Why you should not feel pity for those around you!

30.01.2022. In this world we often encounter and hear about pity. We sometimes cannot even give a coherent explanation of what this feeling is, but we continue to feel it for the world, ourselves, and others.

Pity is a feeling associated with negative experiences and an enduring sense of discomfort that we direct toward ourselves or another person.

Pity often takes the form of condescending compassion.

Stop feeling sorry for others pity is almost mercy. It is a sign of humanity. Well, how can you pass by the weak, the wretched, the destitute and not feel pity for them? Let's keep silent about the helping hand. It is repugnant to stretch out to them. But to show ourselves empathizing, sigh and mimic compassion - it is necessary. Otherwise, others will not understand.

So. Don't. People around us don't really care. They have enough problems of their own. And they have other things to think about besides your abusive behavior.

Pity is the most dangerous feeling you can have. It destroys you from within. And pity is a hook for manipulators, on which it is almost impossible to escape. When there is nothing else to hook you, they hook you with pity.

The worst thing is that many people are taught pity and compassion from childhood. And in response, you also expect someone to take pity and lend a helping hand. It turns out that they teach you to succumb to manipulation, but not to resist it.

How many times have you heard from someone about how hard life is? Problems weighing down their lives? Lost health that doesn't allow you to live your life to the fullest? What have you experienced? 

Let me guess. At first it was banal pity. You experienced this disgusting feeling and forgot. Then it became embarrassing. You have other problems, less global. And then the interfering desire to live a normal life to help. At least somehow, if only not to hear these laments in the future.

They helped. Once, twice. But the answer was more complaints and suffering. More than before. At some point you catch yourself that you help not because you want to, but because you have to. And then the resentment, if suddenly you could not, did not have time, did not give up his life for the sake of another person. Admit it: have you ever done that?

Manipulation of pity is the most trivial and the most effective. It works in both directions. Either you pity yourself, thereby manipulating those around you. Or those around you manipulate you, causing pity. One hundred percent effective. Used to be.

Now it happens less and less often.  People stop feeling sorry for each other. The smart ones stop feeling sorry for themselves.

Maybe it helps that they began to talk about the harm of pity. And maybe people understand that everyone chooses how to live: at the expense of others, causing pity, or by their own efforts, putting emotions aside.

In any case, pity must be fought. Stop feeling sorry for others and for yourself. It's a waste of time, and often even more power and money. While you indulge in this destructive feeling nothing happens. If a person needs help - he should say so directly. If he needs to be pitied, let him go to a professional and pay money for it.

And stop confusing pity with compassion. If the person has really had something negative happen - show compassion. Support him in a difficult moment, warm him with the warmth of your soul. He needs it, and this is not manipulation. This is humanity. Just do not feel pity.

Self-pity is the most destructive thing you can experience. It is always a state of victimhood. In this position you will successfully attract people who will safely take advantage of this and contribute to the destruction of you as a person further. It is very difficult, painful and time-consuming to get out of it. It's easier not to get caught. 

And if you really want to, take pity on yourself, wrapped in a plaid with a cup of warm tea. But feel sorry for yourself knowing that this is only today, only now. And tomorrow you will go out into the world a confident person, who gives everything easily.

Pity is almost contempt. But sometimes it is so lacking......

Image sources: diets.ru pixabay.com

I thank God for his help in writing this article, and you, dear readers, praise him if your reading has been helpful to you.

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