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You're Not Complimenting, You're Catcalling

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Avatar for Jinifer
Written by   141
1 month ago

I have read ate @Jeaneth 's article Should I Take The Blame? about her experience being harassed while walking alone. Then I also read ate @Yen's article I am not innocent and I know what it is about the girl being touched by an old man, as what her husband told her.

An issue like this isn't new to us. Every day lots of people are being harassed in any places around the world. People do catcalling at a random stranger and we know that catcalling is not a compliment, it is a form of harassment. Girls are not just the one who are being catcalled, boys, gays, young, old, no matter what your gender is or how old you are, people will still catcall you. Even those people who wear full covered clothes are still being catcalled.

Nothing's more scary than people who will calls you by name and then randomly calls you "hey, babe" "witwiw, sexy" "how much?" and the most common is "psst! 150". People think that they're giving compliments but they're not, they're actually making someone feel so very uncomfortable.


I can relate to the girl's reaction on the jeepney as to what ate Yen's husband told her about the girl. This happened to me just a couple of years ago. It was Sunday and I was on the bus back to our boarding house. I was wearing a white shirt and a black short that time, when I entered the bus, there were no available seats except at the back, where there were two seats. There was a guy at the window seat and he was sleeping, so I didn't mind him at all and I just sat there playing with my phone. We know that the bus is a bit shaky. When the bus was about to turn, I noticed him moving slowly towards me, but he was still sleeping. I don't know if he was truly asleep though. Then, until he slowly lent his head to my shoulder, and me being a good girl, I just let him sleep on my shoulder, because I thought that maybe he was so tired. He was just like me, or I guess he was 3 years older than me.

He slept on my shoulder for a couple of minutes, then all of a sudden he slowly put his hands in my legs. My heart began to race. I froze a bit, and I didn't know what to do. My heart began to race so fast. Then I get the urge to put his hands away as well as his head off my shoulder. But then he started to lend his head again. I started to feel nervous, so I looked for the conductor. My eyes were roaming around looking for the conductor, then I finally saw him. Luckily, he saw me, I didn't say a word, I just stared at him. Maybe he noticed that I was feeling uncomfortable, so he approached me. He then asked me if I knew the guy beside me, I immediately told him that I didn't know him. Without hesitation, he taps the guy's head and it wakes him up. He told the guy to sit on the other vacant seat in front. 

 

Then the conductor told me something. He said, "If you feel uncomfortable, don't hesitate to call someone, especially that you're a girl." My heart was still racing and all I said to him was "salamat kuya". 

 

I was so thankful for the conductor who helped me that time. I will never forget him. He's an angel sent from above. I hope that there are still guys who are the same as him.

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0100222021

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Avatar for Jinifer
Written by   141
1 month ago
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Comments

This is a serious issis he that should be dealt with, my sister had same encounter whilst walking on the street. It is really a bad and an unhealthy experience. So happy you got of that situation, he wasn't asleep just pretended to be.

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1 month ago

psst! 150 I had not heard of that so googled it - people really say that, I would hit someone if I heard them say that to any female!

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1 month ago

here in the Philippines, lots of people usually say that, no matter what your gender is. and it's so disgusting.

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1 month ago

Yes it is

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1 month ago

Buti malakas ang pakiramdam nung konduktor.. Nagets na nya agad na need mo ng help..

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1 month ago

super thankful talaga ako kay kuya eh. ilang beses ko na kasing tinulak yung lalake tas unti unting lalapit na naman yung ulo niya

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1 month ago

kapag talaga ang konduktor eh alerto malaking tulong. May mga naencounter na din ako sis personal experience. nakaback pack ako tapos pagsakay ko yung mamang nasa likod ko, binibuksan pala zipper ng bag ko..nakita ni kuyang konduktor sinita nya agad.,.,ayun baba si mama.

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1 month ago

Sa pinas, hndi tlga ako nag shoshort kpg lumalabas.. Sa loob ng bahay lng. Dami kc malicious at green minded.. Unlike dto sa hk sa kht ano pwd ko isuot. Wala pakialamanan mga tao.. Wala dn cat calling.

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1 month ago

dito sa pinas madami din kasi mga pakialamara tas mga malicious, pati nga mga naka bikini sa beach pinupuna. hayst.

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1 month ago

Pag pinas talaga, ay naku. Nak shorts ka lang sasabihan ka nang pokpok at babastusin. Buti na lang mabait yung conductor, yung mga conductor kasi samin sa ticket lang palagi nakatingin. Haha.

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1 month ago

truee super mga bastos, kahit naka shorts lang e jujudge na.

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1 month ago

Di yan obra sakin. I had a similar experience! Style nya bulok. Tinusok ko ng pin taz sinuntok ko lol! Buti di nagviral wala pang masyadong phone nun eh . Nakajacket nako nyan ha? Boots and jeans. What more if nakashorts? Pero dito samin, khit naka 2 piece normal lang. Depende din cguro sa place?

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1 month ago

depende din po talaga sa lugar kung yung mga tao may respeto sa ibang tao. nasa tao na rin po kasi kung manyak sila, manyak na talaga sila. Bat ba kasi hindi nila ma control yung libog nila, hayst nakaka diri

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1 month ago

We really can't assure our security from people who don't know how to respect us. People seem to be vaguely harmless but we do not know what runs in their heads. We have to be extra careful many people can take advantage of our weaknesses. We should just ignore those people who call us names, they should not be tolerated because it is traumatizing.

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1 month ago

true, we really don't know what runs into their head, they may look innocent but we don't know what they're capable of.

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1 month ago

That's why we have to be careful and be vigilant of our surroundings. Anytime we could be a victim and their target.

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1 month ago

I didn't even know it is called catcalling, it seems I have learnt something new today. I have a friend that does this a lot, and it's truly disgusting

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1 month ago

they are truly disgusting

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1 month ago

The annoying thing is some guys think it's funny and harmless

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1 month ago

they think that they're giving compliments to someone by saying sexy, but the truth is they're not and it is so disturbing and creepy.

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1 month ago

Exactly

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1 month ago

One thing I can leave lose is my respect for the female genders, I don't know why some guys disrespect most ladies.

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1 month ago

it's just that some people don't know what respect is.

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1 month ago

Buti nalang may nagmagandang loob no. As catcalling Naman naku nakakairita Yan. Dati ayaw na ayaw ko bibili sa tindahan Lalo na kung puro tambay Kasi Alam ko na mangyayari.

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User's avatar Yen
1 month ago

nakakainis kasi talaga yung ganyan eh, nakaka bwisit

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1 month ago

Girls should always have the habit of speaking their mind out whenever they are feeling uncomfortable, it's good you spoke to the conductor and he knew you weren't comfortable.

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1 month ago

Oh My G, thanks to manong kundoktor at nanotice nya goodness. Kunyare tulog ampt pero naglalakbay ang kamay kagaling 🙄 sana ikaw nalang ang lumipat ng upuan tas tinapakan ang paa deserve naman nya ee.

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1 month ago

if only i have the courage that time ate, kaya lang sobrang takot ko kasi nong time na yun eh

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1 month ago

It's very alarming to know that guys nowadays doesn't have respect for girls they gonna do actions that will make a girl uncomfortable. It's very important to confront nor ask the help of others once there are people who harassing you.

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1 month ago

it's too rare to find someone who has huge respect for women

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1 month ago

I salute the conductor for helping you get out of that situation with that guy who doesn't even know the word respect 😫 haist. They don't know how traumatizing it would be, that's why they can do it whenever or wherever they want.

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1 month ago

they're the worst and gross.

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1 month ago

That was so embarrassing or it feels so uncomfortable. The conductor is right po ate don't hesitate to call somebody especially yung nagyari sayo.

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1 month ago

That's why hindi talaga ako nag susuot ng mga maiikli. Tsaka pinapangitan ko sarili ko kapag asa labas ako para layuan ako nila 😂 HAHA ayoko kasi talaga ng nadidikit sa mga lalaki even to my exs. may One inch or 2 inches apart. Tsaka dito samin, kilala ako na apo ako ng dating kapitan kaya never sila nang gaganyan. Diko din sila close kasi alam naman nilang suplada talaga ako non pa ate ko lang close nila lol pero mas mainam na din yung mag isa at nilalayuan at pinapanindirihan kasi baduy ka, kesa yung nababastos ka. Sa panahon ngayon kasi hindi na safe talaga.

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1 month ago

kahit naka cover pa buong katawan natin, kung manyak yung tao, gagawa at gagawa padin talaga yan ng mga bagay na hindi mabuti. kahit nga mga pulubi pinapatulan eh :<

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1 month ago

It’s really uncomfortable and glitchy. But some people feel it funny. How dare they?

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1 month ago

A lot of girls experience this already, it's just sad that it's still happening until now. Good thing the conductor notice your uncomfortableness 🥺

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1 month ago

Que bueno que el chófer te noto un tanto incomoda. Que momento para ti me imagino dios. Linda mañana te deseo

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1 month ago

The konduktor guy must have felt that you're asking his help. He has a strong sense of empathy. Kudos to him. To that pervert guy, pakyu!

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1 month ago

In your case I think the guy was still sleeping but you should have tapped him to wake up or pushed his head off your shoulder; instead of being scared.

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1 month ago

easier said than done.

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1 month ago

I don't get it.

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1 month ago