Today we had a class on Purposive Communication and there was a surprise recitation. I had a mini panic attack but as time went by, I started to calm down HAHA. I even got told "very well said" in my answer to a question haha. So it's not as bad as it could have been.
Anyway, there was this one question that caught my attention. The professor asked us to explain the importance of communication in a relationship. By relationship, she meant in general and not just romantic relationships.
So I decided that it is a kinda good topic for an article since I was actually writing something similar to it before the class started.
There were a lot of answers given by my classmates, but from their explanations their answer all goes down to one simple fact- understanding each other.
Thank you so much to my wonderful sponsors.Communication during pandemic
One thing that I miss about face to face interaction is seeing the non-verbal cues in every communication. Virtual interaction is tiring. Trying to figure out the tone of the speaker through the words they type is difficult.
Most virtual interaction are done thru chats since that is the easiest way of being connected. It also has the added perk of being able to answer when you feel like it. But the con of this setup is that it is prone to misunderstandings.
This could actually be the reason why quaranflings (quarantine flings) bring a lot of heartbreaks for many people this pandemic. I have heard and read a lot of stories about it and while I find memes about it humorous, I know that there are actually people whose feelings got hurt in the process.
One common misunderstanding is when one side was expecting a serious relationship to come out after the talking stage while the other side was just casually talking with multiple people at the same time. Flirting with no label is probably the best term I could think for it.
That is the setup for many which led to some groups where clowns (people who make questionable relationship choices) get together to form a support group or a meme sharing group haha.
The common theme in this group is that people expected something more from the one they were talking to only to end up being left hanging. Some were ghosted, others were told they were the side chicks/guys, some realized they were just one of the 10 people, and other things like that.
I guess that if they communicated their intentions at the very start then some problems could have been avoided. Personally, I hate misunderstanding and I hate people who do not communicate their intentions clearly. I find that I lose interest quickly when that is the case.
There were times before when I would casually talk with someone, and then go with the flow of flirting lightly sometimes, always clear that we were just friends. But then after a few months, they would be asking me for label as if I was the one leading them on HAHA. It's not like they made their intentions known that they would like to develop a relationship like that someday so I was just treating them as I would treat a friend, and there they were thinking something else.
Moreover, I dislike it when someone expects the other to read their minds. I am not a mind reader, that's why I'm asking clarification questions HAHA. I hate when they dodge the question then feel sad about me not understanding their point. How could I understand when you're not telling me what the problem is?
If you want to have a good relationship with someone, the least you could do is be open in communicating with them. If you're going to show someone that you're only willing to talk with them when it's convenient with you, then don't be surprised if they see you as someone just to pass time with. I don't know why you would be hurt about that, when they're only treating you as you are treating them. Like if you want something that will last, tell that, so they can react accordingly instead of just keeping it to yourself then wondering why they left when you could not be bothered to explain your side.
Anyway, that is just an example in the romantic or casual relationships.
During the pandemic, communicating with your family becomes a must since you get to see each other everyday. I can say that I was not good with communicating with them before the pandemic. I always try to just ignore them and di my things, and sleep. The good thing is that during this pandemic, we as a family started to oearn how to communicate better with each other. I can now tell my parents to not keeo calling for me when I am in classes, and in turn they can tell me without getting mad to clean my room or my plates or anything. The same goes for my sisters, I can now enjoy a day without getting irritated with them, and they respect the time when we just want to be left alone.
For friends, it is especially hard communicating with them during the pandemic. At the start of it we had some virtual fun activities to do such as Telegram games like Werewolf, Uno, etc. But as time went by, we just could not keep up with keeping up with each other's lives. The good thing is that my circle of friends has worked on it a few years back so we do not take it personally when someone just left us on seen.
I was actually leaving their messages on read just until recently. I did not really have much energy to always keep messaging people but I still try of course.
Anyway, my point is that communicating what you're thinking, and feeling is what leads to having a better understanding of someone. You cannot just form a good foundation in a relationship if there is not understanding there.
There is nothing wrong with asking so you can understand better, and there is nothing wrong with telling someone you are uncomfortable with a lot of questions. Just remember that the person you are talkig to is not a mind reader. If you are going to ignore them and not give them explanations, then they will probably make one themselves, and you might not like the result of that. So best make yourself clear, right?
Closing words
I just want to put some random personal thing here on this article about today. I am so tired since we started class at 8:30AM and I just wanna sleep but I still have classes until 4:30PM. I started a lot of drafts today but this is the only one I managed to finish haha.
I feel so tired most times that I just keep napping at random times of the day HAHA. I think my playmate is getting sad that I keep refusing his invitation to play after I got the free skin HAHAHAHAHA. He'll get over it anyway.
Yeah, just wanted to write this article to remind yourselves to not be a clown HAHA. Remember exactly what you want and don't settle for less. I keep seeing posts about a cold Christmas season because they are single so they were like okay with just being someone's side chick/guy and just don't, okay? There's nothing fun in trying to ruin other people's relationship. Just find your own, it's not like there is a lack of supply. There are a lot of single people out there why would you want to go for someone taken already?
Anyway, that's all that I wanted to share today. I'll visit your articles whenever I can. In between naps, classes, and organizations' responsibilities, I barely have time to brush my hair HAHA so it might take me a while to read articles. Thank you for your patience.
Thank you for reading this article!
If you want to read some more articles of mine, I have monthly summaries here:
September 2021 Articles Summary
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Purposive Communication is one of the Gen Ed course in college. And it teaches us how to communicate effectively in any aspects of life.
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