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Confessions Of A Former Drug User (The Escape) Good evening all. Yesterday, I shared how my husband entered into the world of drug addiction when he was a little younger. Today, I am going to share the last part of his drug addiction diaries and how he was able to escape from it. And I quote: ***A Suicide Brings Me Back To Drugs*** *"In 2004, someone close to me committed suicide. My world flipped upside down, I felt the worst guilt I have ever felt and gone on a severely strong path of self-destruction and punishment. At the time I was a taxi driver and selling anything you could ask for out of my cab* ***(in Las Vegas this is not at all uncommon).*** *Well, I started doing what I was selling - Meth and cocaine, and drinking became my new security blankets. I got off work every night and went to the casino and played blackjack. I would drink about 20 Jack Daniels and Cokes a night to distract me from thinking of my friend's death. If I went home to sleep, I was having nightmares similar to the movie* ***"The Butterfly Effect"*** *where I kept trying to go back and save my friend and kept failing.* *This is why the meth and coke came in. I will come home fall on my face and have to be awake again in an hour. I would shower, brush my teeth and at this time now was smoking the meth, because the visible effects were less, you weren't as twitchy and you sweat a lot less.* *I managed to finally stop doing it and came to terms with the past. I later started working as a car salesman, great more druggies around me, and before you knew it, I was doing coke at work. It put a lot more hype into your sales pitch. Again, it did not last and I stopped doing it."* ***Relationship Issues, Low Self Worth, Feeling Defeated*** *"My Old Friend Meth Visited Me Once Again - I got into another relationship. It was hmm soo soo and unhealthy we will say. So much drama and head games and in the mix. And we started doing meth together. I got pretty deep into it, why? Because it blocked out the emotions I was feeling of helplessness in my relationship. It basically numbed me by making my head race so fast, and I didn't have time to feel. I wanted to stop, but it was too hard because she always had some on her, and she would do it in front of me. I would even ask her to not bring it, but she would anyway and then offer it to me. I was always weak and accepted."* *No Longer A Prisoner* *"Finally, something great happened. She left town for a month. I cleaned up and when she returned, I refused to see her, and that ended her... and the meth? I am happy to say I have been drug-free ever since.* ***I will end this with one phrase that everyone has heard:*** ***"Say no to drugs"*** *If you start using the word "NO" becomes very very hard to say.* *I am not proud of this, but I did learn from it. I replaced drugs with my wife, she is my drug now. That may seem odd, but for a bipolar, ADHD person with PTSD, well, she is my savior. Tonight we had talked about my drinking. I will not go into details but, I have my demons and that excuses NOTHING. This is today, and I have goals as well as responsibilities that are hard to reach here. I have my moments where I wish to God, my past can help me focus. I do not like feeling like I am failing my family and that is a HUGE issue for me.*

***This is the most embarrassing part of my life, but it is the one part of my life where I may be able to help someone else. I do not regret what I have done because in some strange way I may be able to help someone else.*** *As an adult if not treated it gets immensely worse, so does your psyche, now add to that drug? You are looking at one hot mess. The fact that I breathe today is a complete miracle, people can blast God all they want, but I don't.* *I am alive for a reason. It may not be about me, I really think I am alive for others. I am a crazy-ass left field, off the hook today and tomorrow may be a different kinda guy. One thing you will always know- I will be real. That is it. Am I special? HELL NO! Just well networked and everything everyone goes through! Been there, done that! I will use my past to try and help you. I will never walk away from that which I feel is a personal responsibility."*

***"I just want to be a good person to make up for all the times in my life where I wasn't."***

That ends my husband's drug confessions. Thank you all for reading. It's almost 7 pm here and I'm going to go eat dinner now. A super typhoon just landed here in Northern Luzon, so I'll better hurry and I'll get back in a few. I hope everyone is having a manageable Friday. One love @Bloghound **#Bloghound** **#Bloghoundism** https://read.cash/search?q=%23Bloghound https://read.cash/search?q=%23Bloghoundism `and I am a member of #ClubBrokeBCH` September 10, 2021 07: 02 pm Philippines (The photos are my own and taken by me) **Copyright @Bloghound 2021. All Rights Reserved.** https://read.cash/@Bloghound/peculiar-piano-the-curse-e00813c3#copyright-at-bloghound-2021-all-rights-reserved `To my wonderful and amazing daily readers and my generous sponsors (old and new), THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH!`

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