@tired_momma
edited
A Mother's Story
This article is inspired by Mom's Group that I'm part of. One of the moms shared this post from her Facebook Newsfeed.
Let me translate it for you. (I use "he" for the child's unknown gender.) I strangle my 3-year-old child because he didn't want to sleep. My 1-year-old wake up and made me furious so I smothered my 3-year-old with a pillow on his face. If you're going to tell me, I'm insane, YES!! Yes, I'm insane! My life is crazy. Being a mother making me crazy! I almost killed my child! WHY? Because I'm a full-time Mom, 24/7, no day-off, then this short time at night before we sleep I was hoping that my husband will be here to give me a hand, BUT NO! He will prioritize hanging out and will be home as he wishes when he's sleepy! I told him to give me a break-even just one rest day to help me look after our children but he didn't bother! No mother will get tired, yes! But I'm overtired! In our three years of marriage, The only time he told me he loves me is when I was just his girlfriend and to our first baby. He used to hug me before he go. Everything doesn't work for me now! You can be mad at me, this would be my last post while I still have a part of my sanity. I will soon delete my Facebook because I no longer want to live in this world!!! That is very sad. I'm heartbroken. **Did you feel the pain? Can you blame her for her action and feeling that way?** I'm not saying that strangling and suffocating your child is okay when you're getting tired as a Mom. But what she's going through, I feel her. I am exhausted just by hearing her out. She's helpless. She must be experiencing Postpartum Depression and she needs help. But the help that is supposedly in the form of a responsible husband is neglecting. She felt alone. It's different if you're a single Mom and you know that you don't have anyone to lean on but yourself. But she got a husband. So the pain of her husband letting her down making her feel alone in this responsibility is too much for her to bear. *When Tia was born after few months she was constantly crying all night. At that time I was working full-time and my husband is the one left in the house looking after her. When I come back home from work, my husband already cooks our food so we just have to eat together. At night, if Tia starts crying even after breastfeeding, my husband will tell me to get some sleep and he will look after her. But during weekends, I gave him a break, we go out, I take him to bars or I let him out with friends. I have a husband and he got a wife, we do it as a couple.* *Lu*cky? I'm taking that as I'm blessed for having a responsible man. I have another story but this time I get lucky. And I'm thankful. And that's what we need! That's what you have to look for. If you have a partner now and you are not sure if he will treat you the same when you get married, ask yourself again. Because you might lose your sanity. Being a mother, breastfeeding, cleaning, cooking, washing clothes, dealing with the children when they are crying. And if you have more than one just like her? A 1-year-old and a 3-year-old? And you are doing everything alone? And you have a non-existent, useless husband, are you not going to lose your mind? But women, mothers, you and I we are strong. We make the impossible possible. For our children, we can do anything. We can live without a man but not without our children. Whoever she is, if I were her I will reclaim my crown. If he doesn't want to be the father of my child then I will stand alone. You cannot underestimate the power of a mother. I wish that she can put herself together for the sake of her children. If the husband doesn't want to act like a husband, she has the choice to leave and change her life with her kids. She will make it. Coz she's a woman and a mother. If you are a man and you are reading this. Please have some balls. And if you don't have one, please leave the girls alone! If you are not ready to be a father and you will not be a responsible one, then put a condom on! And please treat your wife with the same treatment, with the same sweetness, with the same love you showered to her when you were courting her. Don't you change if not for the better. She fell in love and trust your love because of how you make her feel when you're just boyfriend and girlfriend. And don't forget the vow you made. Don't abandon your wife and make her feel alone. If you are a single woman and childless and reading this, PLEASE know your man well. And please be prepared and be it known to you that when you get pregnant, it is a big responsibility. What you were able to do when you were single, most of it, you will not be able to do when you have kids. If you are not prepared for family life, protect yourself. Being a mother and having kids is wonderful. But it is a big responsibility. And it's not easy. But if you found a man that will be your other half and he is responsible, being a mother is the best thing in the world. Be wise. TO ALL THE MOTHERS, YOU ARE AWESOME. YOU ARE WONDERFUL. YOU ARE AMAZING. YOU ARE BRAVE. YOU WORK HARD! YOU ARE A SUPERWOMAN. THANK YOU FOR BEING GREAT! THANK YOU FOR NOT GIVING UP. THANK YOURSELF AND APPRECIATE YOURSELF FOR EVERYTHING THAT YOU DO! TO ALL THE FATHERS, THANK YOU FOR BEING THERE WITH YOUR WIFE. THANK YOU FOR BEING RESPONSIBLE. THANK YOU FOR NOT LETTING HER DO EVERYTHING ALONE. THANK YOU FOR THE LOVE THAT NEVER CHANGE. THANK YOU FOR THE HELP WHEN SHE NEEDED IT. THANK YOU FOR YOUR PRESENCE. YOU ARE APPRECIATED. YOU ARE THE MAN! YOU ARE AWESOME! **To that mother, let's pray for her. I pray that someone helps her. I pray that she seek help and she will receive help. I pray that the husband will see his wife's suffering and changed and be the husband he should be. I pray for those innocent children. I pray for them to be a great family again. I pray that it's not too late for that.** Please share your thoughts and your experiences. Thank you for reading. `Lead Image from unsplash.com`
91 comments
Hmmm, why isnt he helping her I mean its not her children but their children? Why some husbands so lazy to take care of their own kids😢
And the wife has to suffer and do everything. It's tiring. Being alone with two kids is tiring. Doing everything alone in the house is tiring. Even I will lose my sound mind.
Yeah I mean u didnt marry her to be a slave but an equal, we all have mothers so why treat other wives badly
This is really so emotional, why would a man leave the home chore and kids care to the wife alone? It is insane, I feel her pain just from the post. I think people should reach out to her because she sound really tired. Caring for children can be very exhausting and it takes both parents to do so.
I feel her pain too. It's just heartbreaking and I feel sorry for her. And I just want to pinch her husband's balls! 😤
Pinch his balls? That's 🤣🤣
Don't worry not just with a bare finger.
How do you intend to do it?
Getting married and being a parent is losing your freedom. Both increase your responsibilities to others. The child is a joint production and all his needs should be met by both the mother and the father. Marriages made without being aware of these, especially being a parent without being ready, can end in disaster.
And that mother was left with the responsibility that she should be sharing with the husband. How can he do that?
so sorry for her.. I know how tiring it is, I only have one baby and I have never been tired n my whole life.. but I remember how my husband had been there for me all the time. sacrificing work time and sleep to take care of our baby and to give me time to sleep too.. so it is indeed important to know the man who'll be the father of our children well, it is important that he is a father material and not just a boyfriend material. I hope the kids are safe. the mom might hurt them... its scary, she is obviously depressed and needs help.
We can only pray for her and those innocent children to be spared. That's really scary. She indeed needs help and I hope she gets it in time. She needs it now. Her husband is unbelievable. 😤
Postpartum Depression is real 😢 many people judge Mother's who's suffering such kind of depression. I sometimes admit I'm easy to get mad, I'm always shouting at my kids when I feel so depressed. I don't wanna hear any noise from them. It's really hard to control when depression attacks. 😔
I have my friends who are the same. And I know how hard it is Nheng. Thank you for sharing your story. How are you coping now?
..still the same , but good thing my kids already know what I don't like, so they manage to behave everytime they see that I'm in a "depression mode". 😊
❤❤❤
This is too emotional for me because I just posted my article on what I went through when I want to give birth so I can understand what she's going through So I pray that may God take absolute control over her, children and the so call husband I don't know why some men are so heartless
I haven't read that article but I thought of you when you say in your last article about being a mother. Amen.
It is not easy at all
I pity the mother. It really is not easy to be a full time mom. I've been a full time mom too for 2 years before I get back to work but I am blessed because God sent me a man who is responsible and very appreciative and supportive. I hope she gets a help that she needs this time. I want to hug her. What she has been through is never easy. It's never easy to be a Mother.
I'm hugging her in my mind. This really makes me emotional as I can feel her. I'm so sad for her. I just pray she gets help in time. And the husband can see her sufferings.
This article really makes me sad being a mother. 😪 Praying for her 🙏
Being a mother is unique. We are women, mothers, wives, friends, companions, toys, waitresses, workers and a myriad of things that only we can improve through our lives. If we are mothers we learn more things than mothers with partners. But being alone as a mother caring for your child is very traumatic. In the first weeks of life a great challenge begins.
You described us better Gertu ❤ Being alone, I know how it feels. Been like that for a long time but I have a family to count on. But I couldn't imagine being alone with no help. I will go crazy.
No girl, you wouldn't go crazy. You'd bring out more superpowers. That's how we moms are.
You are right! Mother. Sounds powerful already!
I feel the pain too even I am single. I pray her to become strong and okay. On the other thing I am glad that I have a father who was a responsible one. So my mom, me and my siblings are blessed to have him.
Flor tandaan mo, maghahanap ka ng mabuti at responsableng asawa ha.
Ang hirap 😭. Na feel ko ang hirap na nararanasan niya. Saludo talaga ako sa lahat ng ina sa buong mundo. Pero di ko mapigilan mapaiyak ng mabasa to 😭
At kawawa din matatakot ka para sa kapakanan ng dalawang bata. She needs help. Sana on time yung tulong na yun. Lets pray for her.
Kawawa naman siya sis sobrang physical at emotional drained na siya. Praying na maging ok siya. Napakaswerte na pag natagpuan mo na partner sa life ay understanding at responsable. Naaawa ako sa mga nanay na dumadanas ng ganitong sitwasyon.
Bago ako naging maswerte sinamang palad din ako as maling tao. Kaya nagpapasalamat ako na binigyan ako ni Lord ng mabuting asawa dahil kung ako lang lahat hindi ko kakayanin. Kahit walang asawa kung anjan pamilya ko okay lang. Pero kung wala lahat at ako lang di ko kakayanin. 😭
Ako din sis napaswerte ko sa pamilya ko sila kasama ko sa lahat ok din naman partner ko di niya pinababayaan mga kids namin
Naawa ako sa bata na walang kamuwang muwang at dahil sa depression ng isang ina,Sa pagod ay nagawa nitong saktan ang kanyang anak.Siguro wala nga sa tamang pag iisip at nagawa niya yon..Sana marealize ng nanay na yon na hindi siya nag-iisa.Kung napapagod siya sana naisip niyang humingi ng tulong sa itaas para malinawan ang kanyang pagiisip at hindi siya makagawa ng masama lalo na sa kanyang anak..Nakakapagod po talaga ang pagiging nanay dahil isa din po akong full time nanay..Pero kapag nagmamahal ka ay hindi mo mararamdaman ang pagod kahit pa sabihin nating irresponsible yong ama..May choice ka naman para ewan siya kung hindi na talaga gumagawa ng tama.O kaya kung kaya naman pag usapan ng mag asawa para maayos pa nila bakit di sana nila sinubukan...Hays hindi man natin alam ang totoong storya ng mag asawa..Nakakaawa parin talaga yong bata..Thank you po Ma'am tired-momma sa pag share po ng kwento na ito..Sana madaming mga nanay na tulad ko na sa kabila ng pagod ay maswerte pa din tayo kasi hindi tayo dumating sa point na kailangan ng manakit ng bata.
Salamat sa pagshare ng iyong point of view. Nagfocus ako sa nanay at tatay pero nakalimutan ko ang bata. Tama ka. May choice sya bilang babae, bilang ina, bilang tao. Kailangan nyang humingi ng tulong kung hindi na talaga kaya ng usap mag asawa. Kung naapektuhan ang mga bata dapat magisip manuti ang ina na baguhin ang kanyang buhay. Kaya nya itong malampasan para sa mga anak nya. Kailangan nyang kayanin kasi sya ay isang ina.
I really felt sorry for the lady and began to imagine i was married. I promise I wouldn't treat my wife that way, I'd always be there for her irrespective of how busy I am with work. I got really emotional while reading this.
Please be that man. That kind of husband, a real one. ❤
I'd try my best. You can also teach me to be that kind of person. Should we come to an agreement?
Everyone knows that the role of a mother is really a sacrificial one, it take much sacrifice to noture children. There is a place of endurance because at the very end it ends with celebration and rewards.
Mothers are amazing. Even when they are tired they will say no they're not. They are the real heroes!
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That's so sweet please do that. Your badiii is already lucky with your mindset. You will be both successful and have a stable job. Let's cheers to that!
I feel sad while reading the post of a mother, you'll see how much she suffer. Being a mother of two children, taking them care alone while your husband doesn't seems to care about your pain is very hard. You're right that maybe she's having a postpartum depression, all she needs is help and i hope her husband will see that. You're really blessed to have a man like your husband po.
Leng, even if I don't have a husband as long as I have a family or someone to count on I'll be fine. But when you're a mother you have kids to protect. They are your life now. But if it's postpartum, you need help, we need to seek help. If you are single, please be wise.
Yes po pag dating talaga sa kids natin kailangan nating maging matatag in order to protect them. It is not bad to seek for help if di mo na talaga kaya, sana ganun gawin ng mother sa fb.
This pierced my heart. I can feel her pain. Not everyone is blessed with a responsible half. And yes are, being a parent is great but it is a big responsibility. I pray for her to harm her children again and herself.
A mother can do everything for her children. But if she has postpartum she needs help. She's having a hard time controlling herself.
Honestly, this is one of the reasons why I want to be self-employed so that I and my wife will have enough time for the family. Most men usually think that family is all about bringing money for food and getting the woman pregnant but they forget that family is beyond that. May God help this broken woman and many others out there with no one to talk to.
Please preach on ma'am. This is a fully loaded article, for the men, the mothers and even the single ladies and gentlemen. Know what you are getting into before it begins. Thanks ma'am. But I feel the woman's pain and still think she will now keep blaming herself again for strangling the child.
Naiyak ako dun sa story nya. Dama ko yun pagod, frustrations and hirap nya. Tama ka, hindi tama yun ginawa nya pero siguro nasagad na sya ng husto. I hope she'll get help soon.... Yes, we can kive without a husband but we cannot live without our children. Lage ko sinasabi sa asawa ko noon nagkaprob kami as a couple, kapag naghiwalay kami eh sa akin ang anak ko, kaya ko mawala sya pero hindi ang anak ko. Although di perfect ang asawa ko, may mga flaws din sya as a husband a a father, but he is doing his best to become one and provide everything for us..
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