One distinction between Western and Eastern cultures when it comes to family relationships is the degree of attachment. From what I often see in Hollywood, children are the responsibility of parents until they reach a certain age when they have to stand up on their feet and be more independent. In Eastern cultures, like in the Philippines, it is not an unusual sight for a household to host several families - from parents to aunties and uncles, grandparents, children with their spouses, and their respective children up to their grandchildren. As long as the house can accommodate them, they have a place.
Families have varying dynamics. A strong bond is formed between family members, creating a distinct culture and set of values. Family relationships are different than other forms of relationships, say friendships and organizational connections. But what makes a family special?
First, we spend most of our time with our families. Our emotional involvement with them has grown deep that we become interdependent with one another. Because of this frequent association and bonding, there are frequent annoyances and petty quarrels among members. The sad part is, because of familiarity with one another, some issues are left unresolved. Moreso, cheesy confrontation seems to be awkward.
Second, family relationships are more complicated and intertwined in nature. When a member is offended, the whole family is offended. In some cases, the offended's role in the family plays an important factor - when he is the favorite child, the youngest child, the breadwinner, the sickly, etc. When you trigger a family's weakest point, expect a collective retaliation. That is why sometimes, you need to ask for forgiveness not just to the one offended but to every member of the family, and sometimes the offense lives on until the next generation.
Third, as I have said earlier, each family has a set of cultures and values. An act may not be offensive to one family, but it may be a big deal to another. Some families can easily forgive and forget, some cannot even accept an apology. Different families, different systems.
Why am I sharing this? This was influenced when I was watching a TV show where the wife discovered that her husband has another family. They were cheated on. All along they believed that their father was "clean" and a person of integrity. It was a dramatic, shocking moment for the family.
While some families can easily heal from such kind of pain, it may not the same with others. Different strokes for different folks.
That’s why we need to always pray for our families. Forgiveness in families is powerful - only when it is tapped. But, family dynamics and personality differences are in play. That’s why we need the grace and power of the Holy Spirit to help us.
I have posted a similar essay about this topic on my Facebook account. I'm glad that it resonated with some of my friends, mostly parents. Our families, no matter the dynamics, are blessings to us that must be protected and upheld in prayer.
Read my BCH-related blogs:
Bitcoin Cash Changed not only my Routine but also my Perspective
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Hi, I am Marts! Aside from read.cash, I also run my blog - martsvalenzuela.com. I plan on growing my readership while learning to improve my craft and journey towards my passion to write and publish books that add value to people.
Carpe Diem!
Yes it's really true. All we can do is to look for the good things what's for us, for everyone. Be happy and neglect all the negativities in life but serve it as a lesson. More articles and God bless.😇