I craved for my freedom
“Freedom lies in being bold.”
Who doesn't want freedom? The truth is that we all do, because we want to do things on our own and not be monitored or checked and this is because we also want to feel responsible and see ourselves as someone capable of doing things on their own.
I have in many ways craved freedom while growing up. I see many adults living on their own and doing things the way they want with no one to keep a tab on them, even their parents weren't around and this made them do whatever they want. Going out and returning when they feel like, buying whatever they like, and even having boyfriends and girlfriends. These are what I see that made me want to leave home quickly.
When I see some girls living alone and cooking different meals, especially when there are groups of ladies in the room, chatting and laughing, I wished I could also be alone. I wish I could also cook the food I want and eat. I wish I could also have a boyfriend we would sit outside together and gist. These were stuff I see around me and they increased my longing for freedom. I wanted it badly then.
I came from a family that would never want to see you around boys. Yes, my parents were so cringed at our lifestyle and would always want to know what is going on. Once they hear us talking to a guy, especially my mom, she would find ways to call us inside and that is the end for that day.
This made my hunger for freedom get higher and I just couldn't wait to be away from home. A place where my parents wouldn't scream at me when they see me talking to boys. A place where they wouldn't scold me for buying things for myself and so on.
But reality dawned on me when I left home, away from my parents and I knew what I didn't value then.
It was when I got admission into the college of education in the year 2012. That was the starting point of my freedom as I was so excited that I was free from my mom's nagging and constant checking of my life. I felt on top of the world when I arrived at my hostel and started living my life with no one to check on me.
The next morning when I woke up, that was when I knew what I was in for. I was alone to wake myself up and not my parents. I was alone making my food instead of my mom. No one to advise me as I took decisions for myself.
I started choosing what is best and wrong for me as I was conscious of everything around me. I got to be responsible for whatever I go through. I became my own parent in another land. I was afraid to step into a relationship because I was just scared, especially getting to know that once you make any mistake, you are on your own.
Though, I got to learn from experiences. I learned how to take responsibility and learned how to choose the best decision for my life. I wasn't with my parents who would caution me but I was alone and would always be mindful of what I eat, what I wear and the kind of friendship I involve with.
Though, there are good sides to being away from home and gaining your freedom and there are disadvantages too. I learned to fight for myself and take all blame for whatever actions I take.
It wasn't easy at first because I have been used to staying with my family but after being away from them, I knew I should have valued them more instead of looking at others and wanting a life like them.
There is time for everything and while you are with your family, you should appreciate and value them in your life because when you are alone and have been granted the freedom you wanted, it won't be easy as you have thought.
Thanks for reading
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[August 07, 2022] (No 219 articles for the year)
I often say freedom is an illusion, there is nothing as total freedom. For example there are somethings you could do at home but can't do when you are in college.
The reality is we don't appreciate what we have until it is taken away.