It's a matter of Decision
03/23/2022
Nothing's more satisfying than knowing I did well, since yesterday. I was able to be productive, and followed a strictly no phone policy I created just for yesterday, and I was also able to sleep within my planned schedule!
Let me tell you how yesterday went.
Since there was a non-working holiday exclusive to the town where my workplace is located, I was so thrilled. Aside from the fact that I don't have to wake up early, which is a thing I really don't like, that meant more me time!
I enjoyed some good time with my phone as I started my morning. It was better because mom treated us some halo-halo, which costs $0.5 only. To those who don't know, it's a famous dessert here in the Philippines, which literally means "mix-mix" because it's a mixture of different sweet ingredients, such as sliced bananas, sugar, milk, and more, topped with some ube halaya and leche flan on top, with ice, of course.
I just watched some funny clips, as I always did whenever I want to waste some time, and then I got into business when 10 am came.
I first prepared all the clothes I have to wash, there were lots of them, as I recently bought some new clothes for less. I am a fan of thrifting, so buying branded clothes for a cheaper price was a big yes for me. A few weeks ago, a neighbor of ours sold some branded clothes which she was not able to use at all, or anymore, due to some reasons, maybe changes in style, or body figure, I think.
So, yeah, for approximately $10 only, I was able to buy at least six tops, and three nice pants, two of which are denim. They all look so stylish, and I love them so much.
I promised myself this year that I will work on my self-confidence, and following the style I've always wanted to do, is one of the things I should pursue. I am glad that I am improving, even maybe slowly, because I can now feel more confident expressing myself through my own style. Don't get me wrong, though. I am not some sassy type of person when styling. I am just more of a laidback, comfortable style, minimalism. I used to be so shy whenever people would comment on my look, so I did not have the courage to dress up as how I want. That was years ago. I was just contented wearing basic polos, pants, t-shirts, and some formal shoes, during the college years.
Now, I am trying to be more courageous. I don't know, it must only be me who's thinking of it as the big deal, knowing how big of a people pleaser I WAS back then. Fortunately, I am now more open about my style, not really caring now about what they may find weird in me. I still hear some say unusual things, like why I am more into oversized shirts, or black and other plain and neutral colors, or boxy pants, and whatever. I don't think about them that much anymore, and just focus on the compliments I receive. I feel like I am more me whenever I get to wear what I want. I am not into dresses, nor skirts, not because I hate wearing them—well, I can, and I sometimes do, but I prefer my own way better, and I think that's okay.
Anyway, why did I suddenly talk about fashion, when I am a self-proclaimed not so aware about what it is? LOL. For me, as long as I am comfortable, and it makes me confident, that's fashion for me, regardless if people may find my style tacky, weird, or lame. Right? Whatever.
OMG, my nonsense ramblings about fashion something has become so long. Where am I now?
Okay, so yeah, I consumed about three hours just doing the laundry alone, yet it was worth it. I was already so hungry, so I grabbed some lunch, and I felt sleepy, of course. That was almost siesta time, you know?
I was tempted to take a wee nap, more so, spend some minutes in my phone. But I knew too well those "few minutes" thing is just a scam.
So, even I feel sleepy and lethargic, I shooed away that feeling, and worked next on my cabinet. I had to remove some rarely used clothes so I could have more space for the new ones. I only have one small cabinet, so I am always trying to save space. Hopefully, I'd get to have my own room, and a big cabinet, or closet, when I become more financially able to. For now, I am settling with the limitations my current situation offers.
Re-organizing the cabinet is not always easy. I always do it, but I always take so long doing it to the same cabinet. It took me almost three hours, because I also did some other parts of the place, which is also messy.
I got to see some old notebooks of mine. It felt sentimental reading the amount of stuff I used to handwrite, whether they be poems, random dialogues, or some rants. And some college lessons, of course.
It feels good to be a student again, I just thought. Less the college life. Haha! I am traumatized, especially with the later part of my college years, which was full of crying moments, sleepless nights, suffocating pressure, financial setbacks, identity crisis, and all of the sufferings one can even think of. College days tested me the most, and I am not embarrassed to say that. So, if you'd ask me, I would like to come back to my highschool days, or elementary, too. Just skip college, LOL. It's fun to just play and play and still get in the top honors. Good old, childhood days.
I have heard from a song this one line that has always flashed in my mind, whenever I feel like I am in a crisis:
"Dreams come true, it's a matter of decision."And whenever I remember this line, somehow, I feel better. I think it's kind of comforting to know that a song tells me that I can make impossible happen, because it lies in my own hands. I just have to decide to work on it, and make sure I achieve it.
Every great thing starts from a single thought, after all. Right?
So, yeah, before I get so dramatic and all, Imma remind myself of this lyrics again. And just work, work, work, until I can say someday, that a dream has come to reality.
What's up, Wednesday!
A string of random thoughts that came with what's supposed to be just a simple story-telling, how you like that?
You know I love random talks, but ONLY through writing. Yes, no small talks in person, unless you're a close friend, maybe. Maybe.
Is this going anywhere? Let me end this here, before I open another portal of topic again. Thanks for reading me, I always appreciate it. Still got some bit of energy to read some more articles before I sleep. I hope you had a good day, wherever you are!
Again, before you forget, "Dreams come true, it's a matter of decision."
Until next time!
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To GOD be the glory.
Being able to sleep with our desired hours talaga eh nakakasaya lang ng damdamin ..ako minsan I congratulate myself lalo na pag 7 to 8 hours tulog ko haha.