How to improve ourselves?

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1 year ago

"Before you speak ask yourself if what you are going to say is true, is kind, is necessary, is helpful. If the answer is no, maybe what you are about to say should be left unsaid".

Bernard Meltzer

When we talk about improvement, what comes to your mind? Perfection? Looking great? Adding more value to yourself? Changing your lens to a better perspective? Every human being wants a change and this can't be done while sitting on a spot and expecting an awesome change for yourself. Change is constant and everyone keeps changing from old ways into a new ones and we call this an improvement.

If you want to improve your writing skills, you go through those who have experience and are professional to help guide you so you can also be better.

You want to improve your cooking and you need more styles and recipes to make your technique amazing, you go online to see how experts are making different meals every day and when you decide to try yours, even though you keep failing and making mistakes, we are told to keep practising again until we are comfortable of doing the best.

Improvement is all about practising until it is better and you are comfortable with it.

Let's take a look at some ways to improve ourselves, especially becoming the better person we want to be because no one wants to remain stuck but to bring peace to themselves.


Stop discussing your personal life with every second person.

You have every right to your privacy and no one should infringe in it except you allow it. Having the right to your privacy is an ability to determine when, how and for what purpose you want your personal information to be handled by others.

Privacy is everything, tell them what is necessary.

The truth is that there are things you should keep to yourself instead of telling others and putting your life in their hands because when the time comes, the person you believe to have trusted will use it against you. No one can ever keep your secret even if you tell them not to. Our mouths are wired to speak anytime depending on the situation on ground and when words come out of your mouth, it is like an egg that when broken can never be packed up again.

A tip to protect your privacy is to limit the personal information about your life that you share with other people, and keeping them to yourself will make you have peace with no one standing against you.

Your personal information is different from a secret. The difference is that your secret might include those past mistakes you have done and making people know could be dangerous especially in the future while your personal information might be things you intend to do to be successful and it is not everything people would know about you. Make them know the ones that are necessary perhaps which may also help them too.

Though we expose our secret to make the other person learn from it which is better, and when it is being shared with the wrong people, they would take it up against you someday which may then delay your progress. It is not everyone that needs to know things about you. At least your family is there to know more about you than trusting an outsider who would go around talking behind you.

The only time a secret is shared to learn from them is when the other person is trying to go in the way you already went and not wanting them to make such mistakes, you guide them through your experience and how you were able to overcome and become who you are.

But when your information goes into the wrong hand, it degrades your personality which makes you look stupid for ever revealing yourself to them. Keep your personal information to yourself and if you must think of talking to someone, make sure you have studied and perceived such a person and if you are still unquestionable about the person, then talk to your siblings or someone in your family. Your family will protect you no matter what happens.

I remembered when I got an admission and I was sharing a room with my friend. We both processed the admission together. I had a break up in my relationship and I thought she was someone I could talk to since I have known her while studying at the college of education. I opened up to her about the breakup and how we had fun together. This lady went to share it with her school father and the next day, the guy called me wanting to speak with me.

He started encouraging me about the situation in my relationship. He said his spirit told him of what I was passing through and wanted to advise me. Immediately, I knew she had gone to tell him everything. I was weakened but decided not to say anything or confront her, but from that day onward, I stopped sharing things about myself with her.

There are information about you that would help you get to where you wish to be, but opening up to them and letting them know of your plans would make them do things at your back and ruin everything for you.

You don't know who is happy or sad about your achievement and sharing things with them means you are placing your life in their hands to take control of it and they would happily shake you from right to left until you are nothing.

To be continued…..

Thanks for reading

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[May 15, 2022] (No 135 article for the year)

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Avatar for Princessbusayo
1 year ago

Comments

I stopped sharing my secret with people , the day I was betrayed by my own friend..we had a little fight and she posted all my secrets to everyone..I was so downcastef

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1 year ago

Practice makes perfection, and by practicing we get to improve ourselves. You're also right about Privacy, a lot of people underestimate it's value, and many times it ends up coming back to haunt them. We really should be careful of people we disclose our personal issues with. Not many are happy with our achievements.

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1 year ago

Exactly. We may think they love us with their expression with us but they are thinking of ruining our plans.

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1 year ago

Personally i am choosy of the people i share my secrets with, even some family members can sell you out to an outsider. It is not everyone that can keep secrets shared with them, and if i notice this attitude in anyone be it family or friend i can never share my private information with such a person.

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1 year ago

You are right. Even families now stab each other at their back. We just need to be careful. Thank you 😊

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1 year ago

Thank you for the article. It takes love to share such an article.

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1 year ago

Just like the story I shared few days ago... Tell people what's necessary...they don't need to know everything about you. Not everyone should hold the right to know everything about you because they might just use it against you when things aren't going their way or when things are not right between you two.

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1 year ago

You are very right. It´s not everyone people need to know about you because when you share all, you are definitely placing your life into their hands and they won´t stop until they ruin you. Thank you, KP 😎

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1 year ago

This so true. Privacy should be our most cherished asset cause you can't really trust the people you call your "friends". They can betray you anytime both for free or when paid. Making them a repository of your life secrets and personal details is dangerous.

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1 year ago

Thank you for your contribution, Mekus

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1 year ago

I wonder why it's so difficult for some people to keep their personal life private, they even go as far as sharing every small detail on social media. Your brother slapped your wife then your wife slapped your mother and you decided it will be a good idea to bring it to Instagram and ask for advice 🤦

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1 year ago

They will surely get what they deserve. Social media is the worst place to go to expose your personal info because the outcome wouldn´t be something you never expected.

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1 year ago

Any person lives near to chest always stay pleased because his privacy remains intact. It saved us from lot of embarrassing moment and improve our self control power.

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1 year ago

You are very right. Thank you for reading.

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1 year ago

Firstly, what's I would say is that if you really want to improve in life you have to do more and more of what you do and you still have to make new strategies and new techniques of doing the particular thing you know how to do. Also, whenever You are doing something, you don't need to tell anybody. Let your achievements speak for you

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1 year ago

Great. Your achievement will speak for you instead of opening up to someone who might stop your progress. Thank you for your comment.

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1 year ago

So the school Daughter is the spirit that told him about the breakup, what a wow 😅 One sharing his or her next move with someone else is really dangerous as you have said.

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1 year ago

😂 Very dangerous and we should be careful.

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1 year ago

I really value privacy, that's why I didn't share my personal problem to others. You're right, we should be careful on sharing our personal problem to people especially if that's person is not close to you or you're not sure if they can understand you

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1 year ago

Yes, there are some who would find it fun to tarnish one´s image due to information shared with them and it´s really bad.

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1 year ago

On point, I am not a man of sharing my problem with the world or the social media, some I just kept it inside, and I'm immune, lol. Exactly seek some knowledge in person who had. That's an upgrade.

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1 year ago

Yes, we may sometimes try to speak up indirectly to gain some knowledge and learn from others´experience.

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1 year ago

What causes see finish is when you tell people your secret. They then know everything about your life. It is better to be conservative with your personal information so you will at least have value to other people

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1 year ago

Yes, keeping information to ourselves will make us valuable. Thank you

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1 year ago

I know a lot of people talking about their personal life, and I am the one adjusting always like I felt that its my obligation to not also tell others about them haha

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1 year ago

Yes, it´s our obligation to keep info about ourselves to ourselves and only say what is necessary.

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1 year ago

We can also improve ourselves by Surrounding ourself with people who want to see us do well and also evaluating what isn't working and holding us back and eliminate those habits

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1 year ago

Great! We need to watch out for people with similar interests with ours so it can be easier to learn from them while you seek out knowledge too.

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1 year ago

Honestly, we don't have to share everything about us to everyone, either by chance or mistake. I am being careful with that too

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1 year ago

Yes, let´s be careful and mindful too.

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1 year ago

That's why it's important to be careful of the people we share our privacy with, not even our Best friends. We are all human and we can change. I'm not saying we should not share our privacy with anyone, but we should be mindful of whom we are talking to, some people are just there to ruin your Life, a Yoruba proverb say " eyinkunle lo'ta wa, ile la'seni nbe" i don't know if I'm right with the spelling, 🤣🤣🤣, but I know you'll understand what i write here... Lol

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1 year ago

Sure, the proverb is correct and that is the truth. We don´t know people's mind and we need to be careful and mindful of what we say. Thank you, Mary 😊

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1 year ago

There are people like that.. they look and act as if they care, but as soon you have demystified yourself to them, they begin to take you for a ride. No one everyone is attracted and respect people who talk very little

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1 year ago

We should be careful what we say when talking and it is advisable to speak little and slowly so you´d be cautious of every word in your mouth.

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1 year ago

Trust is important but there are still things one should keep to themselves, especially nowadays where trust is becoming extinct.

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1 year ago

We cannot trust people now because you might not even know who to trust again so you don´t have to be surprised at their behaviour.

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1 year ago

Sharing personal info is one of the most risky and dangerous outcome that might affect us in the future, what if wht you shared to other might drive you or some that will use that againts you in the future

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1 year ago

This is the reason to keep them safe with you so you don´t have to blame yourself sharing it out.

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1 year ago

I agree. I'm also not into making my life public. In fact, I feel uncomfortable every time I need to post something on social media. Unfortunately, people nowadays always have the urge to update other people about their life. I don't have something against that as it is their life. It's just that their practices don't work for me.

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1 year ago

It doesn´t work for me too because we all are different and we should at least give value to ourselves.

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1 year ago

Hard work is at the root of improvement. If you want to improve in any work, you have to work hard. Development is not possible without hard work. Even if you can't read, the test result will not be good.

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1 year ago

I agree on this. I remember my sister at work before was surprised when her workmates knew that she was a single mom.as she never talk about it. Only to know lt here so called friend told their workmates😬. So it is really better if we always put bounderies

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1 year ago

Yes, setting boundary to our personal info is the best.

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1 year ago

Improvement doesn't come without doing anything, it is something we must work on before we can earn it.

It is true that we need to keep things personal, I usually wish people can honor the purpose of others sharing things that are personal with them.

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1 year ago

Those sharing their personal info want people to keep them and it becomes hurting when you think you had to trust the person but they end up betraying you with it. It´s better to keep them to yourself.

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1 year ago

self-protection is a way to do true privacy by keeping all the secrets that exist because it is a weapon that is within us so that all will be protected.

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1 year ago

Yes, privacy is like protecting yourself from dangers that might lurk around people. Thank you for reading.

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1 year ago

People take the meaning of our conversation in to their own meaning we must be careful about our private life and it should not be discussed with anyone else

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1 year ago

Exactly! We should be careful with what we disclose to people.

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1 year ago