I Don't Want Another Child Soon

Joining random question prompts is just enjoyable that when I found mommy @Khing14 's article on random questions to a parent, even if I was still halfway through the article, I already decided to join.

Read her article here: Random Questions to a Parent

But first, check out these lovely sponsors:

• WHO TAKES CARE OF THE BUDGET?

Both of us do. Well, my husband has access to cash while I handle online transactions such as paying the bills online. Since I am not very good with cash as I carelessly spend them, he gets to hold whatever we have, we usually withdraw cash every week while I have access to the online wallets, there's still a negative side though because I am always tempted to buy things online. I am very close to deleting these online shops on my mobile device but I still have a few things to purchase, so maybe I will do that in the future but not now.

But don't get me wrong, whenever I purchase something, I'd inform the husband who usually would tell me if I need it, most of my purchases are for our baby so he always, most of the time agrees with it.

• WHAT DO YOU PREFER? NORMAL DELIVERY OR CAESARIAN?

I had been operated on due to abdominal ectopic pregnancy in 2017 and I have a long slice on my belly, it's not a bikini cut so you'd imagine how horrible it is plus I am keloidal. The operation was pretty much the same as the Caesarian operation and I wouldn't want to go through the same again especially that it takes a lot of time to heal than a normal delivery.

So when I got pregnant, the first thing that I asked my OB was if I can have a normal delivery. She checked my operation procedure and thankfully, it is fine for me to have a normal delivery. I was scared at first because I thought my body might not be able to do it but with the proper mindset and focal point, I was able to get Matti out via normal delivery, he was 4.5 kilos.

I jokingly told my husband that if I will get pregnant again, I will have to go through a CS delivery and he commented, oh we have to prepare a good amount of money for that then. It was just to scare him because really, I guess I can't have another child because of our age, but if it's God's will that we will be pregnant again, I'd still prefer a normal delivery because it is cheaper, heals faster, and I won't have side effects of the general anesthesia.

• HOW OLD WERE YOU WHEN YOU HAD YOUR FIRSTBORN?

My husband and I were both 32 when I gave birth to Matti. It's already a late one. Today, I thought it might have been better if I had a baby at a younger age, I might have had easy labor plus my body might have recovered much easily.

But, it also means we might not be able to provide everything that Matti needs. We were not ready, financially. So, God has all planned it out for us, He let us experience challenges too before He blessed us with a child. With us being prepared, we are now able to provide Matti a good life, better than if we had him earlier in our lives.

Today, all three of us are insured and that's a blessing we didn't know we could afford but God has been gracious to us. He also had provided us with a house, a vehicle which made my OB visits easier amidst the pandemic, he also had given us stable finances to cover all the needed things to be paid during pregnancy and postpartum.

• ARE YOU AND YOUR PARTNER MARRIED?

Yes, we had our civil wedding on February 24, 2015. We were in a relationship since 2008 which means, it waited for seven years before we got married. We had been in a long-distance relationship too during those years which I believe strengthened our love for each other.

We were college classmates back then from freshmen to senior year, we graduated in 2009. Overall, we had known each other for a while, had the same group of friends, joined the same groups during class projects, and also are on the same scholarship so we pretty much had known each other before we became a couple. But the years of being friends are not the same as when we were already a couple because it was different.

The characters and personalities had emerged, we had several fights, most of them were just simple ones which can easily be resolved but we also had big issues, there were several times when I thought I might not end up with him but in the end, God had intended us to be together indeed.

• CIVIL WEDDING OR CHURCH?

I never wanted a church wedding, I have nothing against it but I wanted a simple one, with just family. I don't want to wear a gown nor a grand one with us as the center of attention. I just wanted one that won't cost us a fortune, one which would make our marriage complete without complicated processes and it was given to us.

My husband and I only spent money for our document requirements such as the CENOMAR and I can't even remember now how much that was. During our Civil Wedding, we didn't pay anything for the lunch afterward, it was my husband's parents who spent on the food, my parents went to Oslob and never spent anything for us, not even a dime for the wedding, and that was what I wanted.

I have seen my brother spend a lot on his wedding. He even loaned for it to just become successful, I saw how stressful it was from booking flights for the bride's family, planning the wedding, and even during the wedding itself. I don't want to go through that even if my parents wanted me to, I explained it to them, and gladly, they understood.

• HOW MANY CHILDREN DO YOU WANT?

I always wanted two, a girl and a boy but I had been pregnant twice but only one successful pregnancy so I believe that's enough. My parents told me to try and have another one before I turn 35 but I don't want to, my husband and I don't want to because we both wanted full attention to Matti. Although we don't know what God's plan is, we hope that if we would have another child, it would be when Matti is big enough that I won't have a hard time taking care of two children.

For now, I don't want to have a baby because I am not yet done with the struggles of postpartum. Also, it is expensive to give birth, the insurance for the baby, not to mention the pain in giving birth. I just want to enjoy my motherhood with Matti.

• BREASTMILK OR FORMULA?

I am exclusively breastfeeding my baby and that means, breastmilk is the best. If you read the formula can or box, there must be something that states the same. There are just misconceptions of breastfeeding and formula feeding has been marketed because it means business.

Breastfeeding is definitely one that is earth-friendly, it has a lot of benefits to the baby, and the mother too! I wrote about this here as well:

Why I Decided to Exclusively Breastfeed - The Wonders of the Breastfeeding and Breastmilk

xoxo,

Mommy Jean