Bullying as Love Language

First things first, do not judge this article solely based on its title, you will see the reason behind it as you progress on reading this article.

We, people, are unique from each other that even our way of showing love can differ from one another. I don't know how it happens but I guess, the way we love comes naturally from us or that it was influenced by our environment.

The most common type of showing love that I know of are the 5 Languages of Love or the 5 Different Ways to Show Love which are:

1. Words of Affirmation - based on my own understanding, in this kind of love language, people show their love through words and I just think that these kind of people are vocal about their feelings. They can show love through giving compliments, assurance and encouragement and the recipients of it are the kind of people who want to hear that they are loved. Most probably, this is your love language if you love saying compliments, encouragement and of course, words of affirmation. And if you are the kind of person who wants to be loved that way, one of your characteristics is that you always seek reassurance that you are loved.

2. Acts of Service - this kind of love is when someone performs an action from the other. May it be simple tasks like cleaning, cooking, driving or even running an errand for your partner, friend or family. By doing this, one person shows love and the other person feels love and it could be vice versa. People in this category likes to do things for others because somehow, that made them feel wanted, needed and important.

3. Receiving Gifts - people in this category feels validated whenever someone made an effort to give them a gift. It doesn't have to be extravagant or expensive, these people appreciates it whenever someone remembered to give them simple gifts or tokens. After all, it's the thought that counts. If you always anxiously wait for birthday and Christmas gifts, maybe this is your love language.

4. Quality Time - as obvious as it is, these are people who enjoys spending time with their loved ones. They don't depend on material things, bonding, talking and catching up with each other is already enough with them. They have fun and enjoy with each other's presence and just being together really brings them happiness.

5. Physical Touch - touchy people, this is for you. These are people who shows their love through touch, of course. They are cuddly, the love hugs, or even simple putting their hand on someone's shoulder. They constantly crave to be to be close to the person they love and they are the people who are most likely to show public display of affection.

If I were to describe how I love and how I want to be loved based on these five things I mentioned above, maybe my love language is acts of service because I love doing things for the people who are close to me. Though it sometimes gives me stress and additional work, I won't deny that it somehow made me feel wanted and I love the fact that someone is relying on me. There's also a hint of physical touch in me because though I am not really touchy, I really do like hugs and it is kind of my habit to put my hand on my friend's shoulders. Hehe

On the other hand, I also feel loved through words of affirmation. Receiving complements embarrasses me and I really do think that it is not a big deal but still, I also can't deny that I still appreciate it when people are also appreciating me. In addition, I think I somehow show love too through this category since I often act as the encourager on my circle of friends or even on our family.

How about you, where do you belong in all these 5 categories?

Going back to the title of this article, aside from the 5 languages of love I mentioned above, I believe that love cannot be limited only on those categories. Therefore, I conclude that we all have our own unique ways on how we show our love. And as for me, it happened to be bullying.

Don't get me wrong and hear me out first, it is actually not literally bullying. I don't know, I just get that because my friends always tell me that I am a bully. On my defense, only to them, I am only like that to them.

As I was saying, it was not really bullying wherein I have a victim which I seek to harm. It is never like that, I never intended to harm someone. On my case, it is more like a joke since I just usually twist their words and use it against them. You know, those petty fooling around which I think is pretty common between people who are really close to each other.

Most of the time, I just try to annoy them by not agreeing to them and proving that I am right. Or sometimes, it is simple as when they asked if they are cute or pretty, I'll flatly say no. Or most of the time, I have quite a lot of friends whose height are 9'2 (nahinto sa paglaki. LOL) so I call them minions. Hehe

I also don't know how to explain this but rest assured that I only do all of those things for fun and that I am not causing harm to any of my friends. After all, they wouldn't remain as my friends if I am bad to them, right? Hmm

This made me remember our unofficial 'bullying club' back when we were on junior high school. Again, that was just a joke and we just made that up. I even remember us printing a copy of our oath with all of the 'members' name on it and we even included our signature on. Such a good old days!

One last thing, I am also sensitive about the people whom I fool around with. I am well aware that there are really people who are sensitive and would take jokes seriously so I am also being careful not to speak words that could be offending to them.

I am lost for words on how will I explain this bullying but I hope that you get where I am coming from. And mind you, I am just all words, in the end, I am still the one getting hurt because when I joke around with them, they always retaliate with either a punch on my shoulders, or a hit on my head. LOL

To attest to all these things that I am saying, I am tagging these friends who knew me personally and also have first hand experience of this so-called 'bullying' of mine. Heya @trulySarah, @carisdaneym2, and @dziefem. May you not sell me on the comment section. LOL

Thanks for reading this far! Feel free to share your thoughts about this article on the comment section below.

:)