Dealing with breakups!

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Written by
2 years ago

Breakups may be the most painful and emotional experiences in our lives; even if it is not our fault- whether we want to break up or not- it can deal a lot of damage to both our physical and emotional health. 

A breakup can turn your world upside-down, and if you are not careful, it may ruin you completely without even knowing what happened, and you are left with nothing but pain and regret.

Even though a relationship isn't good, you still feel pain when you separate from your significant other. It represents a loss in your relationship and all the dreams and commitments you and your partner shared.

Romance sometimes begins with excitement and hopes for the future, so where do you go when a relationship fails? You are left with nothing but a void in your heart; only disappointment, grief, and stress remain.

A breakup launches you into an unknown territory where you are isolated; nothing seems to be going well with you. Your relationship with others, your home, and your work is disrupted because your mind is not stable enough to manage things.

Your mind is uncertain of the future; what will your life be like from now on? Was it your fault? Are you enough/worth it? These questions will be in your mind for a long time, and you will find yourself constantly repeating the same questions over and over.

You are trapped in a never-ending circle, and you don't know what to do anymore.

Recovering from a breakup may take some time, and it may not be easy, but you must remind yourself that you can and will get through that experience because staying in it will only hurt you more, learn to move on with a new sense of hope and optimism for the future. 

When coping with breakups, you must recognize that it is ok to have different feelings; it is normal to feel sad, exhausted, angry, frustrated, and confused- even if these feelings are tense. 

Sometimes you will feel anxious about the future, but you should accept the reactions will lessen over time as you heal. 

Learn to give yourself a break, permit yourself to function, and feel at a less optimal level than you usually do, but only for a short period.

After a breakup/divorce, you will not be able to function as expected, and you will be less productive in your work; we are all human, and what makes us human is the fact that we have feelings; we all need time to heal, regroup and find energy.

Instead of staying alone, being depressed, share your feelings with your family and friends because this will help you get out of this period.

You could also join a support group to share your feelings with people who have had the same experiences as you had.

Isolating yourself won't do you any good; it will only raise your stress levels, reduce your concentration level, and get in the way of your work, relationships, health, and life. It would help if you never were afraid to seek help from others, especially when you are not in your best situation.

Grief is natural to all humans, and it is our minds telling us that we have lost something, and breakups involve the loss of so many things.

. The loss of your companion and the person you shared all your experiences, dreams, and goals with.

. Loss of the person who supported you when you were not in your best times, even when you were in a financial, social, or emotional crisis, they supported you.

Your partner was always there for you, so who do you go to now that they are gone.

Permitting yourself to feel the pain may be scary sometimes, and you will fear your emotions will be too intense or that you will be stuck in a dark place forever.

Remember that grieving is essential in healing yourself; the pain of grief helps you recover from breakups and problems, and no matter how intense your grief may be, it will never last forever.

Remind yourself that you still have a future; even if all your hopes and dreams with your partner are over, remember that you can still fulfill any dream you set out to accomplish even if your partner is no longer with you.

Encourage yourself with the hope that new dreams and goals with replace the new ones.'

It can be challenging to come to terms with a divorce/breakup, and don't expect to bounce back to your usual self immediately.

Ask anyone who has gone through a breakup, and they will tell you that even if there are bad days, good days will eventually come in the end.

"It may be easy to say it is over, but it may take years to understand it."

Thank you for reading!

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Written by
2 years ago

Comments

Yes, a break up takes time to heal. This is not only the break up of husband and wife, I think break ups in any other relationship is very painful and it requires a huge time to heal up.

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2 years ago

Exactly friend, Thank you for dropping by Insh; it is nice to see your comment.

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2 years ago

I didn't experience breakups but I bet that it is painful. May all the broken hearted people be healed. Grieving is part of the process and we should never invalidate our feelings.

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2 years ago

Exactly my friend, never cast your feelings away.

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2 years ago

True. I've experience it and its hard , I'm so down that time ,no one in my side because I didn't share it to anyone .One thing that I did is to pray and cry and cry for almost a week. And I realize that the person leave you is not the right for you, God will provide you a partner in a right time .

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2 years ago

That must have been so hard for you, and I am happy that you could accept it like it is. Thank you for dropping by, Miya!

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2 years ago

Your welcome!

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2 years ago

It took me 2 years to forget my first heartbreak but it didn't mean I wasted my life beating myself of it :) I continued living like nothing happened, although deep within, I was quite hurting, lol!

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Two years, you must have loved them, they lost you, you didn't lose them. At least you are way better and stronger now.

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2 years ago

Break-up might be hard to deal with at first, but time they say heals all wounds. Go out and continue your daily activities. Do what you love, you will soon meet someone amazing and the unpleasant memories will slowly fade away.

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2 years ago

That is 100% true, friend; even if it is hard to deal with the breakup, it is essential to stop hurting oneself because it won't do any good. Thank you for dropping by, glad to meet you!

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2 years ago

It takes time to get over a breakup, the time spent on the relationship instead of pursuing other things keeps on hunting one. Most times people end up blocking their heart from falling for another person.

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2 years ago

Yeah, it is not easy investing so much time in something only to get absolutely nothing; you only get hurt, which may cause severe heartbreak that leads you to hate others and close their heart to love.

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2 years ago

I haven't experienced breakup for my whole 20 years of living. My current partner/girlfriend/future wife, is my first girl and I will do anything for that thing not to happen on us.

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2 years ago

Hehe, I also pray it doesn't happen to both of you because you look so perfect together. Don't worry, it won't happen because you both love each other a lot; I can see that.

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2 years ago

Sincerely, it is not easy to be yourself after a break up but we do not have any option than to move on and expect the best relationship. It's hard but that doesn't mean we should be over depressed and hurt ourselves the more.

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2 years ago

I agree, hurting yourself over something that you can't change won't do you any good, it is better to move on.

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2 years ago

Just like they say, what doesn't kill you make you stronger. Break can be so heart-tearing, but it will be a thing of past in a couple of weeks or month. How you handle it determines its stay. My roommate in school back then once said know girl could break his heart, I laughed at him so hard cos he didn't know what love can do. When it happened, it almost made his academy useless.🤣🤣🤣

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2 years ago

Lol, you will never know the pain of love until you love somebody. I am sorry for your friend, he didn't deserve that to learn that way, but that is life.

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2 years ago

Breakup is one of the painful moments in life of both partners. It will give you a loneliness and pains. Changes will happen. It will make you so down.

Always remember, we need to move on. Step by step and you can learn from it. Everything will be turn into lightness. Everything will back to normal and to be fine. Just do the process of healing even one small steps. It's help you a lot to move forward and move on.

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2 years ago

Hehe, your words are so wise, Ramona; anyone passing through a breakup needs to read this.

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2 years ago

Isolating yourself won't do you any good - this is so true and it would be better to be with your truest friends.

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2 years ago

Loneliness will only deepen the wound, but staying with loved ones will always heal our scars.

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2 years ago

So many great points here.. never dated anyone to know the feeling of break up, but this is a well written post :)

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2 years ago

Hmm, maybe that is a good thing that you don't know the feeling. Happy new month Doll, thanks for dropping by, always a pleasure to see your comment.

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2 years ago

Love you :)

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2 years ago

You know, I'm still thankful that I haven't experience that extreme heartbreak because of relationship. And I don't think I will ever want to experience that. I'll avoid it if necessary.

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2 years ago

Hmm, I don't know about avoiding it because that may be impossible, but I hope you never have to go through it. I pray no one goes through it.

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2 years ago

Your article says it all, the advice you gave will really help one going through a breakup A problem shared is a problem solved, we shouldn't isolate but share what one is going through with loved ones

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2 years ago

Isolation never helps anyone; it only makes the situation worse. Talking about your feelings with the right people will help you heal; that is what I think.

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2 years ago

It is normal, because we are hurt, it takes time to recover after the great process of healing its like releasing a mew product, a new me. Sabi nga nila pag broken ka magpaganda. Ganernnn!

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2 years ago

Exactly, it may hurt you, but it will make you stronger if you choose to overcome it.

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2 years ago

It takes time to heal. Been there! It was hell.

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2 years ago

Hehe, I never expected that you have been through it. I am sure it must have been hell; the emotional and mental pain is so severe.

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2 years ago

It really takes time before you recover from break up, as it feels like you have also lost your future. The feelings was unbearable at first but once you overcome from it. You will just realized that you were stronger than you were before.

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2 years ago

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger; you will become stronger and better than before when you overcome it. Great seeing you again, Garreth.

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2 years ago

Being brokenhearted means you are weaken but after the process you will be healed and be strong again.

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2 years ago

Exactly dear, it won't be easy but eventually, you will get be your old self

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2 years ago

Coming from a fresh break-up is really a painful experience to the extent that you would wish to die for you to not feel the pain anymore. It is natural and normal because you have invested time, feelings and effort to that failed relationship. It may take time to move on but surely it will be worth it.

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2 years ago

Such wise words Mura! I love your explanation; it is painful to move on when you devoted so much to making the relationship work. It won't be easy letting go of the person you loved the most, but that is the best option. Letting go

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2 years ago