Peter In The Deep.

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2 years ago
Topics: Life, Harassment, Rape, Blogging, Nigeria, ...

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He said "even though I don't know the way out, I will continue to act like nothing happened and perhaps I drown in this deep blue sea. I have had enough cups of this blue water being served to me, I am not scared of drowning and by the way, who cares?" These were the words of my friend, Peter. Truly, behind every clothed human is nakedness. Everyone has their own story to share for everyone has their share of life.

Peter and I have been good friends since our secondary school days. He was one of the friends that have stayed while others left. He has been a whole vibe and an energetic person even to date but since the inception of our friendship, I have noticed that he doesn't talk more about himself. When it comes to himself, he only talks on the surface, nothing deep.

At first, I thought he was just being unserious about his life but he has ambitions so I erased that thought about him. Peter was born into a comfortable family of six, he has three sisters and he was the only son too. His parents were high-rank civil servants and they could afford all the family needs to be comfortable.

Peter and I attended a boarding secondary school and he was everybody's kind of guy including the seniors and teachers. When we resumed for the then 2012/2013 session, we started our preparations for the secondary school certificate examination, although rumours had it that a female teacher had eyes on my friend, Peter. I didn't believe it because I don't know why a teacher will have such feelings for a male student. Even though I noticed that Peter and the said female teacher were quite close, I took it for mentorship because other than mentorship, there should be nothing that would make a male student and a female teacher THAT close.

Immediately after closing hours, Peter would find his way to the staff quarters without informing anyone about it and when I try to ask about his whereabouts, he would tell me that he was either in the juniors' class or the table tennis court. I wasn't a fan of table tennis, so I wouldn't know if he was lying. It was when he decided to open up to me years later that I realized that he wasn't lying because he wanted to lie but due to fear and shame.

He said the teacher had instructed him to always report to the staff quarters immediately after school before other teachers arrive at the staff quarters. The first time he was instructed by the teacher to go there, he thought she wanted to send him on an errand around school until the teacher expressed her emotions to him. He said she told him that anytime she sees him, she loses focus and she always feels like Peter should just grab her, kiss her and sleep with her.

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Peter said he was trying to comprehend what she was saying at that moment only for him to look up and see his teacher naked before him. He pleaded with her to allow him to go, he told her he wouldn't do such to his teacher. She then told him that she will do the job herself, she then grabbed Peter, and forced him to her bed where she pinned him down with her body and raped Peter!

After the incident, Peter was warned by his teacher never to tell it to anyone and he must continually report to the staff quarters after school, this went on and on. He was threatened that if he dares to tell anyone, she would ensure he was expelled from the school for a crime he didn't willingly commit. Peter had no choice but to dance to her tune.

This occurrence drained Peter's energy and he lost focus on his studies even though he was still trying to be himself, but really, scars can never be hidden. Teachers started to complain about Peter's grades and he tried studying harder but he just couldn't focus. The Secondary School Certificate Examination came and went. Everyone went home until it was time to check the results.

Everyone came back to school to check the results, although it wasn't only Peter that failed his exams he wasn't just part of those that I expected to fail. I was disappointed in him even though we still kept our friendship. His parents were disappointed in him too but who knew that it wasn't his fault? "Despite the plans I had for you, I can't believe you couldn't pass your examination once, you'll have to resit for the exam with your juniors in the same school the following year" his father said. Peter pleaded with his father not to make him go back to the school, he even begged his mother to plead with his father but his mother said "You should have passed your examination once if you know you didn't want to sit with your juniors."

Peter explained that the issue wasn't about sitting with his juniors but his issue was going back to the school he left but all his pleas fell on deaf ears. How would he explain to them that he was being harassed? His parents have always told him to be a man, how would he express himself to them? His ego as a young man went down the drain with it.

Peter was made to go back to school, the harassment continued and since it wasn't new to him, he was able to cope this time. Luckily for him, time flew and he passed his examination. His parents were happy for him but deep within Peter, he was sinking in the blues. He was a sad and depressed soul but he had to move on with life because who would believe him? He got into the university and this time around, he was the one having sugar mummies (older women who pry on sex with younger ones) around him.

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I thought he had gone wayward and I've even decided to cut off the relationship between us but before I made up my mind, I decided to call his attention to it. At first, he didn't want to open up but I was finally able to earn his trust and that was when I heard his part of the story.

Till now, no one knows about Peter's story except me, although he has permitted me to share his story he isn't ready to leave the path of life he is used to. He still doesn't know the way out and all his parents want for their only son is that he succeeds in life. Truly, success is good but what about the deep blue sea that he is drowning in? When will they have time to have a deep talk about life with him? When will they be able to earn his trust and understand his story? What will be their reaction? Society wants a man to be strong, so who would believe his story? He thought to himself many times too.

I have read many life stories, what it gives, the inbalances and all, I have judged many actions thinking the actors are wrong and insensitive but I have come to realize that I am the insensitive one. The truth is that experiences make each and everyone out there. Shall I speak of how the world has been stereotypical too? Placing value on one over another. The girl-child is this and that and the boy-child is this and that.

The fact remains that both genders need the same energy; the same energy you give to a girl-child should be given to a boy-child. Never tell a boy child to "man up" while telling the girl child to express her feelings, it doesn't work that way. Every male child is a Peter, Pet-her (in this case, Pet him), pity-him too and let them know it's okay to be embarrassed and cry. Behind every male is an invisible "FE" which stands for feelings and emotions. Men are allowed to hurt too and we shouldn't always tell them to man up even when they are crumbling inside. Who doesn't need help?

Thank you for your time.

My pen doesn't bleed, it speaks. I am love's chemical content in human form and that's why  I advise people to take a dose of "Olawalium" daily. 🙈

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Avatar for Olasquare
2 years ago
Topics: Life, Harassment, Rape, Blogging, Nigeria, ...

Comments

Awww this is so serious nowadays but before I didn't hear of female raping a male, but nowadays the whole world has really turn to what we don't understand anymore. I can vividly remember one of my friends who once escape from the same problem, and what surprised me most is that the woman in question was a married woman, and I wonder what could cause a married woman to involve in such act. I really feel this is totally wrong.

$ 0.05
2 years ago

It is totally wrong in every sense of that word. I can't understand their reasons either but it must have been a bad habit while growing up.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

My teacher in college was married to a student but they settle down legally,unlike this one that's starts with an abuse,and now Peter seems like falling into a trap that he could hardly get out. I wish for Peter that one day,he will be brave enough to stand in his rights as a man,and able to escape from the complicated situation.

$ 0.05
2 years ago

I really wish he would have the courage to leave that life and also go and face that teacher for what she did to him.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

This is rather unfortunate. I have heard several stories about young men who were intimately assaulted in their younger years but they never found the voice to let the whole world know about it. Reason because they might be thought weak or no one would believe them and the situation might turn messy.

$ 0.03
2 years ago

Yes, no one would believe them because the moment the lady starts shedding a few tears, they would switch the table on the guy's head. That's why most guys never speak.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

So sad to know about this boy. It is often hears in news how a woman is being seduced but rare to see a male going through this and pleading with the teacher to let him go. She must be literally punished for disturbing the child mentally and physically.

$ 0.03
2 years ago

She really disturbed him mentally and physically and now he is on another path...a journey of no return which is shameful. The parents should be ashamed too.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Yes though its not the mistake of parents. Children should open up and parent should be ready to listen.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Not the mistake of the parents you say? If parents showed themselves trustworthy, children would speak. If they cared to ask him why he didn't want to go back rather than exert their authority, they would have been reasonable.

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2 years ago

They should have at least given him a listening ear, the fact that parents are only concerned about female children's protection is a terrible thing. They would have listened and asked why he didn't want to return to the school if Peter was a girl.

It would be difficult to leave that path, the teacher really messed up things in his life.

$ 0.03
2 years ago

That teacher messed him up real good and I was angry for him. Parents need to stop this preference and understand what's important. We are losing it when even a child can't trust his or her parents to tell them what's bothering her. I wondered what kind of parenting they are doing.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Parent and child relationship should be the top priority for every parent because it is a terrible thing when a child can't confide in his or her parent.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Absolutely terrible. I don't know but these parents should enrol for a course in parenting. It's shocking.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

This is so sad. Especially to know he wants to be heard, at the same time he feels ashamed to open up. He needs someone who'll stay with him, until he feels okay. Even just a friend who'll listen and comfort him. I hope that he'll eventually go out of the trap and start again. There is still hope for him. He can ask for professional help. He should not be ashamed, he's the victim. The teacher deserves to be in jail.

$ 0.05
2 years ago

Absolutely, my friend. He is the victim and he needs to get to that point where he needs to forget what the society says and focus on getting the help he needs because he is slipping down the road of mental health crisis and it's not a good place to be in.

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2 years ago

And because he's a man no one will believe that he will get raped by a woman, especially a teacher. A laugh, that's what he will get. And he can't let it out as it will make him feel less than what he is. Because men as you say and as the world told you to be, you are strong. You cannot cry. Men should not. His mental health is drowning. I hope he gets the help and understanding he needs. And that if we want equality then it should be the same for everyone. Be it a man or a woman.

Have you seen the video of a woman beating a man? Physical abuse? But no one stopped her. But if it's the other way round, she will get helped. Someone will rescue her. Very wrong.

$ 0.10
2 years ago

This comment momma summarizes everything. You hit the nail on the head, momma.

Yes, I've seen quite some videos about a woman beating a man and the crowd were cheering her while also laughing at the man for being weak because they feel he allowed a woman to beat him. It's a crazy world we live in.

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2 years ago

Gosh a new thing for me a female teacher raping her own male student, this is such a serious and illegal sexual harassment. I had a friend who al have a relationship to his teacher but they put it in illegal his teacher resigned to his job in our school and transfer to another school so that they wouldnt broke any rules in school.

$ 0.03
2 years ago

As long as it is not mutual, it is wrong. I have no issues with older people dating younger people as long as it is within the law and it's not forced or shady and all parties involved knows about it...but Peter didn't get that opportunity.

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2 years ago

My oh my! This is really touching... A female teacher raped him! Goodness gracious! Had she no pride? Now, he's with a scar, a deep scar that has turned him into something else. Say no to molestation. Be it the girl child or the boy child. I never really knew boys really get raped too. Oh! What a society!!!.

$ 0.05
2 years ago

Trust me, Ella. Boys get raped but it doesn't make the news because the society believes a man to be strong. They have never seen a man as the victim because they believed we should always use our strength to get away from being a victim. It's quite sad.

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2 years ago

Who doesn't need help? The truth is everyone does, I feel for Peter because if his parents had just listened to the unsaid words behind his pleads, things wouldn't have gone this far, words like ' he needs to act like a man ' as ruined a lot of children life and still ruining it. Every child needs to be pampered irrespective of their gender. This story brings in the story of a boy (he was a boarder also) who died this year , I have forgotten his name but social media never forgets, if this child pleads were heard like Peter's, who knows, he might still be alive. Parents needs to sit tight and hold onto their kids or might as well go for any parenting class and know that their kids needs attention, though I know it hard with how the economy is but still, create chance, prioritize them. Be curious on why they are pleading not to do this and make sure you get to the bottom of the matter. That's what good parents does.

$ 0.05
2 years ago

Thank you so much, dear. Parents are not bonding so well with their children and they should be able to understand a shift in pattern when it concerns their children. They should be trusted enough so that their child can approach them and be honest with them. It's sad that they are allowing children bottle so much inside.

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2 years ago

They are bottling a lot, at the end society will mock them for becoming who they are now. If Peter were to come out in his state of being addicted to sugar momma's, people will judge and same parents will shake their head in disappointment towards him. Whereas they were the one that never created time to hear him out, you'd hear words like, after all we've done for you ehn, we provided for your needs, what else do you want?. That's when the answer Attention comes in. He/She needs attention. Create time. Gosh, pardon my words but I got to add this, Most parent suck.!

$ 0.02
2 years ago

You spoke my mind there. Parents are fond of saying that. They think the only thing a child need is for them to put food on the table. It's shameful.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

That's the bad effect of our environment. Sex with a student very negative act was played by her. Teachers are like parents, now what the behaviour of people at that moment? Have they control themself

$ 0.03
2 years ago

Indeed, it's the bad effect and it reflects badly on the society.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

This is an interesting life story.. I’ve also heard of female teacher having sex with a student. Peter’s dad and mother didn’t studied his behavior well and I think he will lose a lots of strength back then. But If Peter was wise he should have informed the school principal about all this after he passed the exam.

$ 0.05
2 years ago

I love that. He should have informed the school principal the moment he passed out but I guess he has grown used to loving it which is quite sad.

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2 years ago

No matter what the gender is, everyone needs help. It's okay if a man cry, co'z we don't know what they are dealing behind that masculine body of them. No need to say "man up" coz they already are. Most man needs someone who understand their feelings just like every woman needs

$ 0.03
2 years ago

Absolutely, it's all about understanding the feelings. We live by the societal rules for too long and it's not helpful at all.

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2 years ago

I just think that every parent usually and always give deaf ears to their male children, saying in their mind that they are men they can take care of themselves and at times we all forget that men get hurt and things pain us too just like the women and because of that idea that all men are men has made the men just feel the can't show or tell others about their feelings and that kills every man inside because he wants to talk but he can't because sometimes he think he will be referred to as a weak man

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2 years ago