@Nyctofiles

@Nyctofiles 15 July 2021

Thank you po for sponsorship @Corpsekunno. God bless po.

@Nyctofiles 15 July 2021

What Time Is It? It's Time for Fun! :Never Have I Ever Challenge These past few days, even today, I've been stressed, frustrated, disappointed and emptied. I was busy doing my incomplete school works. I am disappointed to myself about that and stressed from the products of my procrastination and laziness. When I have extra time, I use it to watch some documentaries in Youtube particularly 'I Witness'. The topics are heavy and made me sad and I learned a lot. I also received a bad result about my college admission in one of my dream universities. What a tough times for me. It is okay not to be okay but I am not okay to be not okay this time. That's why it's time to comeback, write again, and have fun. I was tagged by @kli4d and now I decided to go with the flow and be one of those who enjoyed the **'Never Have I Ever '** Challenge that's been circulating all over the platform. Never have I ever listened to country music Country music is not my cup of tea because I am into alternative, rock, pop punk, and pop music. I have listened to country music of my favorite artist. I am not into country music unless it's *Taylor Swift*. Some of my favorite country songs from Taylor are *Begin Again*, *Change*, *You Belong With Me*, *Ours*, and the nostalgic and iconic *Love Story*. Never have I ever colored my hair a strange color As far as I remember, my hair was dyed only one in my whole life. That time, I was still a kid and it's not my idea to dye my hair. The color was light brown which I considered not strange. I never have colored my hair a strange color, YET. I am looking forward to dye my hair in college, especially in ones that have freedom of expression and the time I was away from home so they won't tease me. I want to dye my hair *pink* just like *Tyler* from *Twenty One Pilots* and *Dylan Minette* from *Wallows* and color *green*. I know it will look weird to me but why not HAHAHA. Never have I ever gone skinny dipping I never experienced skinny dipping or swimming completely undressed. When I was a kid, I was never naked swimming in the beach or in our own inflatable pool at home. I know it may sound weird, pardon me. Skinny dipping is in my bucket list HAHAHA. Of course,I would love to do it in solitude or in private part of rivers or beaches. I think it was not exhibition. But before that I should learn to swim first or probably die from drowning. Never have I ever zip lining Zip lining is one the extreme adventures I really want to experience since I was young. I always see this in feature shows and adventure shows in TV. I experienced zip lining when I was around 11 when we had a vacation in Palawan. I was nervous at first but it was fun. I hope I can do this again in different fun poses. Never have I ever stayed up for 24 hours straight What a piece of cake. I have stayed up for 24 hours straight. I'm used to it and did it for countless times. When I was in Grade 10,I was part of Citizenship Advancement Training (C. A. T) Officers. So when there programs in schools, we're always in charged and have duty. Most of the time, in every month, there are programs that are held in the night in school. Because of this, we don't sleep to monitor students, rove around the campus, assist in the programs, and keep and clean after the program. I miss this experience. Also when I was in Grade 11, I am helping my uncle to cook *puto–*a form of rice cake. We start cooking from midnight til 4 AM, so it can be displayed and sold in the public market in morning. I have a hundred-fifty pesos salary for this so sometimes I help him even I have classes. So I go to school, sleep deprived and look like a zombie. And I am always asleep in class and my mind is in haze. I'm glad that coffee is my friend. Never have I ever had my photo taken with a famous person I met some celebrities in my life. But I only experienced having a photo with only one of them. I ever had my photo taken with a famous person, no other than *Robi Domingo.* It was when I was in Grade 12. I was a contestant for the Grand Finals of Battle of the Brains in Dumaguete City,a quiz bee promoting renewable energy and environment . And Robi was the host in the last part and also he is a renewable energy advocate. My partner and I placed for just Third Runner Up which was still a good thing. Soon, I will have photos with Twenty One Pilots and Taylor and my other favorite artists. Never have I ever tried cutting my friend's hair I have and I'm always doing it,but not the barber thing of cutting hair. . When we are doing projects which is the time we are using scissors, I always joking on my friends and classmate that I'm attempting to cut their hair. And I sometimes cut just few millimeters and show it to them. Also, I remember when I was in Grade 2. We are doing school work and I am using a scissors. I was standing behind my classmate and I didn't know that my scissors in hand is placed near her head. I snapped close the scissors and cut her hair. I cut some of her hair for more or less six inches long. I didn't talk to her for a while because I was ashamed that I cut her hair. I know that girls really value their hair. Never have I ever laughed at an appropriate time. I ever laughed at an appropriate time, always. Pardon me. Most instances are during the prayer in class. Some times my friends are laughing when praying so I laughed at him/ her too. Also, when reciting memorized poems and speech im front of class. Some of my classmate made me laugh so I laugh while reciting. There are also times when the teacher is angry, one of my classmate is joking quietly about what's the teacher is saying. When I always laugh when I heard these jokes. Then the teacher will become angrier because I was laughing when he caught me. Never have I ever chewed someone else's already chewed gum I never have and I never will. Yuck. But when we are still C. A. T Applicants, the officers ahead of us experienced chewing a gum and passing it to the one next in line until it reach the last officer. I'm glad that we never experienced this, if ever, I will never hesitate to quit. But I experienced using one handkerchief for the all of us and one cup of water for all during our training in C. A. T. Never have I ever mistaken someone for someone else I have and for multiple embarassing times. Last school year, when there was still face to face classes in my eleventh grade. I called someone "flat" thinking that she was my friend. They have similar height and hair from behind so mistaken my school mate from the special class for my friend. Then she turned around, and I just run away HAHAHHA. Also, this happen many times. When I was a kid, I am alwayd holding my mother's hand so I can't get lost while strolling in the mall. There are times that I let go, then hold my mother's hand again without knowing it was stranger's. A moment I want to disappear in the world for seconds. Again, I was tagged by @kli4d and you can read his article about this challenge here: Never have I ever challenge: Exposing myself Thank you very much, I had fun answering this ice breaker game. https://read.cash/@kli4d/never-have-i-challenge-exposing-myself-f6c345e7 If you haven't participated in the challenge yet, I want to tag you @wakeuplincs , @Viktor105 , @Corpsekunno and anyone who are reading this who want to join. I've been inactive for days so I'm not aware who already wrote an article about the challenge. You can use the link below: https://randomwordgenerator.com/never-have-i-ever-question.php Check out my recent article: Nakakapagpabagabag na Pagkahabag https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/nakakapagpabagabag-na-pagkahabag-si-tessie-at-ang-kwento-ni-toto-45b9e4b4

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@Nyctofiles 9 July 2021

Medyo busy ako sa incomplete requirements kasi grad-waiting. Di ako masyado makapagsulat at basa ng mga articles. Abangan niyo nalang flash fiction ko about the prompt and more.

@Nyctofiles 6 July 2021

Power of Music: When the Songs Asked Questions I'm lying on the bed while staring at the blank ceiling that faded into darkness. It's past midnight and I can't help myself to sleep. The darkness and deafening silence ruled the surrounding –that's what I like and need. Since I can't put myself into a deep slumber, I decided to leave the bed. Then, I headed to my study table in the living room and switched on the lamp. I have multiple pens in my pen holder but none of those are working so I grabbed a crappy pencil instead and my notebook to transfer my story in my mind into my notebook. What a brainless I am. I have a pile of books I bought few days ago in the sale at National Book Store and I forgot to buy some ballpens which I really need. Anyway, as long as I can write it's okay. I just really need to write at the moment to calm my mind and express, besides, sleepiness doesn't want to visit me. To sustain myself with energy, I prepared a cup of coffee that I could drink while writing. I opened my phone and went directly to a music streaming app and played my favorite playlist. I made sure that the volume is not loud enough wake everyone in the house or disturb any wandering souls around. I still haven't replaced the earphones I broke a month ago so I listen to music through this way. While I am scribbling my thoughts into the paper I am also paying attention to the songs I'm listening to. ***"What's my problem? "*** I sang along to the first line of the song **Levitate** of my favorite band **Twenty One Pilots**. It's a habit of mine to ask myself the question that I can find in any songs I listen to even sometimes the lines become kind of out of context. ***"I don't really know,"*** I answered in my mind. I have many worries but I don't know really know what my problem is. It feels there's something I need to fix or something I should seek but I don't know what it is. It's bothering me. ***"Are you searching for purpose? "*** I questioned myself when the song **Kitchen Sink** played. . It's a line from another song of **Twenty One Pilots.** ***"I don't really know, "***my answer in my mind. I don't know what I am doing in my life. Everything I do seems meaningless and pointless. Then, my top favorite song from **The Script**, **Nothing** played. I asked myself from it's first two lines, ***"Am I better off dead? Am I better off a quitter? "*** ***"I don't really know,"*** my same answer. I ignored the first question because I don't want to die yet. I am not good at anything even in what I'm doing right now–writing. I'm just a mediocre so sometimes think I should quit at what I'm doing. Another **Twenty One Pilots** song played. It's **We Don't Believe What's on TV** and I can't help myself to avoid thinking about this line, ***"What if my dream does not happen? Would I just changed what I've told my friends? "*** ***"I don't really know, "*** I answered in my mind again. I don't even know what would I react. May be yes, even in simpler ones like admission to my dream university. Probably, I would just tell them that I have a change of heart. ***"Can you save my heavydirtysoul? "*** this repetitive line from **Heavydirtysoul** by **Twenty One Pilots** was stuck on my mind when this song played. ***"I don't really know,"*** I just answered even though I think He can. But what if I'm agnostic theist who still doubt His existence. I'm a sinner. My top favorite song from my another favorite band played. It's **If I Believe You** by **The 1975**. I asked myself from the lines of the song, ***"And if I believe You/ Will that make it stop? / If I told You I need You/ Is that what You want? "*** I didn't answer the question instead I focus to other questions on the same song. ***"If I'm lost then how can I find myself? / If I'm lost now then how can I find myself again? "*** ***"I don't really know,"*** I answered. But maybe I should rekindle my faith, discover myself and find a passion. Maybe all of that. I don't know. ***"And how can I move on when I'm still in love with you? "*** this line from **The Man Who Can't be Moved** by **The Script** has been stuck in my head for ages. This has been popular in my country in the 2010's. Then I asked myself the question. Again, same answer, **"I don't really know. "** Maybe I've been in love so deeply so it's hard to move on. Then I remember that I've been single since birth. I need to stop imagining things. After **The Man Who Can't Be Moved**, another **The Script** song played. I asked myself the line from **If You Don't Love Yourself**, ***"How can you love if you don't love yourself? "*** ***"I don't really know."*** I think it's hard especially when you hate yourself most of the time. Maybe this is the reason I never fall in love. I already drank my entire cup of coffee and I'm still halfway trough my story. I'm hungry too so I cooked noodles. I'm dancing to **Taylor Swift**'s **Shake it Off** and **22** and banging my head to songs from **My Chemical Romance** and **Linkin Park** while I'm cooking and eating. No one will see what weirdness I'm doing during this time . I came back to my table after eating the noodles and I brought my coffee. The song I cried to once played. **Daddy** by **Coldplay** made me teary-eyed right now. And implying that I'm the one who is asking this line made me sadder, ***"Daddy, do you not care? / Is there nothing do you want to say. "*** ***"I don't really know,"*** my answer again. I don't know what he's thinking or doing but I miss him. I haven't seen him for years because my parents separated. Then **House of Gold** by **Twenty One Pilots** played. I remember my mother because of this line, ***"She asked me, 'Son, when I grow old would you buy me a house of gold? '"*** ***"I don't really know, "*** is what's on my mind. I don't know if I can,but I will try my best to be successful to lift my family out of poverty and buy what ever my mother wants,even it is a house of gold. When **Taylor's** **Back to December** played I asked myself the line from the song, ***"How's life.Tell me how's your family. "*** ***"I don't really know."*** I don't know what to answer. I love and hate my life at the same time. My family is okay but a broken family is not actually okay for me. The next song played is my favorite from **Maroon 5**–**Won't Go Home Without You.** And I asked myself as I sang along to the song,***"Why does this happen to me? / Why every moment have to be so hard? "*** ***"I don't really know, "***I answered in my mind. I want to know the answer for years. Why? **One More Light** by **Linkin Park** played and I asked myself the question taken from the song, **"Who cares if one more light goes out? / In a sky of million stars. "** Same answers as before, **"I don't really know. "** I don't know if people really care if I'm gone. I want to end my struggle at the moment. I've thinking of doing it since I sat here. I reached the cutter blade on the pencil holder. I ran my finger along the blade, it's really sharp. I've experienced being wounded by using it on my project before. I know this blade is a perfect subtitute. **Linkin Park'**s **Heavy** played after. The question in the chorus stuck in my mind. ***"I'm holding on./ Why is everything so heavy? "*** I just said to myself because I can't reach Chester's high note. **"I don't really know,"** my answer for the nth time. I am dying to know about it. I want to make everything lighter. Everything's so heavy to the point I'm giving up to carry everything. I wish this heavy feeling will end. Using the cutter blade, I sharpen my pencil. My handwriting is a little bit vague and thick because of the dull lead of the pencil. This is also made me write slower. I don't have a pencil sharpener so I need to improvise. After sharpening my pencil, I started to write again. I am almost finished. ***"Can we get up and try to feel okay again? "*** I sang and asked the question from the song **OK** by **Wallows**. **"Of course, "** I answered in my mind. This time 'I don't really know ' is not my answer. I am sure of it. I should just have hope. Finally, I'm done writing my story **Power of Music.** I yawned and I headed to my bed to sleep. I closed my eyes while smiling and hoping that I can get up tomorrow feeling okay again. Disclaimer : This is a work of a fiction. Thoughts, feelings and experiences of the character does not reflect the author's life. Some are real questions that I asked myself. But which are which? Who knows? This is my another entry for the prompt Questions of @JonicaBradley . I was inspired to write a fiction again that revolves around question after reading @kli4d 's Is it my fault?:An interview to the kid I adore. Check it out to miss your old self again. https://read.cash/@kli4d/is-it-my-fault-an-interview-to-the-kid-i-adore-91fe8949 Image Source

@Nyctofiles 3 July 2021

Used to be in Spam and Shazam! I'm Back Making Some Noise Half a year ago, noise.cash was introduced to us. Ain't Taylor but I was there and I remember it all too well. I remember that I got a notification while reading an article here in read.cash. This lead me to a another new website which I found amazing. It's like Twitter that I love to use for short posts but can earn Bitcoin Cash. Two things I loved mix in one site. The beginning of my journey here is just fine. I got tips from posting and interacting with others. When I started I'm happy with the cents I got because I know they will accumulate and become big in the future. I'm boring and uninteresting so did the noises I made. Because of I'm flopped, I usually got small earnings. So as day goes by, one of the Seven Deadly Sins took over my body. It's Greed. I started spamming some nonsense content and joined some giveaways and post about sub-to-sub thing. I also created some my competitions so I can earn tips and have people who follow me. These things I made turned into regrets now. I violated one of the rules so many times. I tried begging and posting some expression of complaint because I haven't received FT for days. Because my account was considered spam, I made another one. I read one article here in read.cash who was spammed in noise and made a new one. I don't remember the title and author, but he/she was the one who inspired me to make a new one. Then I stopped using it because I flopped more and my patience gone. I'm still posting in my original account mostly just promoting my articles written. Of course, there are still some senseless posts too. I've been still creating some noise in hope that my account will receive FT and will not be in spam anymore. But the hope is fading until it was gone. Because of this I focused more in read.cash. Just few days ago, my hope was rekindled. I've read an article of noise. cash user who was considered spam by the system and made it back. I was motivated by and learned a lot from @Zcharina22 's articles entitled Update to my noise cash account: R**eceiving** **...** and Yung Account kong naspam binalik after ome week... . https://read.cash/@Zcharina22/update-to-my-noisecash-account-receiving-001-instead-of-0001-eb0bc1f0 https://read.cash/@Zcharina22/yung-account-kong-na-ispam-sa-noisecash-binalik-after-one-week-salamat-noisecash-4afe69e4 I followed her tips. One of these is being active primarily by renoising. Another tip is interact with other users. I did it and got some hearts from them that made my heart happy. Then, I started to become more active and it worked. I am now receiving hearts from others. My noise are still nonsense though but I made them longer. And I limit myself from posting too much. Here are some of my latest noises: As you can see, I finally getiing some tips. And it was bigger than back then when I started using the platform. I haven't used to the changes in noise. cash yet. And still wondering about some of the changes and processes. I have a lot of questions. Anyway, what's really important is I'm back and now not in the spammed. And I learned a lot of things. Don't have Two Deadly Sins –Greed and Envy. Be contented from what we get and be happy for others. Also, we should think about our actions. Let's keep in mind the consequences and outcomes of our actions. If it's violating something, don't do it. I lost hope and lost some opportunities too. So we should never give up and lose hope. There is hope and we can recover in life and any circumstances.Just try again after trying. Check out my noise. cash account to make it more than 48. https://noise.cash/u/Nyctofiles Drop your username too. Again, thank you @Eunoia and @Corpsekunno for answering my questions. Your help had a big impact in making of this article.

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@Nyctofiles 3 July 2021

HELP! Paano po icopy yung link ng profile ko sa noise? Pwede ba yon? Salamat.

@Nyctofiles 1 July 2021

Thank you Sir @McJulez for sponsorship and appreciating my poem. God bless.

@Nyctofiles 1 July 2021

The Teachers TEACH, The Students CHEAT (Teach Yourself Not to Cheat) Are you familiar with anagram? It's a word formed by transposing the letters of another word. Some examples are the word *listen* formed from *silent* and *bare* transposing *bear*. And another example is the highlight of this article– ***teach*** and ***cheat***. Wordplay is not just the connection between *cheat* and *teach*. We can observe the relationship between the two in a classroom setting. There's a high chance we experienced it. Teachers teach us. They give lecture and provides school and home works and exams so students can learn. Meanwhile,there are still some students who lack efforts and resort to cheating. The Teachers and The Cheaters I've been studying for 13 years. In this timespan, I've met numerous teachers. They differs in various aspects. There are teachers whilo are good lecturers. They make their lessons more interesting with their own personal stories and experiences, and opinions about current events. Some teachers really makes a class fun and entertaining. They incorporates games into learning. There are teachers who are strict in classes. Probably they are the most feared and they can make students behave like they haven't used to. They can zip the mouth of those noisiest students. Some teachers never became late nor tardy. Filipino time what? They are really great at time management. (Mostly Math teachers. Lol) Teachers who just make the students copy what they are writing also exist. Then some are reading by the book. Others are rarely seen.Typically types of teachers that students hate. Teachers have differences like in terms of teaching style and attitude. But they still have things in common. One of these is having a student/s who cheat. My point here is, how good or bad the class is or how thw teacher teach, if the student is a cheater, he/she will cheat. These students cheaters are different too. Some are really intelligent, while others are not really. There are the lazy ones. Others are unenthusiastic in school. Some want to achieve more while others want ease at school. Cheaters have different reasons too: High scores, ease and comfort, laziness, reaching expectations, power, position, and you name it. Nonetheless, they are still the same. Cheaters are still cheaters. And I am one of them too. (And so are you?) I'm a Cheater, I Cheat Behind my awards and grades there is a dirty and disgusting truth. I've experienced multiple instances of cheating in school. I am admitting that I'm a cheater until now. I still remember when I cheated in Grade 3. I considered this one of the most grave one I've done. Mathematics is my weakness and hated subject ever since. So when I was in Grade 3 in a periodical test, I originally got 36/50. My scores in all subject are all 40+(no cheating happened) except in Math. So I want a consistent 40+ scores and also to maintain my Top 2 spot in the class. After I got my paper that was checked by my classmate, I immediately changed four wrong items to make them right. Then I told my classmate that he mistakes in checking my test paper. I pointed out the items that I changed then he checked those and changed my score to 40.He has no complaints because initially the teacher told us that every mistake will be subtracted to our own score. Finally, I got 40 trough cheating. My cheating worsens in high school as I become more lazy and stressed at school. I always copy my friends's assignment in Mathematics and copy their answers in every math tests. My reason is I hate and I'm weak at Math so I don't like reviewing in this subject. I'm even struggling during the class. Because I'm weak, I resort to cheating. There are times that I just played Mobile Legends instead of reviewing back then. As a result I don't know what to answer in the test, so I just copied my friend's answers. And in this school year amidst the pandemic, my cheating became worst. Back then, I mostly cheat on Math subject, my weakness. Now even on the subjects I like, I still copy my friends' answers on their module and asks Google. I'm am struggling and unmotivated to answer on my own. That's why I cheat. I'm was cheater.This may be hypocritical, I ***cheat*** but I want to ***teach*** something. TEACH Ourselves Not To CHEAT A person with regrets don't want you to be one like him/her. A drunkard don't want the younger ones to drink. A murderer don't want others to dirty their own hands. And a cheater don't want other to be a one too. What did I get from cheating? Aside from decent scores and grade, more time to play and for fun and comfort and ease, I got regrets, learned nothing and wasted potentials. I really had regrets. If I could, I would study more and harder in Math subjects aimce I was a kid. Now, I'm over thinking because I will be a college freshman nlext academic year and would take Engineering course. Because I used to cheat in Math classes, I almost learned nothing. And I know, in college I will struggle more because of my past mistakes. I just want to say that ***teach*** yourselves not to ***cheat***. If you cheated, you taught yourself to do it. So we can teach ourselves not to cheat. Before cheating know what good things it will bring to you. Ask your self if this won't be going to be your next thing to regret about. We can still achieve things without cheating and we will be prouder about our achievements. With cheating, some things will be more easy. But it is worth it if we can effort more? If we cheat, we can get high grades and scores. But, does it mean you learned? Whatever the outcome and the reason is, cheating is still cheating. We are not teacher but we can teach ourselves not to cheat. Are you a cheater? And for what? Do you have regrets about it. Share you experiences. Another week, anothr article from another prompt of @JonicaBradley. If you want to write something the prompt-***CHEATING.*** Just write with more than 600+ words, tag her and enjoy. I was confused what I should title so that's why I came up to nonsense like that. I'm struggling about the flow of the article. Besides, I don't have a draft right now, just typed what came in my mind. I'm not used to it. These explains the messy article. Yet, thank you for reading. Check out my other prompt articles: https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/our-differences-are-our-similarities-337eac10 https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/darkness-brightens-up-my-life-e4aa4b66

@Nyctofiles 29 June 2021

Judging the AI That Judged My Music Taste I hate being judge by other people. They judge others without any or with a little basis or even just based on their intuition,while most of them are dragging other people down. But if I was judged by an AI, it's a different story. There's a website featuring an Artificial Intelligence that can judge how '***bad***' your music taste is. The sophisticated AI will judge you taste in music based on the artists you're listening to and music, albums and tracks you've played recently. I stumbled upon this website since last bizarre year while scrolling through my social media. Since I love listening to music and I've seen other people's judgement on their music taste by the AI. I was dying to try it for it is intriguing, interesting and kind of controversial. Since then, I'm using it from time to time to determine the changes in the pattern of the tracks and artists I'm listening to. All you need to do is log in your Spotify credentials and answer some easy peasy questions. Then wait for the results. The AI's reaction, jokes and comments on my tracks and albums played while scanning and analyzing these is really hilarious. And so does about how it described how "bad" my music taste is. ***Find out how bad is your Spotify here:*** https://pudding.cool/2020/12/judge-my-spotify/ Don't worry, the site won't store your Spotify data. It's free, easy, safe and funny. During the Analysis I don't know what's funny about the songs from ***Taylor's 1989 and Reputation*** album. They're masterpieces. Of course I always listen to this one of the best songs of ***Twenty One Pilots.*** It's from my most favorite album from the musical duo. And it's really cool. Nice judgment AI! It's true that I've been listening to a lot of modern rock particularly on alternative rock and pop rock. Most of the time, I'm listening to ***Twenty One Pilots***, ***Waterparks***, ***Wallows***, ***The 1975*** and more inluding ***I DON'T KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME*** and ***half•alive***. Of course, there are a lot of ***Taylor Swift***. Taylor is my most streamed artists on the Spotify and belongs to my top 3 most favorite artists/band and listened to along side Twenty One Pilots and Wallows. I love her songs. ***Wallows*** is one of the bests indie/alternative bands out there worthy to stan. I discovered them just last year yet they're now one of my favorites. I've been listening to a lot of Taylor's songs lately because she's one of my comfort artists. The AI's reply to my answer really made me burst into laughter. I thought it was concerned. I also listen to ***Ghost***. I love their songs and themes. No homo. Don't mind what are my answers. I was shocked at the question the first I tried it. If I can I will definitely go to Coachella. Sadly, I am far away. It's the end, let's see the results. The Results Yeah,it was pretty good but the AI was not finished yet. It is really funny to me how it described how "bad" my Spotify is. I really like how it describe what I listening to based on the artists and album. *****tay-tay fangirl***** ***–Taylor Swift*** *****cottagecore********- evermore*** *****has-a-1975-tatto***** ***- The 1975*** I've been listening more to The 1975 lately so that's why, it's there. I don't understand the artist /music being described on the first two. May be the second is one is for the artists that have big fans in the stan twitter like Twenty One Pilots. The adult-skateboarder description is I think for pop punk musics. I love listening to this genre mostly to the modern ones. The last description is a crime. Listening to The Scientist won't make my Spotify bad. This song aged like a fine wine. Actually, I was surprised by this and I don't like it. Even my favorites from Taylor is not there. I think, it happened because I don't have a playlist of my own and I was listening to the artists' playlist. And I was really listening to Taylor most of the time. I'm obsessed listening to them. Especially to Taylor Swift, Twenty One Pilots and Wallows. I don't really listen to mainstream pop artists except Taylor Swift, who's not a garbage. I know it's just a joke so I don't bother. It' true I got some original music because I listen to some underrated artists I've discovered. Not totally true but I really listen to some new stuff. But still, I love some music from early 2000 like from Linkin Park and Green Day and from early 2010 up to know like music from Taylor Swift. I really agree as long the thing we listen to makes us good and happy is what really matter. This is for fun only. Anyways I won't accept what the AI stated. It will become ***tay-tay- fanboy- cottagecore-has- a -1975 -tattoo-good,***as it should . Please keep in mind these: According to the website, this is a satirical project and does not use real artificial intelligence, but a faux pretentious music-loving AI. The code creates a custom blend of jokes from our database paired with the insights found in the artist, album, genre, and track data from your Spotify. This project does not save any Spotify data. When you log-in with Spotify, it creates a special, one-time code to read your top songs and tracks, as well as recent playlists. That access goes away until you come back. From what is stated in the website,the AI will know what's good because it was trained on a corpus of over two million indicators of objectively good  music, including Pitchfork reviews,  record store recommendations, and  subreddits you've never heard of. **I'm excited to know what's verdict about yours. Share them in the comments. Also, what's your thoughts and opinions on my music taste. Let's talk about music.** All photos are my own screenshots.

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@Nyctofiles 28 June 2021

'Difficult Person Test': How Difficult Am I To Get Along With? Facebook posts here, and IG and FB stories there. Tweets here and links posted there. I've seen the '**Difficult Person Test'** everywhere. The said test intrigued me and piqued my interest and curiosity. As a result, I took this test too just like the others. Take this test too. I have characters and traits that people like and love. Obviously, there are also that people around me hate or dislike. I am always trying to be the best version of myself so I want to know my toxic and negative traits to change or even just lessen. I was excited to take this test to determine my toxic traits that makes me difficult to get along with. And also knowing myself better and seeing things with in me that I'm not aware of. It just took me a minimum of five minutes. I just answered 35 questions by rating/indicating how well these applies to me. **The Results** **DOMINANCE** As what the website explained, dominance is the tendency of talking down to others and putting airs of superiority. Those domineering people really wanted to be seen as leader and always react with combativeness when things don't go on what they like or when they don't get what they want.By meddling in others people's affairs and attempting to control the decisions of people around them, they often cause frustrations to others. I got a semi low score here because I'm domineering just seldomly. I don't want to be seen and be a leader because I hate too much responsibility. But I always react with combativeness when I know that I'm right and if my idea is good for the team and these don't go accordingly. Lastly, I don't really interfere with others' affair and control their decisions but I give my suggestions. **RISK-TAKING** According to the explanation on the website, risk-taking is the inclination to the engagement in risky behavior for the sake of having and experiencing thrills. Individuals high in this trait impulsively search sensations to overcome boredom and often get pleasure from shocking people around them with their stunts and adventure. Risk-takers'actions may have consequences for others and also for themselves so they always make people around them ill easily. If it's risk-taking in terms of opportunity, it's a yes for me. But if in terms of thrill and sensation, I'm hesitant. I still got a score in this facet because I still love adventure and thrill. If I know that there's bad consequence, I won't go for it. **MANIPULATIVENESS** From what is stated in the site, manipulativeness is the propensity to exploit others for own benefits. Manipulative individuals take other people for granted and using them to achieve their own wishes and goals, thinking little of interpersonal reciprocity or the right of others. They give little in return for the service, efforts and favors they get from others, making other people exhausted and frustrated. I was surprised that I am little manipulative based on the result. I was surprised because I always give back other people's effort, time and help given to me and I even mede these much bigger. Besides, I hate using people because I know what it feels like to be used and I want to achieve something on my own. Maybe I got this score because I like mutualism with other people and some times I think that people whom benefited on me, should give me benefits too. Lol, I know it's toxic and changed it already but still I have open hands to others even I won't get something in return. I am a walking contradiction. **GRANDIOSITY** As what the website described, grandiosity is having grandiose sense of self-importance and the thought is one is better than others. People high in grandiosity often tout their abilities and abilities while downplaying the contributions of other. These individuals tend to put themselves on the pedestal and have a sense of entitlement about them. The quite high/low results is I think because I'm grandiose sometimes. Seldomly, I have this trait especially if I'm very proud of something I achieved especially in competitions because I defeated others. But most of the time I'm not like this. I never thought that I'm better than others because I know we're good at our own besides I'm insecure of others'quality and skills. **CALLOUSNESS** In the website, callousness is characterized by lacking empathy or concern for others. People high in this trait typically have deficits in genuine social sentiments and make others feel uncomfortable by being coarsely uncivil. Not gonna lie, I'm callous especially if it's about drama or something that will put me in trouble and conflict. I want to be peaceful so I lack empathy and concern about these things. But if talking about other things, I'm still empathetic especially to the people around me and concern and don't make others comfortable(I guess). Most of the time, I'm sadden and feel empathetic to the elderly selling vegetables in the side walk to the point that I want to buy what they're selling if I had the money. So I'm not that callous. **AGRESSION** From the website, aggressiveness is the proneness to act and behave rudely and with hostility towards other people. If combined with callousness, aggressiveness may be more hurtful to others because aggressive individual may thus be both intimidating and unfeeling in their behavior. I'm aware why I got my score and I think I deserved it. I am easily annoyed and become angry even from such simple matters like loud chewing and excessive noises. I agree that I'm sometimes intimidating. I don't hurt others and even objects because of my aggressiveness, I often bottle up my feelings and just write it down( Fun fact: My notes in the phone is full of curses when I'm angry). **SUSPICION** As what is explained in the website, suspicion is the tendency to harbor strong and unreasoning distrust of others. Suspicious people always question and doubt the motives of even those who act loyally toward them. These kind of individual are always reluctant to open up to others and may be interpret kindhearted gestures as attempts to deceive them. I got a high score in this and I really know why. One reason is I'm not really used to kindhearted gestures and thing by other people that I'm nit closed with so I interpreted it to something negative. Another is I'm always loyal and really value relationships and frienship with other people so I hate betrayal thus I'm always suspicious. I agree that I'm reluctant to open up. ***I'm a very difficult person to get along with, with a 65%.*** Overall,I still have characteristics that made me easy to deal with. The test was just based on the seven key characteristics and factors that may define difficult people. So it is like seeing a one side of me. This test is for educational purposes only and do not provide proffesional assessments. Besides, this is not perfect. So the result about me might be right or wrong or something in between. Try this test too! https://www.idrlabs.com/difficult-person/test.php Why? It's free, easy and fast. You don't need to sign up or register and pay anything to be allowed to take the test and obtain the results. It's clinically oriented and made by professionals. The test was made by professionals with psychology and individual differences research. The feedback and result delivered by this test is based on the work of Ph.D.s and designed to deliver a clear clinical picture of the respondent’s current characteristics indicating antagonism as measured according to standardized items. Also, this test can make you know and discover your self more. With this, we can screen and determine our bad behavior and fix it. Share the results in the comment too and what's your opinion about it. I am curios about that.

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@Nyctofiles 27 June 2021

Ask me anything about me and my read. cash journey. I will make a 'Q and A' article for my anniversary here in read. Parang vlogger lang HAHAHAHA

@Nyctofiles 25 June 2021

Things I Miss From My Childhood "Wish we could turn back time to the good old days" -Stressed Out, Twenty One Pilots https://youtu.be/pXRviuL6vMY I woke up because of the loud speakers of our neighbors blasting music. Most song are nostalgic–songs I grew up to such as some Justine Bieber's songs and Taylor Swift's. These remind me of my childhood which I really miss. The result is me reminiscing and writing an article about what I miss from my childhood. When we are still kids, we wished to grow faster and become a grown-up. Now, we're already adults, we wish to become a kid again and to stay young. I'm stressed out of growing up. Even though I was just 18, there were so many responsibilities, things that are bugging me, dramas, problems and struggles. I know there are more the adult life could offer. Thinking about it is overwhelming. Comparing the things said above to our childhood life, there's a huge difference. When we're young, our responsibilities were just our household chores. The thing that bugged us is the question '*why the moon is following me?* '. Our drama in life was just '*di na tayo bati*'scenarios. Our problems and struggles were just simple like choosing what to buy in the store and balancing the dipper full of water in our heads when taking bath. Reminiscing about our childhood made me miss it more. So here are the things I miss from my good old days: One-Peso Dilemma Choosing is not a piece of cake. It's a struggle especially if there are numerous options and you like all of them I know I'm not the only one who had a one peso dilemma. Back then, while on my way to sari-sari store with one peso, I am thinking what should I buy. Then, when I finally reached my destination, I will still stand at the front of the store looking at the goods displayed and still thinking what to buy. There were so many options from chips like *Tattoos,Sweet Corn, Lechong Baka, Cheep 'N Chips, Kiss, Bangus* and more. Also among the candies and sweets, there are bubblegum with tattoo, *Hany*, *Polvoron*, candied tamarind, chocolate coins, chocolate that looks like a medicines and such. There are also some inedible things like plastic balloon and balloons. With one peso coin, I can only buy one thing among those multiple choices. In the end, I always buy my favorite junk foods namely *Tattoos, Sweetcorn, and Kiss.* The reason I got UTI. When I have money more than one peso, I still have this dilemma. When buying, I still spend only one peso and go home. Then, when my food was already consumed, I will come back again to the store only spending one peso and having the dilemma of choosing. The cycle repeats until all my money was spent. So if I have ten pesos, I will go to the store ten times. Because of this the store owner is always annoyed. Now, I miss eating the food I mentioned earlier especially the *Kiss, Bangus* and *Lechong Baka*(it used to have a packet of vinegar). I rarely see those here in our province in Visayas, unlike when I was still residing in Cavite and Paranaque. Do you have the same struggle as mine? What are your favorite '*chichirya*'? And what you used to buy in the store? Afternoon Nap Afternoon is kids' nap time. It's one of the things children hate. They said, sleeping in the afternoon makes us taller. But all I get is gound (*muta*) and salive that dripped when I slept. I used to sleep back then, yet I'm just 5'4". Anyway, I still miss this thing. After we woke up, there's snack waiting for us like hot bread and orange juice or biscuits partnered with soft drinks. Sometimes, our parents gave us money after we woke up. These things are my motivation to sleep in the afternoon. There were times that my older brother and sister and I will fake our sleep. We are just talking quietly and fighting so we won't get bored. Also, we put salive on the side of our mouth to make our sleep more convincing and mimic the way we look when I really slept. I know, we're disgusting. Then sometimes, I just faked my sleep by just closing my eyes but later on I will fall asleep. Of course, there are multiple times we snuck and fled out the house so we can't sleep. The good thing was more play, on the other hand, there's no snack and scolding. Does sleeping in the afternoon effective for you? And what are your tactics for faking your sleep? Sources of Income Even we're kids, we find ways to earn money and some times there's job offers from our parents. I've experienced plucking white hairs from my parents, for 50 centavos each strand. Also, beard hair from my father and armpit hairs from my mother for the same price. If I had head lice and nits, my mother would like to hand pick those parasitic organisms. Doing this hurt my scalp so I ran most of the time. But when my mother offers me five pesos, why not? What an easy money besides it's for my own good. This one is the most enjoyable for me–collecting and selling junks. While carrying a sack or plastic bag, I'm wandering trough the neighborhood. I was collecting plastic bottles, cans and scrap metals along the road or in the empty lots. If I accumulated enough, I sell those to the junk shop. Then my money will go either in my piggy bank or having a dilemma in the store. How about you? How you earn money when you're a kid? Outdoor Games Our childhood won't be complete without outdoor games. It's now part of my life as the scars in my elbows and knees. My favorite outdoor games are *Tagu-taguan/ Bamsak* (hide and seek), *Langit-lupa,* and *Habulan*(tag). I also loved playing *Luksong Baka at Tinik, Tumbang-preso* and more. There are also some games that I love that were stereotyped '*for girls only.'* I enjoyed playing *Chinese Garter, Piko,* and *Ten- twenty* back then,even though I'm male. Have you experienced going home when you're the tag in hide and seek? Or tried hiding in your own house and negotiating with the tag when you're the one found first by telling where the others are hiding? Have you experienced saying '*taympers*' the moment before the hand of the tag will have contact with you? I know that I'm not the only guilty about these. What are your favorite childhood outdoor games? Do you have many scars because of playing? Childhood Friends In our childhood, we have friends that share this moment with. I miss those friends I played and have fun with. Because of one childhood friend, I learned how to bike by borrowing his. There is also a childhood friend, that I had fist fight with so I learned that I should never fight. My childhood friends have impact on me. Sadly, I'm always moving from different provinces so I lost in touch with others. On the bright side, I have friends in different places. Are you still friends with your childhood friends? Do they have an impact on you? Do you miss them? Growing up and being adult is not easy. We have responsibilities,things to be worried about, conflicts, struggkes and problems. So sometimes we just want to be a kid again. We just want to be in our childhood again. Thinking about this made me miss my childhood and some things about it like my one peso dilemma, afternoon nap, sources of income, outdoor games and childhood games. One article is not enough to write about the things I miss from the good old days. So there's gonna be a second part soon. How about you? Do you want to be a kid again? What are the things you miss from your childhood? Currently, I'm stressed out and want to experience childhood again. I'm not Twenty One Pilots, but I wish we could turn back time to the good old day. ©Unsplash

@Nyctofiles 24 June 2021

Countless Questions, One Father `Writing Prompt # 5-Questions` Disclaimer : This is a work of a fiction with a slice of my reality. All events are product of author's imagination and inspiration from experiences. My mind is filled with countless questions and memories , right now. Since I was little, I always ask questions to my parents especially to my father. Definitely, I'm a Papa's boy. These questions and the answers had a big impact to my life. Some questions are the stepping stones and foundation of my learning. Those simple questions with answers that I can use later in life. "What color is it? " I asked while pointing on my shirt. I learned that it was green, my favorite color. "How to draw a rocket? " the question came out of my mouth while there were pencil and paper in both of my hands. Then,he draw one so I can copy. This thing my favorite thing to draw because of my dream of being astronaut. "What's next after number ten? " I asked my father so I can continue counting higher than ten. Some questions are out of curiosity. Those questions with answers that will satisfy my curiosity, at the same time, feeding me knowledge. "What are they doing and why? " my question when I was a young boy,my father took me to the city to see a marching band. I learned that it was a fiesta and it was my first time seeing a parade so I was really curious. "Where does the sun go when it sets? " I asked because I wondered about the sky and celestial bodies. "How I was made and born? " it's a question that made him burst into laughter and answered nothing. I learned the answer in school. Some questions not just gave answers but also a time for bonding. Those questions with answers that made my relationship with my father stronger. "How to make a kite? " I asked because my friends have their own and I want to play too. Then, we made a kite together while I'm the assistant. He also taught me how to make it fly. "Can you make me a wind vane and anemometer for a school project ? " I requested because it needs little carpentry skills and I might hurt myself if I did it alone. As usual, I'm the assistant in making of this project. Some questions are made because of concern. Those questions indicates love, care and concern. "Are you okay, Pa? " I asked my father when I noticed that he didn't wake up in the same time he used to. His head ached so I bought Paracetamol and massaged his head. "Why are you keep on drinking? "my question after he told me to buy another bottle of his favorite gin after finishing one. He thought I'm disrespecting him so he hit me with his leather belt. I was just concerned because drinking has been his vice for years and it can harm his health. Some questions are made too seek entertainment or entertain. Those questions can bring fun, laughter and entertainment. "Can you tell us about your horror experiences ?" I asked after the feature show with Halloween special ended. I and my friends, whom I was together with watching, are carefully listening to my father's stories. He told us about his experiences with aswang in his home province and other ghost encounters. He also share some urban legends in his province like Maria Labo. "Are you an ice cream? " I asked so I can deliver my punchline and roast him. This was the time we're pick up lines were common. He asked why and I told him that he's a 'rocky road'. It's our inside joke about the deep acne scars he has. He has his own pick up lines for revenge too. Some questions are vital and have a big impact on oneself . Those questions have answers that can affect someone's decision or future. "Where am I going for college and what course? I'm not sure what to take," I asked him. He told me that he's not the one to decide. My father advised me to follow what my heart desires and my dream. I was inspired by his answers so I decided to study Astronomy. Some questions are essential and can have big impact to others. Those questions have answers that can affect and impact other people?" "How to court someone? " even I'm shy to talk about it, I asked my father. He gave me answers and advices that we're really helpful and seems effective. "How can I fix my relationship with my fiance? "I asked my father because I was seeking for advise. I didn't want my relationship turned into ashes. His answered help me and now I'm married. "What I need to do to become a good father? " my question I asked when the moment I knew my wife was pregnant. Now I think, I became one not just by his answers but also actions since I was young that I've observed. Some questions are not able to be answered. Those questions can't be answered yet we still asks. "Pa, why did you left us too soon? "I asked my lifeless body of my father I'm huggging in the hospital bed. I asked even I know that he won't answer. My tears are flowing, my chest is heavy and my mind was full of memories and questions. Another week, another prompt from Miss @JonicaBradley. What a perfect prompt, it's broad that I can write more than one article, I think. Thank you for this. If you want to try writing about the prompt and enter the prompt challenge,just write and visit her articles for more details. Another flash fiction again that came up in my mind because of the amazing prompt. It's also inspired by the recent Father's Day. It was very personal because ut contains some of my personal experiences. Here's my other articles from prompt challenge: Prompt # 3- Similarities Our Differences are our Similarities https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/our-differences-are-our-similarities-337eac10 Prompt #4- Darkness Darkness Brightens Up My Life https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/darkness-brightens-up-my-life-e4aa4b66 Other flash fiction: Dreams as High as the Stars https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/a-dream-as-high-as-the-stars-c7e54bf5

@Nyctofiles 21 June 2021

'I Swear I Don't Love the Drama, It Loves Me' https://youtu.be/dfnCAmr569k "I swear I don't love the drama, it loves me. " -End Game, Taylor Swift We are not living in a utopian world. In our life, there will be always dramas. There will be moments that we'll come across conflicts, quarrels,and fighting even we try our best to avoid these. Our life is full of dramas. The word '***drama***' has a variety of definitions. But in this article, I'm referring to drama as defined by ****Merriam-Webster Dictionary**** as *a state,  situation, or  series  of  events  involving  interesting or intense conflict of forces.* I think based on my interpretation , Taylor is also referring to that in the song. I'm a person who really want to have inner peace and peace between other people. I want to leave a peaceful life. That's why I don't love the drama. I'm careful in my words, actions, reactions. I'm trying to avoid being involved in a conflict, quarrel, and fight. But the drama seems love me, it keeps following me even I avoid it. Drama within the family Drama finds its way to enter a home. We can't avoid having conflicts, arguments and fight, big or small, between family members and relatives. I'm a quiet person and I don't talk a lot in our home. Besides, I'm aloof too. With these behaviors, I kept myself away from drama. If I'm not wrong, I'll speak for myself. I can admit that I'm wrong if I am;when I'm not, I'll gonna defend myself. With this attitude, it seems that I'm attracting drama. I'm always patient and understanding in our house. Most of the time, I always keep my mouth shut even I hear some not-so-good things about me. Yet, I still caught in dramas notably with my grandmother. Hear me out, but before that let me give you a little background. Unlike my younger siblings who grew up with our grandparents from mother's side, my older brother and sister including me grew up with our parents. Due to circumstances, I moved and currently living with my grandparents. My mother is working in a far province and my older siblings are old enough to live with their own. Because of the pandemic, I spent all my time indoors, unlike back then that I need to go to school most of the time. With that I have more interaction in home so does the tendency of a drama. There are moments when I lost my patience and get easily annoyed. I spoke for myself that leads to an argument nd conflict. The recent one was started because of just a simple thing–my own clothes. My own clothes that I washed had been on the clothesline outside for a day and half. My grandmother told me that I should gwt those because they have been hanging for too long outside and already dried in an unpleasant tone. So I told her that those are not dry yet because of the cloudy weather and those would not still be there if they are already dried. In fact, I already collected those dried ones and folded them. She don't like how I spoke, I think. Then she started rapping and cursing me and I'm already shut my mouth to avoid it getting worse. I respect her because she is my grandmother, older and I'm residing on their house. But it seems I might be disrespectful by speaking up against her. Drama loves me and follows me not just by involving me but also by happening it around me. Even I'm involved or not, if the drama is still around me, I hate it. Thus,I still avoid myself to be involved in others'drama. Just like the drama with my older sister and grandmother.To be honest, I don't like having sides and I just want to be in peace. Anyway, I guess they really hated each other since my sister was still younger. To be honest they have almost same attitude so they clashed and besides my sister is really disrespectful, even using a curse words against my grandmother. Now,after years passes and multiple fights, they still have bad blood. There are more dramas around me within the family because I've experienced living with different relatives but those gonna make this article super lengthy. I just want to say that drama is always around me within the family. Drama between friends and more I really value friendship and I don't want to ruin any with a drama. I'm not always directly involved but I'm always in the middle between friends' drama. When my friends especially those who are in the same circle have conflict, I'm always in between. I don't take any sides and I try be the bridge to their peace. I don't really like to be in between my friends. There are times that they seem to make you choose between them. I remember when I was in elementary school, my two best friends had a fight and stopped talking. Then there's a time that the other one wants me to accompany him to the canteen while the other is to the comfort room. Of course, I didn't want to choose between so I told them that I was ordered by the teacher to clean something. Gladly, days later, they are back to best friends again. But not all friendship always turned back to what they used to. Just like what happened between my friends recently. My friends already stopped talking for a certain serious reason. I respect them and I understand each side. I'm still friends with them. But I guess, one side thinks I'm joining a side and back stabbing him/her and to the other side or the other way around. There are more dramas around me among my friends,big and small. But also there are dramas around me between schoolmates, classmates, strangers, neighbors and more. But to avoid myself to be involved in a necessary drama, I learned not to care about what other says or think about me. It's a good way to avoid myself being in a conflict or fight. Drama is everywhere and can happen between anyone. I want to be peaceful and avoid myself to be involved in a conflicts, quarrels and fights. But there are times that I can't avoid these so I've been experienced to be involved or to be around in a drama with my family, friends, strangers, neighbors, schoolmates and more. I'm not Taylor Swift but I swear I don't love the drama,it loves me. You might already know that really love listening to music. I really appreciate a song's lyrical content and I always pay attention to it. Some lines stand out and ignites a new idea. So why not use it as basis of my topic especially when there are times I don't know what to write . Additionally,it can be my form of music recommendation too. So check the song out.

@Nyctofiles 19 June 2021

Darkness Brightens Up My Life `Writing Prompt #4-Darkness` I've changed the community so I unpublished it and published again. Sorry for annoying notification. "Darkness brightens up my life. The dark is not always dark. -Nyctofiles the Great Another contradicting and confusing title and line right? Just like my recent propmt article Our Differences Our Are Similarities. To challenge myself, that's what I'm going to do with the prompt challenge. Besides, I love playing with words. https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/our-differences-are-our-similarities-337eac10 I've read numerous articles about this fourth prompt. Given that the topic is Darkness, it's obvious that most themes of those articles are dark. So I decided to make a light one. ***How do you define darkness not just being the absence of light? What's darkness for you? What do you feel when you're in the dark?*** Darkness is always affiliated to evil, negativity, death, fear and more negative connotations and similes. But for a Nyctophile–*a person who loves darkness and night*, just like me, darkness is not just an ordinary absence or lack of light. I still remember what my favorite hero in Mobile Legends says even I haven't played for a long time. ***"The darkness can also be a friend. " -Alice*** Darkness brightens up my life. It's not always dark. I always affiliate it with different positive things. Darkness can be a comfort Many are uncomfortable in the dark because of fear, past experiences and such. But for me, there's comfort in darkness. There are times during the day, sunlight seems irritating and uncomfortable. Aside from scorching heat, I hate something that's too bright. If you see me outside in a sunny day, I'm sure that ny eyes are squinting because of little sensitivity to brightness. Besides, I always feel dizzy to during the day because too much light overstimulates me. I'm not from a bloodline of vampires. I think I'm like this because I used to darkness. I can't really explain why and how I find darkness to be comforting. It seems magical, LOL. Maybe, because we are together with darkness from the moment we were born until we die. Darkness is our companion, from our shadows,the moment we close our eyes, and when the sun decides to sleep. Another, there's anonymity in the dark that can be comforting for some people too,just like me. There are friends whom you're comfortable with and those who dont. Darkness is a friend too that I'm comfortable with that others don't. Darkness can be a peace Comfort and peace always compliment each other. We're comfortable in peace and we're peaceful in comfort. I think, light is not always peace. I noticed that wars are always bright with lights coming from tremendous explosions, firing of firearms, and fires blazing. With that, I think that darkness can be a peace too. Did you notice,even it's dark when our eyes are closed in times we're praying or trying to sleep, it seems peaceful. I really love and enjoy when everyone is asleep in the middle of the night, there's tranquility. There's no irritating noises and overstimulating bright light. In my opinion, darkness including the night is peaceful. Darkness can be productivity You might already noticed and even knew it especially when you've read my introductory article, my name ***Nyctofiles*** is my own variation of the word 'nyctophile'. And personally means 'files' or written works I wrote in the night or dark. I'm a night owl. That's why I'm more productive at night and in the dark, not total darkness though, I have a dim light so I can see what I'm doing. I'm more creative and energetic in the dark and night. I do something productive at night such as finishing my school works and writing articles. Unlike during the day, I'm lazing around by watching anime or reading, still doing my chores though. In darkness and night, there's comfort and peace thus I'm more productive. Darkness can a reflection It happens a lot when I can't sleep in the midst of the night surrounded by darkness, I just think and reflect. I noticed that my ideas such as new topics to write are always generated in the night and dark. I'm not just more creative in the dark with new ideas. My mind during this time is more active and busy so I always think a lot and reflect. When my mind work better, reflection during this moment is better too. I always think about things I've done, my future and even my past. I'm trying to be better version of myself everytime so I love reflecting. But sometimes it leads to overthinking that always relieved by writing just like my poems written in the dark. From what I learned in Science class, reflection happens when light bounced back from a surface. Even without light, in the darkness, we can do a different reflection. In literature and writing, darkness is frequently linked to negative meanings like death, evil, and hopelessness and more. Darkness, the absence or lack of light, is not the same for everyone's personal dictionary. Darkness for me is a comfort zone. It's peaceful. A period of productivity. A moment of self reflection. That's why I love and appreciate it a lot. Darkness brightens up my life. For many, it can be traumatic and fearful. We are prone to danger in dark. We can't see things we're afraid of in darkness. I can't blame people who hates it because we have different experiences and environment. There's nothing wrong with it. How about you? What's darkness your you? Can you relate to me? This is my second article about the fourth prompt of @JonicaBradley . Hoping to write about the first two prompts too. You can join the prompt challenge too and enjoy! © Photos from Unsplash

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@Nyctofiles 18 June 2021

Our Differences are Our Similarities `Writing Prompt #3–Similarities` I haven't tagged by any, but I still want to participate to @JonicaBradley's writing prompt challenge. I know this topic is already late but I really want to write about this topic. If you haven't participated in this challenge yet , I tag you @wakeuplincs, @kushina, @kli4d , @Kageyama and @Viktor105 . ***"We are all different thus we are all the same. "*** We are living in the same planet. We're the same specie. We breathe oxygen and exhale carbon dioxide. We have blood that flows in our system. Humans have countless similarities and differences too. It might sound contradicting but one of our similarities is having differences. I love contradictions: we are different and we are the same. You'll understand it more after reading We are different As we grow up, we meet a lot of people. I noticed and we can't deny it, all people are not the same. We are different in countless aspects. ***Race, Language and Culture*** We people came from different origins, we speak different languages and dialects, and have varying cultures. I'm from Philippines, you might be from Nigeria, then she/ he might be from Indonesia, and others are from any country in this planet. My native language is Filipino and other people are English, Mandarin, Afrikaans and you name it. My country has its own culture such as the well-known 'pagmamano'and saying 'po at opo' while other country has their own too. These indicates that we have different races, languages and cultures. ***Sex and Gender*** Our sexual orientation and gender identity are not all the same. I'm straight, while others may not. Taylor Swift is a female and Chris Evans is a male. Halsey is bisexual while Miley Cyrus is pansexual. And other people have different sex and gender too because we are different. ***Spiritual Belief and Religion*** Every one does not belong in one religion. There are people who believe in God and also people who don't. I know people who are Roman Catholic, there are Born-again Christians,Muslims and more. Also, there are people who are atheists. People have different religions and spiritual belief. ***Social Class*** People are born in different circumstances and situations, and we have different amount of income and net worth. There are people who are multi-millionaire. Others are born in poverty and trying to escape it. We have different social classes. ***Perspective and Intelligence*** Everyone doesn't think the same way, have different beliefs, and view things differently. Our intelligence can be categorized from mental retardation to giftedness. We can have opposing opinions and beliefs because of our different perspectives. There are people who believe that the Earth is flat, while most of us are not. Our perspective and intelligence differs. ***Actions, Behavior and Habits*** Humans act and behave differently. Someone can act femininely despite being men, and others may seem childish even though they're already grown up. There are people who behave cold and others are too energetic. Also, we can have different habits and some might be weird for others. Each individual actions, behavior, and habits vary. ***Interest, Likes, and Favorite*** There are things that you're interested in, that you like, or your favorite which are not the same for other people. I like Taylor Swift and Twenty One Pilots while you might be into BTS and Blackpink. My music taste is alternative music, modern rock and pop punk but other people are Kpop and metal music. I'm interested in music and anime and you might be interested in literature and cryptocurrency. My favorite color is green and others are in any in the spectrum of colors. Our tastes differs and we have different interests, likes and favorites. ***Experiences*** Since the day we are born, we gain and collect experiences. You might always experience being on top while others are always underdog. Other's experiences still haunt them down even they want to forget these. There are people who experience ups or downs and highs or lows. We have different experiences. Not just those, the list continues. There are more countless things that differs among us. Indeed, we are different. We are the Same Despite our differences,there are still some things we are the same of. Having differences is one of these similarities. We shouldn't let our differences separate us. We are all the same, so we must unite and be one. We shouldn't let our differences in race, language and culture divide us. We are all existenting in this planet and we are the same having different nationality, language and culture so we should avoid racism, discrimination and ethnocentrism. Instead, we must have unity, cultural relativism and peace. We should keep in mind that no races, languages and culture are superior and inferior. The same with sex and gender, there's no superior one. We are born to discover ourselves and we are different in terms of sexual orientation and gender identity. With this, we should accept different genders, don't spread hate, and support each other. We shouldn't discriminate other gender including those who belong to LGBTQ community. There's no need to discriminate someone for being who they are and judging someone for doing different roles to someone's sexuality. We have our own beliefs and we are all the same having differences in terms of religion and spiritual belief. We should have mutual respect and understanding instead of judging someone for his/ her belief that is not aligned to yours. There are social inequalities, social stratification and separation because of our differences in social classes and status. We are all trying to survive in this planet and we are the same having differences in our social class so we must avoid the social issues said earlier to manifest. Discriminating and judging should be stopped too because people aren't born with the same circumstances. Another, our mind works differently and we are all the same having different perspective and intelligence. Our opposing perspective should not opposed us too. We should try to understand each other's perspective and keep in mind that if we're right doesn't necessarily mean others are wrong. And remember that intelligence is not the measurement of our value. We are all that act and behave differently and have varying habits. As long as these are not unethical, immoral and wrong, we should just keep our mouth shut and avoid judging people based on these. Let them be them. My taste is not always the same as yours because we have different interests, likes, and favorites. There's no superior one and let people enjoy things they're interested in and like. Avoid quarrels such as fan wars and judging others because his/ her taste is different to you. Lastly, our experiences accumulate the day we're born and we are all the same having different experiences. We shouldn't judge someone and invalidate his/ her feeling because of his/ her experience. We're not in the same shoe, so we don't know what they've been through. We have endless similarities with each other. We live in Earth. We are homo sapiens. We inhale oxygen and exhale carbon dioxide. We live and exist. Not just that, we are all the same having differences. So we shouldn't let our differences separate and divide us all. We should embrace our differences and accept these. And don't let negative things such as racism, superiority, judging, quarrel and more happen because we're different. Different or the same,be kind. Be a human. I'm back again. Thanks for reading. ©Photos from Unsplash

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@Nyctofiles 12 June 2021

Treating Myself: 'Salamat Shopee & Read.Cash' Last June 6 (6.6), online shopping platform giants like Lazada and Shopee had their mid-year sale started. Because of this, I have seen and read articles of other read.cash users about their online shopping hauls, particularly these two articles: @kli4d 's What did I bought from Shopee? and @kingofreview 's Shopee Haul #1: The Stationary Products (A Simple Review) . Check them out. My excitement for my order to arrive grew so does the idea of sharing what I bought in here after reading their articles. https://read.cash/@kli4d/what-did-i-bought-from-shopee-b5d44797 https://read.cash/@kingofreview/shopee-haul-1-the-stationary-products-a-simple-review-f18d0812 I and this article might be late because of long-distance shipping yet I still want to share this. I've been busy writing and publishing here these past few months. I am buying what I need with my earnings such as cellular load, school supplies, and my groceries that includes toiletries, snacks, and my must have–coffee ,etc. ,and saving money for future investments. I haven't shopped online for months maybe this is the perfect time for treating myself by buying what I wanted. A reminder for myself and for you from the lyrics of Twenty One Pilots' song Mulberry Street from their latest album Scaled and Icy: ***Keep your bliss*** ***There's nothing wrong with this.*** A Change of Heart On June 6,I uninstalled my Shopee app to avoid myself from buying and to save money. Hours later while buying my groceries at Puregold, I have one item that I need to buy but I don't have enough cash in my wallet. I remembered that I have PHP 150 (around $3) in my Shopee Pay wallet and that I can top it up with my money in Coins.ph app. I installed Shopee again, used the Shopee Pay feature for a cashless transaction and also buying all what I need to. Then, I received coins in my Shopee app that I can use as discount for future orders. I really like this ,so I think ,I'll use Shopee Pay for my transactions at Puregold in the future. Then the night came and I already went home. Because I had my Shopee app installed, I scrolled through the app. I had a change of heart so I made up my mind and decided to treat myself. What My Heart Desires One Piece is one of my favorite anime since childhood. I grow up watching it especially when I was absent or there were no classes. I really like it ever since even though today I haven't reached the latest story arc yet ans still on one-thirds of the series. I really love the collaboration of our local apparel line OXGN with One Piece. There are also other collaborations with other anime namely, Naruto and Sailor Moon. I already have some OXGN x One Piece shirts since last year and the same with facemasks. All I bought made possible by this site. The moment I saw the post of release of OXGN x One Piece Land of Wano Kimono on my Facebook newsfeed, I fell in love at first sight. My heart desires it since March. So last June 6,I checked it out including somw face masks too. My Heart's Judgement After six days of waiting, my parcel finally arrived yesterday. I am excited as a dog who's waiting for a stick to be fetched when I received the package. Now it's time for my heart's judgement. **OXGN Land of Wano Kimono** When I opened it, I was really excited to try it on me. Aside from the reason that I like it. I decided to buy it so I can use it for our Senior High School graduation pictorial. I planned to wear it under the *toga* but unexpectedly we are required to wear our school uniform. Besides, I want to experiment with my outfits. I used to wear just shirt and jeans since I was a kid. I guess, this is a good start. And it is limited edition so I want to have one before it becomes out of stock. ***Rate: 5/5*** 🌟 ***Review:*** What you see is what you get. I am more than satisfied when I opened it because it looks what I expected from the post earlier and pictures from Shopee. I really love their choice of color–black. The fabric is comfortable to wear not irritating but take note, it is not that soft because it is twill and also to maintain the shape. The printed designs seem well-made and I think it will last long so does the stitching that is great, in and out. It is oversized type of clothing so it seems to look much bigger for me because I chose a bigger size for me. I choose Small yet still look super bid for me. I know it's fault because I didn't checked the size chart carefully. The price is expensive especially for a student like me. It costs PHP 1,099 but it is totally worth it. **OXGN Facemasks** I also included some face masks so I have enough to wear everyday. Besides, they are on sale and I wanted to make my shipping fee more worth it by adding more items. ***Rate:4.5/5*** 🌟 ***Review:*** I won't give it a perfect score because the color seems unappealing yet the simple logo design is eye-catcher. But after all, it is just looks that don't really matter. I know that it won't cause pimples, and durable and will last longer. I already have some face masks ordered from OXGN, I'll base my review on them. I also used a same model of what I ordered but I already gave it to my younger brother. Since last year, I've been using disposable face masks which leads to my acne breakout. I switched to cloth masks to avoid *mascne* (acne caused by face masks) so buying OXGN facemasks is the best choice. Besides, these can help the environment by avoiding the use of single-use wastes. The face masks last longer than the usual cloth masks you can buy elsewhere. Even,by just tossing it on the washing machine when I wash my clothes, the elastic ear loops don't overstretch and the shape of the masks is still intact. Buying OXGN face masks is not a bad decision. These are environmently-friendly and face-friendly. Also these are breathable, last longer, and safe. The two face masks cost PHP 39 each with original price of PHP 199. The sale price of the product is also the reason I included these in my order.) Like what my one of my favorite Youtuber always says, about all of my order ,"***it is a thumbs up for me***." We must treat ourselves after our hard work and a lot of efforts. Buying what our heart desire is also a great option too, especially with the comfort of online shopping platforms like Shopee. I treated myself by ordering what I really like. It became possible with Shopee and Read.Cash ***Salamat Shopee!*** ***Salamat Read.Cash!*** Written by:Nyctofiles (June 13,2021) ©Photos taken from OXGN's Shopee and Facebook page. And some are my own. You know the drill:

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@Nyctofiles 10 June 2021

My Top 5 Songs That Left Me in Tears Music and songs are not just for our ears to listen and for our mouth to sing. But also for heart to feel thus making us elated, feel in love or heartbroken and even make our tears flow. I'm not a person who cries easily. I don't even cry when bidding farewell to the people I'm close with and being not able to see them for years and even to serious things in life like family problems. But not gonna lie, there are songs that still made me cry. In one heavy night and chest in difficult times, listening and crying to music made everything lighter. Prepare some tissues and lend your ears because here are some of my favorite tear-jerker songs: 5. 'Daddy' by Coldplay https://youtu.be/OWhiCkEY-Yk ***"Daddy, are you out there?*** ***Daddy, won't you come and play? "*** ***Daddy*** is single of British rock band ***Coldplay*** for their album ***Everyday Life***. The song has a slow beat with mellow vocals that can be viewed into three interpretations as explained by vocalist Chris Martin: the empathy of Chris as father for those people whose dads left; having kids and leaving them all the time; and lastly,the reason this song was written is learning about the prison industrial complex in America and outright racism is sketched in so many laws thus resulting to kids denying their own father. As someone from a broken family and who has a father far away, this song have me out of sorts and sobbing. The vocalist's calm and mellow voice and melody and the kinda relatable lyrics brought me into tears ,also special mention to the sad music video. Plus my life experiences made my eyes dry from sobbing. 4. 'One More Light' by Linkin Park https://youtu.be/Tm8LGxTLtQk ***"Who cares if one more light goes out?*** ***In a sky of million stars"*** ***One More Light*** is the ninth track and title track from American band ***Linkin Park***'s seventh studio album with the same name. It is the third and last single from the album. This later became a posthumous song for Chester Bennington. This beautiful song is heart wrenching. This song is different from most of Linkin Park's song, with no percussions and screams just a mellow and calming voice. Aside from the lyrics and the song itself, what makes me more emotional is the fact that the singer of the song, Chester Bennington died because of suicide. I wish he knew that there are many that care if onw more light goes out in a night of million stars. 3. 'Fix You' by Coldplay https://youtu.be/k4V3Mo61fJM ***"When you try your best, but you don't succeed,*** ***When you get what you want but not what you need"*** ***Fix You*** is a song of ***Coldplay*** from their third studio album ***X&Y***. This song was written by all of the four band members and released on September 5,2005 as a second single from the album . The song was inspired by the vocalist, Chris Martin's wish to continue helping her then-wife Gwyneth Paltrow through the grief after her father's death. Another Coldplay song in the list. The band is sure how to make their listeners cry. Aside from the mellow and soothing vocals and melody , and calming instruments, the lyrics can also make you burst into tears. The song seems talking to me and I feel that this song is about me. The lyrics is what I really need to hear so may be that's why this song made me emotional. 2. 'this is me trying' by Taylor Swift https://youtu.be/9bdLTPNrlEg ***"I've been having hard time adjusting*** ***I had the shiny wheels,now they're rusting"*** ***This is me trying*** is the ninth track from American singer-songwriter ***Taylor Swift***'s eight studio album and surprise album ***folklore*** released in the midst of the pandemic. The album is a "collection of songs and stories that flowed like a stream of consciousness "out of her imagination. ***this is me trying*** is a dream pop and orchestral pop written based on different narratives like a person dealing with alcoholism and other struggles; and the writer's own mental health in 2016-2017 when she felt 'worth absolutely nothing'. As a student who excels back then and now nowhere to be found, this song can be relatable. The song I can really relate to froms works of Taytay. Despite listening to 'this is me trying'all the time because it is one of my favorite Taylor Swift songs, there's still a moment that I cried to this masterpiece. I think, the sad and mellow melody of the song and the lyrics that hits hard made this song sad and worth crying for. This is me crying to this is me trying. 1.'Truce' by Twenty One Pilots https://youtu.be/eCeBNwBUkcI ***"The sun will rise and we will try again*** ***Stay alive, stay alive for me"*** ***Truce*** is the twelfth and final song from American musical duo ***Twenty One Pilots***' third studio album, ***Vessel*** (standard version). This song can be interpreted as hopeful message that life is worth living for especially for those struggling ones like people with depression and those who have suicidal thoughts. I think I'm okay yet listening to Truce makes me I'm not in a moment. Despite being not struggling, the song is still heartbreaking. Definitely, this song and band made me feel worthy. Additionally, watching the music video made it more heartbreaking by seeing Tyler Joseph with teary eyes singing— the man who struggled and tried to kill himself when he was younger is now the reason why others stayed alive. I know that most of the skeleton clique (fans) are emotionally connected to this song. A song that saved most of them. The lyrics. The piano. The calm song. The vocalist. The message. Everything about this song is tearjerker. Music is indeed a powerful thing. It control our brain to dance and bang our heads, to smile and think of memories and to let our tears flow. It all happened in one night, when I really want to cry but I can't. These songs came the key to release the heavy pressure in my chest. **How about you? What songs that made you cry? And what's your thoughts and opinions about this?** Other related articles about music from my ***'My Top'*** series: My Top 10 Favorite Albums https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/my-top-10-favorite-albums-8de1a498 My Top 10 Rock, Alt and Pop Punk Songs in May https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/my-top-10-rock-alternative-and-pop-punk-songs-of-may-may-song-releases-recap-170dd8f9

@Nyctofiles 7 June 2021

Filipino Toxic Trait: 'Ningas- Kugon' May New Year's resolution ka ba tulad ng '*magda-diet na talaga ako*','*mag- eexercise na ako araw-araw*', o '*mag-iipon na ako ng pera*' na nasimulan mo na at hindi na naipagpatuloy at kinalimutan nalang? Naging interesado ka ba sa isang bagay gaya ng pag-eensayo sa arts, pagsusulat, pag-aaral ng bagong instrumento pero nawalan din ng gana at interes no'ng tumagal at hindi na tinuloy? Kung oo ang iyong sagot, malamang baka isa ka rin sa mga taong ningas-kugon. Kilala tayong mga Pilipino at ang ating bansa dahil sa ating makulay at sari-saring kultura, sa ating asento na isa sa mga "sexiest accent" sa mundo, sa ating magagandang pasyalan at destinasyon, masasarap at kakaibang pagkain, at sa ating talento at kakayahan sa iba't ibang larangan na nakikilala sa mundo at marami pang iba Sa kabila ng mga ating magagandang katangian, mayroon din tayong mga hindi kanais-nais na mga kaugalian. Isa sa mga ito ay ang **ningas-kugon**. Ang Ningas-kugon Ang kugon ay isang uri ng mataas na damo na kung masunog ay malakas at mabilis magsiklab. Sa kabila nito ay mabilis din mamatay ang ningas nito. Ang pinagmulan ng "**ningas-kugon**." Ang ***ningas-kugon*** ay sosyo-kultural na ugali nating mga Pilipino (karamihan, hindi nilalahat) na namana pa sa mga mananakop na kung saan *masigasig lang sa isang bagay sa simula at mawawalan din nang sigla at gana kalaunan hanggang sa huminto o itigil ito.* Ang Aking Karanasan Mapa-saang probinsya man sa Pilipinas or kahit anong taon, simula pagkabata ay naoobserbahan at nasasaksihan ko na ang di kaaya-ayang katangian na ningas-kugon sa aking paligid, sa taong nakapalibot at malapit sa akin, at sa aking sarili. **Karanasan sa Aking Paligid** *Inabandona.* *Kinalimutan.* *Nakakawalang-gana* *Isinantabi.* Hindi ikaw ang aking inilalarawan sa mga salitang iyan kundi ang mga proyekto, aktibidad, at gawain na bunga ng ningas-kugon sa aking paligid. Kalimitan kong napapansin ang negatibong katangiang ito sa aking paligid lalo na sa mga proyekto paaralan at sa komunidad. Naalala ko noong nasa elementary school pa lang ako, kailangan naming gumawa ng plot para taniman para sa proyekto namin sa Edukasyong Pantahanan at Pangkabuhayan (EPP). Sa simula, ang buong klase ay alagang-alaga sa mga tanim at grabe ang pagbantay sa kanilang plot. 'Yong mga kaklase ko ay nagpapahapon pang umuwi para asikasuhin mga pananim nila. Pagkalipas ng ilang linggo, napapansin kong nababawasan na mga kaklase kong interesado lalo na n'ong may grado na kami. Karamihan sa kanila ay pinabayaan nalang ang plot nila hanggang mamatay ang halaman na gulay. May pagkakataon din noong nasa Junior High School pa ako, 'yong Youth for Environment in School Organization (YES-O) sa amin ay namumulot ng basura sa campus kada uwian araw-araw. Hindi rin tumagal, paunti-unti ang miyembro ng club na namumulot ng basura hanggang sa tumigil nalang din ang lahat. Noong nakaraang taon, sa simula ng lockdown ay may mga barangay tanod sa amin na gabi-gabing nagpapatrolya. Sinasaway nila o hinuhuli ang mga tumambay pa rin sa labas kahit lumagpas na sa curfew hours. Hindi pa umabot nang ilang linggo ay paminsan-minsan nalang hanggang tuluyang natigil nalang. Gaya nga ng sabi ng iba, sa una lang strikto ang aksyon ng mga otoridad sa pandemya. Ang mga iyan ay ilan lamang sa aking mga napansin na manipestasyon ng kaugaliang ningas-kugon sa aking paligid. **Karanasan sa Taong Malapit sa Akin** *Gitarang maalikabok.* *Alkansyang wasak.* *Files na na-delete***.** Ilan lamang sa mga bagay na nag-ningas ngunit di rin tumagal ang alab at namatay. "*Mag-aaral na ako ng gitara*, " wika ng aking kaklase. Inaral, nag-ensayo at pinagkaabalahan ang bagong instrumento. Kalauna'y nahirapan hanggang mawala ang interes at gana. Ang gitara ay napabayaan sa tabi hanggang ang alikabok ay namayani. "*Mag-iipon na ako ng pera,*" sabi ng aking nakababatang kapatid. Araw-araw naghulog ng piso, lima o tres. Hindi nagtagal, alkansya ay kanyang sinira para ang pera ay makuha. Hindi na rin muling nag-ipon, alkansyang wasak ay tinapon. "*Mag-aadvance study na ako,*"pahayag ng aking malapit na kaibigan. Nag-download ng review materials (PDF) na related sa kurso napusuan. Ang mga ito ay kanyang pinagtyagaan, binasa, at inaral. Nahirapan din at tumigil hanggang mga PDF ay binura. Marami pa akong kilalang malapit sa aking kinakitaan ko ng kaugaliang ningas-kugon na hindi ko kayang isa-isahin pa. **Karanasan sa Sarili** Kung may kumpetisyon lang ang pagiging ningas-kugon, paniguradong ako ang kampeon ngayong taon. Maraming pagkakataon na sa aking buhay na ako ay naging isang ningas-kugon o baka ito nga talaga ay aking personalidad lalong lalo na noong nakaraang taon hanggang ngayong taon. Ang mga sumusunod ay ilan lamang sa mahabang listahan. Kasalukuyang nasa Grade 12 ako kaya noong sa kalagitnaan ng 2020,binalak ko mag-review at advance study para mahasa ko ang kahinaan ko sa Matematika at maging handa sa kolehiyo. Maganda itong plano dahil mahihirap-hirap ang kursong Engineering na aking napili. Mga ilang linggo lang akong nag-aral at hindi na muling binasa ang mga libro. Noong lumabas ang noise. cash, sobrang aktibo ko pa doon. Pero habang dumadaan ang mga araw, nauubos rin ang interes ko. Itinigil ko ang paggikit nito na ngayong pinagsisisihan ko. New Year's resolution ko ngayong taon ay ang regular na pag-eehersisyo at pagkain ng masustansyang pagkain. Noong simula ng Enero, nag-jogging ako araw-araw mga anim na beses lang yata at hindi na naulit. Ganun rin ang nangyari sa usaping pagkain. Ang pagiging ningas-kugon ay kadalasan kong nakikita, kahit saan man ako tumira o kahit anong edad ko. Lagi ko itong naoobserbahan sa aking paligid, sa mga taong nakapalibot sa akin, at sa aking sarili. Ang Negatibong Epekto Ang ningas-kugon ay isa sa mga negatibong kaugalian nating mga Pilipino kaya malamang ay marami rin itong negatibong epekto. **Maraming Masasayang** Maaaring masayang ang iyong limang P: ang panahon, plano, pagod, proyekto at pera. "*Time is gold,*" ika nga nila kaya ang oras ay napakahalaga. Ito ay napakahalaga at hindi na maiibabalik pa kaya huwag dapat sayangin tulad ng pagiging ningas-kugon. Ang oras na inilaan natin sa isang bagay ay parang mapupunta lamang sa wala kung hindi naipagpatuloy o natapos. Ang oras na nasayang ay nagamit pa sana sa mas mahalagang bagay. Ang plano rin ay masasayang lamang kung hindi gagawin o ipagpapatuloy. Ang proyekto rin ay mapupunta sa wala kung hindi tatapusin. Hindi natin makikita ang resulta nito o kahihinatnan. Ang ating effort at pagod ay walang patutunguhang magandang resulta kung aabandunahin lang ang ating nasimulan. Ang pera ay masasayang lang din lalo na kung gumastos tayo sa isang bagay na sa kalaunan ay hindi na ipagpapatuloy o tatapusin. **Negatibong Imahe** Ang pagiging ningas-kugon din ay maaaring magdulot ng pagkatamad. At isa pa, ang ningas-kugon na tao ay hindi na mapagkakatiwalaan at aasahan ng ibang tao sa mga bagay tulad ng aktibidad at proyekto. Dahil sa negatibong kasanayan na ito ay maaaring magkaroon ng negatibong imahe ang isang tao na may marami ring negatibong kahihinatnan tulad **pagkawala ng oportunidad** at **hindi magandang relasyon at koneksyon sa mga tao.** **Matatagalang Gawain at Di Magandang Resulta** May mga bagay talaga na wala tayong magagawa kundi gawin ito tulad ng mga gawain sa trabaho o simpleng proyekto at awtput lang para sa eskwelahan. Ang mga bagay na ito ay hindi pa rin makakaiwas sa ningas-kugon. Ang nga gawaing ito ay hindi matatapos sa deadline kung sa simula lang masigasig gawin at titigilan din. Mapipilitan nalang ituloy dahil malapit na ang deadline at kadalasan ay nahuhuli pa sa pagpasa. Dahil din sa cramming at pagmamadali sa pagtapos ng mga gawain ay maaaring hindi maganda ang resulta o final product na ating ginawa. Ang Ating Laban Marami sa ating Filipino ang ningas-kugon pero marami ring paraan para iwasan at labanan nito. **Tumanggap at Magbigay ng Papuri** Kung tayo ay marunong magbigay ay tumanggap ng papuri, ito ay magbibigay mg motibasyon at lakas sa atin magpatuloy. Mahalaga ito para hindi mawalan ng gana at interes sa isang bagay upang matapos ang sinimulan at may mas magandang resulta pa. Purihin din ang ibang tao para magkaroon sila ng sigla at gana sa kanilang ginagawa. Kahit ang simpleng mga salita ay may malaking epekto. Kaya gamitin ito oara sa kabutihan ng iba. **Manalamin sa Epekto at Matuto** Alamin ang nagatibong epekto ng pagiging ningas-kugon sa ating mga gawain, sa taong nakapalibot sa atin, sa ating imahe at sarili. Manalamin sa mga negatibong epektong ito upang maganyak ang sarili na umiwas sa pagiging ningas-kugon. Matuto rin sa mga pagkakataon sa nakaraan na ikaw ay ganito o sa mga taong nakapalibot sa iyo na may ganitong kaugalian. **Alamin ang Sarili** Mabuting makilala natin ang ating sarili upang malaman natin ang ating interes, mga bagay na gusto at mahal natin, at ating lakas at kahinaan. Sa pamamagitang nito, maiiwasan natin ang mga bagay na hindi natin gusto o hindi pinagkakainteresan na magdudulot sa atin sa pagiging ningas-kugon. **Tamang Pag-uugali at Magbago** Hindi lang dapat ang pagiging ningas-kugon ang ating baguhin pati na rin dapat ang mga ugaling ugat at dahilan nito. **Maging disiplinado** **sa sarili.** Mahalaga ang disiplina para maging consistent sa ginagawa at maging malapit sa layunin. **Iwasang maging tamad.** Dapat tayong maging masipag para matapo natin ang mga gawain. **Maging Mas Matatag** Maraming hindi itinutuloy at tinatapos ang mga bagay dahil natatakot, nahihirapan, at hindi nakakakita ng progreso sa ginawa. Mahalagang hindi magpaapekto sa mga ito para maituloy ang ginagawa. Marami akong napansin sa site na ito na ningas-kugon. Sa unang sali palang nila ay ganado na sila magpost.Pero nang hindi nila nakikita ang progress gaya ng pabuya ni TRR, tumigil na agad sila dito. **Mahalin ang Ginagawa at Sarili** Mahalagang mahal natin ang ating ginagawa para magpatuloy. Kung mahal natin ang isang bagay, hindi tayo agad-agad mawawalan ng interes at gana rito. Mahalin din natin ang ating sarili para mas maganyak tayong maipagpatuloy ang mga bagay lalo na kung ito ay para sa ating kabutihan at kaunlaran. Ilan lamang iyan, marami pang ibang paraan para labanan ang ningas-kugon na kaugalian. Nakadepende rin iyan sa tao, sa sitwaayon at sa bagay-bagay. Marami sa ating mga Pilipino ay ningas-kugon. Marami itong negatibong epekto pero may mga paraan para iwasan at labanan natin ito. Ningas-kugon ka ba? Ano ang iyong mga karanasan tungkol dito? Ano ang masamang kinahinatnan mo at ng mga gawain mo dahil sa negatibong ugaling ito? At paano mo ito nilalabanan? Ito ang kauna-unahang artikulo ko sa read. cash na nasa wikang Filipino. Gusto kong gamitin ang wika natin dahil tugma ito sa paksa at ang sulating ito ay para sa mga Pilipino. Marami pa kayong dapat abangan sa usaping ito. Salamat sa aking mabait na sponsor @wakeuplincs dahil sa kanyang akda ay mas naganyak ako na isulat ito sa Tagalog. Salamat sa suporta! Isinulat ni :Nyctofiles(06/07/2021) ©Larawan mula sa Unsplash at Google

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@Nyctofiles 4 June 2021

My Top 10 Rock, Alternative and Pop Punk Songs of May (May Song Releases Recap) "Wake me up when May ends, " I said. It is now June and I'm back to bring you something about music and pop culture. From Green Day's Pollyanna to Twenty One Pilots'Choker.May is a month full of music releases. A month of full head bang, month of full dances,a month of sing along, and a month full of tears and joy. A month of rock, alternative, and pop pjnk songs. Definitely a month for headbangers. I might be late but here are my Top 10 Rock, Alternative and Pop punk songs released last month: 10. "If I Surrender"-Citizen Soldier https://youtu.be/HB7We-iDuC4 "If I surrender To the monsters in me Will it set me free? ***If I Surrender*** is a song from American band **Citizen Soldier** –a band who's making an impact through music for those fight battles everyday that others dismiss or judge them for. This song speaks for those struggling with depression and other mental illnesses, and those who have suicidal thoughts. It's about what they feel and think about themselves. I think, this song can give hope and inspiration for those having silent battles and empathy and understanding for those who are not. I'm happy that I discovered this band. Worth listening for. They're giving voice for those struggling and can't speak. A song worth sharing for everyone with its powerful message and vocals just like Citizen Soldier's every song. 9. "TIME 2"- half•alive https://youtu.be/rYInjpV75dY "Fighting the constant Forgetting to give it up ***TIME 2*** is the newest single from American band **half•alive** .The song was produced by three-time GRAMMY winner Ariel Rechtshaid (Produced some works from Adele, Vampire Weekend, and HAIM) and co-written with Dan Nigro (Olivia Rodrigo's Sour co-writer). TIME 2 is about "waking up in the chaos of life and remembering a child-like state of mind," as what the band describe this song. This band is really impressive. They sound unique and different with other artists. Also, they still have variety of music. TIME 2's lyrics and storytelling is superb. This song really implies what the band describe it to be. 8. "Violet! "-Waterparks https://youtu.be/I8vN_MmvL1I "And this ain't Misery But I'd break you knees To keep you here with me ***Violet!*** is a newest single of American rock trio **Waterparks** from their latest album **Greatest Hits.** This song is vibrant and upbeat that compliments Awsten's (the vocalist) vocals. The lyrics and music video is interesting and beautifully weird. The song is catchy too and can make you dance. 7."Amnesia "-MOD SUN https://youtu.be/YCYxPZhMmJE "I have no past when I see ya,amnesia You make me think of my future,I need ya ***Amnesia*** is a track from **Internet Killed the Rockstar Deluxe Album** of American singer-songwriter and rapper **MOD SUN.** I discovered and listened to MOD SUN just recently because of his song ***Flames*** featuring his girlfriend Avril Lavigne. I'm already hooked to this artist and his music. This song is one of my favorites from him. An emotional song with insane vocals. Pop punk is back! 6. "No Chances"-Twenty One Pilots https://youtu.be/8_tMRvpzDVc "We come for you No chances ***No Chances*** is the tenth and penultimate track **Twenty One Pilots**' sixth studio album, **Scaled and Icy.** The album is composed of vibrant and upbeat tracks, unlike this one. This song is dark and haunting and some parts may be eerie (the 'we come for you' lines. I noticed that this song sounds similar to their previous album Trench. I don't know what the lyrics really imply but it seems dark and intriguing yet have interesting story telling. I've got chills listening to this track from Scaled and Icy. 5."Broken Heart of Gold"- ONE OK ROCK https://youtu.be/hDy9BrB9_VU "Sometimes I just wanna say I love myself but not today ***Broken Heart of Gold*** is a new single released by Japanese band **ONE OK ROCK** last may 28,2021. The song is exclusively written for the live-action film **Rurouni Kenshin: The Beginning**. Just like the recent single released **Renegades**, this song is an official theme song for the said film. I really love this new song. With it's piano melody and ballad style,the song became more emotional aside from it's deep lyrics. It's comforting yet hits hard. Broken Heart of Gold is literally a gold. 4."Pollyanna"-Green Day https://youtu.be/CRjNx5kZSsg "It's wonderful to be alive And everything's gonna be alright ***Pollyanna*** is a surprise single released on May 17 by a veteran pop-punk trio **Green Day**. This song is their latest single that follows **Here Comes the Shock**,a single released in February this year. If 2020 has Twenty One Pilots' Level of Concer,this year has pollyanna from Green Day. Both songs can be out go-to this and about pandemic and quarantine . Pollyanna sounds different to the band's previous works. And so does the theme and lyrics of the song. This song is optimistic, uplifting and inspiring. No wonder, that the comment section of the lyric video released on YouTube is filled with people who found comfort, hope and inspiration on this song. Pollyanna is a song we need in these times. 3."good 4 u"- Olivia Rodrigo https://youtu.be/gNi_6U5Pm_o "Well good for you, I guess you move on really easily ***good 4 u*** is a third single from **Olivia Rodrigo**'s debut album **Sour**. This song is about an ex-lover who move on easily after a break up. This song debuted on No. 1 on the Billboard Hot 100 in the united States, her second number-one song after **driver's license**. 'good 4 u' is far Olivia Rodrigo's first two singles 'driver's license'and 'deja vu'in terms of vibes and style,not just genre. Olivia prove that she can be versatile in her art,yet still powerful. This song is the Gen Z's new post break-up anthem. The song is angsty and relatable just like the other track 'brutal'. It's a nostalgic-sounding song that blends pop punk, pop rock, grunge and teen pop genre. It's also heavily driven by guitar and drums,and it can definitely make you scream along in your room while dancing and banging your head while listening. I think, listening to good 4 u is good for you. 2. "love race"- Machine Gun Kelly ft. Kellin Quinn https://youtu.be/Ak_zGEhRlzE "I dont want to be without you But I'm here, screaming by myself **Love race** is a song by American pop punk artist and rapper **Machine Gun Kelly** that feautures vocals from **Kellin.Quinn, Sleeping With Sirens** vocalist and also features drumming of MGK's long-time collaborator, **Travis Barker from Blink-182.** Just like Machine Gun Kelly and Kellin Quinn's collaborations in the past like 'Alone'and 'Swing Life Away'. 'Love race' is a powerful pop punk song. The song is catchy, danceable and can definitely make you head bang. This song sound nostalgic too, like a theme song in a teen movie in early 2000. I love the harmony of Machine Gun Kelly's lower hoarse voice and Kellin Quinn's higher and thin voice and also the drum skills Travis Barker showcase. Love race is a song that you will love and make your heart race. 1. "Choker"-Twenty One Pilots https://youtu.be/2sBRnnnZyFw "Choking on the circumstance Self -sabotage is a sweet romance ***Choker*** is the second single of **Twenty One Pilot**s after ***Shy Away*** for their sixth album, **Scaled and Icy**. The song was released on May 1,2020(Philippine date and time,April 30 for some). This retro-sounding song id definitely my favorite song from their new album. This song was added to my playlist when I'm empty. As usual, Tyler Joseph's showcase his relatable and heart-hitting lyrical skill in this song . It seems like this song is written for me because I can really relate to it. This song is comfort and pain in a nutshell. This song might not be as catchy as the first single, but this is my go-to song. I really enjoyed music from the past month. The music I can relate to, make me head bang and dance secretly, and make me think and cry about the lyrics. This,June I'm hoping for more music relases especially in rock, alternative and pop punk genres. And I may write about June releases too, next month. How about you? What are your favorite music and songs from last month? Written :June 4,2021 by Nyctofiles

@Nyctofiles 31 May 2021

Poetry 101: Other poems written in my dark times You may already know it, I also write to express what I feel. It is my form of relief and expression. A good way to lighten my heavy chest and calm my overthinking mind. I already published my collection of poem written in my darkest nights. Poems written in silence, solitude and darkness. Read it here: https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/poetry-101-my-poems-during-my-darkest-hours-6a4962a4 The sun always sets, and then there's darkness. There will be always be a darkness in my life, so do poems to be written. Light and Foundation I can't see in this vast darkness, I dont know where am I heading, And what's in there I need to face . There is something that is missing, My guide in life journey–the light But now, it is not in my sight. I'm tired and close to my collapse, There is no support on my side, I might fall in a day or half. No thing to keep me up and guide, A tough support–the foundation But now, it is not in action. My parents are far away due to some reasons. This poem is about the what I feel when the light and foundation of home is distant and not around especially when it's dark and you feel no support. It's written last year, I'm okay now and don't feel something like this again. A Friend in Noises and Silence The noise is deafening, Annoying voices and people loudly talking. In a stressful and noisy environment, Music is God-sent. The silence is deafening, But my mind is the one shouting. In hard times and when I'm alone, Music is my comfort zone. My form of silence around annoying noises, My form of noise in lonely silence. When ears are plugged, heart will mend: Music can always be a friend. I wrote this one for music appreciation. I always listen to music to avoid the noise around me and to distract me sometimes from lonely silence. Music helped me a lot and kept me sane. Defective Green Thumb "What you sow is what you reap, " Same line uttered by different lips. So it makes me wonder, I planted the seedlings and gave care. Then, I harvested different or nothing, Maybe, my green thumb is not working. I planted numerous efforts, Why these are turning to failures? The same with my concern and care, I gained things I can't bear. I grew hard work and determination, But these turned to unappreciation. What I wish is what I planted but never received, My green thumb is defective. I wrote this poem because sometimes what we gave is not what we received. What we sow is sometimes not what we reap. It's sad because sometimes we don't get what we deserve. Random Short Poems i just got used to my favorite black coffee and my life and i just got used to both of their darkness and bitterness -nycto how can i move forward? it's dark, i'm stuck and tied and everything seems so heavy. -nycto i occupy space and I have mass, a matter but never mattered. -nycto These are just my random thoughts I turned into poems. I am not used to write this kind of poems so this was just my practice works. ©Photos from Unsplash **Poetry 101 series:** Read my other poems here: https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/poetry-101-my-poems-during-my-darkest-hours-6a4962a4

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@Nyctofiles 27 May 2021

I hate people who act like shadows. `Off My Chest Article No. 2` In our life, there are people that acts like shadows. They are present on our brightest days. And they disappear in our darkest nights or time. Now, you see them. Later, you don't. We don't need to be successful or experience extreme downfall in our life to determine and observe these shadows. We can still notice them with our simple achievements and failures. We can also deal with them in a good way. Shadow-free days Growing up, I used to join competitions in school. Sometimes, I win. Most of the time, I lose. At this time in elementary school, I am happy to live with people that are proud of me in my highest or lowest point. They are happy whether I'm part of Cream of the Crop or not. Still proud about my contests even I won or lost. And they are looking forward about my experience after I went home from a competition, winner or not. I always hear my name in my father's 'inuman'sessions with his friends–bragging me about my achievement or the contest I joined in where I lost. Also, my mother and other relatives I experienced to live with always talks about me to their friends. I always felt their support and appreciation. People around me that time do not act like shadows. Shadows around me appeared I transferred to a highschool in our province. In a new environment ans new people around, these shadows appeared. The moment I entered Junior High School, I became more competitive. I joined different contest that I'm interested in. I also became more participative in the class. In my early years in Junior High, I've joined contests in schools like spelling bee and others and district-level competition in quiz bee and journalism. I won some school-wide contests. People around me are happy for that. Then about my higher-level competitions,these same people only care about the result. When lost, they seemed uninterested and I feel unappreciated. I always defend why I lost like reasons that my opponents are too intelligent and such. As I grow older and gain more achievements in school, people's expectations became higher too. As years pass by,later in Junior High up to Senior High, these shadows became more prominent and can be hurtful too. People around me just care when I win or succeed. In my different contest, they are still the same. They were proud of and happy for me in moments I won. And then, they disappeared that made me feel unappreciated and not enough when I lost or failed. They can hurt me too. I remember when my grandfather asked me back then in Grade 10 if I am part of the top in class. I just said that I'm with honors and probably in 10s ranking. He just I am "pigaw"–I don't know how to translate it right but it means weak, frail, and feeble in our language. Despite having with honors, that is what I got. I am graduating so I'm taking entrance exams in college. They are happy and proud when they knew I passed the entrance exam in a military academy. I wonder, how will they react when I fail. Dealing with shadows In Grade 10 up to Senior High, I always keep my competitions a secret in our house. They will just discover that I won when I need to travel to other region or province just like in the case of Regional Press Conference in Campus Journalism and grand finals in my quiz bee competition. These past few months, when I take entrance exams to universities, I am hushed about it. And I passed them. Keeping my contests and important exams a secret is really helpful and relieving. There are no people that will expect too much for me that I can later disappoint when I fail. When I lose, I won't feel people's unappreciation and disappointment. A good way to deal with shadows is not knowing them whether it's a bright day or dark night. I also learned not to give an "F". Some times,we need to focus on ourselves to grow instead of focusing on what others say or feel. We know who we really are and what we can achieve. We need to learn to achieve something for ourselves too, not for others. We don't need other people's validation. One of the best way to deal with shadows is focusing on ourselves not one them. We can also learn from these kind of people. Use their criticisms for our growth and use them as an inspiration to prove them wrong or grow as a human. These people are part of our life and they will never be gone. So we can deal with them by using them as inspiration. I hate people who can only see us when we achieved something, we won or we became successful. They are present in our brightest days. Then, seemed to disappeare in our dark days. These people are like shadows. Growing up, I've observed many of them and I learned how to deal with them in a my own healthy ways. Now, I appreciate these shadows'. I am happy to share my brightest days to the people who really appreciate me in any circumstance and state I am in. Whether I lose or win, they are always there. They are light, making my darkest night bright and days brightet. How about you? Are there people that are like shadows in your life? How do you deal with them? Reminder: Support and appreciate your friends,family and loved ones whether they are in their highest point or lowest point and either on their darkest nights or brightest days. Don't be a shadows too, you can be their light. Off My Chest series are articles about things I want to rant or release from my chest. Hence the name. Off My Chest Article No. 1 https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/im-anxious-about-college-76060a99

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@Nyctofiles 26 May 2021

I'm anxious about college `Off My Chest Article No. 1` The end of academic year is around the corner. Grade 12 students will be freshmen in college in a few months. I am one of them. College will be too far different from what I've used to in elementary and high school. College will be something new and different to me. In college, I'll meet new people again, there will be new system, I will have tougher subjects, and this phase is linked to my future career. Days are passing by and time is running. I am graduating in Senior High School. Then, college is waving and I have a lot of things anxious about it. Anxious about university admission The Covid-19 pandemic affects mostly everything. It affects businesses and jobs, transportation, tourism, and entertainment industry and the education system including college/ university admission. Many universities and colleges don't have entrance exams or admission tests. They will base on my grades since Junior High School up to Senior High to evaluate whether I'm deserving to be admitted in their university. My dream university and top choice is one of them too which is the University of the Philippines. After the school year ended when I was in Grade 11,no classes, I bought books and reviewers online to prepare for entrance exams especially on UPCAT. I studied and reviewed most of the time, setting anime and games aside. Then, UP announced that there will be no UPCAT. I'm slightly disappointed with the news because I already put an effort to it. Anyways, I still used what I've reviewed in entrace exams in PMA, TUP-V and other one state college here and I passed. I am worried because they will base the evaluation primarily on my grades since Grade 8 up to Grade 11. My general average is above 90 though but there are subject grades that are too low that I'm not confident about. My Math grades are no that high in my whole high school and my Science grades when I was in Grade 8 and Grade 9 too. My course choices are all Engineering causing me to become more anxious because of grades in STEM subjects are not excellent. Which I think does not suit in one of the top universities in the country. The results will be out in July. As I am becoming closer to that month, I feel more pressured and anxious. And a lot of people expect too much to me. On the bright side, because of the grade-basis system, I am able to apply to some universities that I like too. Before pandemic, these schools provide entrance exams in their campus. I don't want to risk and spend money to travel to NCR from Neg. Occidental for a test I am not confident and sure to pass. These are Polytechnic University of the Philippines and Philippine State College for Aeronautics. I used the change in admission process on my side. I am still worried about the results that will be released in a few months because of my past grades. I also applied to some universities in my province. Gladly, they provide entrance exams. Just recently,they posted tge results and I'm glad to be qualified in Technological University in the Philippines and Carlos Hilado Memorial State College. But these universities /college are just my back up when I didn't qualified to the first three I mentioned earlier. Grades from the past is a factor for my university in the future. Because of this, I have regrets and I wished that I put some extra effort back then. My grades could be better and I could have achieved more. The past is already in the past, so I'm looking forward to the future. Anxious about distant learning There's no face to face classes in schools because of the pandemic. Because of this I have hard time adjusting with the method of distant learning such as modules and virtual classes. I guess, our classes will be online in college. It will be hard for me because I don't have a good gadgets for online class like laptop and we don't have stable Internet connection. I might be also left behind by my classmates. Currently, in Grade 12,having module is draining. I didn't learn and it seem ineffective. I am worried in college because my subjects will be tougher and may be I won't learn through distant learning. I don't just go to school to study but also escape the environment at home. When I was in Grade 11, I go home at night even our class is just half day in the morning. In school, I have friends to spend time with–my comfort and peace. When I am at home, I am always stressed because of the noisy environment and I don't have friends in our neighborhood. I'm hoping in that in college, I will move in a dormitory away from our home for face to face classes but the pandemic came. Having a noisy environment causes me stress and loses my focus and concentration. In college, my learning environment is still out house and I don't like this circumstance. Modules and online learning causes me too much stress plus the environment. It negatively affects me and my mental health. I am mentally exhausted with just our modules even I am just in senior High. In college, my subjects is harder and with unstable internet connection, I will have hard and stressful time which can negatively affect me more. Also, there will be no actual classmates I am close with to ask help for. The campus life and experience that I am looking forward to since Junior High change into me facing the screen for classes. I'm worried about the distant learning this college because it affects my learning and mental health and I might have hard time to afford and adjust to it. I am hoping to #LigtasnaBalikEskwela. Honestly, I'm planning to stop after I graduate this Senior High because of ineffective distant learning in college. Anxious about my capability Since I was in Elementary, I excel in class, achieve hight grades and win competitions. Nonetheless, I'm still struggling in Mathematics. I find this subject hard and I hate it. In my whole experience in school, the lowest grade I got is in Math subject. In Grade 9, I got 79 in one quarter which is the first line-of-seven grade I got in my whole life, also I got an 80 in my Grade 10 in the same subject. Even the basics in algebra and trigonometry that was taught in Junior High School is still difficult for me. Even, on my quiz bee competitions back then, memorizing dates, percentages and anything with number is not a piece of cake. As someone who is planning to take engineering courses and who is not good at math, college will be a hell for me. Mathematics is vital in my course and has a lot of subjects that involves it. I'm planning to brush off my skills and knowledge in math again when I have extra time by reviewing. I'm going to prepare for my course and college. But still, I can't avoid to be anxious about my weakness I'll face in college which will be more difficult. Besides, I'll facing this subject again through distant learning. I am hoping to survive and learn effectively about Math and others in college. Anxious about my course choices Applying to a university requires me to choose my course/s. I already made up my mind. I already have a plan and course choices. I don't see myself from outside the STEM field. It can be observed in my Top 4 in National Career Assessment Examination (NCAE). For that reason, I will take an engineering course. This course is not my dream which is to be astronaut or pilot but can still be a stepping stone. **My Course choices in Top 3 chosen university :** *BS Aeronautical Engineering* -PHILSCA What I'm worried about are my 'what-ifs' when I take engineering. *What if STEM or Engineering is not for me? What if I don't survive in my chosen course? What if I fail because I'm weak at math? What if I am chasing a wrong target and I'm walking in a different path?* There's a lot more what-ifs in my mind which lead me to become more anxious about my course choices. In a few months, we will welcome the new school year. I will going to graduate in Senior High School and will enter college soon as freshman. As day goes by, I am becoming more anxious about university admission, distant learning, my capability in college and my course choices. In general, I'm anxious about college. 'Off My Chest' will be my new series of articles about things I want to rant or release off my chest.

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@Nyctofiles 23 May 2021

16 Twenty One Pilots' "Scaled and Icy" lyrics we can relate to Three days ago, Twenty One Pilots released their sixth album "Scaled and Icy." This album is their most colorful, vibrant and fun album in their discography. It may be sound different but still a great music from band I love. The new era, vibes, aesthetics and music plus the livestream and pink-haired Tyler are all I needed this hard times. The album consists of eleven tracks that sounds far different with their past music. Also the theme and topic of the lyrics changed but still the lyrics we can relate to. The following comments and thoughts about the lyrics are just for *fun(the italicized ones,if not in italyc– I'm serious )*, base on my on my perspective and opinion, and does not reflect what the song lyrics really mean. Good Day **"I think that I'm alright** **It's a good day"** *What I tell to myself to deny after my day was ruined.* This line is relatable back then, when everything is still normal and also it's a form of denial of how we are really today. https://youtu.be/uSnpObUx71Q Choker This whole song is relatable but here are some lines: **"I was born a choker** **Nobody's coming for me"** The choker in this line means 'a person who performs ineffectively or failes because of mental breakdown or agitation. Nobody comes for us when we're our worst version and in lowest point. **"Choking on the circumstance** **Self-sabotage is a sweet romance"** This line is just my most favorite lyrics in this song and whole album. **"Alone, I'm gonna change my circumstance** **I know I need to move right now"** *This is me having a spark of motivation to do school works that will due in an hour.* https://youtu.be/2sBRnnnZyFw Shy Away **"When I get home** **You better not be there"** *When your sibling did something bad when you are away.* **"An 'I love you'** **That isn't words** **Like a song he wrote** **That's never heard"** *Life being a single since birth;never heard of that three-words eight-letters line.* https://youtu.be/3sO-Y1Zbft4 The Outside **"I'm already bored** **I'm pretty sure I've seen this one before"** *Is this a film and you didn't like the ending? Oops.Wrong song,Taylor's impact on me.* *On the lyrics, it's me being bored watching my favorite shows I've watch a hundred times because of boredom.* **"Kids will try to take my vibes** **Or am I on the outside? "** *That feeling when you both hate kids and going out.* **"Little did they know** **That they can't touch me"** *Being introvert and hating every one be like.* https://youtu.be/m2w6GkV3U6Q Saturday **"Lose my sense a time or two** **Weeks feel like days"** *The summary of my life this pandemic.* **"You better educate your self, but never to much"** *What we really want to say to many people*. https://youtu.be/qJ19VKeDQbY Mulberry Street **"Keep your bliss** **There's nothing wrong with this"** *What I tell to my self after drinking 7 cups of my obsession –coffee; watching anime all day, and enjoying and pleasure.* Do what makes you happy. https://youtu.be/uBcWM0sXdgk Formidable **"And I know that we just met** **But could you take me everywhere you've ever been? "** *This is after you met your date online and thinking to start life with him/her.* https://youtu.be/jek7Wy2VA2s Bounce Man **"Runnin'away don't make you wrong"** */*Runs outside during an exam*. He is right. Sometimes avoiding and escaping a situation don't make us wrong. *But not in this case Tyler.* https://youtu.be/MAZo87a-Wqo No Chances **"We spent some weekends on the grind"** *Definitely you before pandemic.* https://youtu.be/8_tMRvpzDVc Redecorate **"I don't want to go like this"** When your mom chose what you're going to wear. https://youtu.be/6_GCsQRS3kM

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@Nyctofiles 22 May 2021

"It's more fun in the Philippines ": 12/81 provinces visited "It's more fun in the Philippines!" Indeed, with more than seven thousand islands and 81 provinces, this country has a lot of surprises to offer. Out of 81 provinces in the country, I've been on the 12 provinces. I met a lot of people, experienced different cultures,and tasted different delicacies. But that's not enough, there are more to go. Exploring the country is one of my dreams before travelling the world. And I already been to 12 provinces in the country. Here they are: 1.Metro Manila Yeah, not actually a province. The first in the list is Metro Manila, where everything started. I was born in Paranaque City in 2002 and taken cared of babysitter who lives nearby to my family's home for more or less four years. My parents are already taking care of my brother and sister who were still toddlers at that time, so that's why I'm in different roof and hands. Metro Manila is always on my route going to different provinces, and the Manila Pier and Ninoy Aquino International Airport is located there so I've been there, countless times. Actually, I haven't visited well-known attractions in Metro Manila such as Intramuros and Luneta Park but frequently passed by on my trips. What we frequently visit there are the malls like SM MOA, Festival Mall,and SM North and other good places to shop like Divisoria and Baclaran. One of my favorite experiences there in Metro Manila is my Complete physical Exam(CPE) for PMA Cadel application last January. I stayed in AFP Health Service Command in V. Luna, Quezon City together with other entrance exam passers. We took different medical exams like dental, neuro-psychological exam, ECG, and blood test, and you name it. Most of us there are from Visayas so I made friends easily. Unluckily, I haven't qualified for becoming a cadet but I am still proud by reaching this point and passing the initial entrance exam. I am proud of my acquaintances and friends in our batch that managed to be cadets. 2. Cavite Next on the list, Cavite. My parents took me when I was four and we moved to Bacoor, Cavite. I finished my Kindergarten to second grade of my studies there. We usually go to malls while we are in this province and also having a trip to our go-to destination every summer–Tagaytay. I miss the view of Taal Volcano and the taste of tarts and other delicacies there. Also, when I was in Grade 1,we had a field trip to Tagaytay Picnic Grove. I moved there again and stayed with my relatives after transferring from. I graduated in elementary school in Cavite and bid goodbyes to my friends there. Last January, I stayed there again for a night only in my aunt's house and visited my other relatives and close cousins there. If I can stay longer, I would but I already have a plane ticket so I had no choice to go home. 3.Albay Then, there's Albay. My 'Mamay'and 'Papay' the ones who took care of me that I mentioned earlier, brought me there. My childhood memories are vague now but I remember that we stayed in a farm. I am also remembering that we harvested sweet potatoes on a hillside, drying Gabi leaves and eating these as 'Laing' and I nearly burned a hut by playing with fire. I guess, I developed my fear of toads in Albay. Because I remember that there's a lot of huge toads here which I rarely see when I am in Paranaque. 4.Bulacan Another province to add in the list is Bulacan. Mamay and Papay also took me to Bulacan,in the month of December. This is province is the 'Firecrackers Capital'of the country so I remember that every night ,even New Year are still weeks away, the sky is decorated by numerous fireworks display. Then when I was in Kindergarten, we had a field trip there. We went to well-known Barasoain Church and to the 8 Waves Resort. I remember a verge of death because of drowning in the resort by following other older students in the 5-feet part of the pool with man made waves. Gladly, someone saved me. 5.Batangas Another province to the list is Batangas. During the time when we are still living in Cavite, Batangas is our go-to place for outing together with other relatives because of beautiful beaches like Laiya. I also been there a few times because the port going to Occidental Mindoro is located in this province. 6. Laguna What's next? Laguna on the list. When I was in Grade 1, after our field trip in Tagaytay Picnic Grove, we went to Enchanted Kingdom in Laguna. I remember that I rode roller coaster, carousel and Swan Lake. Also, after becoming soaking wet after the water ride 'Rio Grande', we dried ourselves in giant swing and other rides. Laguna is our another go-to summer destination because of numerous hot spring resorts in the province. We went to Splash Island Resort when we are still living in Cavite. 7.Palawan Plus one on the list, Palawan. One of my favorite provinces in the country. In 2012,we had a vacation in Palawan. There are a lot of place to visit in this big province. In Puerto Princesa, we visited the infamous Puerto Princesa Subterranean River. We also went to Palawan Wildlife Rescue and Conservation Center or Palawan Crocodile Farm. I seen a lot of animals and learned about them. I also seen a lot of crocodiles which are usually found in the rivers of Palawan. I also experienced firefly watching in the river during the night,riding a zipline, and entering a butterfly orchard. We also went to El Nido,Palawan. The trip is long but the view going there is rewarding. I love the beaches in El Nido and we went island-hopping. I also seen unique animals there like Balinsasayaw and squirrels. My experience there feels like a hundred vacations because this province has a lot to offer, but yun PalaWan.(Nice joke) I wish to visit this province again, not the pawnshop. 8. Occidental Mindoro Also, in the list is Occidental Mindoro. I also experienced moving and studying from Grade 3 to Grade 5 in Lubang Island, Occidental Mindoro. I developed myself especially in academics there because of best teachers and competitive students. I also experienced a vacation in the main island of Mindoro. We went to San Jose-capital of Occidental Mindoro. 9.Neg. Occidental Another province in my list is Neg. Occidental. I won't mention the whole name because it might me marked by this site as offensive. I am currently residing in this province full of sugarcane. I moved there after graduating in Elementary in Bacoor, Cavite. I started in Junior High School here and now going to graduate in Senior High School(currently in Grade 12). I haven't completely explored this province yet but already been in different cities and municipalities. 10. Neg. Oriental Neg. Oriental is one of the best provinces to add in the list. Thanks to my contest when I was in Grade 11,I had a chance to go there. We won in Semifinals of 'Positive Energy Battle of the Brains' held in Bacolod City,Neg. Occidental. The grand finals was held in Dumaguete City, Neg. Oriental. Robi Domingo is a guest in this contest because he endorsed renewable and clean energy. We are just Third runner-up in the Grand Finals. I stayed there with our coach and my partner for just two days. Gladly,the contest management gave all contestant an accommodation and also consolation prize. In my short stay,we just went to Starbucks and in the baywalk. I really love the heritage in Dumaguete with buildings still back in time ,and the delicious Silvanas. 11.Iloilo There's more! Iloilo in the list. I went there when I was Grade 11 to compete in Regional School Press Conference held in Iloilo National High School. My category is Sports Writing in Filipino, something I am new at. 12. Cebu This list won't be complete without the majestic Cebu. The reason I went there is to save money by having a Cebu-Manila flight (cost around Php 2000) rather than in my province's Bacolod-Manila flight(cost more than Php 8000) going to Quezon City for our CPE for Cadet application. Luckily,because I a kind man that let me ride in his truck then I managed to go to Cebu City from a far municipality where the port is located(where I docked after crossing Cebu from Neg Occidental.) I stayed in the CENTCOM before my flight. They are strict so I stayed in my room most of the time. I just went out to process my travel pass going to Manila. I entered SM City Cebu, ate lunch, and shopped for my pasalubong for friends. I have regrets that I didn't eat 'puso'in the side walk as lunch. Again, instead of spending too much money going home after my stay in QC. We take a flight from Manila to Cebu. That time, I was not alone. I was with my new friends whom I met in QC and also PMAEE passers who were also living in the same province as mine. We planned to go to SM seaside City Cebu that later cancelled because we need to go back as soon as possible to the port to go home in Neg. Occidental. We just went inside SM City Cebu instead. 13.Tarlac Last but not the least, Tarlac. I went thereto be quarantined and tested for the virus together with other PMA applicants before our medical exam proper in Quezon City. We stayed in NOLCOM. the physical fitness test was hekd there which consists of pull ups, push ups, sit ups, and 3.2 km run. ****** Soon, I will have new provinces to add in this list. I really want to visit Batanes,tge Cordilleras,Ilocos Region and Palawan again. I want to travel all over the Philippines before my 30s and before setting foot in other countries and travelling the world. Just 12 out of 81 provinces. A long way to go, more places to explore, and more people to meet. There are more surprises the Philippines can offer to me. I am excited to this to happen –exploring the whole country.

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@Nyctofiles 21 May 2021

Tomorrow is a FAN-tastic day for Fans. A new day. New things to look forward to. New surprises. Also, new music and album releases from different artists. Tomorrow is a FANtastic day for fans and a day of ear-gasm because of new music from bands and artist we love. As a fan and someone who indulge with the music from various artists in different genres, I am excited for the new day coming. Some of my favorite artists /bands and others I listen to will release their new music and albums. I love it and kinda hate it too,at the same time. I love it because I will have new content to consume, enjoy and will be my new favorites. And I hate it too because I can't focus to listen and stream to one artist. **What I'm looking forward to** ***Twenty One Pilots*** The musical duo–Twenty One Pilots will release their upcoming sixth album "Scaled and Icy" tomorrow. **Tracklist:** Good Day Choker Shy Away The Outside Saturday Never Take It Mulberry Street Formidable Bounce Man No Chances Redecorate Feel the saturation! Scaled and Icy is more vibrant and colorful compared to their previous albums. This album show how they experiment on their music and still part of 'Twenty One Pilots lore'. A retro vibes and aesthetics –things this album brings. The first single "Shy Away" was already released on April 8,2021. This song is addictive and I've already listen to this song a hundred times. https://youtu.be/3sO-Y1Zbft4 The band released an another single "Choker" on April 30,2021. This song is my favorite from the album as of now. Choker really showcase Tyler Joseph's powerful song writing skills–relatable and hits the listener hard. I didn't listen and stream to this like the way I did with Shy Away, but this is definitely my new go-to song when I feel not okay and empty. https://youtu.be/2sBRnnnZyFw "Choking on the circumstance, Self-sabotage is a sweet romance. " One of my favorite lines in Choker. The third single "Saturday" was released last Tuesday. I dont like the song nor hate it. I have hard time to digest it. But still a great song, may be not for me https://youtu.be/qJ19VKeDQbY I am not just excited for their new album. There's also a live stream experience or virtual concert. I am excited to their live stream because I won a ticket that worth $20 from a giveaway in twitter. I will be going to have this experience. I am thankful that luck worked on my side. I'll share my experience in another article soon. Scaled and Icy might be a propaganda in the lore. But still, this era is exciting and seems fun. With new aesthetics and vibes, new album and music, new story and of course Tyler Joseph's new hair. **Feel the saturation and don't Shy Away. Lend your ears for the new Twenty One Pilots album tomorrow.** *Olivia Rodrigo* The rising Fil-Am singer-songwriter, Olivia Rodrigo will release her new album "Sour." **Tracklist**: brutal traitor driver's license 1 step forward,3 steps backward deja vu good 4 U enough for you happier jealousy, jealousy favorite crime hope ur ok I am not a big fan of Olivia.But she's the Rodrigo I am proud of. She's also a Swiftie, a reason that I listen to her music. I appreciate her good story-telling in song writing skills and her voice. The first single from the album "Driver's License" became a smash hit that brought Olivia to mainstream spotlight. The second single "Deja Vu" lead Olivia Rodrigo by being the first artist to debut their first two singles inside the Top 10 in the whole Hot 100 history by reaching 8th spot on the chart. Also, the third single, "good 4 u" was released a week before the album. These three singles have different styles and mood defining the "super versatile " body of art, which is the ambition of Olivia. **Tomorrow don't be Sour. Try to listen to Olivia Rodrigo's new album. It might be "good 4 u. "** *Waterparks* The band Waterparks will also be releasing their 4th studio album "Greatest Hits." **Tracklist**: Greatest Hits Fuzzy Lowkey as Hell Numb Violet! Snow Globe Just Kidding The Secret Life of Me American Graffiti You'd Be Paranoid Too Fruit Roll Ups Like It Gladiator (Interlude) Magnetic Crying Over it All Ice Bath See You in the Future I just discovered this band recently and I am captivated. I wish I discovered this earlier. Their genre(alt rock, pop punk, pop rock and moder rock) is the music I am really into. They already released numerous singles like "Numb","Snow Globe" and "Violet! " **Give Greatest Hits a try tomorrow and it will Hit you.** What You May be Looking Forward to *BTS* If you're an Army, I know you are very excited for tgeur new single "Butter ". I know you can't wait to dance to this new song. ****Other singles to be relased tomorrow**** : Anne-Marie and Niall Horan –Our Song Lil Nas X– Sun Goes Down Marshmello and Jonas Brothers –Leave Before You Love Me and more! ****Other albums to be released tomorrow**** : Blake Shelton-Body Language Pink-All I Know So Far:Setlist And more. Tomorrow,my ears are ready for new music. Music that will give me comfort in these hard times. New music that will inspire me, fills my emptiness and express what I feel. I am a walking 'excitement ' today, more than ready for music that my favorite artists will release. What things are you looking forward to tomorrow? From what you have read, mine is music. *Photo credits to these artists' social media accounts. Others are my personal screenshots.

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@Nyctofiles 19 May 2021

Cryptography Mania:Atbash cipher ,Rot13 and more! Reading mystery thriller detective novels like Project Loki and MoriarTea and watching anime anime with the same genre like Detective Conan help me to enhance my analysis,intuition,and judgment. I learned some life lessons too indulging on these. Furthermore, these are good ways to kill my time and cease my boredom. Not just all of that, my interest about codes and ciphers bloomed because of reading mystery-thriller books and watching detective anime. There are countless codes and cipher around. Some are still unsolved, others are complex, while there are simple and easy ones. Prepare your notes, here are four simple and easy to learn ciphers: 1. Atbash **The Cipher and Its History** Atbash is a substitution cipher that simply reciprocates the plain text alphabet to produce ciphertext alphabet, the reason that it is also called mirror cipher, backwards alphabet, or reverse alphabet. The Atbash cipher was originally used for the Hebrew alphabet. It was believed by scholars to be invented between -1000 and -500 BCE and originated in Israel, and its use pre-fates Egyptian examples of encryption. It was even used in the Bible just like in Jeremiah 25:26 that reads, " The king of Sheshach shall drink after them. " The word Sheshach can be decrypted to Babylon using Atbash in it's original Hebrew equivalent. **The Encryption and Decryption** The encryption is just a piece of cake for the reason that this cipher is just simple. To encrypt a word or you want the word to be unreadable for others just replace letters from the first with the letters from the other one, following the pattern that the first letter(A) is equivalent to the last letter (Z), the second letter (B) replaced by the second to the last letter (Y) and so on. So when letter A is encrypted, it will become Z;the B will be Y; and C will be X. For example: **Read Cash** will become `Ivzw Xzhs` To decrypt, just do the opposite of encryption process. For example: `Lmv Krvxv` is **One Piece** when decrypted–one of the best anime around. For easier encryption and decryption you can use a table or copy just like in the photo above. 2. A1Z26 **The Cipher** A1Z26 Cipher or sometimes called Letter-to-Number cipher or Latin Aphabet Cipher is an extremely simple cipher. It is done by replacing each letter by its position in the alphabet, and vice versa. A is 1 and Z will be 26,hence the name A1Z26. Because A1z26 cipher is simple and easy to learn, it is commonly used cipher in kid's show like Gravity Falls. **The Encryption and Decryption** To encrypt just convert each letters to the number that corresponds to its position on the alphabet. The letter A is the first letter in the alphabet thus it will become 1 when encrypted, B is second letter so it will be 2,C is 3, while D is 4 and so on. For example: One of the best bands– **TWENTY ONE PILOTS** will become `20 23 5 14 20 25` `15 14 5` `16 9 12 15 20 19` when encrypted using the said cipher. In decryption, just do the opposite. Determine which letter corresponds to the number by knowing letters' position and order in the alphabet. For example :Be decoding `6 15 12 11 15 18 5`,you will have one of Taylor's best album–**Folklore**. A1Z26 will be much easier if you memorized not just the alphabet but also the position and order of letters. If not, you can have the copy of each letters and their equivalent when encrypted for easier decryption and encryption, like the photo above. 3. Rot13 **The Cipher and Its History** ROT13(stands for ROTate by 13 places or Rotation 13,with variations like hyphenated ROT-13 or lowercase rot13) is a simple substitution cipher that replaces a letter with the 13th letter after it in the alphabet. ROT13 is a special case of Caesar Cipher –one of the simplest and known encryption technique in which a letter is replaced by a letter following a constant number in positions down the alphabet that wad developed in Ancient Rome. The name of the cipher 'ROT13'emerged on Usenet in early 1980s. This is not originally used to make a plaintext a secret but to have a reader a choice and determination whether to decode it. That's why, it is commonly used in online forums (Usenet) as means of hiding joke punchlines, solutions to puzzles, story and movie spoilers, anad offensive materials. **The Encryption and Decryption** To encrypt with ROT-13, replace a letter by another letter that place 13 ranks after it in the alphabet ;therefore each letter is shifted by 13 positions in the English alphabet. The letter A will be N, B will become O, C is P and it continues. For example: **JEAN KIRSTEIN** is crypted to `WRNA XVEFGRVA` using ROT13. The decryption with ROT13 is nearly the same with the encryption because of the reciprocal substituting alphabet used. To decrypt, just do the opposite. Move 13 places backward to decode a letter. So the letter Z will become M, Y will be L, X is K, and so on. For example:By decrypting the ciphertext `Terra Qnl`,you will have Green Day as the message. For decryption and encryptiom with ease, you can use a ROT13 Cipher correspondence chart just like the image above. 4.Keyboard Cipher **The Cipher** The Keyboard Substitution Cipher, also called QWERTY Cipher is a simple cipher that substitutes each letter of the alphabet with the letter with the same position/order in the keyboard or typewriter. **The Encryption and Decryption** Encryption with Keyboard Cipher is pretty easy. Just replace a letter of the alphabet from the letter in a keyboard(QWERTY is commonly used) with the same order/position (following the left to right keys, from top to bottom row). The first letter A will become Q because it is the first letter in the keyboard. B will be W, C will become E, D is R when encrypted and so on. For example: Encrypting the plaintext **KING HARLEQUIN**, you will have the ciphertext `AOFU IQKSTJXOF.` To decrypt just do the opposite or use a substitution table. Encryption and decryption with Keyboard Cipher will become easier with the use of substitution guide,like in the picture above. These ciphers are easy to learn, are simple, and encryption and decryption are just piece of cake. Due to these ciphers' simplicity, they are easy to be decrypted using frequency analysis and determining these common ciphers used. Because these ciphers are weak, these are not usually used to hide messages but used in entertainment like puzzles, kid's show and games. ***Let the games begin. Let's have some fun!*** Decode the following for a prize. One person per item only. And which of the following ciphers is your favorite? `14 25 3 20 15 6 9 12 5`(A1Z26) `WZIPMVHH` (Atbash) `GALYBE FJVSG` (ROT13) `LXFRQN` (Keyboard Cipher)

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@Nyctofiles 13 May 2021

Poetry 101: My poems during my darkest hours Just like what I said in my introductory post (read that to know more about me), I write to express my self. I write particularly poems for relief, express what's makes my chest heavy , slow down my overthinking mind,and fill the emptiness in my heart. I do this rather than talking about I feel and think to my friends and family. Writing is a big help to my mental health especially in the start of pandemic. https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/nyctofiles-all-about-me-8085f082 Here are some of poems written last year. Written during the night, in the dark. Darkness, Take my Hand You are always there by my side, Even in my empty heart and busy mind. In the morning, you're in my black coffee, Waking me up as the mug becomes empty. You're there as my shadow throughout the day, Though weak and dull, you still protect me as shade. You're still present in the night–so deep, As my eyes shut, cried myself to sleep. Let us escape this tiring world around. Darkness, take my hand. I wrote this poem because during that time, I think that darkness is the only one there for me. Also, I love darkness. I'm Nyctophile for a reason. It's one of my favorite personal poems. Haikus Face painted with a smile, Yet there's a void in his heart. Feeling so **empty**. ~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~ There are people 'round, Yet he seems not existing. Feeling so **alone**. ~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~ What is he doing? Why those seem to be nothing? Feeling so **worthless** . ~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~ He's trying his best, For them, it seems nothing. **Unappreciated**. On these haikus, of course, I am talking about my self. I wrote these because I feel I am the last words from each haiku. Writing these poems really help me to identify what I need to change in my mindset to grow and understand and know what I really feel and perspective of my self. Dead Stars The sky is glittered with twinkling stars That are lonely from a far. Their light may takes a million years Before reaching our planet earth. So maybe, the stars above our Already exploded and now dead. I wrote this one because stars glow bright and dying at the same time, just like most of us. I can relate to stars, they are in the dark and alone (other celestial bodies are still far ,for me), they shine and dying inside. Also,this is inspired by Science–especially Theory of Relativity given the fact that light of some star takes millions of years to see them probably they are now dead even though we still see their light. Bitterness The bitterness I consume is eating me: There's aftertaste of meds in my mouth, The dark coffee kissed my lips, Alcohol intoxicated my blood, And dark chocolate stained by fingers. They became bitterness in my cold heart. I wrote this one inspired from "we are what we eat" or consume. I know that these things may be irrelevant to what we feel and our character. Also this is inspired from lyrics from Daylight of Taylor Swift : I wanna be defined by the things that I love Not the things I hate Not the things that I'm afraid of But I guess it was interpreted in the poem in a negative way. Anyways, I only drink coffee and that poem is not inspired by my true life. There are more poems in my diary, some are still unfinished. Hoping to share them with you soon. These poems are not just written to kill my tike and distract my self from things that bother me. These are my forms of expression when I don't have someone to talk to. These bring relief in my chest and mind. Poetry is not just a literature, it is amy outlet for expression to cope in these hard times. Read my other poems: https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/poetry-101-archived-poems-about-her-6797c143 https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/poetry-101poem-about-having-hope-inthese-hard-times-f1aa65ae

@Nyctofiles 12 May 2021

"More than 1000 views! Your articles have reached a total of 1002 views. " 🎉🎉🎉YAY! HAPPY 1K VIEWS! 🎉🎉🎉 Thank you everyone especially to my 35 subscribers and my sponsor @scottcbusiness . I'm happy for my read. cash journey, sometimes flop and sometimes not.

@Nyctofiles 12 May 2021

Poetry 101: Archived poems about her Heavenly Bodies The moon has dark side no one ever seen, Flawed by craters and sometimes empty. I'm a wolf, adoring it in extreme distance, I want to take it but there's no chance. The comet wandered in space,so lonely; Then came in my life in serendipity I'm an astronomer and it piques my interest, Its existence left me struck, mind in mess. The sun radiates its ethereal sunshine, And driven away the darkness of mine. I'm a sunflower gazing on it, It gave my life hope, light and heat. The stars glittered my darkest nights, Dull or bright, still pleasing to my sight. I'm an astrologer and stars are my everything, Giving my life an essential meaning. You are the heavenly bodies above: The moon, comet, sun and stars I love. In darkness, you are all I see; I wish someday you will revolve and shine for me. I really love the heavenly bodies,in fact I reallt want to become an astronaut when I was still a kid. So when I compare someone to heavenly bodies, maybe,she was my dream. Haikus enchanting beauty, jam-packed bliss when I see it. demons inside danced joy in stolen stares. orbiting in my deep mind, images of you. zeal to start a talk, your smiles made me speechless–hushed, there's lump in my throat. I really love haikus. So simple and easy to make. I don't have to worry about rhymes but still hard to manage the meter. Short Poem Her name is not Pandora but she seems to received gifts from gods. A girl with all the gifts. -Nyctofiles I don't actually consider it a poem. I tried to copy Lang Leav's style in this one. These poems were about my crush. I really love poetry and I used it to express myself. Check out my other poems here: https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/poetry-101poem-about-having-hope-inthese-hard-times-f1aa65ae https://read.cash/@Nyctofiles/poetry-101-poem-about-hope-b470a5c3