To Live In Or Leave Your Parent's House?

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Avatar for Jane
Written by
2 years ago

October 18, 2022

While homebodies are comfortable enough to live in their own abodes and can't seem to leave them, others aim to step out of their houses literally to live on their own for many reasons. Freedom, privacy, and an independent life are a few reasons I can name. This topic came to mind after reading @Kushyzee's article about When should a person leave their parents' house?

In my own point of view, a person can leave their parent's house once they have already established a stable life with a job that can sustain their daily needs. Any kind of job, as long as it won't make the person starve for the rest of their life, and definitely not make the person live in the street. This is not ideal for students who seem to struggle to make ends meet and those who rely only on their parent's shoulders.

Some may believe that living on their own is a relatively easy life, particularly for the young ones. They compared living on their own to living in boarding houses while waiting for their parents' allowances. It is indeed a lovely life - no need to be concerned about finances.

But hell no, the other way is totally different. And you can only understand the real-life struggle if you literally live on your own, working to finance your expenses, rent, and bills while also doing housework, laundry, marketing, cooking, and so on. (While writing this part, I realized that it is no different with working and living with my parents, but still doing all of those, lol)

It's funny to think back to when we were students; we wanted a job right away so we could buy and do whatever we wanted and live independently. But once we get a job and experience all kinds of shits in life (as per PVM), we just want to go back to being worry-free students and wait for our parents' allowances to arrive. Have you ever thought about that? I did many times. Adulthood with a lot of responsibilities sucks.

As mentioned above, there are reasons why others want to leave their parent's house. And if I were to put myself in this situation (which I truly wish to do), my reasons will be: to achieve freedom and independent life, escape from burdens and responsibilities, and more peaceful life.

Independent life and a little freedom are what I have right now. But the second reason is still tied up with me, and would probably stay for I don't exactly know until when, until my 40s? The 50s? That sucks. And a more peaceful life is what I truly desire, especially given that I grew up in a large family where the noise seemed to be permanently contained within our home. I want to live alone so that I can have more freedom. Somewhere where no one will interfere with my relaxation and where I can do whatever I want without others bothering me. In my own house, I can even go naked or insane if I want to. A more private and free life where I could feel pretty at ease in my own skin.

Yet, there are reasons too why others couldn't seem to leave their parent's house. Some reasons that I can name include: being homebodies and the fear of separation or stepping out of their comfort zone, the unstable source of income, the inability to manage his/her own life (those reliant), and lastly, family responsibilities.

I know a lot of homebodies here and they are afraid to step out of their comfort zone to the beehive. It's pretty risky to think though at the beginning, but surely, the time will come when you will definitely want your own space to live independently. Mark these words!

But see? Family responsibilities seem to be included in all circumstances. And again, if I will put myself in this situation, even if I want to leave my parent's house, I still couldn't unload those responsibilities, until such time that my youngest sibling is fully grown up, and already know how to stand on his own.

So to live in, or leave my parent's house?

If I were to choose, of course, to leave, but, at right time when things are already at the right place. Yet, I wouldn't leave for good, and I will always come back when necessary. Besides, there's no place like home.

What about you? Share your answer below.


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Avatar for Jane
Written by
2 years ago

Comments

Yes, nobody left their parents for good coz we always come home lalo na tayong mga Pinoy... When I was a student I wanted to leave our house to be free and independent din. I thought of looking for a job and not rely on them pero my strict and proud parents said it's nkakahiya as if daw d nila kmi kayang pag-aralin.

For now am self reliant mom of 4 kids, and is living sa bahay ng mga parents q. They are living at their house in town

$ 0.00
2 years ago

My culture is definitely much different from yours. It's not common for us to live with our parents once we graduate high school or the very least past being a college graduate.

I had the easier way out I enlisted in the military so it kind of had the feeling of moving to another home but this time the government acted as the parents at first. Once I got settled at my first base and was allowed my own choice of shelter I went in with a fellow brother of arms into an apartment. It wasn't until about 5 Years later I finally lived by myself in an apartment. Than another 5 years later my own house.

I guess you can say I took baby steps to getting fully out of the house. I don't regret it and am generally happy with where I'm at today. I think you just have to be sure your ready and prepared to leave home. Your right there is no place like home. Once you leave and get oldier where your living eventually becomes home again :)

$ 0.00
2 years ago

For now I'm living with my parents but sooner I will live in my own.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Well, on my part, I am more comfortable living separately from my parents. It's more practical and by standing on your own, you can really discover the feeling of being independent, you will know what's lacking and needed to be accomplished without relying on your on them but you alone and your husband specially in making decisions.

However, honestly if only we are having good relationship with my parents, I might consider living with them.(just saying.).There's more to say but I will just end here😅

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Oi you are back. Since you have your own fam na, you can't live with them anymore hehe

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I want to just live with my mom, maybe if I have my own fam that's the time I'll move out or maybe not haha it's because I don't want my mom to live alone. Siguro kung buhay pa si papa okay lang mag move out soon as magka work but it's a different case now hehe

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Ilan kyo magkakapatid?

$ 0.00
2 years ago

5 po ako bunso

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Ah. kya pla

$ 0.00
2 years ago

They compared living on their own to living in boarding houses

🤣 This is very funny because I have actually seen people in my university thinking this way. Just because they are staying on their own in apartments (paid for by their parents!), they assume that living independently is easy but they will eventually get a reality shock when they actually stand on their own and realize they have to pay bills and have a steady stream of income.

The most scary part about living independently is not having a stable job or losing your only source of income. Imagine someone who's on a salary-job suddenly getting fired and not finding a replacement job soon, that's a very scary situation

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Exactly. . something that young people must be aware of.. Having stable job is the most important part

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I want to live with my own na talaga pinag aasawa na nga ako actually, ako lang muna ayaw umalis kasi gusto kong maiwan parents ko na nasa good condition para panatag akong aalis sa tamang panahon ;D

$ 0.01
2 years ago

How old are you na ba? Mag asawa kna kc, haha

$ 0.00
2 years ago

25 Madam, hahaha ewan ko ba wala pa nadating e

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Leaving the house of our parents is a necessity and for me I feel that any adult should be able to leave when they want to and are ready to face the world.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Nung bata ako gusto ko tumanda agad, now that I am an adult gusto ko naman bumalik sa pagkabata para matakasan mga responsibilities hahaha charizz. Ayun. tuloy pa rin ang buhay. :)

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Hehe. Same especially kung too exhausted na sa lahat2

$ 0.00
2 years ago

At times, we wish to go back to being a student where we can receive weekly and monthly allowances. But it's just a wish. If there were a time machine, I wouldn't go back to being a student. Life is satisfying when you spend what you earn.

I would want to leave but when my parents are growing old and they have no other company, I would stay and cherish my time with them.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

That will be my case din kung wala makasama sa pagtanda nla. Nauunahan na nga ako mag asawa mga nkakabata kong kapatid 🤣

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Adulting sucks, if most of us knows this beforehand, maybe we all won't like to grow up 🤣

But that's the cycle of life.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Haha...kaya nga 🤣

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I agree with your point. I don't think age should be a determinant of when a child will leave his parent's house. If one is financially stable and he or she feels like he is capable of taking care of himself without seeking help from his parents or other people then he can live alone

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Of course,.. As long as they are responsible enough to handle their lives

$ 0.00
2 years ago

True miss Jane. Maintindihan mo lang talaga pag ma experience mo kapag when we live with our own na. Iba din kasi yung nag boarding house or apartment na nag wait lang for allowances from their parents.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Ibang iba lol

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I love leaving with my parents lol because it's convenient but it comes with responsibilities. Now if you can live on your own, why not? The thing is you are free to do anything and everything you want in your own space.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

We can live on our own naman, pero kung may responsibilities parn, parang same lang haha

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Whenever you want to leave your parent's house, make sure you don't rebel and leave there because in case something goes wrong, you'll be able to ask for their help

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Exactly

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I agree with your opinion that it is when you are sure of living a stable life and owning a good job is when you can decide to live on your own.

For someone like me, one of my reasons is to be independent and take responsibility on my own without depending on others.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

I guess you can do it already since you are done studying.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

This has very much to do with the kind of society we live in though. In Europe and America, you're made to feel like once you're eighteen to 21, you're a loser it you still live with your parents. In Africa and Asia however this isn't the case.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

I guess because they have assistance there. Unlike in our country.. You need to grind more if you want to live on your own.. All expenses are yours

$ 0.00
2 years ago

As I recently commented to our friend on this subject, it is not easy to be pressured by society for this matter and not have anywhere to go, even as hard as you work you do not have how to rent an apartment. Inflation is so high that many here can't afford it.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

True.. Rents are higher now compared before..

$ 0.00
2 years ago