Is it possible to turn quarantine to your advantage?

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Avatar for Nesha_pisac85
4 years ago

Unfortunately, corona virus still does not stop. In my opinion the time of quarantine is near again.

Everyone around is striving to use self-isolation in order to turn into a “better version of themselves” - this is what coaches, authors of personal growth trainings, fitness trainers on Instagram, and just acquaintances who report about their culinary exploits, a new foreign language, are persuaded to this every day. kilograms and books read. What is the endless "improvement" fraught with for our psyche? And is it worth even aiming at self-improvement in the turbulent times of the coronavirus crisis?

Social isolation

The situation of self-isolation is described by two concepts of modern psychology: non-normative crisis and borderline situation. A crisis is a period when habitual values, skills and life guidelines cease to be relevant for the changed reality. Sometimes this stage naturally accompanies human development - for example, adolescence, and then we are talking about a normative crisis. But there are also sudden, drastic changes that no one expected. In this case, the crisis is called abnormal.

A borderline situation is understood as circumstances that are associated with a risk to human life and health or are subjectively perceived as such.

Both do not necessarily have negative consequences, sometimes even the opposite: new values ​​are formed in a person, ways of adapting to reality are expanding. But in order to get through this difficult period, resources are needed, especially the most basic ones, such as adequate sleep, balanced nutrition and rest.

Is it possible in general in such a state to switch to self-improvement and escape from stress?

When it comes to self-improvement, the main question you should ask yourself is, "Why?" Both the crisis and the borderline situation are a regime of increased stress on the psyche around the clock. You have to deal with very difficult experiences, withstand tremendous pressure. This is a period when even the most elementary actions take a lot of energy. You wouldn't ask someone who has run a long marathon to go straight to a fitness center to work on their abs, would you? Likewise, here is the main question that a person should ask himself in a difficult situation: "How can I help myself, how to support, how to cope with distress?" Distress is understood as a negative form of stress that has a negative impact on the general psychophysiological state.

Of course, everyone puts something of their own into the concept of "self-improvement". However, whatever it is, this process requires a certain emotional resource, which in times of crisis is usually in great deficit. Now about the "distraction from stress". The distraction strategy itself is one of the adaptive ways to cope with those difficult life circumstances that are beyond our control. Provided, of course, that this is not done through alcohol abuse or other self-destructive behavior. But this is not always possible. If the reality outside the window "storms", it can be difficult to be distracted from it. In this situation, I would recommend relying on what helps you personally: watching TV shows helps some, talking on the phone with friends for others, and moderate physical activity for others. Perhaps, for someone, learning and reading developmental literature is just one of these ways of relaxation. Perhaps someone from the outside will appreciate this as self-improvement. But the main question is - does it become easier for you personally to go through the conditions of self-isolation with the help of such activities? If so, why not. But if this is experienced as a compulsion, as another heavy obligation, save your strength. They will still be useful to you.

Where do the promises to start "a new life on Monday" come from? In this case, in quarantine?

I think promises to start living in a new way on Monday (Friday, next week or month) is such a good old way of planning what you really don't want to do, but "people say what to do."

What are the risks of perfectionism?

A whole bunch of mental disorders: anxiety, depressive conditions, increased chemical dependence and other unpleasant manifestations. But the saddest thing is that perfectionism is hardly useful even for achieving success. In order to succeed in any business, you need to be ready to make a huge number of mistakes, to regularly face difficult feelings of powerlessness, disappointment, fatigue, confusion, shame - and be able to withstand them. The more difficult the cherished goal, the more significant should be the level of self-support, which is understood as the ability to treat oneself kindly in times of difficulty. As far as perfectionism is concerned, this is in every way a losing strategy. At the cognitive level, perfectionism carries so-called dysfunctional judgments, that is, distorted ideas about the world and about oneself. Emotionally, it aggravates the state of distress. Physiologically, at its most extreme, perfectionism leads to increased fatigue, eating disorders, and sleep deprivation. This does not mean that mental health involves a passive attitude and abandonment of goals - quite the opposite. But on the road to success, it is important to rely on two factors.

  • First, on the real values and desires of the individual, which come "from the heart", and not from other people's attitudes and ideas about "coolness" or duty.

  • Secondly, on objective reality: the presence or absence of certain resources, a sober calculation of time costs.

Perfectionism, to put it mildly, is not compatible with a both factors.

Is it normal if a person, instead of wanting to become better during quarantine, wants to succumb to laziness and live in an "energy-saving mode"?

Not just normal, but very reasonable. The main task of the psyche during a crisis and a borderline situation is to survive the increased load, to withstand the situation of uncertainty and to adapt to new circumstances. Adapting to change and reassessing skills is usually impossible at an early stage, since it is not yet clear in which direction, in fact, you need to change. A more advantageous strategy for the psyche in this case is the process of slowing down: a person listens to himself, his actual needs, takes care of his condition and gradually accumulates strength for the transition to a new stage of life. As for such a thing as "laziness", then, in my opinion, this is a completely mythical construct. There is a conflict between the desired and the necessary. There is a low energy level. There are objectively difficult, stressful circumstances. Sometimes laziness takes the form of an unconscious protest against someone or something. Very often, laziness signals a person's unwillingness to meet with difficult thoughts and feelings. Pure laziness in the way our culture usually describes it is almost impossible to meet.

What dictates the demand of modern society for continuous self-improvement?

I think this is due to a paradigm shift of personal good. For centuries, a person's life has been determined by his social class, gender, age, religious norms and position in the family system. Within this paradigm, little could be influenced at will.

The XX century brought many changes, and one of them was the idea that everyone is able to achieve any cherished goal - one has only to want. This is fine in itself, but there are nuances.

  • First, there is continuous pressure from society, which often begins with the parental family, broadcasting what exactly should be considered a success, what should be dreamed of and what “real happiness” is. With this approach, a person is often deprived of the opportunity to think about what he really wants.

  • Secondly, in the most difficult cases (but, unfortunately, quite frequent in my practice), a person cannot even clearly tell about who he is and who he really is. Where, in theory, there should be a person, there is something like a broken mirror. Whom, tell me, in this case, "improve"? Yourself or someone else's ideas about yourself? Not to mention the cases when people are trying to improve something that is actually great in itself.

  • Third, the desire for equality for all. This is all wonderful. However, in fact, we are not equal. We all have completely different starting positions: financial, family, emotional, social. Any success provides a certain resource. Sometimes wealthy parents living in the capital are such a resource. Sometimes - a strong nervous system, won in the genetic lottery. But if you ignore the resource factor, you get the impression that anyone can achieve anything, you just need to "try". And this is an illusion.

Just in case, I will indicate: I do not want to say at all that dreaming is harmful, goals are unrealizable, and personal development is bad. Of course it is not. I am only stating what is important:

  • in matters of self-improvement, first of all, honestly answer oneself to the question of what that “self” is

  • assess your own resources soberly

  • learn to support yourself where resources are scarce, as well as get support from outside

  • modify the idea of "personal perfection" and replace it with something that is more consistent, on the one hand, with the subjective world of man, and on the other, with objective reality

Is it okay to constantly be in a race for the "best version of yourself"?

The question of the norm is quite complex. Modern culture dictates that being in constant race and competition with each other is both normal and beneficial. Modern psychology, in turn, asks: what price are you willing to pay for such a "norm" and what will you get in return?

What can be said to justify those people who have chosen a "passive" position for themselves during quarantine?

The main thing that you must understand is that there is no need to look for excuses for this.

How not to start to complex at the sight of photos and videos of people who have devoted the entire quarantine to endless "achievement"?

I think it's important to remind yourself that the picture on social media is always the tip of the iceberg. You do not see the current psychological state of the person, and you may not know that anxiety disorder or manic phase of bipolar disorder is sometimes attached as a bonus to the next certificate of successful success. You do not know what resources a person has, who could afford the next "achievement". You can't even be sure if it brought him or her joy. But even if we assume that someone else's certificate got someone easily and simply, and brought joy, and benefit too, - what do you personally get from this? How does this speak about your real values, desires, your personality, finally? Sometimes only a psychologist can help to deal with these issues.

The photos used in this article are taken from the site www.google.com

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4 years ago

Comments

During the quarantine, I wanted to go crazy, I used to walk with the children, we were sitting in the pastry shop, in the cafe, then suddenly there was nothing, who was talking about what, we just threw ourselves from the online school.

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4 years ago

During the quarantine or the lock down a person need to focus on issues or activities that will help him build his feature or career

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4 years ago

is real to turn your quarantine to advantage by reading hard working hard e.g barbing saloon and every other activities that will help you during quarantine

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4 years ago

Nice article and you always give us Great article and hope you keep working like this ☺️☺️☺️

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4 years ago

Interesting article

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4 years ago

I red just very interesting articles from you! I hope corona will end and we all can function as we before and to be stronger before this waves of impacts..

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4 years ago

Nice article friend, keep it up

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4 years ago

Unfortunately, this madness will not be able to end until the vaccine is found, or until everyone starts strictly applying the prescribed measures. As long as I have to warn students to put on a mask, as long as I see people without masks in stores, as long as I hear from various people that all this is made up and as long as they protest against the violation of rights, the madness will continue.

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4 years ago

true, the madness continues but we have a great selection of series to watch:)

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4 years ago

At least they help us move a little from madness :)

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4 years ago

people are very spoiled and their quarantine is difficult, you can always find a way to use your time usefully and fun.

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4 years ago

As you so,ao you reap. That mean we did to much sin that why this punishment will comes to the world.Times are remaining we need to be change us otherwise more big punishment Will come.

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4 years ago

During this period of the pandemic, a lot have been realised, most people now realise that they could survive without so much social life.

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4 years ago

Hmm such a interesting article dear..quarantine teach us many things. How we spend time on good purposes.. Thank you for sharing such a great article

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4 years ago

Quarantine didn't bother me much because I am creative, hardworking and I always have a way to fill my time. There is no idleness. However, my husband and son find it very difficult to bear it and they are very nervous and aggressive.

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4 years ago

I don't believe that there will be quarantine again, anyone who has the will and the idea can use it, and when there are such circumstances, I give an example, one family started producing masks and disinfectants and used the Corona virus nicely.

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4 years ago

If we are happy before quarantine, we will be also happy during the quarantine.

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4 years ago

I have been leading a quarantine lifestyle for years. It is not difficult for me to be in the house non-stop, but ... Literal quarantine when we are all closed in the same space without the possibility to walk or go to the store, the pharmacy is unbearable and mentally unbearable. it really takes a lot of creativity to organize more people in a small space to function normally.

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4 years ago

How do you think you've been living in quarantine for years

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4 years ago

How do you think you've been living in quarantine for years

I expressed myself badly. I live and work in my own house. I only occasionally go to my parents or some institutions to make payments or verify some documents. So it was easiest for me when they introduced quarantine. My family members found it difficult to accept and did not like it at all.

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4 years ago

That's great ... I don't have a habit of walking around either. I feel best at home. Home is my sanctuary.

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4 years ago

That's great ... I don't have a habit of walking around either. I feel best at home. Home is my sanctuary.

that's the story

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4 years ago

A whole bunch of mental disorders: anxiety, depressive conditions, increased chemical dependence and other unpleasant manifestations

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4 years ago

Yeah of course for sure if we try to learn new things and try out different things for our benefit

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4 years ago

During the quarantine, we had a lot of homework from kindergarten, so we were not bored :D

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4 years ago

When there was the first wave of the corona in our country in Serbia, my parents were in isolation for 14 days ... They say that they spent time playing cards and people are not angry for the first two days, and the other 12 were spent in their own room, they pretended to be roommates in the dorm because they went crazy in one place for so long together ....: D

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4 years ago

I think lockdown will cause big problems for people. I feel sorry for the teenagers the most, this is by no means good for them.

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4 years ago

I am for quarantine, do you know that there is no place to lie in the hospital, there are no beds, they need to reintroduce quarantine to break the chain of wages, as much as we do not like quarantine, it is the best solution to end this madness.

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4 years ago

Yeah, that's possible becouse, in this quarantine I changed my life so great. Actually when I found this platform, that site change my life to work on this.

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4 years ago

This is really good article, congraluations

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4 years ago

Personally, it is not difficult for me to be under quarantine, but my husband does not ahah..I like to stay in my house, I think that quarantine is stressful for individuals

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4 years ago

The quarantine has forced me into finding means of making easier money. I've made more money during this quarantine than i've made 2years back, you just have to look into what people around you need and make it your source of income.

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4 years ago

I agree. We have to adapt to everything

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4 years ago

I believe that even in quarantine, people can find an occupation, hobby, additional job ... We can use that time when we are "locked" in our houses in a creative way.

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4 years ago

I believe that even in quarantine, people can find an occupation

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4 years ago

Is it possible to turn quarantine to your advantage? If you ask me NO!

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4 years ago

''the time of quarantine is near again.'' Don't worry, they will not lock down us. For a sure. Maybe in march, april, but at the moment No. First hand info ;)

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4 years ago

First hand info! Great info:)

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4 years ago