Good intention becomes dejected sometimes. We think we help but ended up with another problem and a more messy situation. Sometimes we had to let them do the thing, watch and figure out the answer on their own, for we had the problem that only ourselves could answer so also for them.
I am not really a man who fans of using or asking for help, not because I know how to handle the thing on my own but maybe there is another thing more than needed before asking anyone for assisting hands. Because sometimes help from others will cause more damage than the original glass of the broken one. Thats growth.
Other people have also had this kind of mindset, those introverts or people who want to stay alone are sometimes overheard for being selfish or perfectionist. I comprehend someone who is shy for attention, so she just working on her own. She's smart but really afraid to show in another face the talent she had.
Do you know someone or are you introverted? Be careful about helping or offering help to them, because what you think is weak or fragile but I see differently. Introverts are people with a strong personality, they could cope up to something on their own without any help from anyone. they could make a wise decision even just by listening to themselves.
Another nice attribute of introverts are they waiting if you ask them for help. they don't present their selves even they know the answer, they not ignoring you but waiting for you to ask, that's what the introvert girl tells me.
Silent bomb, that is what I call her as she is an introvert. I met her during my college, she graduated cum laude in our university and board passer like me, maybe the thing that makes us friend even now, she's far away is that I showed her that I understand for being herself and shown the right help for not interrupting or add problem in her side.
I called her bomb for I had seen how she explode when someone tried to act they care but ended more mess in the project we had. I actually sees silent people as stronger than others for they don't tell or show the weakness they had. This is how began.
Pake and Pake-alamera
For people who don't understand Filipino-Tagalog, let me introduce to you some negative words, please analyzed them carefully to avoid conflict with some other Filipino you will encounter. I don't tolerate this kind but maybe you should know how the words use and know people who are under this.
"Pake" stands for care. When they say "May Pake" its means he/she cares about you, "Walang pake" means he/she won't have any care about the action you have shown. "Pake-alamera" stands for people who acting they belong or knew but deep inside wasn't. He/she doesn't know the real happening yet they choose to give what is not really needed.
I see the difference between "Pake" and "Pakia-alamero". Sometimes people who care or have the pake into you will listen first before the act or told you something, those who didn't genuinely care will always tell you what they think not realizing the effect in you.
It's like you need help in cooking but they benefit you during eating. That's the effect of fake people wanted to help, but secretly hiding their hunger inside to grab you down or worst wait for your distraction to finish the meal serves on their own.
Avoid people who always wanted to help without knowing what to give or guidance. Not to attract or brag at anyone, but this person will just have the motives. If you really want to help the people indeed, you must know first what help you could give. Maybe being silent may be a great help to that people.
Yeah, for me I see people who will act silently rather than making more noise. For we had our own mind to think for a solution if people around us are silently helping.
Those who don't ask for help.
If you are not a Doctor you must not prescribe any medicine, that's so simple. We sometimes want to act and perform kindness to anyone, and if we could do we should offer our help to everyone, I don't see any bad or intentionally negative because I also do that before not realizing and questioning if they need our help?
Because sometimes people are looking for help and maybe you are not the person capable of doing the help for them, especially emotionally conduct. I'm not really a man that you could talk to when it comes to drama, I will listen yet I will act nothing or judge nor telling you what you did is correct and upright.
This topic was pending for me for a month now, just this time I got the courage to tell this for I have seen a real picture. I sighted this topic as a great reflection of what we did in others or what others did to us.
The next time we see people whos needing for help, maybe we should ask first if they need the aid or we should wait until the time they are ready to ask for help.
How about you? Do you want others to help you always? why or why not?
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Is being not able to say that you are sick to the friends marked as an introvert? I've been sick this late month, let's say almost a month, and my friend always asking if something happens to me, and I always say nothing, my mindset is if ever I say what happens to me they cannot help me, they are here to be with me but cannot help me for real.