Relationship Drama.

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I read a post two days ago about how some people date for weird reasons and most notably some ladies who date for money. Many people would decide to date someone due to pressure or because of what they stand to gain from such a person and any of these two reasons would never sustain that relationship. You need to stop wasting your time on someone who doesn’t feel the same way as you and also on someone that you don't have genuine feelings for.

I was disappointed to read a story many years ago on the internet. It gave me mixed feelings because we can tilt it to both sides. I felt the two people in question should have done better than what they did. They both have ulterior motives for dating each other and it was crystal clear and it was not a surprise when it hits the rock.

They claimed they have been dating for a while and the guy in question had to source for 20,000 Naira (roughly $50 back then) to help his girlfriend pay for her school fees. After the guy paid for it, shortly after the girl "broke up" with the guy. The dejected guy felt disappointed and angry. I felt he must have gone through a lot just to pay for the lady’s school fees.

I felt his friends must have taunted him as well and visibly angry, the boyfriend went to his girlfriend’s class and told her since they are no longer dating; she should pay him back his money. Everyone was looking in disbelief and pressure from the friends got on the boyfriend and he started dragging the lady. The lady’s friends tried to intervene but he dragged her out and beat her up and the lady had to promise to pay back soon amidst tears and embarrassment.

The guy walked away and he went for her, dragging her again so that the security and some lecturers had to intervene to pacify the guy. It was a shameful moment for the girl in question and I believe the guy should be a bit ashamed too.

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I won't justify the action of the guy...it was childish, to say the least, but then, why would you date a guy you are not in love with? Or let me say, why would you collect money from him when you know the love isn't as deep as you would expect? She can do better and she should have known better. She should have shown a bit of self-respect but she allowed her need to override her thinking. She must feel she is using the guy but it blew out.

The guy didn’t act with maturity too. I know he must have acted based on love by sourcing for the girl’s school fees and also not knowing how he got the money which I know might not be all that easy for him; seeing how he reacted and all, but he could have done better too. I understand that no one likes being taken for a fool or being taken for granted but he should have done better. He embarrassed himself and it feels justifiable that the lady left him maybe she has noticed how childish he could be which was why she left him in the first place and that's why I also blamed her for allowing her needs to override logical thinking.

Since she knows how childish the guy can be or for whatever reason she had for breaking up with the guy, she shouldn’t have collected the money in the first place if she knew she is not really in love with the guy. With love, you try to overlook some things (keyword... SOME). When you know something doesn’t go down well with you, you don’t have to waste too much time on it.

A lot of people date for fun and it baffles me. I don’t have that luxury of time to waste my priced resources; time, on someone I am not ready to go the extra mile for. I still wonder how people do it. It is a lot of investment and wasted effort to try and date someone you have no feelings for whatsoever. Please, if you know you are not willing to take your feelings to the next level with the person you claimed you love, then let them be. Leave them...tell them no, let them hurt and move on. You don't have to date people because you don't want them to feel bad.

Be honest with them and don’t try to exploit them, hoping your feelings would change later. Don't try to exploit the feelings they have for you to enrich yourself. It is better to hurt them with your honesty than to show pity while trying to find your feelings, only to be tagged as a user and exploiter. When the feeling isn't there, it isn't there. There is no need to find what's lost and this is why it's good to be friends with people first to be able to know their habits a bit.

Thank you for your time.

My pen doesn't bleed, it speaks. I am love's chemical content in human form and that's why I advise people to take a dose of "Olawalium" daily. 🙈

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