This is my hallucination and I can’t control it

In this world, there are many uncertain things will happen and we cannot predict those. In my opinion, to like and to love someone is one of the best possible things to happen to any of us. How could we deny the fact that our heart is seeking and reaching someone’s heart too? Can you get it when you fall harder and harder, then there’s no way for you to control those emotions that is running wild inside of you?

In this blog, I want to say things about what exactly I am feeling about to this particular person. I admit that the harder you fall, the tougher it would be to move on. But I think this is not the case for me. I believe that the harder you fall, the easier it would be to move on because you love someone without regrets. Yes, it was unfortunate to love but failed and lost. On the other hand, I am trying to look the beauty of love that I have offered to that person.

Am I attracted to this person?

You know what folks, I have been asking myself lately about if I like, love or attracted to this person because I know there is something in my heart that is unrest. It is a foreign feeling that I know shouldn’t be in my heart. You might think that it is quite confusing right? Let me tell you in details. When you like someone, what is the first feeling or symptoms or signs that you actually like this person? Is it the uneasiness of your heart? The giggle and happiness whenever you see this person? Or the sense of knowing and thinking to be with that person every day?

Okay is it sound confusing? Do you get my point? I am trying to put into words the feeling I have now because if I cannot write it, I don’t think I cannot survive in the day thinking of this person for the whole day. I think I am attracted to this person because it has been weeks since I am wanting to talk with this person. It was just that I am afraid of calling and hearing this person’s voice. I am a little bit excited and sad typing this because I know this person might not read my blog.

Do I like this person?

Can I ask about the difference between liked and attracted? Because I found myself in the middle of these words. Some part of me say that I like this person because of what I saw and felt. On the contrary, some part of me say that I am attracted to this person because it has been years since my heart pumps for someone else. My whole sight is very blurry because I cannot find the right answer for it. So, I shall seek advice to you all.

Like what I what said, it has been years since this cold, contained, and picky heart of mine beats for someone else. I didn’t choose this person in the first place. But my heart is telling me to pursue this person albeit the risk of it. Thus, my mind is telling me to stop liking person because it is not the right time and I am not sure if I can fight for my love. Perhaps, this whole thing is just my hallucination and it will pass by in time. But as a man of no regrets, I want to test the water whether I failed, lost, and unloved.

I don’t know if you are reading this or not. But I just want to tell you that I am becoming crazy for you, like my mind is thinking of you every day. I want to stop myself from doing so, however you are the light of my dark dreams. A star that keeps shining wherever box or container I put you in my head. Sorry folks, I just want to let it out and just be real for several minutes of your time. Should I put the beliefs of society over my very own happiness?

This article was actually written from the past days. I haven't had a chance to write in read cash because I am quite busy taking care of my rabbits. My mother doe just gave birth and she was denying her babies. Denying? I mean is she didn't breastfeeding the kits. So what I did was force feeding. I am breastfeeding the kits four times a day.

I wrote an article in Hive and exploring the Hive editor. Their editor is quite unique because you can do HTML coding with basic syntax. I am actually familiar with all of it so I don't have a hard time grasping the editor, but the problem is how to transform my blog into a good visual. That's the challenge for me now.

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My previous articles you might love to read:

• Do you value the correct spelling?

• We are the generation of pure anxiety

• Finally, I made it to Hive community

Thank you fore reading. I'll see you next time!