2021 Reflection
I am still processing the fact that another year is about to come. Honestly, this year went by so fast that I barely have time to clearly think. One moment, I was hyping myself up for 2021 and then suddenly I am here not feeling that optimistic for 2022.
There were many instances this year where I felt overwhelming gratitude. Of course, there are days where I felt too drained to even whisper thank you to the winds.
This year is both a blessing and a challenge. 2020 was a surprise since the pandemic was something no one expected. So the consequent lockdown took a toll. But 2021 is a different kind of year. Everyone was already tired from 2020, and somehow everyone harbors a bit of faith that 2021 will be better.
Personally, I think that 2021 is more challenging than 2020. Back in 2020, I was still hopeful no matter how many months we were stuck inside. I thought of it as a much needed break from the fast pace of my life. But with 2021, when we crossed the one-year mark of lockdown in our country, I just felt drained from mostly staying inside.
2021 is a challenge because I bit more than I can chew. The many responsibilities that I took upon myself sounds fun and exciting at the start, but as I had to perform more and more tasks, it started to took its toll in me. From being the most productive I have been for the first half of the year, my productivity level went to hell.
Honestly, I did not know what I was thinking when I made rushed decisions about more responsibilities. But I do not regret those decisions. Well, I kinda wished I did not make a lot of those decisions but still, this experience offered me a valuable lesson.
I learn to pay attention to my energy level and work with what I do have. I cannot function on just determination alone, not when the stakes are not high and definitely not when I am so low on energy all the time.
Despite this challene though, 2021 is a huge blessing for me. This year opened up various opportunities that I never imagined I could have.
First off, I discovered noise.cash and read.cash. These sites helped in getting me back into writing again. Moreover, it offered me a safe space where I can share my random thoughts and experiences. The financial benefit these sites gave me are also something that I am grateful of.
Furthermore, my discovery of these sites led the start of my cryptocurrency journey. I used to be hesitant to start because I did not understand it. Thankfully, I learned and now I am wiser with my money than I had been before.
Next, 2021 is a year for self-discovery. I discovered hobbies that made me happy. I also tried to turn my hobbies into side hustles which resulted in another new discovery about myself.
I am not a business-minded person.
I do not have the patience to continuously try and make a sale. I am a bad seller because I definitely would understand why buyers would prefer a cheaper product. I do not also try to sell my product which is definitely not like a business-minded person.
So after a few months of trying, I finally admitted that managing a business is not something that I want to prioritize as of now. Sure, it would be nice to sell my projects but I would definitely need someone else to handle the business managing part since I am only good at creating things. Well it is not so bad since I managed to get profits despite stopping after a few months. I actually still have a lot of yarns left unused but the money I used for the yarns are already returned to me because of the sales I made.
This experience made me realize that I enjoy giving the projects I made to people I know more than selling them to strangers. So now, when someone ask me to made something for them, I just ask them to pay for the yarns that I will use as well as to not rush me to finish the piece.
Another thing that I learned this year is that I am not too much. In the past, it always felt like I am too much to others. I felt uncomrtable with the space I took up so I try to make myself as small as possible. Yet the feeling never went away because it was just my own insecurities clouding my perception of myself.
As I started my self-love journey, I learned to face who I am and to accept myself for who I am today (not for who I was or who I have the potential to be). I accepted myself as I am in the present and that action freed me from the prison of my self-hatred.
I learned that it is okay to be open and vulnerable. I learned that I am beautiful no matter what number is on the weighing scale. I learned that I deserve love without conditions.
My partner is definitely a big help in the realizations I have. I remember, I used to invest in a lot of tokens on smartBCH without even bothering to read the whitepaper. This carefree attitude changed when I talked to my partner about investments as he studies his investments well. So, I learned to be more picky with tthe projects I invest in. I still hold some meme tokens and tokens with no usecase but majority of my smartBCH portfolio is with projects that I believe will do well.
Moreover, because of how well he manages his own investments, I paid attention to how much I initially invested and took out my investment when I could so i can put it in other projects. This means that my portfolio on smartBCH are all profits at this point so I have no problem with just holding the tokens for years to come.
2021 also taught me how much I thrive with routine. At the first half of the year, I followed a routine and tried not to stray too far from it. It was a flexible routine so it was nice. But after a while, I started skipping this routine which led to many breakdowns. I also started to feel lost. Even now, I did not manage to get back into my routine due to my lack of self-control.
This reflection is actually helpful to me as I can see where I "failed" and succeeded this year. I know that I feel best with a routine that includes time for my hobbies. I also know that I do not feel good when all I do in my alone time is midlessly scroll.
So for 2022, I know that I want to focus on re-establishing a new routine and sticking with it. I am not so sure about how well I will do but I know that I am open to new experiences and lessons.
Thank you for reading this article!
If you want to read some more articles of mine, I have monthly summaries here:
September 2021 Articles Summary
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Masyadong maraming naganap ngsuong taon talaga ee but thanks heaven nakaya nating lahat. Fighting lang and sana maganda ang pasok ng 2023 sa lahat. I'm glad that even if a lot happened this year may magandang bagay pa rin na naidulot yun sayo, just like sakin din 🤗