from haunting him.
In the journey towards silence, we find that the real and lasting silence is that of the mind. Silence of the mind leads to clarity, clarity leads to wisdom and understanding. When this wisdom becomes deeply grounded in your heart, you become an enlightened being.
I must admit that it wasn't easy at all. I began my journey and to God be the glory, I had this gift of consistency. I dug into books regarding the topic and was lucky enough to get a Sufi online mentor. With time, it started becoming quieter and calmer inside. Also, I started facing alot of tests and temptations but I knew better than to throw it all away and prayed for the strength to keep on going. I soon reach a stage where I started seeing things. That was the point when the veil was lifted. I saw things in a go that would take normal people a lot of time to see. My brain became sharper and I felt lighter, my skin became lighter too and I felt happier. People thought that I suddenly became a genius little did they know that I just became brave enough to tap into what everyone already has deeply buried inside them : the ever flowing fountain of wisdom and love. I smiled whenever they say things like that without bothering to explain for they'd think that I have become some sort of Buddhist or enlightenment freak..
Silence is God:
In this state, you start seeing wonders. For God to manifest His presence within you you'll have to prepare your heart for Him and Him alone. Perform a general sanitation on your heart and mind. Unlearn past beliefs, rid your mind of toxic thoughts and unnecessary fantasies for it is in such hearts God finds a dwelling place. What more is there? You become an tools for God's work. Your ability to love without expectations increase unbelievably thereby freeing you from the shackles of one of human's most limiting flaws : expectations. You become happier and your energy levels increases. You might even feel it flowing out of you at times.
After all these, I got back to my social life but this time around, I am more self aware and know whatever the f**k is coming out of my mouth. Even my tone changed to become a calmer one. I became the person I have always wanted to be... A happy young man!
Thanks for reading.
Ulquiorra,
👻👻👻
My journey towards silence: the importance of shutting it.
Knowing when to shut the f*ck up has helped me in countless instances including reducing drastically the amounts of fu*k ups I have found myself in. I realized this at a very early age in life when I observed that there's no quicker way to blow up beautiful things than saying messed up stuff. Empty vessels make the loudest noise they say, well, they couldn't be more right!
When it comes to maintaining boundaries in relationships, it is indispensable to know when and where to keep quiet. Conversations can easily stir in a totally different direction and if you're still a novice in knowing when to shut up or is susceptible to, as my friend will say "vomiting rubbish", this can prove extremely difficult but we can start off by knowing when to talk.
In the seventeen years of my life, there were times I messed up owing to my mouth that used to run like a tap. I am a good keeper of secrets but anytime there's a get together among friends, most of whom are older than me, I talk alot and I mean alot!! It used to be a bad habit and people started taking me less seriously because of the irrelevances and unwelcomed "truths" I keep on talking. I realized later in life that one of the most beneficial knowledge one can ever acquire is the knowledge of silence.
Silence is chaotic.
I started my journey towards silence about a year ago. I first of all withdrew from most of my friends, those that make me say unnecessary things and learnt to value my personal time more. I became extremely silent that people started thinking I was depressed, I admit there was a time I became depressed because of the change I started encountering. I became more of a slowpoke when it came to talking because I had to process everything before letting a word come out of my oral orifice. I started appearing weird both to myself and my circle of friends so I had to become introverted. In class, I found it hard to concentrate and not only did I stop engaging in unnecessary conversations and saying unnecessary things, but also started ignoring people when they talk to me. I withdrew from group discussions as I became more sensitive to any form of noise. It was like a cocoon was slowly forming around me, making me feel isolated.
Silence is uncertain.
Although the duration of my depressive state was brief, it was also deep and painful. I started having thoughts of uncertainty that what I was doing was doing wasn't right and my friends would end up leaving me alone and I'd end up without friends. Thousands of thoughts like that kept on resurfacing and I became sure that what I was doing doesn't make any sense. I tried to become more like my former self as some of my friends have abandoned me but something inside me didn't allow me to become that person anymore. As much as I wanted to become that person, it still felt entirely scary to be that person, although I wasn't even sure why I was scared.
Silence is sentient.
As I grew more silent, I grew more observant. I became able to detect things and listen more to things I am quite sure I wouldn't pay attention to if it had been my former self. As I grew more silent, I took the backseat and I mean it literally. I used to sit in the front seat but I started sitting at the back since not many people there. I had to distance myself from people if I am to distance myself from noise. It was like a veil suddenly lifted and I saw things....
.... things that I would discuss in my next article.
Thanks for reading.
Ulquiorra,
👻👻👻
Dealing with the aftermath of the death of a loved one.
Do you remember when you used to tell that person whom you loved so much but lost to the clutches of death that you can't live without them? You do right? And here you're, still surviving even without them. Of course some of these people leave a void in our hearts that can be very difficult to fill in but again perhaps we're right when we said we can't live without them because the part of us which only them can relive has died alongside them, but still, we live.
Coping with the shock of the death of a loved one is one of the most difficult things on earth. After somehow managing to come to terms with the harsh reality that you will never see them again, you're then forced to keep staring at that reality right in the face for the rest of your life, you still somehow manage to convince yourself that everything will be alright, you tell yourself that they are in a better place, you tell yourself that they wouldn't want to see you suffer because of their demise, while this is mostly true because these are people who truly love you, it can be difficult to control the tears even when we try to control them, it seems out of our control. Passing through all the stages of grieve but at the end we become alright.
It is okay to grief.
When you lost a person, it is okay and even recommended for you to grieve. No one should deny you that right. I see people trying to console crying members of a deceased family member or friend telling them to stop crying that it's "okay". You don't tell them that because they aren't going to listen to you anyway and even if you tell them that it will be okay, if definitely isn't at that time. The best we can do for them is with grieve with them or be there for them while they grieve. There's a hidden beauty in grieving a loved one. It makes them realize the love they have for a person. Sometimes you never know how much you love a person until they are no more and you might even wonder why you loved the person this much and you learn to love those who are still in your life the more, so do not deny them this grief.
Losing a loved one makes us rethink our own lives.
Especially when those people lived a worthwhile life. When you hear people say good things about them, praise them and miss them, you rethink your own life. Want do you want people to remember you for when you die? Is it for the good or bad reasons? People perceive you the way you present yourself to them and will treat you accordingly, in or outside your presence. When those people used to inspire you a lot, you'd take the necessary steps into taking the advice or motivations they have once given to you, you might see it as paying your respect to them, but in the long run it contributes to your own growth.
At the end whenever we lost someone, the reminder that someday it would be our turn to go rings loud in our ears, if we're wise enough we make every single moment worth it, and strive in the best of our might to make it matter. So to anyone out there who's lost a good person in their life, miss them, cherish them for they will forever be in your hearts, but never forget the things they taught you and adhere by it strictly, let their efforts not be in vain. Let it serve as a positive reminder rather than a negative one.
Thank You for reading.
Ulquiorra,
👻👻👻
Leas image and that in article are from unsplash.com.
Rest on,Grand dad!
Good evening guys. I hope you all are doing very well. I am sorry I won't be able to post the continuation of my story today as something sad happened to me. I lost someone who's very dear to me, a mentor, role model and more.... My grandfather. He is a very old man and has been ill for as long as I have known him. You'd be surprised that despite his illness, he still did things he used to do before.
My grandfather died at the age of 102(yeah he's that old) and ironically today is his 103rd birthday so do I say he died ages 103 then? He is a good man, always playful even when during his last moments. Yesterday evening was the last time I heard him talk. He wanted to tell me a story like he usually does-in fact part of my love for fiction writing comes from his inspiring stories - but because I didn't want to stress him much I discouraged him. Even then he smiled broadly and went to sleep. He lives in with my uncle which is some distance away from my own house so I came back home after the visit. The news of his death reached me this morning when I woke up from sleep. He died peacefully in his sleep just like he wished. I didn't get to see his corpse but I attended the funeral prayers and was also part of the burials. The atmosphere wasn't that gloomy and I guess I know the reason why, this man was an old man, he's lived a very rewarding life, he has lived a life a lot of us can learn from. Although the house was a bit silent than usual every body soon went about their normal businesses after some time.
Did I cry?
Amidst the events of the ceremony, I did stop to cry and so did some family members. Even though we know that death is what's best for him now one can't help but fill even a tinge of pain in his heart. Separation from a loved one is always a painful happening and no matter the situation one will always feel bad, regardless. One of the things that made me cry is that I know it'd be very rare for me to come cross another like him. Grandpa was a rare gem. He lived a life of simplicity, honor, love and compassion. Perhaps that's the reason he lived so long, perhaps God made sure that he positively impacts more lives before He took him back to him.
I don't want to go on and on about him as I might end up writing a 30 minutes long article and I don't think most people would want to read all that, I am not the only person on read.cash you see. So thanks alot for reading my article today.
Ulquiorra,
👻👻👻
They came again 2..
Good evening guys and I am apologize for my inactivity and my delay in dropping the second episode of the story, **they came again.**I have been very busy with personal issues and thank God! All sorted out now!
Here is the link to the first episode if you haven't read it yet! https://read.cash/@Ulquiorra/they-came-again-5731ec1d
I woke up to see the blurry image over my head make way into the clear image of my dad. He looked a little bit startled as he stared at me and that startled me even more than I was already. "Is he really my dad?", I thought. It isn't surprising for a person to start doubting reality when he sees things that only appear in his dreams or at night.
"Are you okay son?", well, at least his voice doesn't sound startled as his face looked.
"yes dad". I muttered but deep down, I wasn't even sure if I was really okay. I then realized that the gunshots I heard before passing out weren't aimed at me but where aimed at those creatures. The grimy stain all over my shirt I presume was the blood of their leader. It reeked of evil. As if aware of what was going through my mind, dad asked,
"those things... , is this your first encounter with them?". If he had asked me without seeing them for himself, I would have answered yes, having seen them for himself there was no use of lying. Long ago, a fallen angel used to visit me at night. He'd come, wake me from my sleep and take me to some place out of this world on its back. It was a really thrilling experience and out of excitement, I had told my father but he had dismissed it as "an active imagination born from reading and writing horror and fantasy" which was what I loved doing, ever since I vowed never to tell him anything extraordinary I encounter again.
I said no. I told him about how they only appeared at night until today. I told him about the face licking and the paralysis they caused me. I told him everything without holding anything back. After emptying all I know about them he looked a bit worried but not confused, and that made me entertain the thought that he knew about them all along.
Dad walked towards the other end of the room where he rested his gun, an AK-47 to be precise and he came back to where I laid, "can you walk son?". Him arriving home without any prior call nor hint was one thing, him welding a sophisticated gun was another. The only gun I knew this man had in possession was a Dane gun with which we used to hunt deers in the mountains so it came as a surprise. I knew he must have been the one who shot those creatures dead but I hadn't the faintest clue he didn't use a Dane gun. Well, on second thoughts, it'd take more than a Dane gun to kill those mfs!!
We walked towards a cave some distance away from our house and there they were, all three, face down. They looked as good as dead. My dad bent down as if trying to look for something only him is capable of seeing. He looked up at me who was standing inches away from his and asked,
"do you have any idea what these are?"
I was right all along, the way he remained calm suggests that he knew something I don't. As much as I know, my dad might be a gentleman, but he isn't all that calm.
He took my silence for what it is ; a lack of knowledge of what's going on and proceeded,
"These are the Morlocks. They are from a time long gone and a time that's yet to come, they are from both the past and future", he stopped to look at my obviously confused face then explained "the Morlocks are the ancestors of humans and also the descendants, they are the beings that exist as the two extremes of human existence, they are a very impatient species. When we dream about our past lives or events that happened in the past, they use the dream as an avenue to travel to the present before it becomes interrupted", It made some sense now, almost all my dreams are from my childhood days when I was a happy young boy before my mother died from diabetes. He continued, "... from the present, they intend to look for their species from the future to propagate more species and take over the world".
Image Source https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Morlock%23:~:text%3DMorlocks%2520are%2520a%2520fictional%2520species,and%2520are%2520the%2520main%2520antagonists.&ved=2ahUKEwj6u8zpi6P3AhWwzIUKHU-OA0EQFnoECAsQBQ&usg=AOvVaw0N2dq-M9YLfE4ar_KaBVJ2
"Take over the world?" I asked yet again, confused.
"Yes son, and if that happens, you and I and everyone else will have to die..."
To be continued...
Thanks for reading,
Ulquiorra,
👻👻👻
They came again..
If you are reading this right now please I need your help. They usually only come at night but today, they had grown bolder and attack even during the day. My whole coping mechanism has just been shattered. I wanted to believe that it is all a bad dream since it used to happen when I am sleeping. They induce sleep paralysis before coming at me. They just stare, growl and lick my face and then leave me horror stricken. Never have they attacked me until today when they appeared during the day, with cutlasses and spears. They look more horrifying during the day probably because I never saw them clearly until today. They had four rows of teeth, the dentition of human on the inner rows and that of a tiger in the outer rows, their bodies were covered with grim substances that looked like cow dung only that it wasn't dripping. With a size twice as large as that of the average human, their hair hung low to their waist. They only wore loin cloths, making their lower body more prominent, their thighs were like that of elephants.
One of the three growled on sighting and threw a spear at me, the terror that shot through my body must have increased my sensory input because dodging that spear was pure lucky reflex. I jumped a large bucket that was quite deep and toppled in over, making it turn upside down with me now inside. He of course, saw me which made him came aggressively at me kicking the bucket and shattering it in one kick. I, too would have been shattered had it been the bucket wasn't made of iron but I managed to escape with a broken arm at the point of impact. I flew due to the blow, landing painful on my waist on the concrete floor. The other two growled on sighting me, launching towards me with a mighty cutlasses in their hands. Even the thought of trying to block the attack wasn't so foolish to pop up because I simply can't imagine how a frail guy like me could stop the blow. I dodged again but this time, I wasn't so lucky as the first dodge. One of the cutlass welders got me on my arm real deep. I yelped in pain like a puppy but still wasn't ready to die, enduring the pain I dragged myself to the nearest wall while clutching on my injured arm with the other one. I turned as faced them, staring at their large green eyes as they approach me. I had no more strength in me so I resigned to my fate as I silently muttered a prayer.
The one whose blow I dodge in the beginning seems to be their leader as he stopped the other two from approaching me, keeping the fact that he was bigger in size than any of them. He approached me himself and came right in front of me. He licked my face with his long pointed tongue like they used to do in my sleep. This disgusted and nauseated me so much I flinched and puked all his face. This seems to anger him as his face grew red, with large arteries bulging in his forehead. He licked the puke off his face and yeah... did some expression with his face that looked like a smile... or so I think. Taking out his knife as the other two watch, he made a tiny but deep cut on my face and then licked the blood. The other two watched with curiosity as if waiting for their turn to taste the blood and this, I thought, was the end of me. I hadn't planned to go this way. Although I had done some unpleasant things to people, it was undeserving. My mind wandered to some things I had done of which I am not proud of. I wish I could make amends. I wish I could tell my loved ones how much they mean to me. I wished I could spend my last moments with them.
Jolted from my regretful thoughts , I heard a gunshot, then my vision got blurry, then I passed out..
To be continued...
Ulquiorra,
👻👻👻
Illness, read.cash, the weather and I.
Illness.
The adverse effects of the hot weather ha finally reached me despite all the precautions I took, for those who read my last article about destiny, can I call this destiny since I tried at least not to get sick? Or maybe I didn't try enough?
The hot weather here is known to bring along some sort of fever that affects many people of all ages, often times it comes along with a rash on the neck or a boil on the head. I started feeling not so well on the night I last posted here and before I knew what was happening, I woke up with a full blown fever the next morning with rashes on my neck. I couldn't get out of bed to do anything as I felt so heavy and my head felt like thousand needles are moving back and forth. I slept off again and woke up 12pm, only then was I able to summon some courage and endurance to get up and do some things. The sad thing is that it keeps getting worse despite taking medications and I am starting to think it's not just about the heat but some underlying cause.
Read.cash.
As a new user here, I am aware that I have to engage more if I am to be recognized but by my fellow old and new users as well as the RandomRewarder. I have given it my best since the past four days I joined, which included subscribing to authors who write great contents, those whom I think share similar interests as me, replying to comments and articles as well as upvoting. Because of the illness however, I haven't been active for the past three or four days and I think that will delay the goals I have set for myself here on read.cash. Sometimes I would log into my read.cash account, make an attempt to at least read other's post even if I don't post on my own but the light from the screen feels blinding and I keep my phone down. In general, I have cut down the use of my phone very drastically due to the prickly feeling I feel when I look at a bright light.
The weather and I
I can't really say I hate the heat season because it is part of nature and you can't hate nature, but the heat season is the most inconveniencing for me. I simply cannot stand heat and that has nothing to do with my level of endurance. My skin can't just stand it. When there's a shortage of power and there's no fan to provide aeration, I go outside the house instead to sleep, I don't care how much mosquitoes there is outside. My tolerance for mosquitoes I much greater than that for heat. Living in the northern part of Nigeria, it takes a longer time for the heat to go compared to the southern, south-eastern and south-western parts of the country. The heat in the north can last up to three to five months which isn't the case in other regions of the country. These are the months I hate my region and wish I could become like a snake who sheds skin constantly. Not to mention the waves of fever that usually comes with the heat adding to the difficulty to go through it all.
However, I am happy the weather is showing signs of the arrival of rain. It had already rained in some places in the city so we are expecting the rain soon. I hope it will come sooner than I expect.
I am going to stop here for now guys,
Thanks for reading.
Ulquiorra,
👻👻👻.
Is it Destiny? No! It's fatalism
Good day everyone and welcome to another episode of Ulquiorra Writes. Thank you to all those who dropped their priceless comments and upvotes on my introductory article and second article, I am very grateful for the show of love and tokens of encouragement. Today I will be talking about something many of us believe in and many of us believe **not** in which is destiny.
Belief in destiny is the belief in predestination, that's to say that anything that happens is meant to be has already been arranged by a higher Being or the universe. If predestination is a thing, then that means every single action you take has already been willed to happen. I have one question that I am not yet clear with the general concept of destiny. I have read that it generally it translates to the end result of the a series of events, this means that if you end up marrying a girl you met yesterday then that's your destiny, with marriage been the end achieved result of the meeting. This doesn't include the series of events like dates, night outs, romantic trips, dinners and other stuff done in a relationship all meant to achieve the chief purpose of them ending up married which is the destiny. In another perspective, destiny is any little thing that happens in our lives and do not only have to do with higher causes. This is to say that if the couple went to a dinner and instead of ordering shrimp, they order tacos. This is also destiny. It has already been destined for them to eat tacos instead of shrimps. This perspective argues that destiny can apply to things as trivial as getting tacos for dinner instead of shrimps.
I somehow agree more to the former which says it only influences how things turn out in a grander scheme because there are things that we can actually change within our lives. Like in the example I gave of the couple who had tacos instead of shrimp, they can simply go to another restaurant if that's what they really want. They have a control over that. I like to think of that as an exercise of free will rather than destiny. You don't just decide not to go to work on Monday and say that you are destined not to go to work on Monday, you're only using your free will and that's what we call fatalism (when a person does things they should be responsible for but put it on destiny) but say, due to the absence of the person who missed going to work on Monday he got fired. That's something that's not in his immediate control. We can say safely that the person was destined to be fired because they willingly missed going to work.
I also agree to some extent with the perspective that says the concept of destiny also applies to seemingly trivial things because I am of the belief that little things sum up to big things. Those little things influence the overall outcome which has been destined, so is it safe to say that they are also part of the big plan?
I believe in predestination but this word destiny is misconstrued a lot that I can't blame those who do not believe in it at all. When things are out of your control, that's destiny or fate. When they are within your control but you chose to do nothing about it, then it's neglect or freewill, not destiny.
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Thanks for reading.
What do you think about destiny? Do you believe that's it's a thing or everything is just by happenstance? Does your believe the Cause and effect outweigh your believe in destiny? Feel free to drop your thoughts.
Lead image and image in article taken from unsplash.com
Ulquiorra
👻👻👻
I wet my bed again!!
*I darted towards the other side of the room in an attempt to avoid it but trust my mom, she'd mastered the art of manipulating even the longest of canes long ago before Pharaoh was born. The horsetail whip landed squarely on my back as the sound reverberated across the room, "tahhh!". It took tons of out-of-earth's realm willpower to suppress the scream lurking in my throat, even at that, I had to convert "scream energy" to "squeak energy" so I squeaked. I managed to avoid the next whip luckily, it sure would have ended my life.*
*"If I hear a noise from you ehn!! I will make sure you never cry again". My mom is of the habit of spanking you and then deny you the right to cry which you undeniably possess. It's like stepping on someone's feet and then deny the person cleaning it.*
*What have I done this time? It's another episode of my almost everyday experience, something I have been battling with since I was born. Something that disgusts me as much as it disgusts those around me... Bed-wetting.*
*Image source* https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nocturnal_enuresis&ved=2ahUKEwiKgMeag4r3AhXvgs4BHe_BC9QQFnoECAQQAQ&usg=AOvVaw3O9eDOAaOOE4A-AT6ishIR
*As a 17 year-old who still bedwets, it is an understatement to say that I am ashamed at myself. Having to wake up at 3:00am midnight on a mattress soon to turn into River Nile with million fangs of self-hate sinking into your being is the worst feeling ever. Having to get up to avoid drowning in the ocean you just created with dripping trousers to clean up the mess while risking getting caught by your mom who doesn't hesitate to give you beatings that could last you two lifetimes is another dread on its own. You scream, you alert the neighbours and then everyone knows about your bed wetting story. I was told that I suffer from Adult Nocturnal enuresis.*
*I don't know what I would do about it anymore. I have reduced my water intake during the evening time, made sure I urinate before going to bed, taking medications both orthodox and traditional, gone for therapy but nothing is helping at all! I have even tried staying up all night but you know that can't keep up for long. I am scared that this wouldn't go anytime soon. I am afraid that if it keeps on, everyone might end up knowing.*
*Mom says that's spiritual and sought help from native doctors. It did stop for two days. God! How elated I was. I felt renewed energy surging through me and I felt on top of the world. Like I could do anything I want to. However this only lasted for three days and it came back with full force, any other medicine collected didn't work..*
*This condition has affected my Self esteem alot. I get scared interacting with my friends because even though sometimes it might be imaginary, I feel like I am not clean enough and if I am go near them, they'll perceive the odor of urine and laugh at me. I luckily averted the situation of a classmate finding about my secret when he came to my house to collect notebooks. He sat on my bed and found something wet but I quickly said I accidentally spilled water on my bed before he even had the chance of giving me "that" look. Thankfully I already dabbed the area so it wasn't smelling. I pray such situation never happens again.*
*I have already resigned to my fate, but still, I have high hopes of overcoming this someday. I hope I do.*
PS: This is a work of fiction.
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What is nocturnal enuresis?
Nocturnal enuresis is the medical term for bedwetting. It is caused when a person loses control of his bladder and doesn't recognize his/her rhythm. It is mostly common among younger children but occurs in about 1 to 2% of adults. This could be due to an underlying disease or might even not be so in some cases. In some cases it is anxiety and stress.
What to do as an adult who has enuresis?
A person can take precautions like :
Reducing water intake some hours before bed time.
There are anticholinergic drugs that can help calm overly reactive bladders.
When all fails, an InterStim device can be implanted surgically which stimulates the sacral nerve, thereby alerting the person to go have a leak.
Therapy can also be very helpful.
Most of the times, it goes on its own with the passage of time.
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Thanks for reading.
Ulquiorra
👻👻👻👻
Introductory post: What I do.
For those who are familiar with the Bleach anime or Manga probably know where my username come from, but why did I choose it for a username? That's topic for another day as I want to make the introductory post simple and straight to the point.
My real name is Imran and I stumbled across read.cash some five hours ago. Did some research on it, read some cool articles and decided to give it a shot so here we are with me writing my first post. It seems it's gonna be an interesting journey for me because I have read articles that resonate with who I am, that means that I can actually gain a lot by being a member of this forum. The communities are so enlightening and the interactions seem genuine. Talents are displayed and love is shared. I would like to contribute to the growth and good vibes and tap from the growth as well.
Who am I?
As I stated earlier, my name is Imran Adam. I am a 17 year old dude living in the west African country of Nigeria. I am a second year medical student who schools in Bayero University Kano Nigeria. Some of you are probably thinking I am too young to be in the University and yeah, you aren't wrong at all, besides I think so too. The reason is that I started my schooling rather early but thankfully despite that, I haven't really experience any major challenges I thought my age would present and I am very thankful that I am living my dream because to be a doctor has always been part of my goals.
What do I do?
Well is that all there's to me, no. I am a reader and writer of fiction. My love for fictional writing can be dated back to when I was about five years old, then I would draw some sketches of matchstick men with comment boxes as a means of dialogue. I progressed into writing superhero stories in my high-school years but when I got into medschool, I switched it up. I started writing about medical cases in form of fictional stories which I intend to share here. I write about medical conditions that aren't that common because of their strangeness like syndromes and disorders. Along the line, my childhood trauma inspired me to start writing horror stories and I think I am doing good at it. I hope to improve my horror writing skills here and I bet, it's gonna be an adventure! I have wrote a couple those which I hope to share here starting from tomorrow! 😊
I also write about my life experiences but I guess that's not special as that's what journals are kept for, even if you don't keep a journal your experiences are well written in your head lol. However the experiences I have read here are really interesting ones.
My interests aside writing.
I don't have much things I am interested in aside writing but that doesn't mean I am boring, at least I think I am not 😃. I am interested in reading books but I guess that's pretty natural for a writer. I enjoy watching anime as they provide me a means of escape into another world but I am no weeb😂😂. I also love doing sports, basketball and badminton to be precise. I also play football but I am not very good at it despite it being the most common sport in my country.
I am social yet introverted, you can say I am a social introvert. I actually fix time to go network with people which is like about two to four hours a day and then I return to my cottage.
Well, I can't think of any other thing for now so I think I will have to stop here. This article wasn't pre-planned but is just being written now so here it is for today. Thanks for reading up to this point. I am really looking forward to useful interactions and making really cool friends here because from what I have seen, there are a lot of cool and good people here. Thanks for reading once again.
Ulquiorra,
👻👻👻
@Ulquiorra