Single Mom journey

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Avatar for alicecalope
2 years ago
Blog 7
Date :December 11,2021
Time :7:24

Being a single mom was never been an easy chapter of my life. If you had read my previous article about abortion will never be my option. You will know why I end up being a single mom at the age of 18.

One of the hardest parts of being a single mom is raising a child alone. Yes, I have my family but for me, I will have a better life away from them. My dad is a drunkard. He gets violent when he's drunk and that's the dilemma since I was a kid, my siblings and I has to run away from our house when our dad is drunk. It continue that way until I had my 1st born. That time I can't run away from our house because  I can't run away at night carrying my baby. All I can do was cry. I felt so frustrated that time. Questions left on my mind. Why do I have to suffer now my daughter will also experience what I experience since I was a kid. I even blame myself. If I didn't get pregnant I will never go back to my parent's house. That's what I wanted to do before. But of course, I never had any choice. I only have them at that time. After I decided to go back to my parent's place I never expect that the father of my baby will not follow me to my parent's place. Before I gave birth He supposes to follow me to my place but it never happened. He always finds excuses why he can't come. Going to prenatal checkups alone. When I gave birth to my daughter I only had my mom. He didn't even know that I hard time giving birth. I was scheduled for the Caesarian section around 2 pm because I was been laboring for a longer time and my daughter's poop was already inside my tummy. I remember I was praying and tears fall down my eyes asking God to guide me and help me to overcome that situation. An hour before my scheduled operation at exactly 1:15 pm I finally gave birth to my beautiful daughter. I remember trying my very best to push harder while the hospital staff was trying to help me, I even told myself that I don't care if it will my last breath as long as my daughter will be alive and safe. Finally, I made it. We're both safe. Since I lost lots of blood I needed four bags of blood but since we only have enough money and I have a rare type of blood which is Ab+ we decided to go home without doing the process of blood transfusion.

My 3 days old Daughter



After we arrived at the hospital, I wanted to rest and relax my body but no one will take care of my daughter, especially at night. The first few weeks after I gave birth  I realized that being a mom is never been an easy job. I am just glad my mom was there to guide me. After a month of giving birth I tried to contact the father of my baby If he can come before the Christening of my daughter, he told me he will try but He never showed up. I rest my case of trying to convince him to come over to my place. Later did I know that He already has a new live-in partner and his partner is already pregnant. So after knowing it, it was about time to move on and focus on taking care of my daughter. I am just blessed with so much milk supply on my breast so I never had a problem feeding my baby.

Christening day of my daughter


Days, weeks, and months pass by until my baby turned 1-year-old. I remember we just had a very simple celebration. I remember a friend of mine bought a cake for my daughter because I can't afford to buy it for her. I'm jobless and my parents are not wealthy. I started to work at the food factory near our house when my daughter is already 19 months old. I have to carry my daughter along with me going to work every day. It's never easy but I have to earn money so I can buy her daily needs.

My mom once told me that she will not allow me to work because no one will take care of my daughter. She will only allow me to work if my daughter turns 2 years old. So when the time she turn two and I got the chance to find a  better job in the city I have to leave my daughter as I can't bring her to work.


Leaving her is never been easy but I have to sacrifice so I can give her a better future. Imagine leaving her, knowing that my dad is violent when he gets drunk is a thing that always makes me worried. Till I have to shift another nature of job from sales lady to a secretary of the lending business. I had to bring my child with me because of my dad. My daughter is having a trauma. Whenever she will heard someone who will talk in a loud voice she is taught that that person is already mad and starting a fight. Then she will tremble. She had that trauma for how many years.

Photos from my past and recent jobs

I work in different jobs from saleslady, secretary, Promodiser, Push girl to my current job right now as Internet Cafe Attendant. Been working here since the year 2012 and since that time I had to bring my daughter with me to work. I work from 10 am to 10 pm. My daughter usually falls asleep before we go home.
We move to different houses from boarding houses to apartments to my parent's house, rent a house at my grandparent's house (father's side) to my grandparent's house (mother's side).

Old photos were taken at the computer shop where I work


I was in different relationships. Failed relationships. With mostly Filipino men and then I tried my luck with foreigners. I was engaged twice to my Danish and American boyfriends. But God gave me the right person who will be my last and that's my Filipino husband. Wanna know how did I meet him? Click here. Searching for the one for almost 13 years. My whole single mom journey is a roller coaster ride. I just have to make it short. You might get tired of reading my whole journey as it's full of trials and heartaches. And I am already emotional while writing this article.


Closing thoughts


Life might be full of trials and challenges but as they said it's not the load that breaks you down it's the way you carry it. Been trying to create and plan my life but it always turns out into a mess. I believe that everything happens for a reason and God's plans are always the best.

Photos used in this article are all owned by yours truly unless it is stated.

Check out my other articles :

How did I discover Cryptocurrency

How Noisecash/Bch change my life

Abortion will never be my option

Friends for keeps

How did I meet my husband

Addiction

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Avatar for alicecalope
2 years ago

Comments

Wow I can't imagine what you went through. Deserting b/f, hard labor, and drunken father. It just shows you are so strong as a person and have great mother love for your daughter. I can imagine going back was emotional.

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2 years ago

A lot of people say that I am a strong person. Well yeah I have to be strong for my daughter. And it takes time for me to finish this article because I get emotional remembering the past. Anyway thank you for taking your time go back this far and take time to read my 10 month old article.

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2 years ago

No problem I try to do what I say. I will revisit some more articles of your past but not today I have many articles to go through.. Unless you find it creepy 😂 I like you as an author and it's unfortunate we both have problems with our marriage.

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2 years ago

well, that's life. We choose our partner in life. All I can do is to longer my patience. that's what I've been doing for almost 3 years of being married. still short time together yet I've been through a lot with him.

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2 years ago

I wish it gets better for you two I really do.

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2 years ago

thank you sir

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2 years ago

feeling proud of your story, laban lng po time will come everything will be fine and life will be more happier than before

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2 years ago

Thank you

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2 years ago

God has a way of turning the situation around. The best people on earth do tend to be the one's without a perfect background.

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2 years ago

That's true. Those struggles and trials made me who I am today. Thank you

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2 years ago

I was also raised by a single mom and i know how hard yet how brave and strong single moms are. Salute to you for being strong and nice to know you have found the love of your life already.

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2 years ago

Thank you so much for your precious time. Thank you for the appreciation

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2 years ago

I don't like those guy who committed and left her GF .

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2 years ago

Yes they are scumbag

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2 years ago

I am proud of you sis that abortion is not an option for you even in that situation. your daughter is so lucky to have a mother like you. May she grows being a good daughter and an ate to your second born.

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2 years ago

thank you so much sis

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2 years ago

Same pala tayo ng napagdaanan sis na lasenggo ang tatay. Takot na takot din kami lagi pero di siya nananakit pero nakakatrauma padin yung paghiyaw hiyaw niya tuwing lasing.

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2 years ago

Nkakatakot nga sis. Na trauma yung anak ko

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2 years ago

Touching story , so much lesson to learn in this story. The readers should understand every details. Every point has an impact amd always remember that God has plan for us no matter how difficult our life is still there is always a brighter ways.

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2 years ago

thank you for dropping by Princeyahwe.I like your name. Anyway thank you for taking your time to read my Single mom journey

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2 years ago

you are a nice and strong woman. I talk with lots of girls from abroad but most of them are single mom. I don't understand why people leave his or her life partner?

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2 years ago

thank you so much for dropping by on my old article @Shawon130.Maybe they are not ready to face their obligation.

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2 years ago

Oh, your such a stromg woman..I've been in almost three failed relationship which cause me to much heartache before I find the one. I also known several single Mom, and girl, believe ako sa inyo.

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2 years ago

Salamat sis. Sorry sa late reply. Natamaan kasi ang Bohol ng super typhoon at wla kaming kuryente and no stable internet connection

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2 years ago

How are you po? Okay lng ba kayo?

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2 years ago

What a strong woman! I think your daughter is so blessed because she has a loving and hard-working mother like you. Same,yung papa ko po ay na adik narin sa alak at ang hirap patigilin

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2 years ago

Awwe sweet naman. Thank you sis. Titigil Lang siguro sila pag di na Kaya ng kanilang katawan

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2 years ago

Siguro nga po. Pag dasal nalang po natin na sana matauhan na sila na mali mga ginagawa nila. Hayyst:)

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2 years ago

You’ve been through a lot and really you are the best mom ever and you have a good heart… don’t look back at the past but what the future holds, your story touched my heart cause it’s never easy to train a child alone, and you are a hero for standing behind your daughter and never letting go..

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2 years ago

Thank you so for those sweet and kind words @King_Gozie

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2 years ago

Sana all tayu jan sayu sis madami talaga maiinggit sayu dahil dito. Dalata talaga keep going no even at the very very bad time, we need to keep moving. Happy for you ☺️

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2 years ago

Tama sis. Life must goes on. Trials Lang Yan.

Anyway thanks for dropping by

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2 years ago

Yun , a strong woman indeed, titigil lang yan papa mo sis sa kakainom kapag binawalan na yan ng doctor.

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2 years ago

Salamat sis. Hay naku pinagbawalan na nga kasi nalaman niyang high blood siya pero inom pa rin is layp

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2 years ago

You are doing great. Look, how well you brought up your daughter. And you are accomplishing so many things, this will continue. A big hug for you. Take care.

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2 years ago

Thank you so much my friend. Take care always. Love lots

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2 years ago

Nakakainspire ka namam sis. I have so much respect for you. Andaming trials but look where you at now. Also, meron kanang katuwang sa life ngayon na tlaga namang binigay sayo at sa daughter mo ni Lord. 💚 I'm so happy for you ☺

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2 years ago

Salamat sis. Happy ako kasi maraming nainspire sa story ko. And salamat sa respect sis. God's plans are always the best.

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2 years ago

It makes me feel every word you spit ate. It wasn't as easy so far, while reading I put myself into your situation. I feel like crying all night while carrying the baby and feels like hopeless. I don't know if I can make it through. This will be a struggle for being a new mom.

God never leave you sis. Despite the challenges that you've been through, you are still now standing with a better life. Aweeee You are so brave and I'm proud of you😊

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2 years ago

Aww. Teary eyes while reading your comment sis. Yes it's never been easy but it's all worth it. I am who I am today because of all the trials that I've been through. It made me more stronger of course by the help of our Almighty father. Thank you so much sis

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2 years ago

It's never easy but nalampasan mo lahat, salute to you for being brave 🥰😍 ans I'm happy for you at natagpuan mo din sa wakas ang iyong labidabs 🥰

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2 years ago

Salamat sis. God has his own reason why I have to go through all that trials in life and my reason din siya Kung bakit kami pinagtagpo ng aking labidabs, 😁😜🥰

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2 years ago

Pang MMK naman jud ni oi...

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2 years ago

Lol. Naglisud ko ug tiwas sis oi.sugod palang Gani nghilak nako. Sakit mn jud diay maflashback ang mga pang hitabo. Mao ng wala nlng nako gedetailed ug Taman ky mutaas na ug Taman ang storya.

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2 years ago

Same kana mag suwat ko bahin sa akong mama

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2 years ago

Lisud jud sis. Dli jud malikayan Maemotional

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2 years ago

I salute you for being so tough for the sake of your child Ma'am..😊 You are such an inspiration. Despite all the struggles, still you have your reasons to keep going. Continue fighting!💪 God is with you..

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2 years ago

I have to be strong for her as she only have me. Thank you so much and yes life must goes on no matter what happen. Amen to that. God is always there

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2 years ago

Omg! I'm getting emotional now being a single mom is really hard and I salute you for that

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2 years ago

Life is full of surprises. Sorry for making you feel emotional. Thank you so much your admiration.

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2 years ago

She's so pretty! OMG! I am so proud of youuuu! You're so brave sissssy! 😍

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2 years ago

Liwat sa mama sis LOL. Thank you sis. I have to be strong for my daughter

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2 years ago

Btw sis. Sa dp mo. Ikaw yan or anak mo?😅

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2 years ago

Yung curly hair sis? Ako Yan sis. Hehehe

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2 years ago

Being a single mom is never easy sis coz I was once a single mom too. Like yours, abortion is not an option for me too. Though I heard lots of negative words from other people I am still thankful that I have a family beside me who supported me in that stage of my life

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2 years ago

Salute to you sis. I am happy that you're blessed to have your supportive family. It's easy for other people to judge us. Being a single is not a big sin. We are a victim too. They should have understand that we never wish to be a single mom

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2 years ago

True sis, people judge us quickly because of what happened to us. We are just a victim of false promises of those guys who don't know how to take responsibilities with their actions.

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2 years ago

100 % correct

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2 years ago

very inspiring story about your journey for being a single mom sis. I myself also been experiencing that struggle. Very hard po talaga as in. But thanks God for having a supportive family as well. Be strong always sissy.

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2 years ago

Thank you for dropping by sissy.Stay strong ka lang sis.and I am happy to hear that you have your family as your support system

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2 years ago

I can't finish to read. I'm already crying. I feel what you been through even I'm not a mother cause I feel your experience together with my mom. Yung feeling na wala kang ibang matakbuhan at dahil bata pa ko wala din akong magawa kundi umiyak nalang din 😭

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2 years ago

aww. sorry for making u cry sis.anyway salute to your mom for raising a wonderful woman like you.Kaya nga di ko na inisa isa pa ung mga detailed jan kasi naiiyak na ako while writing this article

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2 years ago