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Am I a cheater?

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Avatar for alicecalope
Written by   218
2 months ago
Blog:194-17th
Date :October 31,2022
Time :11:34 am

Cheating is not only base on having sex or an intimate relationship with someone but if you delete a convo so your partner will not know it's considered cheating.

I still communicate with my ex-boyfriend, remember my Ex-Canadian boyfriend who still cares for my daughter even up until now. Before I let my husband knows that we are still communicating but things change after hubby and I had a lot of misunderstandings, fights, and dramas in life. I had to hide from him that my ex is still supporting my daughter financially, especially for her education.

Here are my reasons why I don't let him know about the money.

Ego

I had to hide it because I am sure it will touch his ego if he knows that my ex is still acting like a father to my daughter knowing that he is supposed to be the one to do it. As he is now my husband.But sad to say he doesn't have a regular job. How can he support our financial needs?

Taking advantage

Yes, I am sure that if hubby knows about the money he will take advantage of it. I know his attitude. He is the kind of person who loves to receive and receive free goods and money. I know that because when our relationship just started I was the one who spend more money, I am like this when I love someone, I am happy to give yet I know that he is just taking advantage of everything he gets from me.

There was one time that I told him that my ex will send some birthday gift for my daughter, then hubby suddenly told me, I'm okay with a new phone. I was honestly shocked to hear that from him. He maybe expects me to spend my daughter's money on what he wants. I just ignore what he has said.

I've known my ex-boyfriend for almost a decade already and never I never tried to ask for any amount of money from him. He just usually offers to send money for my birthdays before or birthday of my daughter.

So last week, I didn't expect a response from my ex since it's been a while since the last time we talk. He then ask how are my kids so I told him they are okay.Ashee (my daughter ) will have their exam. Then he suddenly said that he will send for the tuition. I was honestly shocked because I didn't expect him to send money. He ask me when is the exam so I told him that will be on Friday. But then he will be traveling around that time coz he will be in Asia for work. So I told him he can send it in advance so Ashee can pay her tuition early. He sent the money last Wed. I didn't expect him to spend more than I need since he knows I only need P1776 for the tuition. He sent me P4199.56.I thank him for sending more than I need at least I can still have extra for next month's tuition fee. He reminded me not to spend the money on any other matters except for the tuition of my daughter. Of course, I will not use it for other matters.

Ending thoughts

I just don't want my hubby to know about the money coz I don't want to abuse the generosity of my ex for still sending money to my daughter. I am happy that I still have him who still cares for my daughter. I know it's not his obligation to pay the tuition fee for my daughter but I am glad that even now he still treats Ashee as his own daughter.

What do you think? I am considered cheating on my husband or what?

FYI:Hubby knows na before na nagpapadala si ex ng pera pero ano nga sinabi niya papabili ng bagong phone eh alam naman niyang intented for the needs ng daughter ko yung pera di para sa luho niya.kung kayo ba sa katayoan ko sasabihin pa rin ba ninyo kahit alam niyong aabusuhin lang ni hubby ang tulong na binibigay ni ex para sa daughter ko?

Anyway my daughter is di anak ni Hubby ha FYI lang.

To those who wanted or are interested to know more about what happened to my relationship with my ex and why we didn't end up together just feel free to read my old articles. It's a long story.

Meet my Canadian boyfriend-How our relationship started

Meet my Canadian boyfriend-Magkabilang Mundo

Meet my Canadian boyfriend-The Revelation

Meet my Canadian boyfriend-Open Relationship

Meet my Canadian boyfriend-We meet but not meant to be

Photos used in this article are all owned by yours truly unless it is stated.

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Avatar for alicecalope
Written by   218
2 months ago
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Comments

Ayaw nalang pag tell sa imong husband dae kay samot mag salig and worst pa kay pangayuon pa niya para palit sa iyang ganahan nga paliton.

$ 0.01
2 months ago

That's my main reason jud Dae nganong wa na nako siya pahibaw a ky magsalig unya abusado. My nalang Gani ky nakamatikod ko Daan nga ing Ana siya. Lisud na di ko maabusaran ang kamaayo sa akong ex.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

sa imong sitwasyon dzai, you are not a cheater. Also, mas practical naman ta ron knowing imong husband wala may work. So, ayaw jud pagsaba sa imong bana ana imong nadawat nga kwarta gikan sa imo ex. maayo kay buotan na imong ex canadian bf.

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Oi you are back. I know you have read the article about anang ako ex. He is one of a kind jud. Buotan ug generous.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

lage. sayang lang ba naay nahitabo niya. pero maayo nuon ok na sya.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Hala sayang noh at na amnesia yung boyfriend mong Canadian before kaloka parang sa drama lang ..sayang talaga siguro masaya ka now kung sya ang napangasawa mo. Feeling ko ang labo nang marriage mo talaga..iwan ko lang parang turn off kasi sakin na ikaw lahat nag shoulder nang expenses pwera na lang talaga kung exceptional ang situation pero kung lagi na lang parang di talaga sya maayos para sakin. Ang lalaki kasi ang padre de pamilya..he should be the one na maging provider.

Anyway wag mo na lang ipaalam sa kanya yan . Para naman sa anak mo, practicalan yan..kung wala naman silbi asawa mo in terms of financial support.

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Tama sis akala ko pag my asawa na ako gagaan at giginhawa na buhay ko pero kabaliktaran ang nangyari Mas lalong nagiging stress at magulo ang buhay ko. Yes my asawa ako pero hanggang Jan Lang kasi parang wala din naman. Thank you sis

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Alice I have so much to say and add. I'll save and come back a bit later to respond. But no I don't think it's cheating.

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Take your time sir..

$ 0.00
2 months ago

You had the early tale signs of what his intentions were when you told him. Some may argue you have to tell your partner everything. I don't necessarily believe that on all matters. I would do the same thing if I was in your situation. For the longest time we only had a joint checking account it drove me crazy. What's this? why you buy that? Bluh bluh. I'm the bread maker like you. My wife makes up very little of our income. She gets a monthly disability check which is small. Anyways I broke off and got my own checking account and got another job. Took a lot of criticism from her for that. Rarely do I use the joint account which is where the majority of the income is. Even in a marriage you need some privacy. Especially when it comes to sources of income. It's been less stressful since I had my own account. Cheating no, wanting to do what you want to with your income should be our choice. Of course tons goes to supporting family needs. In your case the donor asked you to use it for a certain cause and you should do that. I gave you your answer. Do you think I'm wrong for getting my own seperate account?

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Well I think you got my point sir. It's being practical as I am the bread winner and he doesn't have a regular job. He's supposed to be the one to work and provide for our family. Anyway you did a right decision on getting your own separate account. Just like you have said even in marriage you still need privacy and agree to that coz since I got married I learn not to tell my husband all the money that I have coz before when he knows everything that I have he spent a lot and not thinking of what we will spend for the next days or weeks. My salary is always not enough for our every needs and I never bother to tell him coz he can't help anyway. I just find my own ways to earn from my side hustles.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Not providing, no control, no idea what is needed not a good combination. I hope he is trying hard looking for a way to better provide for his family.

There's not many people who touch me with article that hits home with me. You have done this twice within a few days. All I can say is more to come for you!!

$ 0.00
2 months ago

He tried but no permanent job still not good. I don't know if ever he will be the one to work, I am not sure if he can provide all we need since he has vices, especially smoking.

Thank you so much, sir. I am not expecting people to understand my situation hence I am amazed at how other writers understand my point. I am thankful that I can share my thoughts about my personal agenda and gain some ideas and suggestions from other writers. Thank you so much sir for always taking the time to read my articles and also for sharing your blessings not only with me but also with other writers.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Your welcome. Not going to lie I understand because I'm much in a very similar situation. Everytime I learn more about your situation you add something that is the same for me. I'd be all for talking with you at some point via DM.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Oh I see. well if you wish to talk via DM you can tell me where I can contact you,it is somehow okay to talk to someone who has a the same situation

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Oh noise.app is fine. Maybe sometime in the next day or so. Thank you :)

$ 0.00
2 months ago

okay .just dm me in noise.app sir.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

No you should not classify yourself that you are cheating

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Okay

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Naalagaan ba nya yong daughter mo? Akala ko anak ni ex. If voluntary at wala namang malisya, okay lang naman siguro. Friends ganyan. Wala ba syang job for now?

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Naalagaan si daughter ni Who sis?ni ex ba? Si Canadian ex di niya anak si daughter itinuring lang niyang anak ito simula nung ngkakilala kami.Si hubby walang job .Minsan lang meron so walang regular work,,,ako lahat bahala sa expenses sa bahay

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Ni Canadian? Attached sa bata ano. Malalaki na siguro anak nya dati?

$ 0.00
2 months ago

mga 6 years pa si daughter nung ngkakilala kami ni Canadian pero we meet 3 years after kaming nagkakilala.nasa article ko sis kung bakit it takes 3 years bago kami ngkita and nung nagkita kami eh wala na kaming relationship kasi na amnesia si Canadian nung LDR pa kami at nakalimutan niya ako ang tanging naalala niya yung name ng daughter ko at yung bday ng Nanay ko.Basta mahabang kwento sis .For him he owe me something kasi if di siya nakidnap at nagka amnesia siguro masaya kami at tuloy yung plan namin pero everything was change after siyang makidnap.Di man niya mafeel na love niya ako pero he still care for me and for my daughter..

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Awwww 😭 tragic pero nangyari ano? Grabe may ganyan tlagang kwento. Yong halos magtampo ka na wala kang balita yon pala may nangyari na. Mabuti natandaan ka na ngayon?

$ 0.00
2 months ago

we just make new memories sis nung kami pa.I just told him kung ano past namin

$ 0.00
2 months ago

I can'tand won't judge yous sis but I know what you did was for the best. I'm very glad you are still in touch with him and is very kind to you and your daughter.

$ 0.01
2 months ago

siguro white lies akong gbuhat for the sake ra pud sa akong anak and for the sake nga dili maaubsaran ang kabuotan ni ex

$ 0.00
2 months ago

I dis agree. di li man na bakak kung dili ka mu deny and since wala sya nangutana, and wlaa ka nisulti niya it will remain nothing. kuan lang, wala lang ka nag saba sa iya kay wala sya nangutana (kung nihatag ba "utro" ug kwarta )

$ 0.00
2 months ago

got your point sis.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

hah aI'm glad youo do kay di dko ka explain .

$ 0.00
2 months ago

kana ako pares sis bisan pa siguro ug nakamatikod na nah siya he will not ask me syempre kahibaw siya unsa my iyang gkatampo sa pag skwela sa akong anak nga wala man..

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Everyone have their choice on how to live their lives but I will suggest you inform your husband because sometimes communicating with ex brings back memories, am sure is kind of difficult but just try thanks for sharing

$ 0.01
2 months ago

As I've written above hubby already knows that I am communicating with my ex it's not a secret and he also knows that ex send me money for my daughter before but then hubby was expecting me to buy a new phone from the money that is intended for my daughter.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

I think it's not cheating though ma'am, as long as di naman kayo nagf-flirt po he offers help voluntarily naman po for your daughter maybe he just truly cares for her and for you ma'am. Tsaka alam naman ng hubby mo but he's abusive na for the kindness of your ex when in fact he must be the one to work hard to support your daughter, so deleting your convo is protecting your ex from abuse he deserves to be treated well too.

$ 0.03
2 months ago

wala pong flirting kasi alam naman namin na we are communicating for the sake of my daughter.and tama po he cares for me and especially for my daughter kasi iniisip niya ung future ng anak ko.gets na gets mo talaga ang point ko sis.tama lang kasi na itago ko sa kanya kasi ayaw kong abusuhin ni hubby yung kabaitan ni ex.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

It's fine po ma'am I understand you po. I can see that your ex is a good man po.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Daming back story about sa amin ni ex kasi siya sumalba sa akin nung walang wala ako at binigyan niya akong ng 50k pampuhunan para my own business din ako dati.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Para sa akin, ok lng kasi be practical sis, since ndi ka naman nag-askmeh, ok lng secret mo kay hubby kasi kung ganun naman ugali nya, wag ka lng pahuhuli🤣

$ 0.01
2 months ago

dati alam naman niya sis pero after nung sinabi niya na papabili siya ng new phone galing sa pera ni Ex na intented naman for my daughter dun ko napag isip na aabusuhin niya ang kabaitan ni ex at ayaw ko yung mangyari dahil laking pasalamat ko nga dahil my care pa rin si ex sa anak ko eh

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Kya nga sis wag mo ng sabhn abusuhin naman at bka mmya utusan ka pa na humingi

$ 0.00
2 months ago

yun ang kinakatakot sis baka nag okay lang siya na magcomu kami ni ex para maka benefits din siya..

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Sis ,murag lisud ni imong gibuhat nga pagtago kay husband niml.Dili baya gyud forever nato matago og nila pa walay aso nga makumkom. Wata kabalo unsay mahimong epekto aning secret nimo sa inyong mag asawa. Maybe ,mas maayo nga makabalo siya ,ipasabot nalang ang imong rason nganong need nimo makipag communicate pa niya. Well,it just a piece of my advice pero decision gihapon nimo ang matuman as long as makatabang ni or walay negative nga epekto sa inyo .

$ 0.01
2 months ago

sis kahibaw naman daan si hubby nga tg comu mi ni Ex.tgbasa2x pa gani niya among convo.kahibaw sad siya before nga tg padala ug money si ex pero not this time kay lagi nakabantay nako nga murag mag abusar siya ug makahibaw siya nga until now tg support ghapun si ex sa akong anak,imagine giingnan ko niya before bag ong cellphone ra daw iyaha if magpadala si ex hoy diosko di ko ganahan nga abusaran niya ang kabuotan sa akong ex,kana akong bana sis muangay na ug libre,mao bitaw siguro niokay siya nako before ky mas ako may mugasto b4. and even if makahibaw pa siya and masuko siya unsa my mahimo niya nagpaka amahan ba siya sa akong eldest wala diba,if magkabuwag mi then be it.mao rana akong ghuwat nga magkabuwag mi.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Ay ,sakto rasad sis nga e secreto nimo ,di sad maayo moabusar ta sa usa ka tao.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

gani sis,didto nako narealize nga di maayo nga makahibaw siya nga tg padala si ex para ni daughter ky lagi mag abusar si hubby and di ko gusto nga abusaran nako ang kamaayo ni ex ky dili tanang tawo andam ghapun muhatag ug suporta bisan man nga naa nakoy own family

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Sorry to say this...I think it's ideal you tell your husband the whole thing, I mean try to explain things to him well. If he later finds out that your ex is still sending money, he may assume that cheating is going on between you and your ex

$ 0.01
2 months ago

he knows already that ex is sending me money before .As I have stated my reasons I don't want him to rely on the money that my ex is sending

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Sobrang bait niya pala sis kasi he knows that you have your own family na but still he continued supporting your daughter willingly.

$ 0.01
2 months ago

super kabuotan nga tawo sis ug manggiloy on ,kahibaw siya nga ako ry naay income .

$ 0.00
2 months ago

I think ate, you have to tell it to your hubby. And I think baka umaasa si ex mo na magiging okay kayo ulit ? U know, getting back to you ganern? Pero I think the best way is to open up your feelings, na sa pagtulong niya sainyo eh wala dapat don kapalit ha, kasi u know, kahit gaano mo kakilala ang isang tao, there will be a time na pwedeng masira yan. Saka I think itong ex mo hnd mo na sya ganun kakilala totally since nasa ibang lugar na sya eh, pwera na lang kung nag uusap kayu always?

$ 0.01
2 months ago

For me mas okay na e keep, as I keep reading some of her articles mdjo walang silbi yung asawa nya.. sorry to say kasi lagi nya sinasabi di sya mahal nang asawa nya..at sya lahat sa gastusin.. which is very odd kasi walang regular work. For me lang practikalan na lang tsaka yung ex naman nya walang ibang intention but for her daughters sake lang naman ata.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Natawa ako sa comment mo sis..My article pala ako about my ex sis at yung buong love story namin at kung bakit di naging kami,Basta it's a long story to tell pero walang makakaputol sa communication namin kahit sino pa man yan kasi for me malaki ang utang na loob ko sa taong yan .He is my hero.Basta hirap eexplain. Mahirap talaga intindihin kung bakit we still need to communicate pero alam na alam na ni hubby why I still have to talk to my ex.Ayaw ko lang kasing abusuhin ni hubby ang kabaitan ni Ex.I know kung anong ugali ni Hubby oportunista.

$ 0.00
2 months ago