November 19, 2021
Sometimes it makes me wonder why people always striving even in the most difficult way and also in the most unconventional phrase of the world. Why not do it in your convenient pleasure? Why do the opposite? why make it hard when there's an easy way to do it?
Lately been running tasks left and right, finally realizing, yeah I do the opposite also. I work as if tomorrow might be begging me to stop working so I need to finish the work intended for the day so that I can work on the new one and not worrying the unfinished of yesterdays.
Overworking and now I have an empty head. I want to cry but I can't even shed a single drop of tear. I became dumb. I worry more and more about work and how to get through with it. I became obsessed on finishing the task. It's all compiling in my mind that it didn't even let me sleep in peace and making me uneasy..
Weak. That's what I heard earlier when I brief my men. We encountered a massive amount of problems since Monday. The site staff can't handle it so we came to rescue and helped them find alternative measures yet I heard some criticism like these from other contractors. Weak you say? But my men didn't even complained and surrender and you kept on saying useless rants. If only I could raise my voice and punch in to their faces that they talk shit like women in heat. Always complaining but not working.
Life gets harder if you think of it in a negative way. As I was writing this, I was looking at the picture of my son's smiling face, looking at me with those adorable eyes that's saying " My Mom is the best" I am longing for his hugs and kisses right at these moment but I know I need to wait until tomorrow night to make it happen. I didn't get to call them earlier since I was busy working. I need to make up with the loss time I had with them.
Yearning for a good rest will never happen to me until next year. Work is a much needed and vacation will be out of the list this time. I'll be making my bucket list unchecked for this year again. Still, I will take this as an opportunity to grow and learn more in this field of work.
SLOWLY my time is being robbed by work, I can't complain anymore because this is the path that I choose. I will just find ways to adjust and make it as a stepping stone in providing for my son and family's need and for our future also.
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I was busy earlier that I can't think of something to write. well, it's always like these I guess heheh.
Time to rest
Thank you for reading!
Keep safe & God Bless!