I can't breathe without you

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Avatar for ZehraSky
2 years ago

You might already know that I got the title from a song. Actually, this song was on repeat for the first few months of pandemic. Not because I was sad, it's just that I really love sad songs. I think there is just something that calls me to them. The sadder the song is, the more I remember it and the more that I put it on repeat.

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Well, this song is kinda like that. But it also spoke to me because it feels like I can relate to the lyrics.

I was actually surprised because I was feeling nostalgic and sad when I went to Youtube and saw this in one of the recommended. Of course, I clicked on it as I was just in the right mood for it.

As I was listening there were some memories that I remember. And I thought that sharing them here will finally set me free from them.

So I looked for the lyrics of Breathe by Taylor Swift and decided to share what I was thinking about on some parts.

I see your face in my mind as I drive away,
'Cause none of us thought it was gonna end that way
People are people,
And sometimes we change our minds
But it's killing me to see you go after all this time

I remember during graduation, I saw you walking away with your family. The thought of calling out to you went to my mind but I held my tongue and watched you go.

Music starts playin' like the end of a sad movie,
It's the kinda ending you don't really wanna see
'Cause it's tragedy and it'll only bring you down,
Now I don't know what to be without you around

I knew who I was when I'm with you. It felt like I was invincible, as if I could do anything. But we both knew things always come to an end. We knew that and yet, we still foolishly hoped that it will never come for us.

And we know it's never simple,
Never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me
You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand,

And I can't,
Breathe,
Without you,
But I have to,
Breathe,
Without you,
But I have to

We experienced different endings with people so we knew how much it hurts. We knew that it is something that no one can help us get out of. I wished it did not have to be this way. I knew you so much that it felt like you were a part of me.

But now that the ending came for us, I have to keep moving forward, and so do you. We have to keep walking despite the fact that we are now taking different roads from each other.

Never wanted this, never wanna see you hurt
Every little bump in the road I tried to swerve
People are people,
And sometimes it doesn't work out,
Nothing we say is gonna save us from the fall out

It was not your intention to fall, and it was not my intention to not reciprocate. I thought we could still work it out. But the awkwardness eventually got to us. We tried so hard, didn't we? I think that should be enough, but sometimes it isn't. Sometimes, I wished it could have worked out. However, no matter how hard I wished, the outcome will never change.

And we know it's never simple,
Never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me
You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand,

And I can't,
Breathe,
Without you,
But I have to,
Breathe,
Without you,
But I have to

It's two am
Feelin' like I just lost a friend
Hope you know it's not easy,
Easy for me

It's two am
Feelin' like I just lost a friend
Hope you know this ain't easy,
Easy for me

The day after graduation, I could not sleep because I was wondering whether I should congratulate you. After all, we promised each other that we will still be friends. But we were in our respective relationships by then. It finally occurred to me that I just lost my bestfriend. I was the one who started to distance myself from you, but I still feel sad about it. Losing you, felt like I lost a part of me that I did not even notice was there until it's gone.

And we know it's never simple,
Never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me

I can't,
Breathe,
Without you,
But I have to,
Breathe,
Without you,
But I have to

Breathe,
Without you,
But I have to

Sorry (oh) sorry
Sorry sorry
Sorry sorry

I am so sorry for hurting you. I wish it did not have to lead to this. I wish I could still message you out of blue just to rant and be surprised when you reply before I even finished typing all of my messages. I wish I could tease you again about your failed attempts with relationships. I wish I could try to make you treat me to milktea again, or play games with me again. I wish for it so much sometimes that it hurts.

Last time, I wanted to message you but fear got the better of me again. I wish that we could have been each other's bestfriends for a long time. But I think that I should close our book now. I should stop waiting for a chapter that will never be written because I might end up hurting you again.

Closing words

When I first heard this song, I immediately assumed it is for lovers that broke up. But as I listened to it again and again, I realized that it applies to more situations than just that. And I figured out why this song just keeps playing in my mind.

I hope that by writing this down, I will be able to forgive myself for hurting you, and feeling guilty for it. I hope that I can let go of the what-ifs I have about our friendship.

Thank you for being with me during my loneliest days. I enjoyed every memories we made. I still hope for your success and happiness every night. I wish you the best. I am now closing this book of ours that I should have done ages ago.

Farewell, my bestfriend. May you find peace in whatever road you take. Thank you for the memories.



Thank you for reading this article!

If you want to read some more articles of mine, I have monthly summaries here:

September 2021 Articles Summary

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June 2021 Articles Summary

May 2021 Articles Summary


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2 years ago

Comments

Just amazing, you wrote it down, your writing allowed me to have this song lyrics in text format, although every line of this song you have explained very well. I like sad songs very much, because I also have green life in my past, but it turns to dark now a days, that's why you could understand about, every sad song feels like our story of Love.

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2 years ago

Thank you so much! I am glad you enjoyed reading this article.

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2 years ago

Yeah dear I really enjoyed it. Hope so I'll read more from you

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2 years ago

I want to thank you FOr everything zerah, I'm so glad to know you in this platform 💗 . Sobrang hanga ako sa pagiging mapagbigay mo and I wish paulanan ka ng blessing. I know na thank you is enough, but for me it isn't. Sobrang nagpapasalamat ako kasi sinuportahan moko although di ako gaano nakakabisita sa mga articles niyo. Thank you so much zeraaaa 💗 ingat palaagggiiii

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2 years ago

HAHAHA no problem po. I try to give as much as I can po. No need to say thank you always, nakakahiya ih HAHAHA

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2 years ago

I love this type of songs. The lyrics are sorting and sad. I will download it asap.

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2 years ago

Sad songs are definitely the best hehe

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2 years ago

Wow....I also love sad song but there is not specific reason behind that.

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2 years ago

Beautiful words

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Thank you!

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2 years ago

when was the last time you guys communicate with each other? I kinda relate din kasi same thing with my old frenny who suddenly became a stranger lol

$ 0.03
2 years ago

The last time we communicated with each other as bestfriends were way back in 2017. After that, all interaction we had with each other would be because we share the same circle of friends. After graduation, we no longer have any reason to interact. I'm sorry to hear about what happened to the friendship you had po.

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2 years ago

I love Taylor swift song. What happened to your friend sis? I hope you'll meet again..🙏

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2 years ago

We stopped communicating after the awkwardness became too much. We are just like strangers now with some memories together.

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2 years ago

I'm sorry to hear that sis. I relate you sis I have some close friend of mine and now we're like strangers too.🥺

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2 years ago

I'm sorry to hear about what happened to your friendship as well :<

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2 years ago

It's okay sis... I'm so sad what happened too...🥺

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2 years ago

This got me emotional ☹️☹️

$ 0.03
2 years ago

Oh, I'm so sorry huhu

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2 years ago

Try to contact him or her again , don't cut your communication each other .

$ 0.03
2 years ago

It has been a few years since we last talked with each other. I think by now, it is better to just leave each other be.

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2 years ago

It's so sad just try maybe it's waiting for you only

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2 years ago

Maybe I will try someday, but not yet.

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2 years ago