Love it when you hate me
If you don't, I won't be able to walk away on our paradise full of lies. If you keep on loving me, I will be blinded and ignore all the warnings. I will stay and endure it all. I will believe and trust you again.
"Sana pinatay mo nalang ako" (You should have killed me). I showered you with love, true with no pretention. I gave it all because I don't want us to break but all you did was ruin it. Was I never enough? I've been with you through ups and downs. You offered nothing but I stayed. I fought for the love you promise. I kept how hurt I've been to keep you clean.
It hurts to know that the people I trust to support our love, our the people who helped you kept your lies. Your love was fake. I will never forgive you. I hate myself the most for giving us a chance again and again. Now, now that you have someone to replace with me, you're going to leave me as if I have no value. You're going to choose someone you barely know over the person who chose you against all the "nos". Why? I don't even deserve it, so why?
You never loved me. Because if you do, I wouldn't be hurting this bad. It felt heavy and I can no longer smile. I finally exploded and you're telling me not to overreact. I'm not a robot to not feel anything. I hate you but I hate myself the most for giving you a chance to break me. Yes, I love you. I will choose you over anything. "Kulang pa ba ang tunay?" (Is real love not enough?).
PS. This story is not mine
Closing Thoughts
Last night I dreamt about my lola. I found myself in the verge of crying as I missed her so much when I woke up by Moshi's bark. Maybe she wanted to say that she's okay because as clear as the sky, I can see her smile. Covid still restricts me from visiting her grave but I'll hope to pay her a visit soon.
The title is Avril Lavigne's new song. She was and will always be my idol. Her song was on spot to how I felt and so many times her songs saved me. I suggest you listen to her songs and I bet that you will love her as much as I do.
As per my article, not me being a "Marites", but I just happened to overheard a fight between lovers. I'm not eavesdropping, I promise. I just hate the feeling of seeing someone hurting for loving real. I guess we were born in the wrong generation. These days, gadgets are more valueable over loving.
I almost forgot to write an article. Thanks to Zehra for reminding me.
Thank you for reading this article!
If you want to read some more articles of mine, I have monthly summaries here:
December 2021 Articles Summary
November 2021 Articles Summary
September 2021 Articles Summary
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I am not updated with the songs since 2017. 😅 Parang may pagka The World of the Unmarried yung story lalo na yung pati mga friends nagsinungaling.