Dating and Academics, II.

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This is the second part of the post shared yesterday as promised and you can catch up with the first part here: Dating and Academics .

I enjoyed the engagement on the first part of this article and while others said they tried it and it worked for them, others said they tried it and it was a disaster. That's right and that is why I stressed the importance of having a partner with a like-mind; someone that values education as you do and wouldn't want to place unnecessary demands on you at the detriment of your studies. I also read of someone who dropped from First Class to Second Class in the comment section because he got entangled in a love web.

I mentioned the importance of knowing yourself. Some people can compartmentalize while some struggle with it. I love what someone says that it prepares us for the future when we learn how to manage the stress of education with that of a relationship because if we look at it carefully, we can't say we would always focus on one at a time because we would learn to compartmentalize.

After school, you would start working; for someone or yourself and you would need to still learn how to cope with relationships and your job. Same with when you marry as well, you would learn how to just as when you start having children. So for some, it's a good ground to learn how to, from school and for others, they still learn it later but focus on school first and that is not wrong either. It all depends on who you are and what works for you.

...continuation...

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What About Meal Time?:

I mentioned in the first part that no one is truly as busy as they claimed SOMETIMES because it depends on priority. At least no matter how busy we get, we can always make out time to eat. Why not factor your partner into your eating routine when you are too busy with school activities and of course, the purpose of this would be defeated if there is a distance between you two. This is only applicable for those who are in the same institution of learning.

Just like studying together, it's like using one stone to kill two birds because while eating or after you are done eating or as you are walking to where you'd both eat and after, while walking out, you can both engage in discussion, see each other, laugh and make fun of each other. You both are together to bond while also having time together which is cool.

Conversations should spring up while together and you should both make the most of that time. Your schedule should also include your eating time and that's why you need to factor your partner in as mentioned in the first part. This is to make up for the time you've both been apart hence the reason why you need to eat together and still, it won't affect your education.

It's easier to get distracted and want to take it further after meals but leave each other after your meals to get back to your studies as highlighted in your schedule expect you both have no classes afterwards. Understanding plays a huge part in this and when you have someone who values the things you value, it makes it easier. Discipline is important in this aspect because distraction is just a step away if you both get carried away.

Someone also shared her experience in the comment section of the first part where she said she got distracted because she has never loved anyone as deeply as she did then. The guy was okay but she dropped off the wagon. This is why having someone with a like mind helps. The guy didn't help and was simply enjoying his time with her while she suffers academically. I also blame this on communication because the guy should have known she was struggling and should have done his best to draw up a better schedule for her but as I have said, not many people can handle it so it's best if they focus on their academics for a while.

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Other distractions:

The funny thing is, as much as we claimed we don't have time for certain things, we always make out time for our phones, particularly social media. Having a scroll on Instagram can be addictive and you won't know how 2 hours of your life went which you could have channelled into your studies or even taking a walk with your partner or bonding on a video call with that person.

We seem to spend a huge amount of our time on social media and even when we are with our partner, rather than have meaningful conversations, all we do together is bedmatics and social media which makes the value of whatever you are trying to build be kicked to the curb. Those hours you use on your social media, channel it into something more productive and you would be thankful that you did. Make use of every time available to bond with your partner or do an assignment that you put off for tomorrow. Do it now so you can free up that time for your partner in your schedule.

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Never Forget Your Study:

I am reiterating that your education should take the center stage especially when you cannot balance both. Not everyone is strong enough to handle both so in this case when you have to choose between your books and your boyfriend or girlfriend, it's an obvious choice, your study must take the center stage.

There would always be a time that in all honesty, you would be indeed busy and if your partner cannot understand that then it's good enough reason for you to let go of such. This is why we need an understanding partner and the reason why I said we need to let go of those distractions so that when days like this come, it would be so easy for your partner to understand. It goes both ways and there would be days your partner would be so busy too and you just have to understand as well especially when you know they always free up time for you before now.

Find yourself an understanding partner who you also love and loves you back because it is pointless to spend all the time with your partner and your studies suffer for it. It's not wise and for the umpteenth time, know yourself and what works for you.

Thank you for your time.

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