The death of someone even of someone we don't personally know is never news that we want to hear. I know the pain. I know how deepest condolences will not help ease the pain the grieving heart feels. How words of consolation will not be able to console the bereaved. And no time can heal the wound and moving on seems to take a lifetime.
Yesterday while on the road with my husband, his best friend called. He answers the call (hands-free) as the phone is connected to the car. Duncan asks first if he is driving. He sounds different, we can sense there is something wrong.
I told my husband to pull over the car so he can talk to him. We were thinking it's something to do with his Mom.
His Mom
Let me tell you first about this. He is living with his Mom. He does everything like cooking, washing and cleaning. Only washing her Mom he cannot do. He has another sibling Pauline just him and her. Their Dad died a long time ago before my father in law. They were friends too.
Recently, the mother was diagnosed with dementia. He's having a hard time. And it's getting worst. She acts like a child. She doesn't recognize his son and sometimes she thought she's her dad. Sometimes she thought he's a burglar and keep hitting him. She breaking all the biscuits in the house and scattered them everywhere. She gets paper and burns them inside the house.
Every time he goes to the garage to finish some work, neighbours will phone him as his Mom is breaking the windows and banging the door. Sometimes she's okay. Sometimes she recognized her as her son. But the one she never forgot is her daughter Pauline. She keeps looking for her. But Pauline never visit her Mother for 4 years now, even though she just lives not far away from them.
Duncan already phoned the doctor. Phoned because you can't easily see a doctor nowadays. And the thing is there are not many options but to put him in a home that he doesn't want to do. So he decided he will go to see his sister and ask her if she can visit their mother.
The Call
Duncan calls to tell my husband that her sister is dead. Pauline is dead. He went to her house to see if her sister can visit their Mom but what she saw was her house with no life.
She saw from the outside window that her sister was lying on the floor. He calls 999 as he cannot break in into the house. She's dead and nobody knows how long she's been dead. She is living alone. She is single and she's just 57.
That's shocked us. But how much more Duncan felt. Not the news he needs this time when he needs her and their mother needs them the most. Now she is left alone with her Mom.
And how sad it is that her mother will never know and understand that her daughter is dead? Should someone be thankful that at least she will not feel the pain of losing a child and of burying her?
He is waiting for the autopsy. While looking after his Mom he has to make arrangements for the funeral. Our family sends our condolences and that we are with him in this tough time.
Another one
Tonight we received bad news about Alex that he passed away. He is the owner of the field, the one who let us use the field and ride the bike. He doesn't even plough that field so my husband can keep riding his bike in there. He and my husband are the only two left that was born here at Castle Lane. He owns many of the lands all around Comber. He is always nice to our family.
He is a very likable and hardworking man. He works hard every day going to the fields. We just saw him the other day waving at us on his tractor. And we heard the news this morning that he was brought to the hospital and didn't expect tonight's news that he passed away. We are saddened by this.
Now we have two funerals to attend.
Thank you for reading.
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Life is unpredictable. I remember my student during my practicum who was very friendly and kind. He always waves at me every time he sees me. Just 2 weeks ago we met along the road and he said "Hi ma'am" to me with a smile, I smiled back to him and I feel so happy that he still remembers me. And unfortunately, that same day, he died. I can't believe what just happened. It breaks my heart knowing that he was gone so early.