The law of wasted effort.
**THE LAW OF WASTED EFFORT**
I have actually thought about this particular topic for many times in my moment of sober reflections, I have looked so worried because of the challenges that come so close to man every moment he tries to make a difference or find a positive result but fails to achieve that.
This feeling of pain comes when we have put all our hopes, dreams and expectations towards achieving success and along the line all our efforts turns out to be unfruitful. At that moment of our failure, we begin to regret, hate ourselves and feel abandoned and rejected. We feel as if the entire world has collapsed on top of us and we wish for the ground to open so we can be swallowed and disappear.
Sometimes after the dashed hopes and dreams, we find ourselves in that surroundings of not trying again, we give up easily and accept defeat as our consolations rather than picking up ourselves and trying again.
When all these things are happening to you, have you for one second ask yourself this important question that I am going to ask right now;
***Why am I giving up so easily?***
If you can be able to ask yourself this question when the chips are down, when you feel the world has left you and when you feel you have failed completely, then know it that you have actually made a positive step to giving yourself a second chance to succeed and win.
Let me give you an important information that will surely help you to stand even it seems over in your life. Make sure you understand this and know where you can help yourself to succeed again. Do you really know that most lions only succeed in a quarter of their hunting attempts, which means they fail in 75% of their attempts and succeed in only 25% of them?
***Despite this small percentage shared by most predators, they don't despair in their pursuit and hunting attempts.***
***The main reason for this is not because of hunger as some might think but it is the understanding of the “Law of Wasted Efforts” that has been instinctively built into animals, a law in which nature is governed.***
***Half of the eggs of fish are eaten, half of the baby bears die before puberty, most of the world's rains fall in oceans and most of the seeds of trees are eaten by birds.***
***Scientists have found that animals, trees, and other forces of nature are more receptive to the law of "wasted efforts".***
***Only humans think that the lack of success in a few attempts is a failure, but the truth is that: we only fail when we "stop trying".***
Success is not to have a life free of pitfalls and falls, but success is to walk over your mistakes and go beyond every stage where your efforts were wasted looking forward to the next stage.
If there is a word that summarizes this world, it will simply be: "***continue all over again".*** Never stop at any stage of difficulty. Keep moving, keep thinking, keep by trying. And above all, keep praying.
If you’re having difficulties with anything your hand finds to do out there, try and reach out to people around you and who knows who will be of good help to you. Don't shy away and keep dwelling in your failure and self pity for falling.
I really want to thank everyone for their active participation in this platform called read.cash, I must confess that you guys are trying immensely, most especially those that are consistent in dropping their article and short notes every second of the day since the inception of this platform. http://read.cash
I must confess that it's not easy writing every day and being consistent with it. I encourage you never to give up even if what you are expecting to get didn't come the way you wanted, keep doing what you know how to do best ok.
***Have a great day and always remember that rafd******9828*** ***really love you guys. Thanks for reading my article today.***
2022 FIFA world cup: A game with lots of surprising outcome.
I know you have been watching this classic, fantastic and interesting display of football talents, dribbling skills, amazing performances, actions and unimaginable outcome of final time scores results by different countries at the field of play in Qatar 2022 FIFA world cup competition.
The football games played so far have been so fascinating and wonderful with the current score lines we have been seeing dropping at the different stadiums where these gladiators are competing with each other to win this year's FIFA world cup competition trophy.
As the games are unfolding, there are lots of surprises, unimaginable results and actions we have actually been witnessing so far in this game, lots of winnings, draws and even losses.
Even some strong countries that came for these tournament highly fortified with a good number of international professional club side players performing absolutely well at their different club sides been flogged to defeat by countries that have less professional players in their national teams that came for this FIFA tournament. You can see frustrations, disappointments and sadness on the faces of these players and fans of these countries that came to this FIFA tournament with so much professionals with high expectations but were disgraced and beaten by their counterparts they underrated and took for granted.
Looking at what happened between ***La Selección (National Team) of Argentina*** and ***Al-Suqour Al-Khodhur (The Green Falcons) of Saudi Arabian*** counterparts at the ongoing FIFA tournament where both the players, fans and the entire citizen of Argentina were humiliated from behind as a result of the defeat they received from the Al-Suqour Al-Khodhur (The Green Falcons) of Saudi Arabia at their first match meeting at Qatar. It was a moment of surprise and disappointment for the La Selección (National Team) of Argentina while a moment of happiness, jubilation and celebration for the Al-Suqour Al-Khodhur (The Green Falcons) of Saudi Arabia and the entire people of Saudi Arabia where their government declared national holiday on the Jeddah Corniche by the Red Sea, in the heart of the capital Riyadh and in towns and villages across the country, the public holiday was for all state employees “and the private sector, and male and female students in all educational stages”, the government announced on tuesday evening 22nd November, 2022.
As the shock and surprise of the defeat were still in the hearts of the entire world over Argentina loss to Saudi Arabia, The **Germany national football team** **(German: Deutsche Fußballnationalmannschaft)** received a shocking defeat from the **Samurai Blues of the Japan national football team** by a 1-2 win against them. The outcome of this result devastated the entire people of Germany and the fans who came to watch the match, as they believed that German national football team would win outrightly but instead they were disappointed.
Many other surprising score lines from different match tournaments played so far by different national football teams have proven to the whole world that football can not be predicted and ascertained by any person that a particular team is better and can win the other team with ease if asked to predict on the remaining matches to be played at FIFA tournament in Qatar.
With the type of final score results sheets and the type of football display we have seen so far in this FIFA tournament at Qatar, it's so obvious that we will be expecting lots of surprises and intriguing results from the tournament. No one can say what happens next as every country that came for this trophy is so determined to surprise the world with the country each of them is going to meet at the field of play. None can be underestimated and underrated as long as this tournament is concerned.
**MY LESSON**
With what has happened within these few days of play, I have learnt a strong lesson which I want everyone reading this article to take note of, in life what ever you are doing, who ever you are dealing with, do not see that particular thing or see that person as something or someone you can always subdue, very inferior and very weak, rather make sure you don't take chances, lose focus or lose guard yourself and feel you have gotten it all.
As you are important in the field of play, so is your opponent playing with you, so therefore do all you can to put your best at work in making sure you win. Play and do all you can as if it's your last game on earth and your life depends on it to survive.
I saw the efforts and strengths these countries that won these strong national teams displayed during their meetings, this is exactly how someone who really want to win his or her battle should always fight. I bet you when you fight and win, surely the reward is overwhelming and fulfilling as your heart is fully satisfied and your joy complete.
More surprises, more unimaginable score lines and unpleasant results will come as the matches in this tournament unfolds. This is football and it's unpredictable.
***Have a pleasant moment as you watch this*** ***2022*** ***FIFA world cup competition happening live at Qatar... Rafd******9828******.***
Time is your friend.
I always hear people say this especially when the time is getting late and they are not meeting up with what they have scheduled for the day; ***"Time is not on our side"***. Also I hear some say ***"time is against us"*** and ***"there is no time".***
All of these statements are usually used by different people when they feel they are running late from achieving their plans and goals.
*Now my question is;*
**Who should be blamed, is it the "Time" or the "Human being"?.**
It's a question we must find the right answer to it, and sincerely tell ourselves the truth.
Now whether we like it or not the fact still remain that time in the actual sense stand as our friend that always walk with us in everything that we do in life, it's something that always remind us if we are getting it right or not. It's a gift to man for a second chance.
Time is a special gift to mankind if only we can accept the truth about it's existence on earth. I believe that time is given to mankind as a reminder that you have a lot of responsibilities facing you which you need it's assistance to achieve. In otherwords, time is created and given to mankind to assist them plan their activities right in time and to achieve it successfully.
You know that time is divided into two, **"DAY"** and **"NIGHT"** and these special periods assist every human to arrange and plan what ever goal they want to achieve in life. When you fail to make that special gift your friend and allow it to guide you in your daily life activities, surely you will end up to see it as your enemy rather than a friend.
Time is of the essence in the life of a every human being created by God. You can not understand the importance of time to man if you don't take it's presence serious in your daily living.
Starting from the origin of the creation of the universe and man, God made time his friend by using it well to create all his creations and after that, he looked at everything he made and saw that it was good and on the seventh day God rested. If God didn't understand the importance of time, he would not have first created time which he called day and night.
coming down to mankind, after God used time to create the world, he gave man the opportunity to also make use of it, and that is the reason why we can also sleep at night and wake up in the morning. Man's ability to have strong and healthy living comes with the help of time which enabled man to work in the day and have his rest at night. If you want to go against this special gift called time, you may work all day and all night without having to rest your body, by tomorrow you will not like the body condition you will find yourself due to your inability to use your time well.
When a man refuses to make use of the time before him to plan all his life, definitely you are welcoming downfall, failure and regret at the end of the day. Whether you feel it's not important to recognise time in your daily routine, whether you feel it's not important to work with time and make use of it judiciously or not, the most important certainty of life is that at the end of it all, time will surely not disappear on the planet earth, rather we the humans will.
That's why you always hear people that knows the importance of time and it's value to mankind say, **"Times waits for no man"**. If you understand what that means, you will agree with me that time is your friend who does not wait for you to keep crying at your loss, rather is a friend that always give you a second chance to make corrections and try again.
Time is a friend that surely bring you that expected result you have longed and waited for, if only you will wait and work according to the plans you have set for yourself and be patient with it.
Time is the best friend you can ever have, the only problem we have as humans is, we do not see time as an important gift God gave to mankind. For instance, instead of you to work hard, use your time well and wait with the tune of time for your expectations to materialize, you go about wasting your time on things that are not important to you and things that can not get you to where you are rightly heading to, at the end of it all, you start to blame time for not being available for you any longer, you start to say that there is no more time again and stuff like that. You begin to hold time responsible for your failure and misfortunes.
You see my friend, I want you to always have this at the back of your mind, time is not your enemy, time is not your problem, the problem you have is yourself. If you want to achieve any set goal in life, make time your friend and wait for the reward to come at the appropriate time.
Make time your friend and you will never regret you did.
***Have a pleasant day... Rafd******9828***
Denial; Could it be a defense technique?
*Hello everyone, I believe we all are doing great and making sure the world is safe through our individual contributions and efforts through our ideas written down in form of articles on read.cash. More grace to everyone here.*
****DENIAL: A SELF-DEFENSE TECHNIQUE****
Denial can be said to be a form of self-defense. When you are in denial, you are attempting to shield yourself from a truth that is too painful for you to embrace. Short-term denial is sometimes necessary. It can provide you with the opportunity to organize yourself and embrace a substantial change in your life. However, denial can have a negative impact and become unhealthy.
****THE MAIN CAUSES OF DENIAL****
Denial occurs when a person fails to recognise or express their emotions, particularly when those emotions are uncomfortable. People frequently fear that expressing their feelings will jeopardize their emotional security or that they will lose control of their lives. However, the opposite occurs, and their buried feelings might gradually take over their existence.
*Being in denial might manifest as:*
**WITHDRAWAL**
Withdrawal occurs when a person does not desire to be around others or participate in activities. For example, they may complain that being near others is too stressful. Perhaps they believe that others dislike them or do not want them to be a part of a certain social circle. While it may make you feel better in certain respects, it can also cause loneliness, rage, misunderstanding, and misguided thinking.
**BULLYING**
This is when you use threats, coercion, or ridicule to gain control over someone else. The individual who does this is attempting to make others feel as horrible as they do in order to feel less lonely. When you are in denial, you reject that you are unhappy. Therefore this method will have an unintended and unfavorable impact on you.
**SELF-HARM**
Unfortunately, denying that you are going through painful feelings will not make them go away. The intensity and pain of whatever you're dealing with will always return. People in denial frequently express this through cutting, eating problems, or engaging in risky or dangerous behaviors. These habits appear to provide comfort from the intensity of your emotions, but they instead take you down a darker and more painful path.
**USE OF DRUGS**
Similarly, if you are in denial, you may abuse substances. Many people who are addicted to drugs or alcohol use denial to maintain their addiction, which can have a negative impact on their relationships. This can lead to your loved ones frantically attempting to persuade you of the reality of your addiction, which may just push you further away from them.
These are just a few examples of how denial may damage your life. It might effect you differently depending on who you are, your situation, and what you are in denial about.
Denial can also be beneficial at times. When a terrible or significant life event occurs, it can be difficult to accept what has occurred. You may require some mental space to unconsciously process what has occurred so that you do not emotionally spiral out.
This is especially true when making decisions and planning for an event. This form of denial might be beneficial as long as you begin to accept what happened as soon as possible.
**HOW TO OVERCOME DENIAL**
Of course, when anything big or terrible occurs in your life, you will most certainly wish it didn't. In these instances, it might be difficult not to fall into denial. However, if you see yourself in denial or if someone you trust brings it out to you, there are techniques to overcome it, such as techniques are as follows;
***1. Consider what you would be scared to see in it's whole.***
***2. Consider what can happen if you continue to live in denial, both positively and negatively.***
***3. Allow yourself time to process your emotions and anxieties.***
***4. Investigate whether or if you have any unreasonable assumptions about your denial.***
***5. Make a list of your thoughts and feelings.***
***6. Discuss it with someone you trust or a loved one.***
***7. Participate in a support group.***
***8. Seek the help of a therapist or counselor.***
Denial is a difficult thing to get through, and you will frequently want the assistance of your loved ones. You may need to seek the assistance of a mental health professional to understand and get through your denial.
***Thanks for coming by to read and make your comment on my post. Have a great day. Rafd9828.***
Fear: A feeling that saves and also destroys.
The word **"******FEAR******"** is a very broad topic if we are to examine and discuss it in full, but I would want to pick out a particular aspect of fear to discuss with you guys. Well, I will be discussing little about fear and what we have been able to experienced from our different worlds as a result of fear.
Fear can be beneficial and also non-beneficial to us humans. It is hardwired into our neural system and provides us with the survival instincts we require to keep ourselves safe from harm.
Fear is bad when it causes us to be more cautious than we need to be to keep safe and inhibits us from doing things we might otherwise enjoy.
A ***phobia*** is an irrational fear of a certain object or event. When someone with a phobia is exposed to this thing or scenario - or even just thinks about it - they can experience tremendous anxiety.
Fear is a natural human feeling that everyone goes through at some point in their lives. What counts most is how we deal with our worries and if we allow them to rule our lives.
We may not refer to our different sensations as "fear." We can name it stress, worry, or panic, yet we are generally referring to the same emotion when we use these terms.
When we feel fear, we can experience three types of symptoms: ***Unhelpful thoughts***, such as thinking everyone in the room with us is having critical thoughts about us, or that something bad will happen. ***Physical symptoms***, such as a rapid heartbeat, faster breathing, sweating and higher blood pressure (our bodies’s ‘fight or flight’ response). ***Changes in our behaviours***, ranging from simple things such as avoiding a fun activity, to more serious issues like being afraid to leave our homes. The good news is there are lots of ways to help manage our fears. And lots of places to find help. One of which is talking to our doctors if we have severe or frequent anxiety attacks, or if they interfere with our daily lives.
*What is the distinction between good and pathological fears?*
**GOOD FEAR**
This type of fear is hardwired into our neural systems and operates naturally from birth. It provides us with the survival instincts we need to keep ourselves safe when we are in danger, also Some worries are beneficial. For instance if we see a venomous snake in our backyard and our panic causes us to run back into our houses and shut the door, we have a healthy fear. Fear is a natural emotion that serves to keep us safe. This instance given is one of the good fears that is so helpful to man.
**PATHOLOGICAL FEAR**
Other anxieties, on the other hand, are unhealthy and needless. Fear can cause us to be more cautious than we need to be. Meeting new people may be scary, but it poses no genuine danger to our safety. This dread is harmful since it prevents us from doing things we would otherwise like.
**There are various approaches we can use to combat our worries.**
1. Frequent exercise, can help us reduce your stress levels.
2. Eating good meals, getting adequate sleep, and minimizing or eliminating stimulants like caffeine and alcohol can all help.
3. Problem-solving exposure treatment (learning to fight our fears of something by understanding it and gradually being exposed to it, in a safe environment).
4. Cognitive reorganization (learning to recognise our negative thoughts, dispute them, and think of more helpful ways to respond to a situation).
5. Mindfulness (focused on the present now – noticing and embracing our thoughts, feelings, and the physical sensations of our body, without classifying them as good or unpleasant) (focusing on the present moment – acknowledging and accepting our thoughts, feelings, and the physical sensations of our body, without labelling them as good or bad)
relaxation.
Whatever our fears, anxieties, or phobias are, there is always someone who can help. Your doctor can assist you in developing a therapy plan to combat your worries.
You can also run to a therapist who is specialised in handling such case to assist you get yourself back, you can also try other options that is safe to assist you fight your fear cases that are not helpful to you or your environ.
***Have a great day... Rafd9828***
Love her if you can, help her if you really mean it.
In my last article I posted on read.cash platform where I was talking about how one can handle one's emotions and learn how to stay with a temperamental partner in a relationship. And I used my relationship to make an instance where my good friend advised me with some steps I need to know on how I can stay with my partner who seem to have temperament challenges. http://read.cash
After listening to him and applying all the advise he gave me, I began to enjoy my relationship, I can now stay happily with my partner even when we have issues, Also I am able to understand her more better and find a way to handle every issue that comes around peaceful.
Due to the positive results and changes I have experienced so far from the step I took in our relationship, I decided to look for a way out to help my girlfriend to get more better in handling her temperament challenges. Because I really love my girlfriend, I promised myself I was going to help her control her temperament, I went Into research on how I can make her take control of her special gift, I came across so many articles and journals on how to manage anger issues by different authors both online and on other platforms.
From the books and articles I read, I had to come up with some of the important information that can help my girlfriend to overcome and take control of her temperament to a minimal level. Although it's not going to be easy and I am also not expecting her to learn and change immediately, I know it's going to be a gradual process which I believe God to make it easy for us to get through with and be better.
These are some important information I think will help my girlfriend and any other person having temperament issues with his or her spouses.
*The steps are as follows;*
**MY LOVE PLEASE BEFORE YOU SPEAK, CONSIDER YOUR OPTIONS.**
It's easy to say something you'll later regret in the heat of the moment. Before you say anything, take a few moments to gather your thoughts. Allow others who are involved in the problem to do the same.
**MY LOVE PLEASE WHEN YOU ARE AT EASE, EXPLAIN YOUR PROBLEMS.**
Express your dissatisfaction in an authoritative but nonconfrontational manner as soon as you can think clearly. Express your problems and needs plainly and directly, without offending or controlling people.
**MY LOVE YOU NEED SOME EXERCISE**
Physical activity can help reduce stress that can cause you to become angry. If you feel your anger escalating, go for a brisk walk or run. Or spend some time doing other enjoyable physical activities.
**YOU NEED TO TAKE A BREAK**
Timeouts are not just for children. Allow yourself short breaks at stressful times of the day. A few moments of silence may help you feel more equipped to deal with what comes next without becoming irritated or upset.
**ALWAYS DETERMINE POTENTIAL SOLUTIONS TO SOLVE THE SITUATION**
Instead of focusing on what made you angry, work on resolving the current problem. Is your child's dirty room bothering you? Shut the door. Is your boyfriend always late for dinner? Plan your meals for later in the evening. Or accept to eat alone a couple times a week. Also, recognize that certain situations are simply beyond your control. Be honest about what you can and cannot change. Remind yourself that anger will not solve anything and may even make things worse.
**MY LOVE ALWAYS MAKE USE OF "I" STATEMENTS ONLY**
Criticizing or assigning blame may exacerbate conflict. Instead, characterize the issue using "I" sentences. Be specific and respectful. For example, instead of saying, ***"You never do any housework,"*** say, ***"I'm disappointed that you left the table without offering to help with the dishes."***
**MY LOVE NEVER KEEP A GRUDGE.**
Forgiveness is a potent weapon. If you allow anger and other bad emotions to crowd out happy emotions, you may become overwhelmed by your own bitterness or sense of injustice. Forgiving someone who has irritated you may help you learn from the experience while also strengthening your friendship.
**MY LOVE ALWAYS USE HUMOR TO RELIEVE STRESS.**
Lightening up can assist to relieve tension. Use humor to help you confront what is causing you to be angry, as well as any unreasonable expectations you have for how things should happen. Sarcasm, on the other hand, can damage feelings and make matters worse.
**YOU NEED TO EXERCISE YOUR RELAXING ABILITIES.**
Put your relaxation abilities to use when your temper rises. Deep breathing exercises, imagining a peaceful location, or repeating a calming word or phrase, such as ***"Take it easy,"*** can all help. You might also listen to music, write in a journal, or do a few yoga positions if you want to relax.
**MY LOVE PLEASE KNOW WHEN TO SEEK ASSISTANCE.**
Learning to control one's wrath might be difficult at times. Seek help for rage problems. If your anger appears out of control, drives you to do things you later regret, or causes you to harm those around you.
Finally all I want is for her to get hold of herself and take control of this unique and special gift. I believe also that if we can take control of our temperament, we can experience a lot of good moments together and be happy always.
***Thanks for reading my article. Rafd******9828******....***
Oh! she is so temperamental, but I really do love her.
*****"I have not been myself ever since I got to notice that the woman I so much have strong feelings and affections for has temperamental issues, and I don't want to lose her because she complements me in full and I love her so much, what do I do my friend?".*****
This was the complaint I made to my friend as we were having our discussion at his place, it was a serious issue for me to handle as I have never experienced such kind of personality with such attitude in my years of dating and being in a relationship.
Because I really love her so much and I want to be part of her and ready to do anything to change her into becoming a better person in our relationship, I went to my trusted friend to seek advice and assistance on what to do to make things right between us.
My friend having heard what I said concerning my partner's temperamental issue, he advised me to never let her go if I truly love her, he said that temperamental persons are special kind of people with great potentials and gift. In fact he said that those characters they possess are special kind of gift which they carry that helps them to protect themselves against any kind of danger or intimidation from anybody that they feel or see as a threat to their life or environ.
The only disadvantage about their kind is that they don't know how to control such gift even when it comes to people they care about and love so much.
But people with such character can be loved, cared for and even find a way to learn how to live with them if you are sure you love them and want to help them to control their temperament to become more better.
According to my friend he said if I must learn how to live with my partner who has temperamental issue, There are steps I must learn and follow to live happily after with her if I insist that I want to spend the rest of my life with her as my wife.
These steps are as follows;
****SHOW HER MATURITY****
A temperamental companion will constantly frustrate you, but your experience and exposure to life's hardships will be the guiding forces. Because you are aware of your partner's temperamental tendencies, you should not do the same. To deal with such issues in a relationship, you must be strong and very mature in all level of your relationship with your spouse.
****RESPECT HER, DO NOT ARGUE****
Respect her for who she is, and you will be surprised at how much she will return your respect since you are aware of her flaws and weaknesses, yet you manage her with care. She may not always give you what you want right away, but she will eventually arrive to see to it. When it comes to arguments or misunderstandings, give a temperamental partner room; you can't win when dealing with a temperamental person, but you can change and win them over; it's a gradual process.
****SURPRISE HER****
As a temperamental partner, there is no one who does not enjoy surprises. Instead of disputing with her, tell her she is correct and go on, even though you know she is incorrect.
After a few days, present proof to prove the outcome of the argument and to prove her wrong. Do this in a romantic manner, preferably while she is in a good mood. Temperamental people are human and can reason well; it's only in their nature to be angry, and the majority of them do not enjoy their acts and feel terrible for themselves after they have done wrong.
****SHOW HER TRUE LOVE****
The degree to which you love your partner impacts how strongly you desire positive change in their lives. Be kind to her despite her defects, love her despite their flaws, adore her at all costs, and forgive her for herr wrongs since she aren't the ones doing the things you think she does, she is feeble minded.
****BE PATIENCE WITH HER****
If she come in hot, don't take it hot; since you're the one who's going to make the change, you'll have to cool down till you reach a positive result in changing her. Your patience will not speak for you right now because you are still dealing with her, but you will gradually see the results, which may take years. You must take your time to change a temperamental companion, whether you are married or still in a relationship.
****ALWAYS STAY SILENT****
Keeping silence during an argument is a sensible method to deal with when you find yourself in such situation. One secret about a temperamental persons is that they dislike it when you dispute with them or get angry with them. Another thing a temperamental person dislikes is being defeated.
To deal with such a person, you must play along and do the opposite of what he or she prefers. The best course of action is to remain silent. No matter how she respond, speak, insult, or damage you, try to remain calm and silent as much as possible.
****HAVE A GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS WITH HER****
You may easily help your partner realize concerns that may cause tension in a relationship if you have good communication skills with her. A good communication skill is the ability to exchange words without causing misunderstanding. True, arguments are unavoidable in a relationship, but with the correct communication skills, you can easily handle and calm a temperamental spouse with kind and loving words.
****LEARN TO UNDERSTAND HER****
Knowing her temperament in a relationship will help you grasp what she is capable of. Make her to realize that she is mistaken. To deal with a temperament partner, use solid communication skills to convince her to understand who is at fault. You should not push her to comprehend your point of view, but you may manage her with gentle words.
****ALWAYS PRAY FOR HER****
Prayer is still the most powerful technique for dealing with problems in your relationship in everything, every obstacle, and every problem. Continue to pray for your relationship, and ask God for wisdom and patience to help and change the person you love.
****BE HOPEFUL****
As you do all of these things to deal with temperament, remain hopeful for a positive change, do not deviate from altering a temperamental spouse; your sacrifice may be worth it in the end; and do it with honour, respect, and love.
Temperamental people are kind and caring, all you need are the correct tools to deal with a temperamental relationship. Remember that this can also be found in both gender so therefore, you have to find the one that works for you and stay in that path in order to live happily with your spouse in your relationships.
***Have a great day. Rafd9828***
So this is who I am.
It all started when I was trying to find my way to greatness, when every thing I know that existed was how to make a great difference. I never thought anything different from it. My focus was solely on getting it right. The feeling was really an undistracted one, nothing matters again if it's not getting it the right way. This was how I was feeling in my heart and how I wanted to get things around me perfectly correct. So I pushed and hustled all the days and all times I was opportune to see the light of the day till this moment.
Well during my periods of trying to get things right in my life and make a great difference, I made sure of following these important steps that helped to guide me in making the right decisions on every step I took on my way. The steps are as follows;
**PRAYER**
You already know that prayer is the key to open every door and when you make your first step forward with prayers, involving God in your dealings and programs first, surely the outcome usually end in success, I believed in the power of praying without season and that helped me to scale through my challenges. I made praying to God always my best part of me in making the right steps to greatness.
**SET A PLAN**
when you want to start anything in life without proper plan, you are bound to fail. So I made the decision to always have a workable plan each day of my life. The things I need to achieve each day must be well planned and implemented accordingly so that I can have the anticipated result at each end of the day. These plans may take a day, weeks or even months to come to actualisation, but whether it takes longer time to happen, what is important is that you had a plan each action you want to carry out. When you plan very well, surely the process it will take you to achieve your goals may not be too difficult for you at the end of it all.
**STAY FOCUSED AND DON'T BE DISTRACTED**
When ever you make a decision to achieve a set goal, you must never lose focus and be distracted whatsoever, although challenges and disappointments may come in-between your way as you try to stay in the lane to greatness, but don't ever give in to distractions and lose focus no matter what. I made it a point of duty never to allow my fears and challenges push me off the track in my course of pursing greatness.
**NEVER LET YOUR FAILURES CHOOSE YOUR BEST MOMENTS FOR YOU**
Yes this stage in life is what most people refuse to pay attention to, to know how to stand, take the right control and make the right choice for the moment you want to experience. I never allowed my failure to dictate and make the decisions for me and how I can experience the moments in my life. I always make sure that I leave behind my bad moments, unsuccessful endeavours and deals, etc. I always take charge and control of the moment I want to experience.
**SPENDING QUALITY TIME ALONE AND HAVING A GOOD REST**
I made it so important and compulsory to always spend quality time all alone to myself so I can have enough time to think out new ideas. You know when you have a relaxed mind, you surely will think out new ideas that can change the world positively. Having to spend more time alone and rest well can also make you live longer and healthier than when you don't have any of these lifestyles taken serious in your life.
**BE CONSISTENT IN ANYTHING YOU FIND YOUR HAND TO DO**
No matter what was coming my way, I never discouraged myself from pushing harder and being consistent in that I find my hand to do, I made it a habit never to look down on my little beginning. Yes it may not go according to plan and expectations at early stage when you start, but one thing I know is that it will surely make a great difference if you keep being consistent in anything you are doing at that moment.
**NOT TAKING A NO FOR AN ANSWER**
I don't take a no for an answer, I always do my best to find a solution to whatever challenge or stumbling block that come my way. The zeal to find a solution on any problems or challenges that comes my way is what gives me the energy each time to make a great difference. I don't give up so easy on any task I place my heart to achieve even when it's so tough and challenging.
**I ALWAYS PUT MY HEART WITHIN THE CONFINE OF LOVE**
When you want to experience the true meaning and feeling of life, you have to put your heart within the terrain of love, love yourself and extend same love to other people around. I never allowed my heart to run out of love to myself and to people I come across with, even when they act in a manner that doesn't suit your heart. Letting your heart feel love for people that come around you each day of your love is the key to a fulfilling day.
**I ALWAYS GIVE PEACE A CHANCE**
Giving peace a chance with my fellow neighbor has been my desire all day long, no matter our individual differences, I am not an imperfect being, sometimes I get so irrational and act weird as a person but I always make sure at the end of the day I make peace with anybody that I wronged or wronged me, I always allow apologizes like *"I Am Sorry", "Please Forgive Me"* to never depart my lips each time I go wrong or offend my neighbors and friends.
These and many more are the stuffs I am made of, I know I am not a perfect being but someone who is out to learn and make a better life from the environment and people he finds himself with, I wish to continue living the life of helping others to be happy and creating a happy moment for people around as long as I live.
***Thanks for coming by to read my article today. Rafd******9828******.....***
Revival of the inner mind for greatness.
Our lives and destines are designed and planned by God who created the earth, he gave us different abilities and skillss to make good use of in every aspect of life we find ourselves. These gifts are given to us to liberate us from our individual mental slaveries, oppressions and stagnations of all kinds, and if we fail to maximize these great gifts to effect a positive change to our lives and to the system we find ourselves, then we have totally failed as a person to ourselves and to our maker.
Why most people we see today fail to achieve their dreams with the gift God gave them is because, they don't believe that they could ever be who they want to be and who they are meant to be in life. They first accept what the day bring to their table, they don't see beyond their present state that they could be better than where they are at that time. They see everything happening around them as the way it supposed to be, everything seems okay and fine so therefore, we don't need to push further or make extra sacrifice to change our situations.
This state of mindset and mentality have put alot of people in the state of stagnations and unproductive result at the end of their stay on earth. The way most young people of nowadays take pleasure in the things that can ruin them rather then things that can make them is very alarming in our society today, young people now seek fast and easy way of making it in life rather than following the right process, they go into crimes and all manner of dubious ways of making wealth and living life all because they feel it's the right thing and the easiest way to make it big, they throw away their potentials and God given talents and gifts away and start to find means of livelihood and survival on the wrong path of life.
***Do you ever believe that you can find that which you are looking for when you cover your eyes with a piece of a cloth?, or do you feel you could see through the dark path when you go on through that path without a flashlight torch to see your way through?.***
You can not understand this that I am saying right now when you still have this believe and mindset that you can make it through dubious means. Remember, there is a right process to make it in life, both in life fulfillments and wealth acquisitions.
***Have you thought about going through the right channel, the right process to achieve that goal you are looking for?***
***Have you thought about reviving that your inner mind for greatness through legitimate way?***
What most of us don't know about living right and following the right process to achieve our heart desires and goals is that, you experience this special kind of fulfilling feeling, joy and utmost satisfaction of soul and body when you revive your inner mind to achieve greatness and follow through the right process to achieve that goal you have solely desired in your heart. The feeling is immeasurable and unimaginable.
The channel and paths through which you can make positive great difference are right before you, the only challenges we usually get is the ability to make the right decisions when the choices are thrown at our faces, and also making the right step towards achieving that greatness we so desire for, you know that no one can do that for you except yourself.
If you are willing and ready to revive your inner mind for greatness, there are steps you must never fail to follow in order to achieve positive result at the end of it all.
**1. ACCEPTANCE.**
You need to first accept that you have not reached where you supposed to be in life, hence the need to make a positive difference should be your paramount goal.
**2. RE-EXAMINE YOUR PAST EFFORTS AND STRATEGIES.**
Having the ability to revalue your efforts and strategies applied in your past activities and commitments in order to ascertain where you were having gaps and where you need to make adjustments and corrections is also a positive step in the right direction.
**3. LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES.**
You need to accept criticism from people and even from the one you give to yourself, learn from it and try again.
**4. DON'T GIVE ROOM TO THOUGHTS THAT CAN DEMORALISE YOUR SPIRIT TO KEEP PUSHING.**
when you look outside your window and see your neighbor doing well, don't feel bad about your own unsuccessful situation at the moment, rather try and encourage yourself that yours is surely coming if only you can be patient with yourself and add extra effort in that goal you are pursuing. Let other people's success be a source of encouragement and positive push for you to achieve greatness.
**5. BELIEVE IN YOURSELF.**
Success comes to those that believe in themselves and in their ability no matter the condition they find themselves and the time it takes. Don't ever look down on yourself and feel that you are not trying your best in that thing your hand finds doing. When you believe in yourself, there is always a positive result at the end of it all.
**6. ALWAYS PRAY.**
No matter the type of goal and dreams you are pursuing in life, you need the grace of God to achieve that success you sole desire in your life, you need to keep your faith alive in that God you believe and pray to no matter the religion you are practicing. Always put God first and his directions as you strive to succeed.
**IN CONCLUSION**
This is so important to life if we can try our best to seek for greatness through the right means and channel. You don't need to accept that easiest way of life that will hurt the next person sitting beside you. Always remember that there is dignity in labour, so do your best to find that path that will give you satisfaction of heart after seeking that greatness at the end of the day.
**Have a great day my good friends. Rafd9828.**
The negative effect of love.
I want to start this article with the opposite of what you are expecting to hear from me. I know you will be expecting that I tell you stories about love and how sweet love is and all other stories that comes with. Well, I will burst your bubbles right now with the twist of the story.
You already know that love is a beautiful thing and can make one experience butterflies and all the good things that comes with it. The magical feelings that comes with the feeling of love and affection shared by the two love birds are so unquantifiable and so immeasurable.
***But has it occurred to you that the power of love can put one to a place of no ruin?***
***Have you ever thought that this thing called love can be able to make one lose control of him or herself and do things that will give you goose bumps when you hear the stories?.***
Most people have made themselves available to be led by the negative effect of love and what it can do and even cause them to change their destinies and futures all because they allowed themselves to be carried away by the negative effect of love.
Haven't you heard that to love someone you really have to open your eyes and also your mind to know what is going on with you as you put your head to love that person that is so dear to your heart. You have to take things easy and be very careful with it to avoid causing yourself more harm than good when you are In-love with your spouse.
Most people have lost their lives and even lost the most precious thing in their lives all because they were intoxicated with the power of love. Some have lost their loved ones, families and even their own personal sound due to what the power of love can do. You find yourself in a relationship and instead of you to take control of your feelings and emotions while in love with your partner, instead you allow yourself to be led by the power of love. When such happens, the result you always see is suicidal.
You hear stories of how people take their lives, destroy their properties and even cause havoc to that person they were once in love with all because of the way they allowed their mind and emotions to be taken away by the negative effect of love and the negative feelings it comes with to cloud their sense of reasoning not to take control and be in charge of their actions and behaviours.
I was a victim of such circumstances during my past relationship, the girl I was dating back then was so engulfed with love all over me, at first I was enjoying the treats, the feelings of love, affections and romance I was getting from her, Infact you could feel the energy when you come close to us, the feeling of love was so intense that we are not able to dictate any body's mistakes and excesses. A day came we had little argument that didn't end well, gradually the beautiful warm feeling of love, romance and affection we once shared together started turning into an iced blocks of water and before we could understand what was going on, it went out of hand and she immediately lost her control and things went bizarre and shattered.
One of the days she came to my house and destroyed my television and almost fought me. I was so confused and lost in deep thought over what was happening to the once cherished romance we had with each other that most people around us loved and wished they were in our shoes, the place we once had sweet experience and beautiful memories suddenly turned into an arena of gladiators.
Because of love she had for me, she was so hurt that she tried to do something that will hurt and pain my heart. She didn't care what her actions could result at the end of the day, she turned instantly the affection she had for me into a serious hatred.
So you see why most people fall in such situation, when you allow your heart to be taken away by the negative effect of power of love you feel for your partner, you will surely end up in regrets and ruins. This does not happen only to lovers and people in marriage relationships, it cut across other types of relationship we have today in our society today.
You see such cases in some of our parent attitudes toward their children. In a family where a mother gives her child that excess love, care and attention, when that child starts to misbehave and do certain things that are not acceptable by norms and right morals standards, the mother gets so mad and disappointed over that child's action because, she loved her and never believed her child could act in such manner, most cases the mother's treatment towards her child afterwards comes with sadness, anger and very bittered feelings to her child due to the way the child behaved.
When one mistakenly allow himself to be overwhelmed by the negative effect of love in his relationship with people in his life, the end product may usually not pleasing to that person you are in the relationship with. The negative effect of love is real and happens to people in their different relationships, so my dear always do your best to take control of your feelings and don't let it spoil that experience you have shared with your loved ones.
***Thanks and remain resolute. Rafd9828.***
Walk in strong, walk out stronger.
One important thing about life that every body who wants to survive should bear in mind is this, you are the only person that can fight your battle yourself, if you must need to win your battles, you must have faith, positive believe, right mind and thinking about any slightest step or decision you will take when you are faced with your battles.
Those that put fear first in front of them when they are in pursuit of what ever their heart desires, surely end up not getting the expectations and result they have hoped for. You may not necessarily need someone to speak to your spirit man when you are about to go in search of greatness, you may not have all the help and assistance to push forward in achieving your dreams, but one thing that you must always remember to hold firm and strong is your faith and persevering spirit to seek for success at all cost.
**FAITH**
First step towards achieving any thing in life is the level of your faith. If you have no faith in you in achieving your dreams, you don't need to expect a positive outcome, even the holy bible according to ***Matthew 17:20 where Jesus said "if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can move mountains"***. Jesus knew that faith is the key to achieving anything your heart so wishes to have. You can't look down on this first step and expect to achieve the rest of the results.
Even as a strong minded personality, if you don't have faith in what you are doing, you will be surprised what comes to your door step at the end of the day. Having the ability to work and achieve a particular goal is good, but when you add it up with faith, surely the outcome is success.
**HARDWORKING**
You know that faith without work is unproductive and dead at arrival. So you have to tell yourself the truth about the need to put that faith to work, as your spirit is strong, you can't come out stronger in that thing your hand finds doing if you don't back up your faith with work. You must find something to do in order to make your faith fruitful and productive at the end. Sometimes you may have all the needed physical tools to achieve that particular goal, but because in your heart you don't have that faith inside you, it will be so very challenging pulling through and getting the desired result.
**PLANNING**
One particular mistake people usually make that is expensive is the inability to have a workable plan when they are pursuing a particular goal. You may feel you have everything a person should have in order to achieve success, but when you don't plan well or have a workable plan at the end of it all, walking out stronger will be so difficult for you to achieve. Proper planning begets good result.
**ABILITY TO ACCEPT CRITICISM WHEN NECESSARY.**
when you become afraid of what people will say to you when you happen to make mistake, you will be avoiding anything that will bring criticism to your way. You may not understand that when you are been criticized over a work or over a mistake you made, if you can bend down and listen to that criticism with an unbiased mind, you will surely get to learn and improve yourself to a better person. Most people are so afraid of this stage in life and it's not out of place if I encourage people today to look in the right direction the criticism will bring to their path rather than looking for who to fight with for criticising them.
**ALWAYS DEVELOP THE HABIT OF PRAYING.**
if you ever hope to walk out stronger from where you walked in strong before, you really need to know and communicate with your God always so that you can be able to reach that attainment that will make you a happy person after. I believe in the power of prayer all the time and when ever you want to achieve a goal. So don't ever look down on praying at all season. In the holy bible, Christ Jesus also knew the importance of prayer that was why he said "***we should pray without season".***
Finally, there is no way you can ever remain the same if you eventually put these points in your dealings each day of your life. So my good friends, we have to believe that when you walk in strong, with all these points raised here are applied, surely you will walk out stronger at the end of it all.
***Thanks you for reading my article, always remember that rafd9828 loves you so much.***
Women are special kind of human, very unpredictable.
This past days have really been a hell of a hectic moment for me and relationship. Well it's obvious I am really trying to find a way around the challenges and misunderstandings I have been witnessing in my relationship.
It's not like I am trying to bring my love relationship in the public domain for discuss, rather I want to share my experience here for most people who may have been going through difficult moments in their relationship to learn from it and find a way to stay strong in it regardless of the situation and the effect of the heat they are getting in their different relationships.
Before I continue with the article, I want to use this medium to thank every person who has been in a healthy and happy relationship, it's really not an easy journey to venture in, but if you have the courage to be in it, it's really a beautiful and sweet memories with lots of both good and bad experiences to get. As people will always say ***" love is a beautiful thing".***
I will like to start with this important question; ***"what do women want"?***. This question has really been on the lips of majority of men who are into relationship, be it platonic relationship, marriage relationship or any other type of relationship that involves two opposite sex. As funny as the question may sound, the truth of the matter is, when you happen to be in a relationship with a woman, there are lots of experiences and actions you must witness in a woman that will warrant you to ask such question.
You already know that most women are so fragile and tender at heart in such a way that you need to be very careful in dealing with them, some are so hardened while some others are so soft, emotional and passionate that you need to be very careful while staying with them in a relationship.
Every woman has a specific qualities that differentiates her from the other, and when you feel you have the whole knowledge of all their behaviourial traits and have concluded in your heart that you have studied every woman around you, you will be surprised to see a new character that will take you off balance. I hear some people say that men are strong in their nature but in the reality of life, women are the stronger human species on earth.
***For you to say you are in full knowledge of a woman's body and attitude, it's just like saying you have the knowledge how the world was created by God.***
Have you been in a situation where you think you are doing your best to give your partner the best treat she can never forget, you buy her gifts and items, you spend quality time with her, give her attentions and all the necessary care she desires and deserve, when you do all of these things for her to be happy, she will love and shower you with lots of respect and her time, but immediately you wake up one morning to have little misunderstanding with her, the way she will react and the things she will say to you will shock you if you happen to record it and play it over and over again when the tension must have settled.
Just make a mistake of having a serious misunderstanding with her, she will forget all the sweet memories you did share with her, she will say horrible things that can pierce your heart just to get at you. She will forget that you were her all and all, she will behave in a manner that will put you in serious thinking that may lead you to heart attack or even take you to depression if care is not taken.
The last misunderstanding I had with my fiancee started with unimportant issues and things that are meaningless, before I knew what was going on, the whole issue turned into a serious argument, I was with my fiancee in a room but it was as if we were so far away from each other, our voices were on top of the mountains. We couldn't understand ourselves and after a while, we paused for sometime not talking to each other, then I immediately asked her one question, ***can you actually ask yourself what caused this heated argument?*** For some moments she couldn't say what really caused the misunderstanding. I then said to her, ***what exactly do you really want?*** Because I have asked myself this particular question what could have caused this, and up till now I have not been able to get the right answer to it, immediately she apologized and said I don't really understand what really happened.
Sincerely speaking this is one amongst the things we see every day with our partners. But one thing we always get after our misunderstanding when we settle our differences is our love and affection getting stronger after. To some it's destroys them.
When you feel you have known it all about women my dear, please check very well to see if you are sure of what you are saying, because women are like rivers that never end, thus it's fully impossible to understand them completely.
***Happy Sunday to you guys and thanks for reading my article. Rafd9828 appreciates your effort on read.cash.***
That's the way it is.
Hello guys, I am so glad to write today on read.cash and I believe you guys are also catching some fun and getting the vibe that read.cash is giving us all. For me I must commend read.cash and the randomrewarder for the much it's doing to encourage most of us even at this period of crypto currency dip, yet it has been steadfast and very generous to tip on our articles the much it can give to all of us.
It's not actually easy with the recent economic melt down and the world food shortage we are seeing day by day around the world as a result of war, terrorism, killings and other anti-social activities happening around our different communities and countries.
But what we must not fail to always preach about is peace, unity and love amongst us and amongst our various boundaries in our different countries. Of course we also know that it's by trying to keep peace, practice love and be at unity with one another that we can remain one and in harmony with each other. You need not to be worried about on how you can be of good behaviour to yourself and to your fellow neighbor, if only we can accept our individual differences and keep our cultural differences and social difference aside, embrace world peace and love even in our different ideologies and beliefs.
Let's come together and use one voice to speak to the four pillars of this great world we all are living in to help us fight for peace in our lands and countries. Why we have allowed the pestilence and trials to overcome us in this our present state is because, we fail to stay together serving as a watch dog over the life of the next person sitting beside us, we fail to stand in that path of truth that should always be our utmost desire to follow all the day long.
We must remember one important thing about life, that life is the only gift that can never be replaced with money or any cherished gift ever known to man, so therefore, it's proper to always live in that light of peace, love and harmony with in yourself and with your fellow neighbor.
I came online on read.cash and was having a deep thought on what to write today, but after having several brainstorm on the topic to write for my wonderful readers, I decided to bring up this topic which I feel should be the summary of every man's way of life towards himself and to his neighbour. Although I have written alot of articles and stories of different kinds, but I have never had this special likeness to this topic captioned ***"That's the way it is"***. Reason being that everything we do in this world should be based on love and peace.
So my dear readers and friends, please be good to people, do good to your society and to your country because that's the way it is.
Be the light to your family and to your friends.
If only we can get it right this time and place all our efforts to doing good, you will see all the problems we think we have disappearing before our very eyes.
Always learn to take care of people around you if you can.
Try your best to always do the right thing even when it will affect that person you truly love. Don't give yourself that opportunity to become weak in the eyes of your challenges and trial times.
And always stay positive in everything you do and aspire to get in future, because that's the way it is.
Thanks for staying by to read my article and also, thank you so much for never giving up on me even when I lost my way and couldn't continue writing, yet you were able to keep your promises and steadfast love in tipping every article you deem fit.
***God bless you so much, Rafd9828. Please make sure you go through my articles read and drop your comments and don't also forget to always use your thumb finger to do the needful on my comment section. Thanks..........***
We are prisoners in different chains.
I was listening to one of the legendary songs of lucky Dube titled prisoner, and it got to me that we are all in prison with different chains but we do not know that we are. You may be wondering why I am sounding this way right now, well it's not far fetched from the things we all are seeing every moment of our time. But let me take you to the memory lane where you can be able to understand me fully and have the knowledge about the reason why I said everybody in this world are in prison with chains and there is no way we can free ourselves except in death.
Right from the first day of our birth, we became prisoners and in different chains and shackles of life, right from the moment we open our eyes to see the first light of the day, that was the day we became prisoners to the dictates of what the day bring to our table. You can not tell yourself what you will face out there on every of your daily activities. Nobody knows what tomorrow will bring to the table.
Right from the first day we cried after been delivered from our mother's womb, at that moment we became prisoners to nature and all it came with.
Right from the moment we came into this world, that was the very first moment we became prisoners in chains and in shackles of the wickedness of man. Whether you avoid people or not you must have one person that does not like you as a person.
Right from the moment we started breathing outside our mother's womb, that was the moment we became prisoners and in chains to environmental pollutions and climate change dues to industrialization and modernization.
Right from the moment we were born and set free from our mother's womb, we became prisoners and in chains to every different kinds of habit both good and bad habits man ever know and practise through their attitudes and character displayed every day of their lives as humans.
Right from the moment we got to feel the taste of food as humans we became prisoners and in chains to hunger, we can't survive without food nor water, Infact no living thing can ever exist and survive without food and water.
Right from the day you and I were born into this world, we all became prisoners and in different chains to success and failure, whether you like it or not you must succeed or fail.
Right from the day we all came into this world, we became prisoners and in serious chains to different thoughts and feelings that unite us to each other or separates us. We became prisoners and in chains to love, affections and even to hate, disappointments, heartbreaks and sadness.
Right from the day we came into existence in this world, we became prisoners to insatiable wants and desires to anything money can get and also anything your hands can also reach. And even the ones your money and hand can't get, you so desire to get anything your heart wants.
We didn't even know that we are prisoners with different chains and shackles to ourselves from our inner thoughts( consciences) which we usually fight with each time we are faced with lots of options and choices to make on a particular thing. When a child is born, what comes to the child's mind is to watch and learn from his or her mother, from there the child starts acting and trying to display what he or she learnt from the mother and after that stage, the child tries to learn how to sit like other persons around him or her, at first the child becomes afraid to sit all by him or her self, but with support from the parents after making series of efforts to sit on his or her own, before you know it the child begins to sit and from sitting the child starts crawling, standing and walking as the stages proceed. All of these stages are played in the child's mind as he watch and learn how people around him or her behave.
The moment you understand that human life and all that revolves around it is based on the fact that we are existing and living our lives each moment under the dictates of a higher authority that we can not see, that supreme being is the one that writes our daily life story each day of our lives, we are actors that live and act in the dictates of that supreme being we do not see. We are all prisoners in chain so long as you are existing in the planet. The only time we will be free from being a prisoner, free from the shackles and chains in our lives is when we finally stop breathing and we are no more. Apart from that, it's so difficult for us to free ourselves from these chains that already holding us down from birth.
We have our different and individual chains and prisoners to every single decision, lifestyle and attitude we showcase to ourselves and to people around us and even to the way we live our lives every day.
Today I urge you to always find a way to live happily in your own shackles and chains as a prisoner for we are all in our different chains and prisons living our lives to the fullest.
***I really appreciate your kind visit to my post and reading my article . You are also free to go through all my articles I have written so far to read and drop your comments. Thanks Rafd******9828******.***
To be a man is not a day's job.
*"I wish I have all the strength and words to express myself, the words to write down the words of pain and hurt bleeding out from my heart at this moment.*
*The way I feel right now is like the same way a mother feels when she is seeing her only beloved child been taken away from her.*
*It's as if there is a sudden earthquake and the oceans and seas rising up to overflow and came out of its shores to carry away lives and properties, everybody running helter-skelter for their lives and no one is sure of what will happen the next moment.*
*My heart right now is so clouded with lots of confusion and lost because of the situation I have found myself, the day has suddenly turned night within a twinkle of the eyes.*
*I am just like a boat floating on top of the water with no one on it to control or paddle it, I can't get hold of the way I feel right now.*
*It's as if I have lost grip of myself and the only thing that could have held me back has also broken and taken away from my reach and I can't get to it anymore.*
*The state of mind I am right now is so worrisome and if I do not get help from God at this time I may eventually miss my way and get lost on the way that I may not know how to return again."*
I know right now you may be wondering why I am sounding this way in my article today, the truth is that I am facing serious emotional and physical challenges that is overwhelming and it's actually getting at me emotionally, physically and mentally. I have reached that junction where everything around me is as if it's has turned against me and no one to run to for help or assistance or even for direction or advise.
The feeling is so overwhelming and unimaginable. But let me not bore you with my personal challenges at the moment, let me share with us in my article today the major and important stages of life that are so challenging to man which every man should take proper notice about and make sure they cross the bridge when they come close to it.
There are three major stages in the life of man you need to know and actually need the grace of God to overcome or else it's wave may get you pushed over board and you lose your focus and direction. Those stages includes;
**SELF DEVELOPMENT (FINANCIAL, MENTAL AND PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT)**
This first stage in the life of a man comes with lots of distractions, challenges and confusions. To maintain a steady mental balance and focus on pursuing this stage usually gets challenging due to negative vises and forces that come with it. The challenges that comes while studying in school, learning a business and even serving as an applentice learning a particular trade in your master's business place is so heavy and if care is not taken you may find yourself not completing what ever training you are having at that particular stage due to the challenges it comes with.
Getting a good job, developing your business career and even starting up that new trade you learnt from your master comes with a lot of task, responsibility and challenges which if you are not careful, the result you get from the early period may discourage you and make you pull out and become unsuccessful in that field you find yourself.
Saving up from that business or career you have created for yourself to get an accomodation, buy car, acquire properties and make some investments is usually not easy to achieve in the life of a man. The challenges and difficulties that comes with trying to save up and do all the important and necessary investments and acquisitions is not really easy at all. There are lots of varieties of things to acquire and in that moment if you are not careful you may end up spending all your savings and go broke at the end of the day.
**MAKING THE RIGHT CHOICE OF PARTNER IN MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIP**
The second stage in the life of a man is also a challenging stage where it's so difficult for him to make that right choice who he will spend the rest of his life with in marriage. Sometimes it takes months, years and even some time for him to find that special person he is searching for. Due to confusion, some seek the help and face of God in making the right choice of the person they want to spend the rest of their lives with. In as much as you feel it's easy to get a woman to date and be in friendship with but when it gets to the stage of making a choice for that right person that will spend the rest of her life with you, then you will know that it is so challenging and difficult to achieve.
**RAISING A FAMILY AND TRAINING AND TAKING CARE OF THEM**
This third stage of life is also a very challenging and difficult stage in every man's life, at this point you are to give your best to make it happen, you have to pass through difficult and challenging times in other to achieve it. Giving your family a good life and good upbringing is not an easy task and responsibilities to achieve, you may lose yourself while trying to give them a better life and future. This stage usually gets men so challenging and tasking. When you try your best to make sure everything is well provided for your family, it requires your strength, commitment to what ever you are doing to provide your family that good life, so sometimes it's comes with lots of effort and that can make man get mentally unstable and disturbed most times especially when you are thinking on what to do to make it happen for you and your family.
**IN CONCLUSION**
It's really not easy for everyone who wish to become man and take responsibility of a man in his life. Sometimes it's hard and frustrating most especially when you are not getting positive results from the effort you are putting in that thing you are doing. The mental and emotional feelings one gets from the negative result he receives each endeavour he puts himself up for each time can not be fathomed. Men usually go through a lot of mental, psychological challenges in them when they are faced with challenges that overwhelms them in their life struggle. But in all of these challenges we get from our struggles we still stand tall raising our shoulders high and making sure that we don't give up so easily to the face of challenges that come to us as men.
To be a man is not a day's job. So please man up and surely God will help us all to succeed.
***Thanks for reading my article. Rafd9828***
Faking reality.
The world we live in is filled with lots of uncertainties, different lifestyles, unimaginable stories and life experiences of people in relationships, experience amongst friends, lovers and family relatives.
All these experiences are shared and received by people that make up the world we all live in. These experiences maybe received through fake life or real life characters people exhibit while living and going about their normal duties and businesses of the day.
We live in a world where artificial lifestyle have become the best choice for many to prove to themselves and to others that they are doing a great deal in their lives and living well.
People go about faking realities with what they do not have and even with what their hands can not reach, putting other people at serious regrets and disappointments who have tried so hard to work out their daily bread in a legit way yet they can not find something rewarding from their hard work and effort.
Because you want people to count you as one of the happening guys in town, instead of you to work hard on your personality, follow the right way to make wealth and improve yourself, you choose to lie to people, scam those that give you their trust, you go behind their back to steal their ideas and works they entrust in your hand with trust with your fake identities all in the name you want to get rich. The words from your mouth can never be trusted because you feel it's the right way of life to always lie and deceive people, get away with it and even get your way in to what ever you wish in life. You don't consider the negative psychological effects those your words can give to that person's emotion and feelings you are lying to.
Today the world is fast changing to the level where everything and everyone is letting go of the true way of living and embracing that path that will put everyone and the world at risk just because we have decided to fake our realities.
*Let me burst your bubbles at this time for you to actually understand more about this topic I am discussing right now.*
**POLITICS**
In my country Nigeria, why the populace are suffering today in the hands of those they entrust their votes with to lead them right is because, the people they voted in to lead them right have left their promises and political structure made to people to start playing with the minds of their citizenry, they come online and all the social media platforms to tell lies of what they have achieved so far since they were elected into the government offices and positions while in reality they have not even done anything nor any of those project they come online to claim to have done. They fake realities in the eyes of the populace that elected them with unrealistic stories, projects and promises to get them vote for them again and again in the next election.
**RELATIONSHIP**
You will agree with me that most relationships and marriages that we hear on the news that got separated or broken is as a result of faking realities in the part of both parties, where they don't begin their relationship with truth and sincerity. Remember when you build your relationship on the foundation of lies, deceits and all manner of promises that are not true which can not be fulfilled at the end of the day, divorce, separation and breakup are surely what you get at the end of the day.
**BUSINESS DEALS**
This can also be seen as a hindrance in the lives of individuals who tend to partner together to achieve a business success in their dealings. When there is no atom of truth, open mind amongst the partners and lack of trust to build a strong tie in their business deals and relationship, surely the outcome usually get bizarre. When you build your business relation under the pretence of fake realities, the result you get is actually not going to be a successful one at the end.
**SOCIAL LIFE**
Many people you see today who try to impress others with things that their hands can not reach go far with faking lifestyles and realities, and when you put yourself in such situation, you will surely get disappointments and regrets at the end of it all. Just because you saw that your friend bought a new car, you lend the car from your friend and use that same car to pose to people as your own car, bragging with another person's property just to gain respect from them while in the reality of life you are just making a fool of yourself, because one day they will eventually know the true story. You go on social media platforms to live a fake life with people, pretending what you are not just to gain followership, likes and comments from people, living a deceitful lifestyle.
**IN CONCLUSION**
There are other aspects of life which you and I know today where people throw fake realities to people around them just to achieve their selfish gains and nothing more. The truth you always need to tell yourself right now is, where am I heading to with all these fake realities I have actually lived with all these period of time? If you actually feel you are doing a great deal with it and it's working good for you please continue, but if you see yourself not making a head way with such lifestyle, please make a change to live right and better, because faking realities in life can never bring you that satisfaction and fulfilment you wish to have in life. Remember no matter what you do, you have to always put yourself in that person's shoe that you are using your fake life to impress and deceive.
**Thank you for reading my article. Rafd9828 is back and better...** *You are free to sponsor and go through all my post on read.cash to read my previous articles that will improve your life and your mindset.*
There is no definite pattern to marriage.
***Once again my dear friends reading my article, I greet you with every love in me this awesome day, I believe we are getting the best of experience in this platform called read.cash. anyways if you are yet to experience this awesome feeling being in this platform, I advise you to drop what ever that is distracting you behind and come to read.cash to experience new information that will make your day a better one.***
Today I will be discussing with you about marriage and the way people think and feel couples should live in their marriages to achieve happiness and peace amongst them.
In my own opinion after a careful observations and studies I made on different married couples around me, I want to inform you that there is no definite pattern of lifestyle couples in marriage should live their lives while living together in marriage. In otherwords, marriage does not have a definite style, handout, manual or a specific method of living couples in marriage should follow in order to follow, live and perform their marital duties and functions in our society today and the world at large in order to make their marriage a success. The way you live with your partner in marriage can never be the same way the next person sitting beside you should be expected to live and act with their partner in their own relationship as married couples.
You will agree with me that marriage is a vocation instituted by God on its own to mankind where two different persons with different mindsets, different personalities and individual understanding come together to live as one in marriage, to be each other's companion and to raise a family together. So it's imperative to note that the method of living and attitudinal behaviour of the parties involved in the marriage between Mr and Mrs A can not be as the same with Mr and Mrs B. The way you experience your marriage with your partner is determined by the way you two understand your love with each other, and the way you agree to share experience with each other and make your marriage work successfully.
In one of the marriage classes I have been attending, my teacher told us that in marriage you are to find what works for you and your partner and live in that path with your partner happily. To find what works for you and your partner in marriage, you have to study each other and know your likes and dislikes, knowing your partner's temperaments, emotions, feelings, strength and weakness so as to be able to live with your partner in that path that works for the both of you in your marriage relationships.
Remember that what you saw in your partner's life before going for him or her might be different from what the other person saw in his or her own partner's life before going for their love and also seeking for hand in marriage. So there can never be a definite method of living with your partner in marriage as same with the other partners in their marriages as well.
In my little experience I had with my fiancee during courtship, I had a knowledge of some weird characters that I have never seen before which were alittle difficult for me to live with in my first two months with her during courtship, but because I love her so much and I want to make the marriage relationship with her work successfully, I had to find a way around it to blend in that her lifestyle for us to live happily after, I got to understand that it was part of her and she can't change it even when she tried so hard to, so I understood her and adjusted myself to accept and live with her irrespective of her imperfections. Same way she found mine and learnt to adjust in other to live with me.
Now if I should read books online about marriages and try to follow exactly the same instructions out of the experience the writer had in his marriage before writing his books to live and practice with my partner who has a different attitude, psychological and emotional feelings and understanding, what would you think will happen in my marriage?. If marriage has a definite way of living and I found out that my partner has a character that does not fit into that pattern of marriage style the author explained in his books on marriage out of his or personal experience and thought, should I then leave my partner and end the relationship just because he or she could not fit into that process and style? The answer is No!
Why some marriages fail in their different homes in recent times is because they don't devise a means to create their own path to follow, live and have beautiful memories and experiences with their partner. You go online and read books and articles about successful marriages, mind you I am not saying that reading online books on marriages are bad, but what I am trying to say is that those articles and books you read on marriage were written out of experiences those authors had when they were married with their partners which worked for them, it may work out for them but may not be the same for you reading it, reason that your partner may not have the same behavioural characteristics or have the same temperaments and understanding just the same way the person the author had experience with in marriage before writing the book.
For any reason you want to read online books and articles on successful marriages and take a leaf from it, you also need to understand your partner's mental status, emotional and physical capacity and capabilities if at all you wish to apply the instructions in your own marriage relationship with your own partner.
Just find what works for you and your partner and build your marriage relationship on it and I assure you that you will live happily in marriage with your partner.
Learn and study each other and try to open your minds to accept criticism, corrections from each other when needed, and never allow your criticisms and corrections overshadow the love you both share with each other, correct each other with love.
***Thanks for reading my article. Rafd******9828******...***
The salt's natural flavor has started to fade.
I don't really know where to start from and where to go from here, looking at the happenings around us in recent times, you will agree with me that the world is changing and it's really changing fast, like the flashes of light and a fast running car that lost control pushing forward to where one can not take control of the wheel.
I have wondered in deep thought what could actually be the reason why Christianity as a religion in the west is gradually fading away in the minds and hearts of the same people that their fore-fathers came to Africa and other parts of the continents of the world to introduce Christianity religion that our fore-fathers and us accepted and practised till date.
To be frank, I got baffled when I came across a particular short video some days ago where someone in the western world was seen asking some persons at the gas filling station to quote any choice of the verse in the bible they know and read what the verse said off hand in return he will refill their cars for free, to my greatest surprise none of the persons he met at the gas station were able to pass the test.
The other time on the social media where someone was preaching at one of the streets in London and also in one of the streets of the cites in United States of America and some people called in the police on the preacher and he was taken away. These gospel preacher were charged with public disturbance and other offenses which I may not recount. You could see the humiliations and frustrations meted on these persons.
A friend of mine that lived in abroad in one of our chats via WhatsApp conversation, he told me that churches over there are gradually closing members and people most especially the younger generations are gradually not interested in attending to churches and religious activities. You could barely see a church filled with young people rather all you could see is mostly the older men and women. The youths in the western world these days lose interest more in the things that concern Christianity religion, they put more interest in parties, social media activities, non Christian related issues and activities.
Most people even denounce their faith easily and try to believe in what their hearts and minds tell them to believe in, some don't even want to try other religions, so they stay floating on the air without been attached to any religion what do ever.
***Now my questions are;***
*What really happened that made these same people that brought Christianity religion to us in the first place in Africa to lose interest in the same religion they brought to us?*
*Is there another hidden story that they know I mean the western world that we are yet to understand or be aware of?*
*Was the Christianity religion practise a means used by the white men our colonial masters to colonize the African continent and other continents where it's been practised till date?*
*Or is it that the people that brought Christianity to us are getting fade up gradually from their belief and faith their fore-fathers worshipped?*
These and many more questions going through my mind after I finished watching the video. *Now* *Should we then allow the salt's natural taste to gradually fade away?* This is a wake up call to all of us who still believe in the religion we practise (Christianity) to stand in the gap of prayers for one another to pray and seek God's face and directions towards the revival of the faith of these our brothers and sisters in the same faith that have fallen short, to find what could have went wrong that made the upcoming generation to lose interest in the things that concern Christianity religion, to find a means to send back the gospel back to them, preaching to them about the importance of holding firm on God, going back to know more about God and trusting in his words for a new life and a new beginning.
Some how Science and technology has brought social media space and innovative approaches that have shifted the minds of the young ones away from making out time to come close to know the word of God through reading their Bible, even when most people have tried to use social media and technology to project the message of Christ to the world, yet few persons make use of those opportunities to improve their faith while majority create distractions with this innovations.
We can actually make this work again, we can start right now to change the narrative and we can use this time to set things right again. In as much as there are lots of thought still going through my mind about the video I saw days back, I will not believe and entertain that thought about Christianity religion a means to scam the African continents as some people claim, I will not also believe that there are other hidden truths that we are yet to know about the Introduction of Christianity religion and it's practises by the missionaries and our colonial masters, but I will always believe this, that whether some people failed to keep holding unto their faith and believe, I will surely not lose my faith in the religion I practise today which is Christianity religion.
Let us today be the carrier of the word, let us put more effort to make the salt gain it's taste in our own time and let us fix these lapses in our own time and surely we will be fulfilled and blessed for helping a brother's dieing faith to be alive again.
***Thank you for your time. Rafd******9828******....***
The best signs to know who really loves you.
Have you been a relationship with your spouse and you begin to imagine if the person you are with in a relationship is actually reciprocating your love and being real with you?. When you're dating someone, you frequently question whether he or she is sincere about you. It can be challenging to read your partner's emotions since some couples simply aren't very skilled at communicating their sentiments. Additionally, you can run into some people who act like they care about you but truly don't give a damn. Then there are some persons who are for keep; these are the ones that confess their love and treat you with kindness. ***How do you determine whether the person you're dating honestly and sincerely loves you?.***
****For proper understanding of this article, I will be using male partner as a case study.****
He might not vocally express his love for you, yet he might still give away the fact that he is madly in love with you. If you ask us, it looks pretty black and white. You can always tell when someone is truly in love with you because they go out of their way to make you feel unique. But if you're still unsure whether he loves you or not, keep reading to learn the blatant signals that he does.
**HERE ARE SOME EVIDENCES OF HIS INTENSE AFFECTION FOR YOU.**
****He gives you his time.****
Everyone has a busy schedule and frequently changes plans. not with your man, though. Even if it's only for a little while, he makes the effort to spend time with you and see you.
****You feel secure around him.****
When they are in love with a woman, men like to make her feel safe and protected. To convince you of that, they don't necessarily have to knock out someone's teeth. In trying circumstances, he will just be by your side.
****He values your viewpoint.****
Even if the two of you come to different conclusions, he respects your choice. Even when he disagrees with you, he considers everything you say.
****He honours his commitments.****
He keeps his promises. A man who values and cares for you will always honour his commitments. He may forget some little particulars, but not the significant ones that are important to the connection.
****He introduces his family to you.****
Serious people don't keep their feelings from their friends and family. They only continue their connection when they believe that it won't be successful soon. Therefore, you can be sure that your partner is in love with you if he presents you to his family and friends.
****He wants more intimacy.****
We are not talking about sexual intimacy here, we’re talking about the random pokes or never missing a chance to hug you. If he loves you, he will feel a constant need to hold your hand, kiss or simply care for you.
****He backs your aspirations.****
True love is first seen when your partner encourages you to stay on the road you've chosen rather than attempting to forge one for you. If not, it may be difficult to decide between the person you love and what you were supposed to do.
****He starts a conversation.****
It's excellent if you observe a rise in the volume of texts or calls. This indicates that he enjoys speaking with you and wants to hear your voice.
****He doesn’t judge you for your craziness.****
Sometimes women do act a bit crazy, some more than others. But your man doesn’t mind the crazy in you and you don’t feel shy to be yourself when you’re with them. They make you feel comfortable in your skin without judging you for anything.
****Compromise in your relationship is a two-way street.****
Every partner in a relationship needs to make certain sacrifices. But occasionally one partner ends up making more sacrifices than the other. However, it is a clear sign that your boyfriend loves you when you notice that concessions are not coming solely from your side.
****He desires closer intimacy.****
We're not referring to intimate physical contact; rather, we're referring to the infrequent prods or constant hugs. If he truly loves you, he will always want to hold your hand, kiss you, or just be there for you.
****He does not condemn you for being crazy.****
Some more than others, but sometimes ladies do act a little crazy. However, your man doesn't mind that you're insane, so you don't feel embarrassed to be who you really are with them. Without passing judgment on you in any way, they help you feel comfortable in your own skin.
If you really want to know how true his love is to you, these are the signs you need to check out for, and it's also applicable to the guys who wants to know if their spouses are In-love with them even when they hide their feelings away from them. It's important that you check out for all these signs so that you don't end up living and living with the wrong person in a relationship.
***Thanks for reading my article. Rafd******9828******.***
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The part I never liked.
Sometimes in life people feel it's their right and privilege to make people do things in their own favour, they feel it's in your own interest to always give and give at all times to them, making them to be at the receiving end at every moment you are with them in a relationship. They don't ever thing it's also a two way thing where everyone do their own very best to give and contribute for the growth and success of the relationship which they agree to start as couple.
Why most marriages and relationships turn out soar in most cases in our society of late are as a result of the type of ideology and mindset the persons involved had before coming together to start a relationship. Some ladies usually feel once you are the one that went to them for a relationship, it's your duty to provide all their responsibilities as you being the man and as someone that really went after them. You will see a situation where the man that saw a girl he loves and went after her, after getting to know each other and she gives you that acceptance to be in relationship with you, the next minute every of the her needs and wants automatically becomes the man's responsibility to cater for.
When you ask some of the ladies why they relinquish all their responsibilities to that man in their life, they will simply tell you ***"my dear don't you know it's your responsibility to cater for your woman's need",*** some will even go further to tell you that "***it's money that they use in maintaining a woman"***. And these words when I hear some ladies respond in that manner I usually get confused and Speechless.
I ask myself these questions;
***Does it mean if one wants to get a good love and relationship it must be based on money?***
***Does it mean the reason for being in a relationship with your spouse simply for taking care of your own responsibilities and needs when ever you need them by your spouse?***
**Does it mean a lady can not take care of her needs by herself?**
Secondly, I have also come to understand and observe that most men also feel it's the sole responsibility of their partner to always cook dinner, lunch and even breakfast for them, serve them food, clean the dishes and the house, etc when ever they are together in a house. Some Men in relationship have this entitlement mentality that they hold unto when ever they are with their partner and they feel it's normal and their right to receive such treatment from their female partner. As funny as it may sound, these types of character and situations are seen in most relationships and I feel in my own opinion that it's not actually supposed to be allowed to happen, as a man in a relationship, your female partner is not your slave nor your maid that always do your bidding at all times. Sometimes you help your partner to do some chores in the house, cook and even do the dishes because if you truly understand the meaning relationship, ***it's simply for companionship where you help each other to be happy and safe in each other's arm.***
Also there is this particular character I usually notice in some persons who are in a relationship, individually you feel it's your right to act irrational at any given opportunity and moment when ever you are with your partner without considering how the other person will feel. You feel it's your right to show tantrums and your partner should not complain nor feel bad about it, but if your partner wakes up one morning and act the same way you start to get angry and feel bad just because he or she was the one that acted that way instead of you.
You feel he or she supposed not to get angry and misunderstand you each time you show some weird attitudes towards your partner, even when your partner show that dismay feeling or wear a sad face towards you because of the tantrums you displayed at him or her, you forget that you caused the reason why your spouse is angry due to your attitude, instead you get angry at your partner for being angry or showing his or her sad feelings for the way you acted.
In your different relationship moments with your partners, you may notice one or two weird characters that are not suitable to you and you try to live with it, it's not that these characters are actually the right way of living in a relationship, you choose to live with it because you feel you can deal with it. Indirectly It's affect the love you have for your spouse.
But the right understanding should be taken into consideration for a healthy relationship. You should understand that your spouse is not your slave nor your money bag that is meant to do everything for you, I am not saying if your partner feels he or she wants to take care of your needs at all times is a bad thing, what I am saying is that it should be on your partner personal acceptance to cater for you and your needs not on your command or dictates.
Also it's important that you see your partner as yourself, learn to give each other support in all things, no need of having to feel he or she owes you an entitlement or a responsibility of serving you at all times.
To actually feel true love from your spouse, you really need to be real and don't have to feel you are doing a favour to your spouse for accepting to date him or her. Learn to love and see your partner as yourself. I know you can't hurt yourself if you really love yourself.
***Thank you for your time. Rafd******9828******.....***
The right attitude.
The way you lead others is significantly impacted by your attitude. It has an impact on how you sell and interact with customers. How you interact with others, how you contribute to the culture of your workplace, and how you carry out your daily activities and obligations are all directly impacted by your attitude. Your attitude ultimately determines your happiness and success. If all else is equal, the winner will be the one who has the best attitude. When all else is equal, the winner is typically the one who has the best attitude. Unfortunately, a lot of people continue to hold onto ideas and behaviors that limit rather than enhance their effectiveness.
The truth is that your attitude is something you control. One of the few things you can control in life is your attitude.
There are different aspects of attitude I must discuss in this article so you can actually know where yours fall into.
***Describe attitude.***
Your attitude is how you approach life. It is the way you decide to interpret and react to things, people, situations, and even oneself. Your attitude is not a result of anything outside of you. You get to decide how you feel. Your thoughts are what shape your attitude, and you get to pick them. Your state of mind is something you designed. How you interpret and interpret the events of life and work is entirely up to you. You decide whether you have a positive or negative mindset. You must think more clearly if you want to feel better. Having a disciplined thought process is crucial if you want to feel positively.
Maintaining a proactive and upbeat attitude is one trait that sets continuously successful people apart. People who are successful think differently from normal people. Because the right force of successful people is driven by a proactive and positive mindset, they achieve superior results. They are able to concentrate completely on finding solutions, acting wisely, and improving themselves because pessimism, negativity, or cynicism are not occupying or detracting their thoughts.
***Positivity***
A disciplined and intentional style of viewing, considering, and reacting to life produces a good attitude. It involves mental training. It is done on purpose. It entails mental fortitude. Positive thinking does not minimize issues and is not naive. Instead, it recognizes and accepts issues before concentrating on opportunities and solutions. It searches for the opportunity hidden within the issue. Positivity has a habit-forming effect on both you and those around you. Positivity has a physical impact on you. Almost invariably, a person with an optimistic outlook will perform better than a person with a negative outlook.
***Negativity***
Poor thinking leads to a negative mindset. Lack of mental discipline is the cause. It zeroes down on the issue and gives up looking for possibilities or solutions. Only a regular diet of negative thoughts and self-talk can sustain a negative attitude. An unfavorable outlook is habit-forming and has an effect on both you and those around you. A bad attitude has an impact on your physical health. A pessimistic attitude nearly always results in defeat for the individual who has it. Sadly, a lot of people who have a bad attitude are caught in a downward spiral because they don't like the idea of changing their attitude. Being here is not a good idea!
***Conscious Thinking.***
You need to be careful and diligent about how you perceive and interpret events, situations, other people, and yourself if you want to have a good and proactive attitude. The ability to control your thoughts and feelings is crucial for maintaining a cheerful attitude because they are connected.
Paying attention to and controlling your self-talk is a crucial component of mental discipline. What you say to yourself about difficult circumstances is known as self-talk. It depends on how you choose to see and explain the things that are happening to you.
Controlling your self-talk is essential because words convey ideas, and ideas generate feelings.
***Simple practices to enhance attitude.***
1. Know yourself and your attitude. Stop allowing it to happen. Be mindful of it.
2. When your attitude veers toward the impulsive or negative, refocus, reframe, and react.
3. Be conscious of the situations and people that make you more likely to act disruptively.
4. Take control of your internal scripts and tales.
5. Develop the skill of positive self-talk. Does your language benefit or harm people? More than anyone else in your life, you talk to yourself. excel at it.
6. Recognize an issue when you see one. After that, concentrate on identifying chances for action and potential solutions. Immediately.
7. Eliminate blaming, complaining, and defensiveness from your life.
8. **Switch** the TV off. Develop yourself. Spend less time observing other people's life.
I believe you can have all the time to check your attitude and try to live right. ***Thanks for reading my article. Rafd******9828***
The honeybee and it's sting.
When we look at life and what it brings to the table each moment of our lives, we begin to imagine the purpose of life, it's meaning, and the reason why things turn out the way they are.
If you know the anatomy of the bee and it's features you will agree with me that the insect called bee is a very unique insect with so much great phenomenon. The bees are insects that produces the sweetest fluid in form of waste in their nest and also use that as their hosting platform for laying of eggs for reproductive and other processes. As this may sound, the bees are known to be one of the insects that stings to death if you come in contact with them at their bee hive. Their sting can give you an excruciating pain that you will never forget in a hurry if you have unfortunate encounter with them. Some may even lead to death as the case maybe. The bees can produce honey and also can give you sting that can give pain in life.
This little hint about the bees and their characteristics is what I will be looking at to share with your my experience with one lady I thought was doing a great deal for me when I met her and became friends with her.
***Disclaimer:*** *This article is not in any way written to derogate and deform the character of the lady I had encounter with but to serve as an instructional and learning tool for the readers who may want to take a leaf in such lifestyle. This article is also written based on my personal experience and can not be seen as the best option to choose when you find yourself in such situation.*
**Let me continue.....**
The experience we have and share in life may not necessarily be the type of life and experience we wish to have, but when they come to you, learn not to take it to heart and destroy that peace you have always grave for most especially when the experience is not a healthy one.
I met this lady during my period of searching for friendship that may lead to romance someday, boom! I went online and click-click before I could knew it I found her with her pretty smile and radiant beauty, I was caught by her fancy and immediately I typed hi and she responded and the rest was history.
The two of us happened to reside in Nigeria but in different states so we decided to start on a plain note where I told her that all I needed was to take things easy with her one step at a time, because I needed to know more about her not just her beauty and her charming look that could make a man fall so easily, *so took control of the wheel* and made the decision to develop more knowledge and acquaintance with each other before we can take it to the next level, we started chatting, calling and all that.
She was living and having her business done in a different city while I was in another city running my own affairs, because she liked what she saw in me, my looks and all that, she started throwing more advances in form of gifts which I really appreciated and I returned the favour as well.
At the time I met her online, lover's day celebration was around the corner and because we were getting to know each other, we couldn't make arrangements for meeting, I sent her messages and gift, and she asked for me account details and sent me some money to get gift for myself reason that she does not know how to get gift for people, so she told me if I can't get gift maybe I should take myself out with my cousin instead of being in the house that evening.
We were actually having cool time with each other chatting and discussing with each other on phone on the platform of friendship, all the money she sent and assistance I got from her during the moment we were having good times, she sounded it to my hearing as a note of warning that she is not giving me any of these things for her to bribe me to fall in love with her, all that she did was to give generously to a friend that has been making her happy on phone, advising and encouraging her to be a better person.
As the day goes by, she decided to invite me to come to her city to meet with her, her reason being that she does not have time due to her tight schedule in her business to come and see me, instead I should come , I declined the offer reason being that I was actually not financially stable, and couldn't foot my bills to meet with her, so she offered to assist me in other for me to come and see her, after persuasion from her I decided to oblige and travelled to meet her, I stayed in a hotel room with her for two days and during that period I didn't touch or had sex with her and I left back to my base.
She didn't feel happy about it and after a while I couldn't find myself to go ahead to fall in love with her. There everything became messy.
She got heartbroken and started calling me names, she said I was wicked and that I deceived her into falling in love with me and making her spend some money on me. I was so confused and couldn't comprehend why she could say all that to me, I didnt ask her for all the financial gift she sent to me, she did that out of her own will and good heart, why feeling that I made her do all that she did during the time things were going fine between us?
Right now, I don't really know what to do or say about the whole thing? I am so confused and lost in thought as to why she will be saying all these things to me.
The question I have been asking myself ever since this happened, ***does it mean that her generosity was based on what she is hoping to get from me or was it a honeybee and it's stings?***
***Let me stop here for now, thanks for reading. Rafd******9828***
I came so close.
Nothing in life can be said to have a definite ending except death. You may try different opportunities in life to change your present conditions and situations, be it finance, emotions, relationship, health, etc and when you do your possible best to achieve that desirable consolation in life you end up halfway or even unsuccessful.
Yes it happens and it's not out of line in life experience of a man. When such occurs, it will warrant you to start feeling dejected and miserable about life. The situation of life may turn you upside down and kick you in the head to a level that you begin to wonder where you went wrong or if you did offend your ancestors or even your fellow neighbor sitting next to you. You see new ideas and try your best to develop your skills in that area of life, and after all your energy been put together to achieve a set goal, you eventually end up disappointed.
Nothing seem to be working out for you and all that, you isolate yourself from people and try to reason why things are not going well with you, and after several soul searching and all that, you still don't get the answer to your questions and thoughts.
You decide to try another method to see if you can get a different result, and still nothing seem to work out for you. Because of that you feel so confused and very mad at yourself and at everything that comes around you at that particular moment. I do really know that you have been in that kind of situation before in life.
One way or another you may have come across such feelings and situations in your life and you get confused on what next to do. The sad feeling is so overwhelming and very uncontrollable if not taken serious.
I remembered one incident that happened on one for the days I was pursuing a contract in one of the private brewery companies in Nigeria, we were five different fashion designers seeking for an opportunity to win a contract of making a brand product cloth for all the company staff and for some of their respected and valued customers, I did my best and made all the necessary effort within my power to gain myself that opportunity of my name being shortlisted as one for the potential fashion designers for the contract, after the first stage was concluded, five of us emerged and were sent to the second stage where I came out with two other fashion designers on the list as candidates that passed the second stage, then the final stage came and I was so sure that I was going to get the contract because I believed in myself that I passed all the questions and tests that were thrown at me with the rest of the other contenders, Infact from the reactions of the supervisors that were attached to us, I had this believe and conviction that I have gotten the contract already due to my outstanding performance during the test period.
I was shocked to hear the overall supervisor call the name of the candidate that had the lowest score as the winner of the test that was conducted and he won the contract, I couldn't hold myself but to feel disappointed and frustrated.
How they managed to calculate the result and gave him the contract was so confusing and surprising to me and to the rest of us that came for the contract. You could imagine that kind of feeling and situation where you knew that you have reached your crown and suddenly it's taken away from you. A very devastating experience and situation, ***I came so close*** to winning but I couldn't take the consolation dues to unforseen circumstance and situation.
I left the environment so sad and disappointed, but I told myself that it was not the end of my life, rather a step ahead in finding and rediscovering my abilities and potentials with greater opportunities to embrace. Although I came so close to winning my battles but couldn't, it does not mean I have to stop trying my best to pursue greatness and new opportunities in life.
***Often times when we hit our foot on the stone while walking, we try to dwell on the pain rather on the purpose while we made the journey in the first place***. We forget to stick and focus our minds on that course we have made up our mind to achieve when we decided to leave our houses in the morning, we forget the plans we made in our hearts to achieve success no matter the challenges that may occur.
That you tried to achieve a certain goal and fail on the way is not the end of it, my dear it does not mean you are a failure or it's the end of the road for you, rather it is the beginning of your success story if you decide to take yourself up immediately and face your challenges and fears at once.
Please know this today; ***"I came so close is not success, rather I made it at last is the word of success, so go for it."***
Thank you for reading. ***Rafd******9828***.
Seeing is believing.
I came across this statement in one of the documents I read last night and it got me thinking aloud about how we take care of our eyes and body.
You may be wondering why I decided to talk about our eyes and the care we give to it. You will agree with me that the first power of control we human possess in our human body is our eyes, and this important organ of our body is the source that gives us light and direction to achieve anything we want in life.
Remove the eyes and you will see how difficult and very challenging life will be to us all. So therefore it's important to highlight the needs to give proper attention to our eyes every minute of our days in order to live and function adequately.
From the caption of this article you will agree with me that what makes our life meaningful and productive is the fact that we make use of our eyes to see what our hands and legs can not reach, most times our brains function on the information our eyes send across to it and that's why you can believe what someone is telling you about a particular thing, reason being that you can see whatever he or she is trying to show you.
The eyes we have in our body system is a special gift to mankind that creates opportunity for one to achieve everything he or she desires in life, in other words, the eyes we all have both in humans and other animals is the object that makes every living thing have a complete life experience around their environment.
One may ask this question;
***"How did our creator design this special gift in man called the eyes?"***
Of a truth, it is not in our domain as humans to ask how this special gift came about in humans and other animals, even as scientists have made several researches on how the eyes was designed and created, yet no one has ever been able to fix the puzzle, get the origin and the design of the eyes both in man and other animals, and this has really made man wonder and ponder in deep thought how God made this special gift in man and other animals.
Since we can not understand or have the knowledge of how God designed and created the eyes in man, it's so important that we put effort in making sure that we take good care of our eyes so that we can have good sight vision with our eyes even in our old age.
**HOW TO TAKE GOOD CARE OF OUR EYES**
During ***summer***, as we can’t put suncream on our eyes, the easiest way to protect them when the sun is beaming down is to wear sunglasses or a large hat. For those who require glasses to help with their vision, it is possible to get sunglasses that are also prescription.
During ***winter***, the air usually gets dry due to the lowered temperatures. This can cause a number of ocular issues, not least of which is drying out the eyes themselves. It is important to keep yourself hydrated by regularly drinking water.
***Other ways of taking good care of your eyes includes;***
***Eat a healthy, balanced diet:*** this is as important as you take your daily shower each time, giving your body the adequate and proper nutrition that will help your body system improve their function is a key to a healthy living and sight vision.
***Maintain a healthy weight:*** watching your weight and making sure you take the adequate food timely and avoid taking of junk foods that may trigger your weight size to add is also another way of having a good healthy life.
***Get regular exercise:*** having a regular exercise is very important to human body and it also increase efficiency sight vision in human.
***Avoid smoking:*** yes smoking they say it's very dangerous to health and can affect your sight vision as you constantly indulge in that act of smoking. To have a healthy sight vision, you need to avoid smoking of any kind.
***Know your family medical history:*** having the knowledge of your family medical history in time will actually help you to take good care of your eyes challenges and prevent it from getting worse. You can prevent them by taking adequate medications if you find the problem in time and seek for solutions.
Finally, if you can be able to know your other risk factors and find ways to solve them and prevent them, I assure you that you will surely live happily knowing that your eyes are safe and healthy for the rest of your life. You have to take good care of your eyes and don't joke about it because, ***"seeing is believing".***
***Have a great day, thanks Rafd9828***
The heart of failure.
Nothing in this life they say comes so easy. To find what ever you need in life, you must surely have to build your heart and mind to be strong enough to face the huddle that will surely arise on your way to challenge and put you off from your set goal.
Often time we always have this negative thinking when we want to try a new thing and follow a path in life, we first put in front that fear of the unknown and what may come on our way and these feelings before us sometimes usually weakens us and make us not to make a step forward to the journey of rediscovering our hidden potentials and our abilities.
These feelings sometimes also can make one stay at a place for a long period of time without making an effort to break that limitation holding them back from reaching out to their success end.
Most successful individual in our society today were faced with these feelings on their way to success, but what made them different from people that didn't succeed in life is their ability to know their fears and live above them irrespective of the forces their fears and challenges came with to drag them back.
From the story of Michael Faraday who Invented electric in the year 1821, during the period of his invention, he tried several times and failed several times yet he didn't give up on his research project until the final time when he got a breakthrough. This is exactly what most people you see today around you that made it in their different endeavours passed through before becoming successful in life.
You may think that everything one needed can be achieved so easily, but another thing you have not known in life is this, ***for every successful individual you see today, there was a time the person had fears and failures as he or she tried to set their path to success.***
You may be asking this question to yourself or someone else when you see someone who came out successfully in the same path you went through and couldn't make it as he or she did;
***"How did they survive all the demons that came by their way to success?"***
The answer to this question you asked my good friend is not far fetched from this topic ***"The heart of failure"***. To answer your question, why most people get successful in that path you went through and couldn't succeed is because ***they didn't allow their fears and failures to make decisions for them, rather they took decisions for their fears and failures to never give up on their set goal.***
***They made the decision to keep pushing regardless of what was facing them on the way.***
***They made decision to keep going forward no matter the type of situation that could affect their outcome.***
***They made decision to hang on a little more in that path to success rather than giving up so easily.***
***They had this decision and faith in their God and what they believe in that at the end of it all success must surely be their consolation no matter the time it will take.***
***They also made the decision to stay focused and keep thinking out new ways to achieve this great task and until they find positive result they were not going to relinquish their quest to achieving success.***
The decisions these successful individuals made on their way to success is so difficult for one to take, but if you really can have the ability and monster the courage to take such decisions in life, surely you will finally get the result you are looking for.
But you should never forget this one thing my dear friend, before you embark on any path, make sure you have a proper plan on how to achieve your dreams, a plan that will not endanger your own life all because you really want to make it by all means, always put your safety first into consideration before you step forward to achieving your dreams.
***Remember, reckless mind and decisions does not achieve success rather they end up in failure, but strong and well coordinated mind and decisions surely end up with success story at the end of it all.***
Take a decision today to have a heart of **SUCCESS** or to have a heart of **FAILURE**. The choice is yours to make.
**Have a great day. Rafd****9828** **loves you!**
This thing called frustration.
Have you been in a situation in life where all you have tried your hands on to achieve ends up not coming your way? It's really so painful and heartbreaking when all your energy you put together to achieve a success turns out to be in vain and waste.The feeling is so indescribable and so confusing my dear friend.
***Please forgive my manner alright, I am so sorry that it's been a while I came online to write and read other people's works and also drop my comment. The condition I have found myself it's actually one of the reasons I have not been able to come online, but thank God for this great opportunity I have received once again to come online to communicate, write and also read my fellow writer's articles. You guys are absolutely doing great with what your are doing here.***
Truth be told, these past months have not been so pleasing to me, of late I have been facing lots of challenges and set backs, ranging from ill health conditions, work related issues, personal problems and other challenges which I may not want to share with you here. So it has been a hectic period for me for some time now.
When I talk about frustration in human life, it's something many of us if not everyone of us have experienced in life either from personal based related cases, relationships with one another or even from the turn out of events in our individual daily life experiences and activities. The feelings that turns up from frustration can make one think or even do certain things they may not be in control of or even regret later if allowed to overwhelm them in the negative way. Just imagine a situation where you were expecting to win a particular contract or achieve a particular set goal and along the line something went wrong and all your plans dashed away, the feeling one gets afterwords can make one develop emotional trauma or physically and psychologically damaged to the level where he or she can not imagine.
It does not end there, this may even extend to your peace and harmony you ones had around you and with your neighborhood, friends and even families, causing you to have problems in your relationships and even in your marriages. This thing called frustration can be underestimated to be a simple spelled word freely used by people but it's effect is overwhelming. Frustration can make one lose his or her mind and that may result to hurting or injuring oneself or others in the process.
I have seen and heard stories how frustration made people commit murder, suicide and other criminal offenses without knowing how it all happened. I have also seen a situation where because of frustration one's beautiful relationship and marriage destroyed with no chance of amending and reconciling with each other again. I have also seen where frustration made someone not to think and reason straight instead the person starts acting weird and stuff like that.
This thing called Frustration can take one's mind who finds himself or herself inside it into depression, mental disorder and mental disorientation. Some of the persons we meet mad on the streets and in the mental health centres today maybe because of such situation.
But I will not also forget to share with you the other side of frustration, what it can also do to people who tend to understand the feeling when it comes and channel it into positive result. Yes, some how the feeling of frustration can also make one to retreat and retrace his or her steps back in other to get it more better. As this may sound funny to some of you reading this article right now, but there is an atom of truth in what I am trying to explain.
In a situation where you have tried so many things and it didn't work out well for you and before you could understand what was going on frustration and it's effect sets in, but if you are in control of your emotions and thought, you will surely see that feeling of frustration as a stepping stone to achieving a better result in Subsequent days to come, you may not like the feeling it comes with but surely you will like the result you will get if you give deaf ear to the negative effect of frustration and channel your energy to the positive side of it.
So I ask you my dear friends reading my article, how do you handle the effect of this thing called Frustration? Please be the judge of yourself.
***Thanks and have a great day! Rafd9828***
Listen! Even that little things matter.
I was listening to one of my friend's discussion the other day in a restaurant where we went to have some food and drink, he was complaining about how the woman he thought was in love with him just woke up one morning to break the news that she was breaking up with him, at first he was thinking it was all a joke when the incident happened, but after a while, he began to see the seriousness in her as she packed her belongings and left his house that very faithful morning.
He didn't expect such blow on him considering the fact that they never had any serious misunderstanding and quarrel he could ever remember that would warrant her to break such news to him and left without waiting for them to sort things out.
I couldn't understand what was going on in their relationship and what he was trying to explain, because the last time I was with my friend and his girlfriend I didn't notice any problem or issues of any kind between them, Infact they two were the envious of all as they flaunt their romance every second without considering who is at the corner watching them for the moments I have seen them together. So what could have been the problem for her to wake up one morning to say that she wants to break up with my friend?.
This was the question that was going through my head as I continued to listen to him. After he finished his story, out of curiosity I asked him if he has confronted her to actually know what was her reasons for taking such step, he responded to me by saying that he couldn't withstand the emotional trauma and the blow the news gave to him so he left the house without getting to discuss with her or even tried to stop her as she left the house.
When I went home that day, I started to ponder on their case and what could have led to that sudden breakup and all that. To help myself get to the answer I was looking for, I came across a particular information about the reasons why people fall out of love in their relationships that struck my mind to write this to you this wonderful morning.
***Listen my dear friend, why alot of people you see happy in their relationship today, the next morning they fall out of love with their spouses without notice is because there are certain things they feel it's not important to checkmate and act upon them during their relationship experiences which may be eating up their love foundation without them noticing and eventually when that destructive worm finally gets to the last pillar of the foundation to eat it up to the level where the relationship can not hold together again, then the emotional feelings and affection that was found the relationship gets destroyed overnight without notice.***
***What am I saying? Most couples have failed to put more keen interest and attention to little things that happen in their relationship, for instance, your partner may be complaining about the way you try to show her excessive attentions and care towards everything that concerns her which she may misinterpret to being over possessiveness to her, because to her she feels that you don't allow her to take care of herself or do things the way she feels like doing at times, but to you that is showing the concern you may not actually pay attention to that which she is complaining about, instead of you to try understanding her complain and make some adjustments, rather you go ahead to keep doing what you were doing believing you are doing her a great deal and being caring and all that, and when this continues to go on in the relationship, it gradually turns your spouse off and makes him/her to wake up one morning to tell you honey, I am done with you and the relationship.***
As difficult as it may sound to you to believe, my dear this is one of the thousand reasons that could bring sudden breakup in a relationship which most of us may be facing today including my friend.
Listen!, You don't need to be carried away by the way you feel about your partner that you end up indirectly take possession and control of all your spouse's lifestyle that he/she will start to feel different about you and everything you are doing towards him/her, start to see your kindness, care and show of love towards him/her as being controlling and possibly being to possessing and domineering.
Learn to always give room to ask your spouse questions if he or she likes the way you are treating him/her, constant appraisal is necessary in a relationship to actually find your partner's point of view and feelings towards you and your treats to them.
Don't always assume and presume you know what he/she likes, dislikes and what he/she wants at any given time, give your spouse that room to make their own choice and decisions, then learn to surprise them from time to time with your own choice of gifts and stuffs like that. It's so healthy to give room for choices and decisions to be made by your partners on their own. Remember that you too are in a partnership of relationship which requires that you give your spouse that chance to express their own power of choices and decisions.
***I apologize for not being active so far, I am seriously having issues with my gadgets and I am trying to put things in order. Please I will do my best to get things right and back on my feet.***
***Thanks for reading my article 🙏.Rafd******9828***
Do I need help?
Certainly this question "***Do I need help?"*** indirectly passes through our minds when we try so much to get something that seem so difficult to achieve in our different lives. When we toil day and night, thinking so deep on our efforts in trying to solve our challenges to a certain level of expectations for a favourable result and at the end of the whole day we end up not getting what we were looking for.
In some cases, you may try to believe and have faith that no matter how difficult the road may be as you try to achieve your dreams, that surely you will get through with it in success and when all these hopes and expectations are so on the high spirit, before the end of the whole day you get to find out that you are still where you are and nothing has changed. You may begin to wonder what could be the problem, you may even start having suspicion on everything around you if they are your reason for not getting what you were looking for it something else.
And the funniest of it all is that you will begin to cross examine your self and your strategies if actually you were doing the necessary things you supposed to have done or not that could hinder you from achieving your dreams and plans. I don't know if you have one way or the other found yourself in such a situation before in your different world of experience?
It's really so confusing and disheartening when you find yourself in such situation. If care is not taken when you find yourself in such situation, it may shift your mindset and your zeal from that which you believe is the right way of life and turn you into having less faith, doubted hope and trust in your abilities and other needed spirit to make great difference in life.
A young lady who happened to have found someone she truly love, and after some time decided to give room for the relationship to move to the next level which was marriage and settling down with her spouse. As the day goes by, she started noticing certain weird situations happening around her and she tried to find out what was the problem, she did all she could to find the answers to the recent allen situation she was experiencing, low and behold she could not get any answer to that, she tried all she was able to do in order to solve the challenges she was passing through and yet she was not able to find answers to her problems.
She started asking herself this one question that most of us usually ask ourselves when we feel confused, stocked at a place, when we are static and does not know which way to follow again in life as situations and challenges hit us badly. ***"Do I Need Help?"***
The answer to that question is on you to give it to yourself, and yes if you are able to gather the courage to ask yourself this question when your situation are so hitting on you, know it then that your closer to getting a solution to your challenges.
Like that lady who happened to notice that she has actually getting out of control of the situation around her and decided to ask this question about herself, it's also important that you take a proper watch about yourself and understand if you are actually getting what you are seeking for or not so that if you are not getting there, you can quickly seek for help so that you don't end up lossing that which is so dear to you.
One thing you need to understand also in life is this, life is not easy and should not be overlooked or taken for granted when you see yourself not meeting up with what you supposed to meet up with or achieve, it's always good to ask questions and try to find solutions to your problems when they come facing you.
Seeking for help when you notice that things are not moving accordingly is a noble step one should not feel ashamed about, because if you keep pretending that everything is alright with you and keep living with it, one day that challenges will eventually swallow you up and regret will become your companion.
Learn today to know when it's time to ask yourself that question that will bring you a positive change in that situation you have found yourself into.
***Have a beautiful and lovely day today. Rafd9828***
The heart of giving the world needs.
"***We rise by helping others. If you're in a position to help just do it. It won't cause you anything".***
I will like to start my article with this word in my first paragraph to pass this amazing message to you today.
I know most of you have been feeling so entitled by the way you give to people and feel it's your right to receive and command respect from people you show hand of fellowship and assistance. Some also have seen it as a major way of getting people's attention to instill fear in them and for them to treat them the way they feel like without questions.
I have been wondering why most people feel that way when they render assistance to people they find better off.
***Must you use your chance of assisting people that you are better off to showcase your superiority over them?***
***Do you feel that the reason you actually give to people you are better off is because you are able to make the fortune by your own making instead of God?***
I feel this is the time we all should try our best to understand the meaning of giving and the importance of giving most especially to those you are better off and also to those that you feel are better than you. Yes, to give does not only stop at the doors of the people you are better off, you can extend further to the doors of people that are better than you.
No matter the type of people you may encounter in life, the ability to give should not be seen on the bases of you being at the better side more than the receiver, rather it's should be based on the individual who is doing the giving. In otherwords, when you want to give, do not look at the person you are giving to or the receiver, rather you should be looking at your heart at which you are offering the arms giving and arms of fellowship. This is very important to note because some people in life who give thinking that they are actually doing a great deal of help and assistance ends up not receiving the blessings that may come to them as a result of their action just because of the nature of their heart intentions while offering the assistance.
What most people have failed to understand is this, when giving with a good heart, you may not want to put your mind towards the attitude and character the person you are giving is portraying even after giving to the person, all you are after is the good feelings you have in you, the joy that comes after giving to someone whether you are better than the person or not, all that borders you is to make sure you do a good deed to that person that is seeking your assistance, or to that person you feel like to give something to.
What the world need today is not the type of giving that will be tagged with something in return, rather it's a type of giving that will surely make your neighbor to see through you that unconditional love, support and togetherness as people who have the same goal and aspirations in life.
The world today need your true sense of humour and love, that type of giving that will be devour of rancour, racism, tribalism, ethnicity differences and many other anti social attitudes we see today in our worlds.
When you give, take it that you are giving yourself that opportunity to make a positive difference In that person's life. Don't feel you are just doing a favour to that person through your arms giving and assistance.
When you give always see it as an opportunity and your personal responsibility you owe to your maker for giving you that opportunity to be at a better position where you can be able to give to others.
Finally when you give to people, see it in your heart as an opportunity that you are truly lifting others who may have lost hope and trust in their very existence and in their creator. If you see giving in this light of truth and try your best to follow this path, surely you are one of the people who will surely receive that reward that comes from God who blesses people who do his words that says ***"Blessed is the hands that gives than the one that takes".***
***Thank you so much for coming by to read my article 🙏 Rafd9828***
Her weird character that took me off my feet.
If you have a woman around you, a girlfriend or a wife and you have never thought about watching her so closely to understand her very well, to know her more as you two stay in marriage relationship or friendship zone together and you claim to know her that very much, and you can hit your chest to say you have known her too well to say something or write something about her, my dear friend think twice and relax because you are yet to know more about her.
Although they say that human beings are so complex and unpredictable in their nature, it's also important that you know this today that the most challenging time and period you need to pray to God to help you overcome is that moment you have someone in your life as partner, be it man or woman.
The time it will take you to truly understand and learn your partner may take longer time if not ages for you to say that you have crossed and covered a better percentage of score marks in learning your partner.
***I want to apologize if this that I am about to say may sound awkward and weird to you or make you feel that I am personalising it to a certain gender. Please the idea is solely for the purpose of teaching and learning and not for gender attack or abuse. Once again I apologize to you if you find this article gender deformation.***
I have come to understand that in my many years of experience as a person who had one way or the other had different encounters and experiences with women in my life starting from the time I was growing up till this moment I am about to settle down in marriage, I can tell you that I am yet to fully understand the character of women and how they see things at each moment of their days.
As funny as it may sound but it's the truth, you will agree with me that women are so unique in their nature and in the way they do things at their different stages differently and personally, but I tell you that there are characters they will exhibit towards you, you will begin to wonder and get confused at the middle of the road with them, you will so be stranded on the way that you may not know how to take the next step as you are pinned at a place because of the sudden character she will display to you.
In one of my recent experiences I had with the love of my life, I had one experience that got me mesmerized and speechless yesterday that I didn't know about or seen ever since I started existing as a human on earth from any woman but from her.
We went out on a friend's birthday celebration, she requested that I take all the food they brought to us as guest, I pleaded with her to atleast drink the yoghurt that was served to her and after a long period of pleading for her to take the drink, she finally accepted and requested that I opened the drink for her to take, as lovers normally do, I took a little sip and gave her the yoghurt to drink as she usually do to me, she refused taking the drink from me and said she does not want to drink again, I asked why she refused to take the yoghurt from me, she didn't give me any answer, for more than 30minutes I was begging her to take the yoghurt she refused, I offered to buy a new one for her to take but she refused also, rather she said that I should finish the yoghurt so we can leave, I apologized to her severally if her reason for refusing to take the yoghurt was because I sipped her drink before giving it to her, she didn't answer me.
So I stayed back on my sit and did as she asked me by drinking the yoghurt the much I can and after that we left, reaching to her place, she left me without saying goodbye and went inside her house, when I got home I received a shocking message in my phone how I was mean and how I was so selfish to eat and drink and never cared if she ate or not at the birthday party.
I was totally confused and didn't know what to say up till this moment, I have tried to actually understand the whole situation and why all these are happening and till this moment I am still confused. Even as I got the message from her, I still apologized to her, if there was any thing I did that could make her feel offended that I am so sorry about them, yet she didn't want to drop the whole issue.
Now my question is, ***what she is claiming that I did to her, is it entirely my fault?***
I have asked myself countless times where I went wrong and up till this time I can't place my hands on any thing, I tried making sure that she was fine at the occasion, I was totally showing care and concern towards her and never had any issue with her prior to our visit to the occasion, I tried to listen to her and do as she requested me to, I tried to know her reason for not eating and all that and she said she was not feeling to eat anything, which she later asked me to open the yoghurt for her to take and after I opened it everything changed.
That's why I said that there are hidden characters in women you are yet to see and this is also applicable to men but mine was displayed to me by my special one, you may be thinking you are doing the right to your partner, you may not know that she is not happy with what you are doing, I don't know if that was my case with her yesterday.
My love is a good woman and very sweet angel with a heart full of love and care, but whatever be her reason for doing what she did yesterday is what I am still confused about.
I love her very much and will surely keep doing what ever I can to understand her more and continue to learn and grow in love with her so we two can reach that level of perfection we all hope for in our relationships.
At least I have learnt a new character from her so next time I will do my best to watch it. My advice; ***Try never to let your spouse's attitude change your feelings and love for each other and always build your heart for the unseen attitude to be seen in your relationship.***
***Thanks for coming by to read my article.🙏 Rafd9828***
@Rafd9828
