Final goodbye. The inevitable.

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2 years ago

What can I say? Nothing lasts forever except "nothing." Change is constant and with change comes the end of things - for this matter, life.

Seeing the remains of our grandfather placed in his tomb it's like mourning him for the second time.

For the last time, a service was held earlier today, a service of comfort for the family. It's an emotional day. I was trying to hold back tears and trying to keep it in. We were joking and laughing throughout the day but behind all those was sadness.

I was not there yesterday. Last night was the bulk of the preparation for food. Pigs and chicken were butchered as was the custom. Other food was also prepared. I didn't take photos for I would rather focus my time with relatives and the family.

Emotions ran high especially so because alcoholic drinks were involved. Family drama is always present in times like this. We all know how it goes. As much as we want harmony, there will always be those who likes arguments and cause trouble.

Why can't we not think of ourselves for once? Even for just one day. Why is one day so hard to sacrifice for our family? You were not there when they are alive. Yes, there's no use for showing concern when they passed for they can no longer see and feel it. However, humble yourselves for once. Don't let pride and ego rule you. The world does not revolve around you.

I woke up really early today, maybe two hours than my usual time of work and did some tasks then prepared myself and headed to our grandparents' house. Everyone was busy doing the final preparation for the day's event. Those who were there last night relayed what happened. It was saddening to hear but we just laughed it off. We don't want that to tarnish the memory of our grandfather.

The program started around 10:00 a.m. Us grandkids are supposed to sing a closing song to end the service. However, I didn't join for we were busy preparing with the food. Also, I'm afraid I can't hold back and open the flood gates.

After the service, we ate and then rested. Most of us then gathered and headed to the cemetery which was some 1-2 kms away. However, the other half of the way is all uphill such that only those who are strong enough to hike went, mostly the younger ones.

Another short program was held there before finally placing our grandfather's remains in the tomb together with some of his belongings as was the custom. The urn where his ashes are was sealed shut but our grandfather's brother instructed that it should be opened to release the spirit of our grandfather and not be kept shut. They had to use a saw to make an opening and not totally opening the urn.

When the program was done, the rest went back home but we stayed until the finishing touches to the tomb was done before heading back home.

Those who came back from the cemetery should wash their hands in a basin where guava leaves were soaked in warm water as is the custom, washing away the bad luck. Candles should be lit continuously during the vigil to guide the spirit of the departed. Before the candle burns out, you should light another one.

These are just some of the superstitious beliefs that are still practiced today.

At the end of the day, it was tiring but being there for each other, doing what you can to help made the day worth it. Today, I get to be with our relatives that I haven't seen in a long time or just meeting for the first time.

There is still that bond that is within us.

To those who have lost a loved one, a friend, a relative, live in the beautiful memories that you have with them. Find comfort among those left behind. Take time to mourn. Grieve. It's not easy moving on but find strength in the bond that you have.

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2 years ago

Comments

I'm afraid I can't hold back and open the flood gates.

I didn't want to laugh but this statement is so funny that I did 😁😁

Grandfather is gone and had did his best on earth. He has spent a good life and death came for him. The ones alive should continue to live on while the memories of him keeps lingering in your heart.

My condolences and may God grant him a place with Him in heaven. Amen. πŸ™

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2 years ago

I find that funny too. It makes me chuckle remembering.

Thank you so much for the comfort.

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2 years ago

Madi ania no adda kasjy, madama ti "rigat" nga kunada tapos adda agbartek sa agaramid ti drama or what. Pero part samet ti biag ladta ti kasjy... Glad you just laughed it off pero minsan it does make us wonder no apay ngamin nga kasjy. May your grandpa rest in peace kabsat. Watwat met lang ba kasta yo or putahe?

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2 years ago

Salasalamat. Pareho nga watwat ken putahe ta ada gamin dagijay han mabalin ti watwat hehe.

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2 years ago

My deepest condolences to you and your family. In times of this, cooperation with family is the key and holding/hugging literally can give strength. I know the feeling. Actually I learn something new from your article, about the candles.

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2 years ago

Thanks so much!

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2 years ago

Sorry to hear it Lee. When it comes in this situation the family is the most important so don't captured muna and we understand that.

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2 years ago

That's right. It's always the family who should come together.

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2 years ago

Sorry about it dear. My prayers remain. That family drama is absolute memories, the past. Stay strong dear.

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2 years ago

Indeed. From those dramas we become stronger.

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2 years ago

Ouch, my deepest condolences to you article, it's indeed not easy to loose a loved one. I hope you've found strength, πŸ₯Ί may his soul rest in peace.

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2 years ago

Thank you for the comfort.

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2 years ago

My good friend, my condolences, moments like this are really difficult, but always remember in your memory the happy and special moments you have shared with your grandfather, always remember him with joy. Thank you for talking about this, all of us here at read.cash wish you the best and hope you are well.

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2 years ago

Thank you so much for all your words of comfort!

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2 years ago

My dear friend, I offer my condolences on the death of your grandfather. May his soul be at peace. You have a very beautiful ceremony at the funeral of your loved ones. Thanks for writing about them.

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2 years ago

Thanks a lot for those lovely words!

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2 years ago

Accept my condolences. Death is actually inevitable and painful at the same time,when my Grandma almost died one faithful night and came back to life I know how I felt. It's well

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2 years ago

Thank you kindly for your condolences.

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2 years ago

Condolence ulit pre..i'm sure masaya Lolo mo in heaven kasi nakia niyang nagsamasama kayong magkakapamilya..

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2 years ago

Maraming salamat!

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2 years ago

My deepest condolences to your and your family for your loss.

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2 years ago

Thank you!

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2 years ago

May the soul of your beloved granddad continue to rest in the bossom of the lord. Times like this are really difficult but this too shall past

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2 years ago

I do believe in that too that things shall pass for nothing is permanent.

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2 years ago

life is only temporary and nothing can last from this article we must think that our life should do good deeds because that is what will lead us to salvation when we believe God is the way of salvation.

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2 years ago

Amen to that!

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2 years ago

Jan usually nakikita ang pagkakaisa ng isang pamilya... I suddenly missed my grandfather.. I wasn't at home when he died so I really took a leave just to visit his burial and attended the last service..

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2 years ago

Buti nakapag leave ka pa at nakapag attend ng burial.

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2 years ago

Losing someone so special can feel incredibly overwhelming. I know this must be a difficult time for you and your family. We’re keeping you in our thoughts and prayers and I am sending love to you and your family during this trying time.

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2 years ago

That's really wonderful of you. Thank you!

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2 years ago

Nung namatay kaibigsn ko kuya dun ko narealize na dapat pala binigyan ko na nh halaga nung buhay pa sya. may halaha naman pero kase pag kailangan nyako lagi akong wala, nagsisinako sa part naeon. Ngayon bumabawi ako sa pamamagitan ng parents ko pero masyado nila natake for granted kaya diko apam san ako lulugar.

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2 years ago

Hirap talaga pag di natin alam kun san tayo lulugar lalo na pag di tayo maintindihan.

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2 years ago

Tama ka diyan sis, Yung masasalang moment ay dapat ingatan at pangalagaan. Kasi Yung Ang magbibigay says Sayo once na naiisip mo Sila.

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2 years ago

Sir po ako hehe. Tama, positive pa rin tayo dapat :)

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2 years ago

My heartfelt condolences to the bereaved family. When my father died several years ago, I remember how difficult it was to say good-by. The sensation that you do not want to let them go yet must.

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2 years ago

It's never easy losing someone. Thank you for your condolences!

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2 years ago

A last goodbye is very the hardest thing. Sorry to hear this articlee. I hope you were now gathering some strengths to feel good again.

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2 years ago

Thank you!

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2 years ago

May you feel the comfort that you need Lee. We can't avoid those little issues in the family. They resurface especially when everyone is present.

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2 years ago

Some issues should have been voiced out when the dead is yet living especially if it concerns them. Thank you for the comfort.

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2 years ago

Definitely, saying the last goodbye must be the most difficult of all, and although it is part of life, you are never prepared for it, it is inevitable not to feel pain, so my best advice to you is that you allow yourself to feel as much as you can, live the process until you learn to live with it.

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2 years ago

That is an advice that I do too and give for it does help, proven and tested :D Thank you!

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2 years ago

I still don't get the human's nature about why we always value the person and appreciate him when they are dead. You have a very good sentimental for your grandpa bro. Again, I'm sorry for your loss.

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2 years ago

Right? I'm with you on that. The dead knows nothing. Thanks for your sentiments.

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2 years ago

I am touched by your last thoughts. Those who are gone, or advanced because we all go to the same end of life, should be remembered with joy in the beautiful moments shared, they will always be in our hearts, until we meet again in eternity. My greetings from a distance to you in these moments of sadness for the departure of your grandfather

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2 years ago

Thanks so much for your comfort. Much appreciated.

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2 years ago

Condolence Lee,

Sa gabyan talagang pagkakataon eh di nawawala ang gulo, un agaw eksena. Minsan parang may sisihan pa nga as if it matters.

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2 years ago

Salamat!

Sana nag open up sila nung buhay po un tao e wala na e hehe.

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2 years ago

Ganuan naman kasi usually nangyayare, kung kelan patay na eh andming naglalabasn na concern DAW hay..

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2 years ago

Hehe kaya nga.

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2 years ago

Extending my sympathy to you and your family, Lee. Just last week my partner's cousin died because of a motorcycle accident.

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2 years ago

Thank you!

I've read about that. What a tragedy!

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2 years ago

Well, it can be so painful to lose our Loved one to the cold hands of death, all those memories will never be forgotten ,but just like you said, it's inevitable, no matter how long we stay here , there will be a day that everything will end, but we can still live forever after death, it depends on what we do while we are still alive.

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2 years ago

Indeed. Create more wonderful moments that people will remember you by.

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2 years ago