I tell myself that 23 is still very very young and life kinda have its natural flows and so I attract what I am, where I am and what I would become and so what I really mean by that is when you are ready, your minds starts to really look and it sees things that it otherwise did not see when you weren't ready. First instance you are in a season and then you work really hard to and you're trying to reach your goal that is for to become a great writer in the next three years, really that's a huge task that you have going on.
The mind cannot focus fully on finding relationship, likewise other things and also doing your work, so you and I priorities now is our work. That's where my attention and energy is going, and that's what you look like. What if I looked like I was into something and I don't have all the time in the world to be distracted, because my focus is on the grace and not that I can't have much fun if I wish to but it's just an unending ride..
Its not like you'd spend the whole time in the world getting facials and hair do or whatever it might be. I've got to stop listening to what other people want for my life and if that is my desire I have to first look at the roots.. the pressure I face daily, where is it coming from? Have I made efforts towards achieving my goals within the required time? Sometimes I feel that I'm going to miss out on the things of life because of fear..
I've got to look at myself, and be okay and comfortable with everything I do. We all have diverse preferences and good standards ... its back down to preference, do I set unrealistic goals and because someone else does the same thing I want to do that too. Life can be really complicated at any age, but if I want to break through worry and thinking I have to put in place some factors. If my goals are too risky that it makes me bothered everyday then its not a healthy one. If my goals are too ambiguous and complicated then it's not healthy too..
At my present age, so many thing could go either the right way or the wrong way, this is the ideal time when so many income related thoughts and how to settling Bills becomes too deep. If I'm not careful, it can lead to some serious mental issues very soon. It's also the age when everyone expects us to be vibrant all the time and make good use of every opportunity, we will find a way to pull that through but at the cost of hurting..
Let me not lie to you, I check my blood pressure daily because some part of me is feeling the strength and daily struggle.. It doesn't really help much as I'm going back to my shell planning another route to achieving my goal. I think I digressed a little bit but back to the picture, take good care of yourself always. There is time and season for everything, do not reach the end and end up dying out of frustration...
A little story as I wrap up, so a friend of my sister.. the same set but different course had a serious issue that she kept to herself and never told anyone even her parent. She endured all through her university days until she couldn't hold it much longer... her heart rate was easily triggered anytime she worries over anything. After her 4th year in school before the convocation ceremony she slumped and died instantly. It was a very painful happening that day which could have been stopped if she where on drugs and was tutored the true consequences of worrying and anxiety...
As I was composing this, my sister told me the full story and my mind was made up to take things easy... it may take more than the expected time frame, but with dedication we will meet up..
Thank you for reading...
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October 2021
I thought you're older than me King but now I know that I am a year older than you hihi.
And yes, let's take things easy. Pressuring ourselves to do something might affect our mental health. I am experiencing things like that this month and the struggle is real. I worried about every single thought that came inside my head and it's eating me.