@ZehraSky 16 November 2021

Drowning together

In the midst of the uncertainties, I faced I know that I can count on you to be there for me. You have proven time and time and again that you got my back, even when I just wanted to drown. Since the pandemic started, I was worried about how we will cope without us keeping each other afloat the tidal waves. For me the demons I fight are mostly inside. The monsters that I see in my reflections, or the shadow that follows me. But for you, the monsters are all around you, and some crept inside of your mind too. I often felt frustration when I see people saying that the online setup is the best, without even considering that maybe there are peopke stuck with their abusers 24/7 for how may nmmontgs now. I hate that I cannot offer a simple hug or a shoulder to cry on now because the means of communication is limited. We try to make do but I often fear that it is not enough. The nightmares plague my sleep. I try to sleep through it but they feel so real that I was afraid for a moment that they are true. I was afraid that you slept right through my fingers because I could not offer more. I can hear you refuting me immediately, saying that listening and giving you silent support is already enough. But is it truly enough if I can see the water slowly pulling you down? I know that the current is strong, and I know that you have been holding on tight for as long as you can. Would it be selfish if I ask you to try and fight longer? Would it be selfish to ask you to wait for a better future? I know the answer though. Because you showed me the right answer when I was the one drowning. When I was the one struggling to hold on to keep fighting, you were there. Even when I still felt the urge to give in to the waves and just sink underwater, I was hesitant to let your hands go. I doubted that things will get better but it did, for the most part. I still find myself spiraling our of control sometimes just thinking about your belief in me is enough. I wish that I could be there for you more. But how can I if you're the one who is begging me to stay away? Someday, I have trust in the Universe that it will give you enough courage to take the help I am offering. I do not want to wish you too much because it might be more weight on your shoulder instead of being a relief. But I know that there will come a day when you will be okay. I cling to that hope because I do not want to think about any alternative outcome. For now, I will do as you ask. And I will be always available for when you needed someone to talk to. I hope that for now, it will be enough. I do not care how long it will take you the first step in getting out of your cage, but know that I will be ready to help you. I know you know that I am here for you. And you know I know that you are doing your best to stay afloat too. In this situation, that is the only thing I could ask for. And the other things are just us hoping that this nightmare comes to an end soon. Closing words Think of it as either fiction or non-fiction. It is open to your interpretation. I just woke up from a nap, and suddenly the words write themselves down. I don't know exactly what I wrote, I just felt that it needed to be written. Maybe someone needed to read this or maybe I needed to write this down. Who knows? Thank you for reading this. I wish you are well. Take care of yourself. **Thank you for reading this article!** If you want to read some more articles of mine, I have monthly summaries here: **October 2021 Articles Summary** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/october-2021-articles-summary-1293a999 ****September 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/september-2021-articles-summary-7febda16 ****August 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/august-2021-articles-summary-cb068f97 ****July 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/july-2021-articles-summary-fc106569 ****June 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/june-2021-articles-summary-baeb334f ****May 2021 Articles Summary**** https://read.cash/@ZehraSky/may-2021-articles-summary-5ba6d0c7 To show my appreciation for the support that I have been receiving, please accept a small gift I prepared for the first reader. https://branch.wallet.bitcoin.com/qiQRy8OBdlb