Parasocial Relationship

“Maybe we're all just broken inside. Unable to really grasp the difference between fictional people and people we just don't know. They're all just abstract ideas we're happy to have suffer for our enjoyment.”
― Jonathan Sims

I feel a sense of love from you guys yesterday who took out time to wish me when I complained of having a slight illness. When I try to observe the cause yesterday, apart from the issue of cold water and continuous eating of mango, I found out that lack of electricity, heat and other factors caused such a strange occurrence because when I decide to sit under the cashew tree, I became active and energized that I had to spend more than an hour on Hive and promising myself to return back to Readcash later in the day which I did. Light didn't come, but I gave my brother some money to fuel the generator in the evening and I was in charge for three hours while grandma didn't say anything. If she was the one who bought the fuel, it won´t exceed thirty minutes before she starts shouting at us to put it off because she is wasting money according to her 😂

One of the topics I had in mind which I also made researched on is called “Parasocial Relationships”. Perhaps you would have heard of it before, but if you haven't, sit back while you read through it because we are about to learn something again. I saw this topic being discussed on the Quora Platform and it interest me which made me research more on it because I wasn't understanding much through the short discussion they had. 

WHAT IS A PARASOCIAL RELATIONSHIP? I remember when I was growing up, I love watching movies so much especially Yoruba movies and I detest English movies because I thought I should be proud of my language and honour them too. There are many actors and actresses I admire so much. Then, if you ask me to mention 100 Yoruba actors and actresses, even if I am sleeping, I will slowly mention them to you. That is how much I love their movies then, but now, hardly would I mention 10 because I lose interest in such movies especially since they are acting nonsense today. 

I would crush on many actors and many times would imitate their roles in movies and many times slept thinking about them, yes, I have met many actors in my dream before and if I don´t see their movies, I won´t watch any. I developed an interest in some handsome actors and would always imagine we come across each other and they proposed to me. These people I crushed on do not know someone like me is having an interest in them. This is what we call parasocial relationships. 

It is a one-sided relationship where you as a person, extends your time and energy to them and the person you are having an interest in is unaware of your action toward them. They do not know you are crushing on them, but you alone know you are. 

Many of us have different actors and actresses we think we are in a relationship within our imagination and you start crushing on them, but they aren´t aware of such a move from you. They are busy focusing on their career while you as a person are taking time watching their movies, having different imaginations about them. 

Though there are many who are fans of them and would always love the roles they play either in movies, shows or sports, you just develop feelings for them because you admire their talents or actions. 

Are Parasocial Relationships healthy? There are many people who have become obsessed with these people you see on TV or social media because they are good at what they do, or their physiques made you like or love them, but once you are obsessed with these kinds of people, it might be detrimental and become toxic to your mental health. Though this one-sided relationship can help reduce loneliness and fill the gap in social interaction, they are by no means as effective and healthy as real-life interaction with people. 

Sometimes, you might be dealing with someone who may not even exist but because you come across them on TV or on shows and since you love what you are seeing about them, you start to create a feeling for such a person who has long been dead. Even when you know a vlogger or celebrity is dead, you still want to be a friend to him or her. 

Sign that you are in a parasocial relationship is when you have feelings or connection with either a vlogger, tiktoker, YouTuber, music artist, actor or actress etc and you just want to keep seeing them in every movie or show you watch and once you see them, you develop this interest and feelings of excitement. I know we all are in this kind of relationship but do you know there are benefits to it?

Let´s take Elon musk as an example. We have heard a lot about him and how rich he is. How dedicated and determined he is to be successful, those who are in a parasocial relationship with him when he might not be aware may want to live such life he is living. They start to read more about him and how he became successful and then, you become determined to be successful like him too. 

You developed an interest in being a singer and you found yourself listening to a particular artist and his or her styles of singing, you decide to emulate him or her because of the connection you have built in your mind for him or her. This relationship would make you learn how to sing and start to imitate him or her. 

Parasocial relationships can provide a sense of belonging. Serves as motivation and inspiration to work on yourself to become who the person has become. So as an influencer, once you are inspired by someone you are connected with not physically, you tend to go in that line too. 

Parasocial relationships are actually normal and they are proven to be healthy psychologically because when we see someone through audio or video, we choose to create a bond with them but it becomes harmful when we see them as idols which whom we are obsessed. There should be a limit to liking someone you only see online or hear their voices and want to create a mutual connection with them whereas, they do not know you. 

Thanks for reading. 

Image by  Flow Clark on Unsplash

[May 14, 2022] (No 134 article for the year)