August 06,2021
I plan on not writing today since I'm already at hime and my son might acold me again for using my phone. But here I am in the comfort room, sitting on the closed cubicle, and writing a quick article. I just reasoned out that I need to take p**p. And he's now waiting outside 😌. I can't blame him though for we don't see each other for days and that's why my kid missed me. I always write it here that I am so blessed to have a son like him. Never knew I could bore such a kid.
Demotivated/Depressed
Ever since the start of the week (Monday) I feel so demotivated. I'm up always at work but my mind is empty.I keep 9n saying that I need to be productive each day so that I can satisfy myself that I did well.
I was overpowered by the negative vibes I had in my head. I kept on reading and praising other people honestly but after that it all fades like air.
I cried almost every night this week because I feel like all the problems in the world came to me. And I don't kno if I can handle it, if my heart and mind can handle it.
Finding comfort on a company
I know some of my friends herw might react on this. But I've been wanting to have someone I can talk to about all the burdens I had inside me for days. I simply approached them asking if they're busy or if they had any work that needs to be done. Generally, I want to disturb their own time to listen to me. But I never succeeded on having one😂😂😂. Because whenever I want to say something, I often ask first if they're busy or not and when they say they have some stuffs to do I backed out and just told them to do their stuff first and then forgot that I want a listener of my rants😂😂😂.
my "nak" here, she knows who she is but I will not tag anyone here, came to ask me if I'm alright. I'm not and I want to tell her what's bothering me but I am in the middle of an imoortant meeting at work that time that I had to excuse myself on our conversation. I also told "Pars" that I cried during nights(pasimple lang pagsabi ko nun😂) because I've been feeling so down lately and I praised him after because eventhough his mood is down he can still publish such quality content article.
Saying my rants by posting qoutes in Noice
I often post qoute and say my insights on the said qoute. Mostly sad qoutes. I also share Bible passages and told that I am not in the right state of mund since I've been feeling down lately.
Realization
Then earlier this morning "nak" ask me if I want to share something. But U just realized I don't want to burden anyone anymore. I'm a mature woman,yes I did cry but because I just want to shout my frustrations thats all. So I just told my friend that I will just handle myself and I will put walls so that I can managed to lean on that walls whenever I feel down again.
And since it's Friday I made sure to finish all my work so that I can go home.
Mt sister ask fo a little favor to edit some pictures of my niece for her baptism this coming sunday, but since I'm not good at editing I just made a simple one
So I prepared my stuff so that I can go homw after my task, I get frustrated because my Boss been keeping me at bay eventhough he knows already that I'm going home.
Sometimes my boss do that to me to make me stay and work on the stuffs at work. He's mean sometimes.
So after 2939495969 years I was out at work,hop in the bus, traveled for hours and landed on my city. I had to buy some viand for our dinne4 since they knew already that I'll be coming home tonight so they want treats.So BBQ it is😋
I came home and viola my son looked like he saw his fave paw patrol dogs. But since he they can't go near me I need to take a first and then wash all the dirt away. After I finished taking a bath he also followed and took a bath after me. So we were both fresh 😎😎
And then we cuddle after. He told me all the happenings at home eventhough we already talked about kt whenever we do video calls.. This big of a hug washed away all those sleepless nights.
After our cuddle sessions with my son he went out of play with his cousins and that left me with my neice. Sja's so adorable and cute.
That's all I have to say about my week. And my sons calling me already😣
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Thank you for reading
Keeo safe and God Bless!
Fin!
How are you now mami? And you never got to tell anyone about what's bothering you!