Motivation: The Driving Force
I was observing my health yesterday as I developed temperature, my body was feeling hot, coupled with headache and my eyes were hurting me. I don´t know if it is due to the harmattan season or stressing my eyes in front of the system. I took some paracetamol and also shut down my system. Health is wealth, they say.
While strolling on my phone yesterday, I checked nairaland.com and I saw a particular post from a guy advising ladies not to get married not until they have one million or even 500,000 naira which is approximately $1000 or more.
This made me remember this guy because he looks familiar on a Whatsapp status where he was kind of giving advice to young guys including ladies to get out of their parents´ home at the age of 25 or below.
Inasmuch as it sounds like an advice or motivation if I want to call it, it is wrong to do that. This is what has led many people take the wrong step to make money because they want to be rich at a young age, they don´t want to listen to insult especially from their parents.
There was a movie I watched, the guy was the eldest and his mother frustrated him to look for money and to do what his mates are doing. The guy left home and did money ritual, he was bringing money home. He killed his younger sister and was about to kill his mother when the secret was exposed. He said his mother caused it by driving him to do what he never planned doing. Every parent should support their children and not let their motivation be a driving force into the wrong path. When a child isn´t successful as you expected, unless the child is lazy himself or herself, there should be support and not sending them out to do what others are doing. Doing what others are doing has led many people regretted it today and destroy their destinies.
I looked at the guy saying young children should try in one way to get out from their parents´ home at a particular age. Though it is true that one will never stay in his or her parent´s house forever but not when people are saying it in the wrong way or motive. Many children are making it while still in their parents´ house and they find their way. It is in our culture that we think it´s a taboo or bad luck to still be under your parent´s roof without doing anything, and it is also worse when parents are the driving force to make them do otherwise into making money.
This guy that was saying people should have millions or 500,000 naira before getting married is still a bachelor and according to some comments, one said there´s no relationship record of him. Well, I don´t want to know but my question is “has he not made more than millions himself? Why hasn´t he married yet?”
Money doesn´t guarantee marriage. Whether you have millions or not, marriage should not be based on that. I am not saying money is not good, but when someone is giving you a stipulated amount for you to get married, it is wrong. A man may have billions, when he is not ready for marriage, he will not take such steps. Waiting to have much money in your account before getting married is like you expecting a car to arrive before preparing for a journey, you will not move anywhere except you plan for the journey. When you have a stable job that is paying well and you are ready for marriage, you are good to go.
The guy thought he has motivated people but what if people are tempted to find this money at all means and got this million, when they get married, won´t they regret it later? "Afterall it is when you have millions or 500,000 naira, you can get married." People will definitely capitalize on him and his word which is wrong. He is supposed to say, they should try to get a stable job.
"All we dream and think about in this god damn country is money money money. You would think we are the richest people in the world and money is flowing in every corner of the country..
They keep mentioning millions like one can just wake up and make it, not knowing their words of motivation is a driving force for criminal intent in young boys especially yahoo boys. We are too unnecessarily vain in this country. That's why most of us celebrate almost everything ranging from building a house, buying an iphone and buying a car."
This is one of the comments and I agree with him. Money isn't grown anywhere and making money is not easy. And for you to think building a house, owning a car has guarantee you a happy marriage, you are deceiving yourself. You can have all these and still do not have the prerequisites to getting married.
"My mother always tells me, "Son if you have not finish feeding your self don't go and carry somebody daughter to marry. Because you can't feed her, soon a child will come in what will you do? "Marriage is not an easy job. It takes readiness to venture into it. From monetary wise, physiological fit, spiritual fit and all the essential fits I didn't mention. cheesy.
Forgot all this yeye advice of hitting millions before marriage. If you are well to do marry simple!"
Here is another comment too which I think it's also good. Though many people with different views to the statement. I saw other comments supporting the guy and telling all ladies to have money up to that amount. Yes, it is true because if you do not plan before entering into marriage, it will be a disaster but when someone is motivating or advising without emphasizing on his word for better understanding, people will misunderstand and take the wrong step.
You must be fit in all areas to be eligible for marriage. A lunatic person can never go into marriage. A rich but aggressive fellow who cannot control his emotion cannot venture into marriage. A billionaire without wisdom cannot enter into marriage. It takes one who is physically, emotionally, spiritually and financially fit or stable to get married. Without these qualifications, I am sorry, your money is nothing to help the home.
If you read to this stage, thank you so much. I appreciate it.
Photo by: Mufid Majnun on Unsplash
[January 05, 2021] (No 5 article)
This is serious....... having money is one thing on his own and having what it takes to get married is another thing. We can't have the two together, but luckily few people have it. There was a time a had a news about a President who was divorced by his wife, not because of money, but because they don't understood each other.
It's so sad seeing 15years of age getting married in my area, without thinking of their future and the future of the unborn kids. I would have blamed their parents, but most children of these days don't want to endure any discomfort from their parents or their siblings which makes them move out and get married easily.