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I don't know why I'm writing this. Actually, I have a few ideas about what to write but my brain won't cooperate and so I need to maneuver and find something else.
As you all know, I was a little bit broken recently due to the same issue: loove. I can't even spell it right as I don't even know what that word is. I just knew it starts with the letter L and ends with E, and only the lucky ones will see its true beauty.
And as I think of this L--E word, I suddenly remembered what my friend's father used to tell me before when I was still in high school. He said, "You'd be really pretty if you weren't born that way. Boys would be head over heels for you if you were just the same as others."
I understood completely what he was trying to say. However, I just acted dumb and smiled like how I usually reacted when people started telling me something that involved my physical disability.
And then just recently, as I have said, I got a little heartbroken and the thoughts went on and on again at the back of my head. What if I was really born different, would have I found my missing piece already? Would I find my knight and shining armor by now and live happily ever after with our own little kids?
But as they say, it's either you accept the sad truth or live with lies. The choice is yours to make and only you can decide. After a few moments of my "me time," I then realized why men couldn't just stay with me even for just a little while.
I have met a few guys online. Most of them are friends from friends. Before meeting up, they would tell me how pretty I was even after knowing my true self. Some of them would ask for a meetup and after a few times of them persuading me, I ended up saying yes.
The moment they saw me, I could see how disappointed they were in me. Even if they were trying to be cool, they couldn't hide their true reaction. The good thing is, they never said a thing. But as soon as we parted ways, I knew that was the end.
I may look pretty in your eyes, but the face is never enough for most men. No offense to our male readers. But most of them want to be with a total package before they could even consider you a plus. I guess those guys I was in loved with before thought they could learn to like me but in the end, they realized it wasn't worth it.
I don't know the definition of interesting for most men, but I do know I'm a boring one. I think even at this part, I suck big time. I'm an introvert. I don't even play online games, which some men are into. The only thing I'm good at is loving someone with all my heart even if that means I have to break mine and suffer in the end.