How do people even get married?

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1 year ago

Howdy folks 🀠 how are you all doing today? How was your Saturday? Today started very sunny and I was complaining about how extreme the sun was but it suddenly rained later in the afternoon, and I'm talking about a very heavy downpour of rain, that's just what I needed and I will always prefer that to a sunny day.

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I read a sad post earlier today that got me wondering; "what do people even talk about before they get married? What characteristics do they look out for in a potential partner?". The post was about a man that killed his wife because of an unexplained 10 million naira (roughly $14, 000) in her possession, he accused her of hiding the money from him and while they were quarreling about it, he hit her on the head with a hard object and she died instantly.

Apparently, someone sent her the money but she didn't tell her husband about it and he found out from someone else (I will come back to this later). He got angry and started questioning her about it, that was how they started a heated argument and she lost her life in the process. One of the neighbors in the house said the couple always have arguments and sometimes the man beats up the wife, it was at this point I started asking the question that birthed this article.

This is not the first time I am hearing about a man beating his wife to the extent of killing her, and I have also heard cases of wives killing their husbands over a little misunderstanding, simply because they can't control their anger. Now my question is; didn't the other person see this bad character in their partner before getting married to them? Or was it an arranged marriage?

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I have heard people say that some people pretend during courtship and only show their true character when they are already married but I believe that no matter how a person pretends, they will certainly be instances where you can catch a glimpse of their true self but most people will choose to ignore it and attribute it to maybe stress or mood swings.

Some of those people choose to be blinded by their love for the person to the extent that they choose to ignore the little red flags before getting married, they try to justify it by saying "nobody is perfect" or "we all have flaws". If a man is already slapping you out of anger before you are even married to him, doesn't that already spell doom for you? But instead, some people come up with excuses and they end up regretting it later on.

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Back to the story

I made mention that the husband only found out about the money from someone else, what did the person aim to achieve by telling the husband about some money that doesn't concern them? Some people thrive on spreading gossip, they love creating chaos and pulling down families, why meddle in the affairs of a couple?

The truth is, anybody will get angry to hear something about their partner from someone else when they should have heard it first from their partner, and for the wife to keep such thing from her husband shows that the couple has been having problems, in addition to the fact that their neighbor also said they are always quarreling.

It's just too bad she lost her life over such a small issue, coz it turned out that the money was sent to her by a relative who lives abroad and wants her to use the money to build a project. The couple should have talked about it maturely and it shouldn't have taken them more than 30 minutes but instead, they resorted to fighting, now one is dead while the other will spend the rest of his life in prison.

Thanks for reading πŸ’–πŸ’–πŸ’–

Saturday October 15, 2022

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1 year ago

Comments

I agree with you, that eventhough during courtship you cannot tell that easily the true attitude of one person, but definitely you will see some red flags this is what I am trying to say when I make the article love yourself and things to remember when choosing a partner

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1 year ago

Love, understanding leads to marriage But marriage can sometimes be the most difficult school, because humans change as the clock ticks, people character changes and brings out new growth of attitude

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1 year ago

We should just pray that we end up with someone who won't turn out to be a monster after marriage

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1 year ago

Marriage is very sweet. I pray we all get married to the right partner. Also, whenever we notice some red lights in marriage, we should leave. I'm sure the man must have been doing something similar to this but the wife chose to manage

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1 year ago

Yes na, the neighbor said the man has been beating the wife but she still remained in the marriage, and now she has lost her life

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1 year ago

What a way for a marriage to break apart. I can understand that anger can make us become something else but everything should be controlled and not allowed to lead to destruction first.

Imagine killing his wife now for money that had nothing to do with the both of them.

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1 year ago

See what his anger has caused him, money that isn't even his own and now he will spend the rest of his life in prison

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1 year ago

Some people indeed pretend to be nice during the romantic period of the relationship. We only know the person's true colors once you started living under the same roof together. And money is one of the issues some marriages fall off when it shouldn't be like that.. those people lost their sense of humanity once they enslave their selves for money.

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1 year ago

You're totally right, money has a way of changing a person and bring out the worst in a lot of people. It's scary to think that a person can just suddenly change when you get married to them and become your worst nightmare

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1 year ago

I think I read this story on naira land. Very sad indeed. Sometimes tho, people don't pretend during courtship, they just change. People change, always remember that. About this story, I feel like there's a bsckstory to it that we don't know about, nevertheless there's no justification for abuse, let alone murder.

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1 year ago

I also feel there's something more to the story that we don't know about, I have a lot of questions about the whole thing but I will just keep them to myself. You're right about people changing overtime, sometimes it isn't exactly a case of pretence during courtship but something might just change in the person when they eventually get married, and that's actually scary

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1 year ago

It is oo. Shit happens.

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1 year ago

OMG, for just a money she lost her life? That is why communication is the key always,,

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1 year ago

Communication and trust are very important in a relationship. I wonder what went through the husband's head when he found out about the money

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1 year ago

When it comes to money, many turns to evil😬

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1 year ago

Killin a wife because she hides money from you? It's not as if she stole the money fa. He should have at least allowed her to explain first before jumping into conclusions and taking drastic actions. Nawa o for some people o... Abi na the situation of they country dey make people dey vex anyhow

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1 year ago

The whole thing just tire me. There's definitely a lot of underlying issues between them and I guess the hidden money situation was the last straw

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1 year ago

Common issues in married life were money and lies in both parties. they have a hidden agenda on how to get rid of each other when their got already what they want.some are just getting married to get wealth from their partners.

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1 year ago

That's the reality of the world we live in today, people getting married for selfish reasons and it's no wonder that a lot of marriages don't last long these days

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1 year ago

That’s sad. Communication, respect and loyalty are vital to keep the love alive. May she rest in peace.

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1 year ago

Exactly, we shouldn't underestimate the power of communication in a relationship

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1 year ago

Lord have mercy 🀦... May I never miss it in marriage πŸ‘° πŸ™ This is very serious. So many people have lost their lives all in the name of marrying their sweetheart turned bitterheart.

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1 year ago

It's funny how someone's "love of my life" can turn into their nightmare overnight, marriage is getting more scary these days

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1 year ago

Sad to hear about that news, should have the wife tell the husband there might be space to talk about it and set up the boundary that the money is for a project and a partner capital. The neighbor might told it in proper way that it will council and console not just the husband but the wife, "the newscaster" might just say "Maybe your wife receive money for business venture or she will tell you when it's time"...

If the gossipper don't give her such judgement, the other side may stirred up in anger or uncontrol emotions.

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1 year ago

The whole issue could have been avoided if they talked to each other in a respectful manner. The wife could have told her husband about the money at first and avoided the whole argument from starting in the first place, it's just sad that it end this way

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1 year ago

A good communication is a key to prevent any misunderstanding

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1 year ago