Never Allow It.

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2 years ago

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Never allow anyone to make a life-changing decision for you especially because your life is at stake too. Most people don't know the consequences of their choices and they allow others to make decisions for them. You would have to ask yourself why you want to be a secondary character in your life's story when you should be the one driving it? A lot of people leave a lot to chances and think they can just depend solely on the experiences of others.

It's good that we have other people's experiences to depend on but we are expected to use those experiences as a guide and not completely give ourselves to those people because they have more experience than us. You are to make the decision about your life and not commit the entirety to someone else.

Most people want to replicate other people's results which is why they completely take advice from people without processing it. Because your parents have the best of marriage doesn't mean you should allow them to make the choice of who to marry for you. They can guide you, explain things to you and with all you have seen too, allow that to help you decide who you want to spend your life with. Times have changed and the world is getting more terrible with each passing day. You can't compare how people were back then to how people are now. When the only thing you have is a nail, then every problem would present itself to you as though they needed a hammer to fix it.

Times have changed and humans have devices several ways to be deceptive. We live in a time where people would look you in the eyes and tell you that they love you but they don't. Gone are the days when they would tell you that when people can't look you in the eyes, it means they are lying. Nowadays, they would look you straight in the eyes, lie about it and even make you believe their lies based on how sincere they are about that lie. It's a crazy world and that's why we need to tread with caution.

No man knows it all. No one has the wealth of experience alone to themselves as no one has the monopoly of knowledge as well. We live and learn and that means getting as much wisdom from others and fitting it into who you are and what you want, which would help you do what's best for yourself. It doesn't mean you would always be right, no, but at least you can be at peace with yourself knowing the decision was yours and there is no need to blame anyone else for it.

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It is easier for us to blame others for what should have been our decision but most people don't like looking into the mirror so they would rather have someone take the fall for what should have been their choice. Most people don't even know the value of their choices and the effect it has on them until they leave it to someone who has nothing to lose and they are now the one paying for the crime.

Before you allow someone to make a total decision for you, ask yourself, "Who would be at the receiving end of this if things go wrong?" "What would they stand to gain and what would I stand to lose if it didn't go well?" "Are they speaking based on current events or based on how things used to be?" When you ask yourself these questions, you can be sure that you won't only be serious about your life but would learn to make every decision your decision while seeking help nonetheless from others.

Your choice of partner, your choice of career, where to live, who to be friends with and so many other things, never forget that you have a lot more to lose than others if any of these goes wrong. So many people have made some of these mistakes and they are living in hell...spending their whole life chasing what they lost. There are some decisions that can be changed and there are some that cannot be changed. There are some that looked like they cannot be changed but would require you even losing so much just to change it but all these could have been avoided IF we choose to make decisions for ourselves and never allow others to make them for us.

I have known people who allowed their parents to pick a partner for them and things went wrong. We have seen others too that the parents picked for them and it worked out perfectly well. The bottom line is, make sure whatever anyone is proposing to you is something you would also love to go through with and give your best to, without blaming anyone else for that choice or decision. Life is short and we don't have a lifetime to make as many mistakes as we can. Some mistakes can even be the end of a life if care is not taken and it's not surprising why we have so many people falling into depression these days.

Thank you for your time.

My pen doesn't bleed, it speaks. I am love's chemical content in human form and that's why I advise people to take a dose of "Olawalium" daily. 🙈

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2 years ago

Comments

It really do baffles me how some persons want to make these life changing decisions for you and not letting take your stand on what you really need.

But looking at it from another angle, what of those persons that have no plans for there own life, is it bad trying to change their lives?

$ 0.03
2 years ago

There are people who don't even have plans but sometimes it's okay to let them come to terms with it on their own because pushing them might not help. We might think we are helping them but when they haven't built the capacity to handle things, they would crash.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Independent is the rights of human being. But we should use it perfectly.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Yes, we should. We should never allow others to make our decisions for us.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

It is good to listen to advice, especially from the wise one or parents but it is best to check if the advice is worth it, so as not to blame ourselves in the future.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Exactly... Everything needs to be checked and processed.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

There are cultures that the parents are the one who pick a partner for their children, but sometimes it ends up like a living hell. Most especially when they don't love each other, when they only married because of wealth. In my case, our parents allow us to choose who the person we wanted to marry. It should be us the one who'll pick.

$ 0.03
2 years ago

Exactly. Most parents try to use their time to judge the current time we are in..it doesn't work. What worked then might not work now due to how the world has evolved.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

We should learn to be more independent 🤗

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Exactly... In our choices and actions.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

we can accept all advises, but we should be the one who is ruling for ourselves and not them ..

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Yes, we can accept them but we have to decide what's worth using.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

True, we have the right to choose what wen wanted to do 💚

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Exactly. We must never allow important decisions about our lives to be taken by those who have nothing to lose.

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2 years ago

Not all advices we received will work for us. Oftentimes, it will bring us no good but sometimes it will. But yeah, it's okay to get advice so long as we still know what's best for us and what makes us happy.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Exactly... Let's sample opinions but decisions should be on our terms.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Whatever advice anyone gives is based on their own personal experience or opinion about the matter. Chances are they haven't experienced what you are experiencing or experienced it different. So what might work here may not work there

$ 0.03
2 years ago

This is beautiful. Yes, it's based on their own experience and what is good for the goose might not be good for the gander.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Decision making is a really big deal for every individual. Allowing others to choose your partner pa is the most dangerous of the decision making as it a a lifetime deal. Amazing writes sir, have a wonderful day. And I love your end quote.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

I am glad you enjoyed it. Thanks a lot for this.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

When it comes to marriage should it be something that people need to make decisions for you too? Like maybe seeing a lady and saying she will be ok for? Or seeing a guy and saying she will be ok for this girl? Because a friend wants to get marry and everyone up and down are just recommending women for him, this one is perfect this one is ok this one is good and all that. Because marriage to me that's a life-changing decision and people recommending someone to you is like you are not the one driving probably you are in the passenger seat or maybe the back seat of the car

$ 0.04
2 years ago

I love how you hit the nail on the head here. Absolutely spot on. Thanks for this.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Absolutely, well said. Why do we need others to drive our life, why do we need to have the secondary to dominate over our decision while they don't know the whole story. Really great thought Ola, 🤗 I appreciate it.

$ 0.03
2 years ago

I am glad you appreciate the thought, my friend. Thanks a lot.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

We just have to be wary of the kind of advice we accept from people. Chances are that when we fail, they would still be the one to blame us again, accusing us of missing an important piece of information in the advice

$ 0.03
2 years ago

That's humans for you. They would give you advice and still blame you for taking it without processing.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Truth we should learn how to make our own decisions and face the consequences of it no blaming to others. Whenever we did, we are already a mature being of taking responsibility ourselves.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

We must learn to make decisions and then take responsibilities for it. Love that.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Thanks dear. I have learned many thing in life from you. Keep writing.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

This means a lot to me. Thank you.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Your most welcome

$ 0.00
2 years ago

🤗🤗🤗😊

$ 0.00
2 years ago

It's our life, we should be the captain of our ship. Not others, then throw the blame on them things didn't work out as we expected.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Exactly, Lhes. Absolutely.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

That's right, all our life decisions are in our own hands. we may ask for advice, opinions, views from other people who we believe can be wise in giving advice. We hear, perceive, think. But, if what we are advised to accept turns out to be inappropriate, don't blame others

And vice versa, when other people ask us for advice. Don't push, don't feel our advice is the best and force them to follow our advice. We give our opinion. The rest, let them choose and make a decision

$ 0.03
2 years ago

I love this. No one should be forced to take advice and we must never force anyone to take ours too.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Really do people still let others choose for them in this century?

People should be allowed to make their own choices especially in matters like marriage that lasts a lifetime

$ 0.02
2 years ago

You'd be surprised as to how many people allow themselves to be shoved around.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

You are right boss, no one should ever allow such especially in this 21st century, most people have wise up especially when in a marriage aspect.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

I absolutely agree. We need to wise up.

$ 0.00
2 years ago